Category: drawing

30 July 2026 Reason

by saymber, posted in Bipolar life, drawing, history, Home, Mental Health, Nature, Spirituality and Religion, Veteran Affairs

Do you think everything happens for a reason?

Hello to you. It’s another smoky and hazy day as I write to you. I’m getting a bit of cabin fever staying inside so much. We stay inside for the winter and stay inside for the summer! it feels like the whole earth is burning.

Do I think everything happens for a reason? The way I’ve come to understand how things work is this existence is like a chess match. Every move of a piece is carefully thought out. Our Lord knows where every single fragment of this existence is going to go. Each move carefully thought out. To answer a single prayer requires the movement of so many pieces. The Lord has all the time in world – he operates in infinity. One day in our time is forever in his. He exists outside of time whereas our mortal coil is limited by time and circumstances.

I can remember sitting out in my back yard in Texas and I would point at a dead leaf or a blade of grass. I would ask “what are you going to do with this,” and then a breeze would come and move the leaf or blade of grass. Sometimes an insect would land on it. I came to understand that God had a plan for everything in creation – even things that seemed to not be of use anymore.

Sometimes things happen in this shared existence that seem to make no sense at the moment. It’s only when enough time passes that we see the purpose. We can often look back and see Gods plan and have an “aha” moment. We are able to see what happened that seemed horrible while we were living in it was actually for our greater good. If my second husband had not divorced me, I would not have the relationship I have with God, my family and church. At the time I was going through the divorce I wasn’t sure I would make it!

https://youtu.be/HuV2ID4PVgA?is=IM4tOhSr-2uwiQNL – Enigma – Why

Spin of the World Prayer Wheel:

I would say to young people 
a number of things, and I have only one minute.

I would say — let them remember
that there is a meaning beyond absurdity.

Let them be sure that every little deed counts,
that every word has power,
and that we do — everyone — our share
to redeem the world, in spite of all absurdities,
and all the frustrations, and all the disappointment

And above all, remember that the meaning of life
is to live life as if it were a work of art.

rabbi abraham joshua heschel – 1972

28 July 2026 Surrender

by saymber, posted in Art and Poetry, Bipolar life, drawing, Health, Mental Health, Spirituality and Religion, Veteran Affairs

Hello there. As I write today is another smoky and hazy day. I haven’t done any walks because of the conditions. After I write this I am going to try and do a 20 min Tai Chi session on YouTube with Don Fiore.

I had a therapy session today and we ended with Alyssa giving me a challenge. She asked me to do a drawing of what surrender looks like for me now. The last big surrender was when I was still married to Ken and lived in Florida. When I turned myself into the care of God, the doors of freedom and recovery flew open.

Here is an abbreviated version of what happened. While stationed in Colorado and then Florida I had started abusing alcohol. One day, in Florida, I met a man who was a broker, can’t remember his name, but he was striking. He was a black man with incredibly blue eyes. He asked me if I had a church home and I said no. He invited me to his mega non- denominational church. I went and the message was about the Holy Spirit being an actual person. The next day I was on my patio drunk and miserable. I simply said “I surrender.” The very next day the Holy Spirit began his work on me. I rode my bike to work and was going to go even with a hangover. As I was getting ready to go I watched the chain on my bike fall off in slow motion. I fixed the chain but was running late now to get to work. I was riding in front of where Ken used to work and all the sudden a Transam about ran me over. I was really shook up now! Had I been there a few seconds earlier I would have been hit!

When I got to work I remembered I had my annual physical exam so I left again. At the appointment there was a questionnaire and alcohol use was one of the questions. I had the courage to be honest. Because I was honest, within a couple days I was in rehab in Maryland! At first Ken and I were mad because we didn’t think I was an alcoholic. Later I realized it was to get the alcohol out of my system to see what was really going on. There is much more to my story of this surrender – let’s just say when the Holy Spirit is in charge nothing is impossible!

I feel like I’ve been doing what God wants me to do right now. My physical conditions prevent me from over doing it like I used to do. What would happen if I surrendered again? Would I be healed so I could be a worthy vessel of the Holy Spirit or how I am now is forever? This drawing is how I view Surrender right now:

Putting to crude drawing what Surrender looks like today

Spin of the World Prayer Wheel:

Let my heart be the vessel of God’s Love.

Let my thoughts be the blossom of God’s Love.

Let my words be the expression of God’s Love.

