25 August 2021 Balance

Hello! How are you today ? I am under a blanket as I write to you . It’s in the 50’s this morning!

Something that has been on my mind is balance . How delicate it is. If I eat too much sugar. If I drink too much caffeine. If I don’t get enough sleep. If I get too little exercise. If I watch too much tv. All of these things and more can offset “the apple art” that is my existence . I find as I get older my body is even more sensitive and it can be frustrating!

18 August 2021 Rested

Hello to you . How are you ? Are you feeling rested? I hope so. Lately I have been feeling like a SIMS video game character that just can’t get my energy bar to full! There was a cheat you could used called a Rejuvenator. All you had to was put your SIM in it for a few seconds and all the bars reset. Some days I wish that was real! There is such a fine balance between protein, sugars and sleep.

Drawing for today

7 August 2019 “Being there”

Hello to you.  I’ve been away for quite awhile again.  Lately there have been many things going on in my life that have required my attention on a personal, physical, emotional and spirit level while I am trying to heal from a recent fall.  I won’t burden you with the details.  This morning my husband and I can’t sleep again even with it being quiet and dark.  A lot on our minds, bodies and spirits these days.  I believe it is in our house and outside of our houses that affect us on every level – directly and indirectly by the very nature of how our systems are connected as living organisms.

One of the things on my mind right now is how to be there for my family and my friends and still have something left for me.  In my current condition I am not able to be there for those I love in the same capacity I have been able to in the past and I kind of beat myself up for it!  Am I being a bad friend?  A bad daughter?  A bad wife?  Then comes the “shouldn’ing” all over myself which doesn’t help!   So I ran a couple things to share with those of you who this might resonate with – those who might be feeling/going through this right now and have need of a different way to see it:

“Being there” = 93/98/91/76/117/133/146

9 = 42 = self  (a “no” self as 5 also equals 42 but I think of this as the feeling/five senses/physical self) 3 = 56 = 42/52  (“self earth”)

98 = together  91= spirit  76 = humans  33= the  46 = body

Being there for a friend = 189

1=34 =one  8=49=alive  9=42=self (add 34 + 49 + 42 = 125 and 25 = all, “a all” = 26 which = God)

Sometimes we can’t be there like we want to for a friend or how a friend might expect us to be so we can pray for them to the God/Gods of our understanding.  If you don’t like that – just even having a loving/positive thought for them.  It is different for each of us.  Sometimes we just can’t be there for someone like they think they want or need from us.  An energy greater than ourselves must step in our place for them.  For many, that is God.

Being there for family = 198

1=34=one  9=42=self 8=49=alive (add 34 + 42 + 49 = 125)

Being there for yourself = 253

2=58=feeling  5=42=self  3=56=light  (add 58 + 42 + 56 = 156) (56’s I have found, why, light out and there are more but these are a couple)

156/128/141/128/141…. = a why a man a garbage?  a why a man energy exchange.

For me personally, for the past several months, years…may be most of my life I have questioned my worth, my value….am I garbage?  Did God make a mistake by making me?  What I have had to do is find a way to make peace within myself so I don’t hate myself all the time.  People like my husband, family, my friends all seem to love and care about me but if I don’t love myself, their energies are wasted on me.  One of the hardest things I’ve ever done, still do, is tell the person in the mirror I love them.

As I age, that girl looking back at me has changed but when I look in her eyes, that little girl is still looking back at me and I can’t stop loving her.  The God I know has changed through the years – stripped down now to energetic form.  Why would God expend all that energy to make something and not love it?  The human world is full now of creations cast aside, seeming mistakes.  Are they really mistakes if God is in all of us?  Made all of us?  Who decides but God?!  These are the questions of our time.

We have all been given a set of clothes to wear in this life and underneath them is energy, children of God.  Sometimes our inner child gets lost and just wants to be comforted.  We cast about in this world to get some relief from the pain that child may be enduring and we can’t find it!  I have gone through that process so many times in my life and it was due in great part to a black, white and tan cocker spaniel named Sam that I found out nothing can fill the void that is created by loss but God.  Isn’t it ironic that God turned around is dog.  Yes, people living and dead in my life have taught me a great deal of life but with Sam there were no conditions.

I will close for now.  I am typing one-handed so can’t do this so often.  I hope something here is what you were looking for and or needed today.