Hello to you. Hope your day is going well. I was late but right on time to the Woman’s Coffee today at Grace House. I wasn’t going to go but God wouldn’t let me rest about it. Missy always makes me feel so welcome as do the other ladies. Sometimes you just need to be with other women! We talked about being a Mary or a Martha in our lives. We talked about things you try to help a teenager who has a lot of questions about God. I felt just by her sharing and the feedback we gave her God was at work to help her. We prayed for dear Charlottes sick dog Annie. Charlotte left us in tears as she had to take Annie to the vet. I’m glad I went! I usually am it’s just the going! I didn’t sleep very well last night – that’s why I didn’t want to get up and go. I always feel bad for Link because he always gets disturbed with my tossing and turning.
Isaiah 41:10New International Version
10 So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.
Hello to you. How are you? So much is going on! Be it weather or demonstrators there is a lot of unrest. In my own life I am experiencing change. My church has moved. Last night we gathered at the new location and prayed. I got kind of lost and left early because it was getting dark. Before I left, I prayed with a woman I have a Thursday prayer meeting with, Amy, and her children at the entrance to the building. She was crying and tears fell down her cheeks. So beautiful! This morning the auditorium that seats 900 was almost full! Our prayers the previous night were surely answered! I was a bit overwhelmed as was my elderly friend Roy – the seats were more comfortable but shorter and harder to get up and down in. He sat much of the service. I am not a fan of big crowds so I was a bit out of my comfort zone – I fought the urge I had to flee several times! My friend Jeannie, Roy’s sister-in-law, encouraged me not to give up on things just yet. She was glad I was there so Roy wasn’t alone. I will have to pray about all of this.
I kept thinking of the scene with Mary and Jesus in The Chosen as we read this:
Best pets – for me it’s a toss up between dogs and cats. Cats are much more independent but have the litter box thing going on. Dogs are more dependent and have their litter box that you need to clean in the yard! I miss the purring and calm nature of my cats. My Amber used to purr me to sleep and I miss her every night! Link is a barker and that’s not very soothing – everything is his job to alarm me about! I think what makes a better pet is your lifestyle. If you work a lot a dog isn’t for you. That’s why when I was active duty we had cats. I think it’s cruel to leave a dog home alone by itself for hours and hours.
What is one thing you would change about yourself?
Hello to you. Hope this finds you well. Today has been uneventful. I am feeling a little better after catching another cold. There was talk about something happening today with regard to space people but of course nothing happened! I am thinking something is brewing with the increase in sightings. I am thinking it has to do with the increasing unrest going on in the world – Sabre rattling about using nukes. If I was a space person watching all of what’s going on I think I would want to intervene too!
My answer to today’s prompt is if I could change one thing about myself I would not be Bipolar. Having this diagnosis has really limited me in so many ways. I have lost two marriages and many friendships and relationships with family. I lost a career because of this condition. The only good thing to ever come of being Bipolar was the wellspring of energy and creativity during the times I was manic. I would hardly sleep and my creative abilities seemed endless. I could draw, paint, sing, write, take awesome photos, dance, tap into the spiritual realms – all of this with little to no effort. Having the mania under control with the medication I’m on – Depakote- I can’t do much of anything anymore. This blog is my only outlet! In addition to Bipolar I have the Mal de barque syndrome where I have trouble with balance. I’m convinced it was triggered by my being tased by police when I was having a manic episode two years ago. It just won’t go away! So I guess there are actually two things I wish I could change!
Since I cannot change what I am, I have to push through with it all. I have to force myself to move forward even if I don’t want to. I pray a lot and ask for healing. I am trying to say yes more often when I would usually say no. One of the side affects of Depakote is weight gain and not feeling full after eating. With the balance challenges it’s hard to exercise to get rid of calories but I force myself to get a walk in with Link each day. I’m trying to lower my calorie count too. I am trying to say no more often to eating sweets which is my favorite type of food! Not all of what I am can be blamed on being Bipolar! I wish I could get back to size 16 jeans again. Obesity runs in my Dads side of the family so my genetics are kind of stacked against me along with my diagnosis.
Some scripture about change:
Ecclesiastes 3:1-2“To everything there is a season, and a time for every purpose under heaven: a time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, and a time to uproot”.