Let my actions be the fulfillment of God’s Love.

willingness – david ridge

22 July 2026 All That I Have

by saymber, posted in Art and Poetry, Bipolar life, drawing, Spirituality and Religion

Hello to you. It’s evening as I write to you. How are you? I hope this finds you well and if not I want you to know you’re not alone. You are loved unconditionally.

Today I found this post on Tik Tok that is so simple but profound at the same time:

I had to draw it myself:

I just had to try my hand at drawing this profound and simple message!

My heart is all Jesus wants! It’s not complicated even though I sometimes make it so.

Spin of the World Prayer Wheel:

Walk softly upon the earth.
May its beauty forever surround you,
its wonders forever astound you.

May its wisdom delight you,
its music invite you
to dance and to play and to sing.

May you love and be loved by all that you meet;
may you know and practice compassion.

Rejoice in the earth and in all of creation.
Rejoice in life.

a parting blessing – alfred v. fedak – 2008

21 July 2026 Practice

by saymber, posted in Art and Poetry, drawing, history, Mental Health, Spirituality and Religion

Hello there! How are you doing today? I just finished another attempt at drawing one of my favorite things the Metatrons Cube. I did it mostly free hand. I am so out of practice!

My first attempt at drawing a Metatrons Cube in a couple of years
What the correct shape looks like

What exactly is the meaning of the shape? Here is what the internet had to say:

Metatron’s Cube is a complex, mystical geometric symbol in sacred geometry that contains all the fundamental shapes of the universe. Named after the Archangel Metatron, who is said to oversee the flow of energy in creation, it is believed to be the ultimate blueprint of reality and physical matter. [1, 2, 3]

Here are the key elements of its meaning:

  • The Blueprint of Creation: The cube is derived from ancient patterns like the “Fruit of Life” (13 interconnected circles). By drawing straight lines connecting the center of every circle to every other circle, it reveals the Five Platonic Solids (the tetrahedron, hexahedron, octahedron, dodecahedron, and icosahedron). These solids represent the basic building blocks of all organic life and matter. [1, 2, 3]
  • Balance and Harmony: Metatron’s Cube merges the feminine (the curved circles) with the masculine (the straight lines). In spiritual practices, this represents the perfect balance of polarities and the harmony of the cosmos. [1, 2, 3, 4, 5]
  • Protection and Healing: Historically, the cube has been used as a sacred grid or glyph. Believers often use or wear it to repel lower frequencies, clear negative energy, and foster a peaceful environment. [1, 2, 3]
  • Spiritual Awakening: As a visual tool, it is frequently used in meditation to help focus the mind, gain higher consciousness, and connect with the divine. [1]

I first learned about the shape from my friend Sarah many years ago. Something about it just was a balm for my brain. I have a pendant I wear with the shape all the time.

Spin of the World Prayer Wheel:

God,

I’m willing
to do your work.

Please
show me what it is.

tami simon

19 July 2026 The Greatest Prayer

by saymber, posted in Art and Poetry, Bipolar life, drawing, history, Mental Health, Music, Spirituality and Religion

Hello to you. Today has been a good day. The morning began with church. I had never really read John 17 before. It was a great prayer from Jesus for his followers then and his followers now. I got to sit next to my friend Jeannie. She brought me something special – colored pencils! She likes my drawings and wanted to encourage me. I did a little drawing – I’m so out of practice!

Wonderful gift
Me trying to put into a drawing my feelings for my friend

https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=John%2017&version=NIV – John 17

https://youtu.be/wagJfhhi0_Q?is=90djIWlIo3yVbZEe – The Greatest Prayer – Pastor Jason Boyd

https://youtu.be/6CKCThJB5w0?is=jCQcVyPBLETX94vM – Here I Am To Worship – The Call – Hillsong Worship

Spin of the World Prayer Wheel:

At the center of the universe is a
loving heart that continues to beat
and that wants the best for every person.

Anything we can do to help foster
the intellect and spirit and emotional growth
of our fellow human beings, that is our job.

Those of us who have this particular vision
must continue against all odds.

Life is for service.

mister rogers neighborhood – fred rogers – 1928-2003

25 May 2025 Remembering

by saymber, posted in drawing, history, Home, human rights, In the News, Leading Life by Example, Mental Health, Veteran Affairs

Hello to you. I hope this finds you well from where you are visiting me here. Today is Memorial Day here in the US and my deceased birth mom’s 84 birthday.

