30 May 2021 Memorial

Hello to you, how are you? It’s hard to believe it’s already been a year since the last Memorial Day….how quickly does time go as I get older. I miss the family I spent the last Memorial Day with in Texas but God has provided me with loving family in my here and now. There is great symbolism in Memorial Day. It symbolizes for me both endings and beginnings. I am still mourning my losses and probably always will on some level or another. Do we ever truly forget those we love? Once a name has been etched on heart does it ever completely fade? I say no.

memorial day ” in the English Ordinal system equals 116

25 May 2020 Beth Tim Kyle and Cole

18 May 2021 Staying Positive

Hello to you, how are you ? I hope this finds you well. Today I had to exercise my staying positive muscles . I believe that what you focus on gains power. So I have been trying to make a conscious effort to focus on the good in my life versus where my life is lacking . I am applying this train of thought in what I think, speak and write.

Let’s see what staying positive is in the numbers:

Staying positive in the English ordinal system is 210 -light and shadow process for one against the unknown

15 May 2021 Healing

Hello to you! How are you ?! I hope this finds you well. I am doing better after what happened . I’m just taking it one day at a time. Sometimes things happen to us to make us stronger even though it doesn’t seem like it at the time . I think God knows my heart. God knows I am still healing from the divorce. God knows it’s nearly impossible to just put someone in such a vast void. True love takes time! True love for me will take lots of healing and time . God is working on it !

Healing in the English ordinal system equals 56 – a all senses all vices in check but one experience

27 April 2021 Habit, Process and Feeling

Hello to you how are you doing? I’m trying something different and using the WordPress app to write to you today .

My friend and I were talking about his pot smoking habit. That’s why the title! He was talking about the process and how it’s soothing for him. He goes and gets the pot, rolls his blunts and then smokes it. Then he gets the munchies and has something to eat . Then he gets sleepy and takes a nap .

When one doesn’t have anything to do we sometimes adopt unhealthy rituals to fill the void of time. My friends addiction ,as he now was calls it , is really a habit with a process and ultimately a feeling…..it’s something to do. He wants to quit but isn’t sure what to put in its place . I almost think of pot smoking like drinking coffee. Preparing a cup of coffee to drink is very much a habit, I call it the “dark ritual.”

Habit process feeling in English ordinal 193 -one no yes, no, May be process

19 April 2021 The Wind

Hello to you, how are you? I am doing pretty good today. The wind has been blowing something fierce this morning. I wonder what God is talking about today:

Psalm 104:4New International Version

He makes winds his messengers,[a]
    flames of fire his servants.

Sometimes when I hear the wind through the trees I wonder what it is they are talking about. I wonder if it’s like going to the hair dresser and being under a fan getting your hair to set. “Did you see Weeping Willow down the street?! I wonder how long she’s going to let her hair grow out?!”

Sometimes the wind is scary if it blows too hard….is that a fight?! Lets see what the wind is in the numbers:

balance” in the English Ordinal system equals 38

the wind” in the English Ordinal system equals 83 (eternal yes, no, may be)

16 April 2021 Home

Hello to you, how are you? It’s a beautiful sunny Friday afternoon here as I write to you. The topic that has come up for me today is home, “where is my home?” They say home is where your heart is so I am left asking where is my heart? Well yesterday when I really started thinking about this question, I looked down and I saw Link! Link is 6 years old and has been with me through some of the hardest parts of the storm I’ve been in. When I say I have to go home nowadays I am thinking of Link…”I have to get home to Link.” I’m kind of afraid to get too close to him. What if he leaves me too? What will I have left? I guess I shouldn’t be thinking like that and stay in the moment but it’s hard.

Some day I hope to have a two legged someone in addition to Link to share my life with and home will be redefined once again.

Psalm 84:3-4New International Version

Even the sparrow has found a home,
    and the swallow a nest for herself,
    where she may have her young—
a place near your altar,
    Lord Almighty, my King and my God.
Blessed are those who dwell in your house;
    they are ever praising you.[a]

22 May 2020 Link

woman” in the English Ordinal system equals 66

happy” in the English Ordinal system equals 66

where is my home?” in the English Ordinal system equals 166

cat” in the English Ordinal system equals 24

home is where the heart is” in the English Ordinal system equals 241

13 April 2021 Prospers

Hello to you. How are you?