Isaiah 43:18-19“Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past. See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it?”.
Psalm 30:5“Weeping may stay for the night, but rejoicing comes in the morning”.
Romans 8:28“And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose”.
2 Corinthians 5:17“Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come: The old has gone, the new is here!”.
Hebrews 13:8“Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever”.
Malachi 3:6“I the Lord do not change. So you, the descendants of Jacob, are not destroyed”.
James 1:17“Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows”.
Ephesians 4:22-24“You were taught, with regard to your former way of life, to put off your old self, which is being corrupted by its deceitful desires; to be made new in the attitude of your minds; and to put on the new self, created to be like God in true righteousness and holiness”.
Do lazy days make you feel rested or unproductive?
Hello to you. Hope this finds you well. God has been at the wheel of the stuff I’ve been going through lately – extremely grateful for the prayers of family, friends and even strangers! My Aunt met a elderly veteran who gave her this cross for me and said he would pray for me. The wagons of Gods people have been rallied! I’m so, so grateful!
I don’t usually wear crosses because of what they represent – the murder of an innocent man but understand what it means in Christianity.
When I think of todays prompt I think of my life right now gradually getting in place. It’s taken me three years to get where I’m at. Many of the days leading up to this one were littered with fear, sadness and grief – lack of faith! A lot of my days have not very productive and could be perceived as lazy days. I was in such a state of shock leaving Texas. I have been retired from active duty longer than I was in (21 years). When I was active duty I burned the candle at both ends. I was usually the one leadership turned to when a program was a mess. I worked a lot of long days cleaning up messes. Lazy days meant more to me then they do now. I don’t have a specific purpose when I wake up each day! When I was active duty I was up at 4:30 am and worked til after 5.
I haven’t completely found a fit for me here yet in being useful again. A lot of what holds me back is driving. I hate driving! When I was married, Kyle used to always drive and I got used to that after 12 years! I was spoiled! I keep my eyes open for things I can do – little things. When my back is not hurting I would like to help set up at the church again. I don’t want to feel like I’m wasting the gift of my life. A lot of people I’ve known haven’t even lived as long as I have.
One of my favorite passages from the Bible – makes me think of a Palladian (class I played in FFXI video game). In these trying times we must put on our armor!
Ephesians 6:10-13New International Version
The Armor of God
10 Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. 11 Put on the full armor of God, so that you can take your stand against the devil’s schemes. 12 For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. 13 Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand.
Hello to you today. How are you? This morning was our prayer group and we had five of us. We each brought forth our own prayer needs and the needs of those within and outside of our church. There is power in prayer! We hope to speak positive energies into what seems like attacks on members of the church. A lot of people are struggling with sickness and mourning loss of friends and family members. It’s possible to make a foothold for the enemy in resentment and the lower energy vibrations of grief and sorrow.
Psalm 30:5New International Version
5 For his anger lasts only a moment, but his favor lasts a lifetime; weeping may stay for the night, but rejoicing comes in the morning.
Hello to you. I’m just back from Grace House where we have a prayer meeting each Thursday at 9:30 am. Today it was Lois, Brie and me. We are hoping that may be this fall our group will grow some. I walked over and back. My lower back wasn’t happy but the prayers helped. I have been having some vertigo/swaying spells the past couple of days. I hope this isn’t a side effect of the new medication I’m on! We prayed for my Aunt and Dad too. Just found out my Aunt is having shoulder surgery later this month.
So bedtime and getting up are something I’ve been having to work on. I try to start going to bed at 9 pm and I usually wake up around 8-9 am. It takes me a long time to fall asleep and I don’t like getting out of bed right away. I think the reason I have trouble falling asleep has to do with being on screens before bed time. Last night I didn’t have anything on after lights out and I don’t remember falling asleep! Just takes good practice and consistency I think.
Today was good because I needed to be up early to go to the prayer meeting. It’s good to have a reason to get up and have something to look forward to.
Saw this on the way home yesterday Saw this on walk this morning Such tiny little flowers ! This looks like a perfect flower for hummingbirds For some reason he wanted on my lap!
Psalm 4:8New International Version
8 In peace I will lie down and sleep, for you alone, Lord, make me dwell in safety.
Do you have a quote you live your life by or think of often?