Drawing I did of my mom Jeannie many years ago

My thoughts and prayers go out to all the family and friends of those who have fought and died for their country. In addition to that my thoughts turn to those who have fought and lost the battle with mental illness. My mom Jeannie, at the age of 26 is such a person. I was afraid for much of my early life that I wasn’t going to live past 26 – end up just like my mom. I am now 58 – well beyond my fears!

One of the most special memories I have of celebrating Memorial Day is with my exes family going to Arlington National Cemetery. My exes dad and his family played taps at exactly 3 pm at different corners of the cemetery:

https://youtu.be/nhxxOvdM1SE?si=yj7rOt0BimzB6M98 – Taps – We share a Memorial Day tribute, courtesy of the U.S. Air Force Band. It features a bugler from The Ceremonial Brass performing Taps at Culpeper National Cemetery in Virginia

Taps for Veterans Every Memorial Day at 3:00 PM local time, Americans from coast to coast pause to honor those who gave their lives in service to our country.

I nearly lost it seeing so many graves. There were several new graves. The ages of those fallen were my age and younger. Gone too soon!

29 Apr 2026 Full Moon and Healing

by saymber, posted in animals, Bipolar life, drawing, Health, Music, photography, Spirituality and Religion, Writing and blogging
I am a bit rusty at drawing but gave it a try tonight
Beautiful moon out tonight

Hello to you. As I write to you the moon is beaming brightly outside. I got out my little sketchbook tonight and did the drawing I’m sharing. It’s me imagining Jesus, the Holy Spirit and Metatron healing my ears. The nasal spray and antihistamine that was prescribed isn’t helping me get rid of the problem with my ears. I don’t want to lose hope that there is some way for me to be healed! My body has been through it and now as I age it’s all catching up to me.

Tonight I am saying a special prayer for my cousin and his wife as their 16 year old dachshund Lincoln passed away today. My heart goes out to them!

General Healing Prayer: “Lord, I know You are able to heal me in every way I need healing—mentally, emotionally, spiritually, physically… And I know it is Your will to heal me, because Your son Jesus died so I could be healed.”

One of my favorite songs:

https://youtu.be/6wcR_X_GEE8?si=PUFkcE530XK-v0Va – VNV Nation – Nova

“Nova”

I long to feel my heart burned open wide, til nothing else remains
Except the fires from which I came
Like parted souls, divided for an age, awe and wonder I’d embrace
And the world anew again
But now, this picture from me fades
From still’s cold hand there’s no reprieve, light the fire in me

Shine, shine your light on me
Illuminate me, make me complete
Lay me down, and wash this world from me
Open the skies, and burn it all away
‘Cause I’ve been waiting, all my life just waiting
For you to shine, shine your light on me

I dreamed the world, with my eyes open
But time moved on and then, new worlds begin again
Oh my heart, in this universe so vast
No moment was made to last, so light the fire in me

Shine, shine your light on me
Illuminate me, make me complete
Please shine, shine your light on me
No hesitation, make me complete

Lay me down, and wash this world from me
Open the skies, and burn it all away
‘Cause I’ve been waiting, all my life just waiting
For you to shine, shine your light on me

Lay me down, and wash this world from me
Open the skies, and burn it all away
‘Cause I’ve been waiting, all my life
Forever waiting, shine your light on me

‘Cause I’ve been waiting, all my life just waiting
For you to shine, shine your light on me

16 Dec 2025 Joe The Uninvited Guest

by saymber, posted in Bipolar life, drawing, Health, Leading Life by Example, Mental Health, Spirituality and Religion, Veteran Affairs

Hello to you. It’s early afternoon as I write to you after my therapy session through the VA. I am blessed to have a really good therapist. Today we talked about how my physical symptoms affect my life. She came up with something that resonated with me. She said imagine you are hosting a party and your neighbor Joe shows up. He isn’t the most pleasant smelling or behaving person. He is the uninvited guest that you have to keep tabs on the whole party so he doesn’t ruin it. She likened what’s going on with my head and lower back pain to Joe. If I focus on these things like I would focus on Joe, the party will always be ruined for me. I have to find a way to not let these thorns to my life stop me from living my best life.

Are you struggling with some kind of physical and or mental condition that won’t go away? What will you do with your Joe?! As for me, I’m seriously considering whether Joe ever gets invited in the first place! 😂

Oh how I wish Jesus would heal me and all those I do and do not know! It must have been amazing to be healed by him:

Matthew 4:23New International Version

Jesus Heals the Sick

23 Jesus went throughout Galilee, teaching in their synagogues, proclaiming the good news of the kingdom, and healing every disease and sickness among the people.