I want to be this kind of person:

Psalm 1

Blessed is the one
    who does not walk in step with the wicked
or stand in the way that sinners take
    or sit in the company of mockers,
but whose delight is in the law of the Lord,
    and who meditates on his law day and night.
3 That person is like a tree planted by streams of water,
    which yields its fruit in season
and whose leaf does not wither—
    whatever they do prospers.

In the life of a person like me, sometimes it’s hard to muster enough energy and courage to do the things that need to get done. Today was one of those days. It’s like my body physically resists any effort I make to be productive. So I have to force myself to do things otherwise they don’t get done.

I have to mention here that I never used to be this sort of person! I used to clean everything compulsively. If something needed to be done I got it done. Now a lot of times I find myself asking “what’s the point?” I have come to realize a lot of tasks we do in this life are futile in nature. Like for examples laundry, getting groceries, ironing and shoveling snow. I really want to get back to some sort of balance with all of this!

God” in the English Ordinal system equals 26

prospers” in the English Ordinal system equals 126

Schmidt” in the English Ordinal system equals 76

the futile tasks” in the English Ordinal system equals 176

12 April 2021 Keeping your word

Hello, how are you? It’s a sunny Monday afternoon. I am still waiting on the people I contacted to come and spray the weeds and grass growing in my gavel.

I think it’s important in business or in your personal life that if you make a promise about something that you keep your word.

lie” in the English Ordinal system equals 26

keeping your word” in the English Ordinal system equals 206

Not much to write about today but wanted to say hello!

11 April 2021 Thoughts

Hello, how are you? I am doing well as I write to you late this sunny Sunday afternoon. The past few days I have been trying to pay more close attention to my thoughts and how they are associated with my feelings. This passage resonated:

Isaiah 55:8-11New International Version

“For my thoughts are not your thoughts,
    neither are your ways my ways,”
declares the Lord.
“As the heavens are higher than the earth,
    so are my ways higher than your ways
    and my thoughts than your thoughts.
10 As the rain and the snow
    come down from heaven,
and do not return to it
    without watering the earth
and making it bud and flourish,
    so that it yields seed for the sower and bread for the eater,
11 so is my word that goes out from my mouth:
    It will not return to me empty,
but will accomplish what I desire
    and achieve the purpose for which I sent it.

As an empath, I have lived most of my life as a “feeler.” This past year living like that has been very difficult for me. To feel every little thing so deeply riddled me with anxiety and paralyzed me with fear.

With the help of God through friends and family I am learning to find a balance between my thoughts and the feelings those thoughts evoke. A couple simple phrases when I think something and feel anxious is, “it’s just a thought” or “it’s just a feeling” or “This is just a feeling it will pass it always does.”

I am gradually learning to take control of my thoughts and how I choose to feel about those thoughts. I learned about this from the program I mentioned in my previous blog. In some ways anxiety is just a bad habit that can be broken. So gradually, over time, I hope to reprogram myself and get back to some semblance of who I used to be.

thoughts” in the English Ordinal system equals 118 (two parts of one in eternity)

10 April 2021 Normalcy

Hello to you, how are you? I’m doing ok. Today’s topic is courtesy of a friend as she is struggling, like many of us are, to define what her new normal is. So much of what we used to do without thinking about it has changed. Like I heard from my cousin that her daughter had to schedule a spot to visit the zoo! We used to be able to just go and visit the zoo. We used to be able to just go shopping, eat out , get a haircut , go to a movie and various other things without a second thought. Now we have to find out if places are open and if they are open what are their procedures for being open.

I honestly don’t think things will ever be the way they were before this pandemic happened. Part of me is wondering if the pandemic has given us a new reverence for “normal” when we can have it. May be we don’t take things for granted as much.

Normalcy” in the English Ordinal system equals 101 (one unknown person, place or thing to one) I look at this being like a two blacksmiths at an anvil working on one piece of metal.