Hello to you. Just back from a short walk with Link. Today began with a nice prayer meeting at Grace House. It was three of us and very productive. A focus was given to the recent deaths associated with Middleton to include two suicides and we also focused on a future home for our church. Lois had a good idea about rather than building new churches that like Christian churches share facilities. Pastor Jason’s idea was like have Church Middleton with different campuses. So much money gets used up for buildings and then there is less left over for ministries to help people. Another point of emphasis was more volunteers to help with different parts of the church. It’s usually the same people who do most of the heavy lifting! I wish I could do more but I just can’t – physically mostly. I get so tired. I walked over there and back and felt so sore. My back hasn’t been right since the fall this winter.
Todays prompt is about a quote I think of and live by often. I have several. One is lead by example and another is where you go there you are. I feel it’s important to be a positive example in the world – action speaks louder than words. These past couple of years have been hard for me because I don’t feel like I have done enough. I haven’t been a very good example. The family and friends that surround me are great at leading by example. I just haven’t had the energy to be the leader I used to be. So I am doing what I can. Being a part of the prayer team is a little something I am able to do.
The other quote or saying kind of ties with the first. You can’t escape yourself – where you go there you are. Just because you move to a new location doesn’t mean your not the same you in the new location. You bring you along to the new place. Since moving here from Texas I did that. There have been some changes but those changes have been to my health. This Mal debarque Syndrome makes me so tired. I didn’t have the swaying motion in my head when I walked in Texas.
Matthew 18:20New International Version
20 For where two or three gather in my name, there am I with them.”
Some sights on my walk yesterday and back from the prayer meeting this morning
Hello to you. Hope this finds you well! This morning I decided to join others from church for a prayer meeting. They had only expected four people and my going made five! One of the things we prayed for I’ve had on my heart for quite some time and that’s a permanent home for our church. As it stands right now, each Saturday volunteers have to set up for Sunday at a school gym here in town. After service they have to pack everything up. It’s very labor intensive. God will make a way for us I hope.
Tree buds – love the flowers Alleluia clouds Prayer meeting at Grace House We prayed for volunteers to plant flowers – looks like nature and God already on it!The tree leaf buds in morning light
One of the unspoken obstacles we are facing as a Christian church is we are trying to operate in a predominately Mormon town. Everything will work out I hope!
Matthew 6:5-15
Prayer
5 “And when you pray, do not be like the hypocrites, for they love to pray standing in the synagogues and on the street corners to be seen by others. Truly I tell you, they have received their reward in full. 6 But when you pray, go into your room, close the door and pray to your Father, who is unseen. Then your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you.7 And when you pray, do not keep on babblinglike pagans, for they think they will be heard because of their many words. 8 Do not be like them, for your Father knows what you needbefore you ask him.
9 “This, then, is how you should pray:
“‘Our Father in heaven, hallowed be your name, 10 your kingdom come, your will be done, on earth as it is in heaven. 11 Give us today our daily bread. 12 And forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors. 13 And lead us not into temptation,[a] but deliver us from the evil one.[b]’14 For if you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. 15 But if you do not forgive others their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins.
Hello to you . How are you today? My thoughts turn to belief today. I want to believe in the healing power of God over what I’ve got going on physically and psychologically. I want to believe God is healing me and restoring me to my self. Half of the battle in healing is just that I think. People can pray for us but if we don’t believe the change can’t occur.
Thank you for your kind words and prayers of support – I believe they are helping!
For a long time , most of my life, I have loved God. As I have matured and learned so much about matters of organic energy and matters of the spirit I have learned through personal experience how important it is to have s personal relationship. A relationship no one outside of myself can define. No book or written word. Sometimes just the sound of aspen leaves blowing in the wind. Always present. Recently I made a choice I had been straddling the fence about for many years. I decided to surrender my soul to Jesus Christ….not in the book but the one I have come to know through a personal relationship. In the sky, God and the Earth my mother…our shared mother and once they made a son. I don’t believe he left such is not the way of this system as I understand it. Too many words. Human beings trying to make sense of things as they had understanding at the time. Words of the time that have changed in ours. So many translations. So many individual perceptions. We are in the one circle. Sometimes mythology is our only comfort in times of great loss and confusion.