Drawing I did of my birth mom Jeannie many years ago

10 Feb 2025 Outgrown

by saymber, posted in Art and Poetry, Bipolar life, drawing, Mental Health, Movies, Music, Spirituality and Religion, Television, Veteran Affairs, Writing and blogging

Are there any activities or hobbies you’ve outgrown or lost interest in over time?

Hello to you! How are you? I hope this finds you well in your life. In answer to today’s prompt I would have to say that drawing and writing poetry are things I seldom do anymore. I used to spend hours drawing and writing poems came to me very easily. With the medication I’m on to treat Bipolar, Depakote, I am blocked from doing these things. If I do attempt to do them it’s forced and just not very good! I miss being creative in those ways but would rather have my sanity!

I watched this scene from the first season of The Chosen the other night and it brought me to tears:

https://youtu.be/UI-PehitKKU?si=7fT_XBegSgOk10oC – The Chosen Jesus Heals Mary

I found myself thinking about what an amazing thing it must have been to be healed by Jesus. To have him put his hands around my head and look me in my eyes – for him to know me by name! This is the part of me longing for a tangible God! I often think why people don’t follow Jesus is because he isn’t here on earth – tangible. Hollywood movie stars and musicians often fill the void only meant for Jesus – they can be seen, touched and heard. Think of the craze Elvis and The Beatles caused in their day! Right now Jonathan Roumie is doing a fine job of filling the role of Jesus and he takes it very seriously but has said more than once he is not Jesus Christ no matter how much fans want him to be him. He is a servant. His portrayal of Jesus has helped me more than once. It was him I turned to a 4th of July a couple years ago when I was nearly driven to run out of my house and yell at neighbors lighting fireworks all around me. Jesus wasn’t with me tangibly but one of his servants, Jonathan, was when I was calm enough to seek him out. Someday Jesus will tangibly reveal himself to the world and I might not live to see it. I will hopefully see him in heaven if I don’t get to meet him here on earth.

Mark 16:9New International Version

[The earliest manuscripts and some other ancient witnesses do not have verses 9–20.]

9 When Jesus rose early on the first day of the week, he appeared first to Mary Magdalene, out of whom he had driven seven demons.

4 Dec 2024 Five Things

by saymber, posted in Bipolar life, drawing, In the News, Spirituality and Religion, Television, Veteran Affairs

Share five things you’re good at.

Good evening to you. Hope you had a good day. Today was another day of inversion – a frosty fog everywhere. Link and I still got out for our walk. I was going to stay in but decided we needed to go. I’m feeling better thankfully so no excuses!

I was watching a live streamer, Daniel Cruz, who was trying to take us to see the Rockefeller Square tree lighting tonight but it was taking too long and his phone battery was low. He wasn’t going to wait til 10 pm in freezing cold temperatures! So late for such a thing – especially families with kids! I’ll tune into the NBC live later to see it.

I really enjoy live streamers. I get to live vicariously through them ! Just today I was on the Celebration cruise ship, visited Ireland and New York. Tik tok is a good platform for live streamers and people like me that are interested in seeing other parts of the world without actually going there myself!

So five things that I’m good at: 1)writing 2)singing 3)dancing 4)baking 5)taking pictures not necessarily in that order but those things came to mind! Something else that I have done that I wasn’t too bad at was drawing and painting t-shirts by hand.

One of my favorites – don’t know what happened to it!

As we near Christmas its a good time to reflect on Jesus’s origin story:

Matthew 1:18-25New International Version

Joseph Accepts Jesus as His Son

18 This is how the birth of Jesus the Messiah came about[a]: His mother Mary was pledged to be married to Joseph, but before they came together, she was found to be pregnant through the Holy Spirit.19 Because Joseph her husband was faithful to the law, and yet[b] did not want to expose her to public disgrace, he had in mind to divorce her quietly.

20 But after he had considered this, an angel of the Lord appeared to him in a dream and said, “Joseph son of David, do not be afraid to take Mary home as your wife, because what is conceived in her is from the Holy Spirit. 21 She will give birth to a son, and you are to give him the name Jesus,[c] because he will save his people from their sins.”

22 All this took place to fulfill what the Lord had said through the prophet: 23 “The virgin will conceive and give birth to a son, and they will call him Immanuel”[d](which means “God with us”).

24 When Joseph woke up, he did what the angel of the Lord had commanded him and took Mary home as his wife. 25 But he did not consummate their marriage until she gave birth to a son. And he gave him the name Jesus.