Hello to you . Hope this finds you well. I’m struggling with creativity and medication. I’ve found that when I am on strong medication I can’t think as clearly as I normally can. My drawing and writing skills are impaired. I am having to choose between mania and sedation I guess. I choose reality – sanity and if that means sedation then that’s what has to happen.
These are some of my drawings. The glory, the “payment” goes to God.
https://youtu.be/ND-nldJc8kU – How Do We Forgive Our Fathers – Smoke Signals
For a long time , most of my life, I have loved God. As I have matured and learned so much about matters of organic energy and matters of the spirit I have learned through personal experience how important it is to have s personal relationship. A relationship no one outside of myself can define. No book or written word. Sometimes just the sound of aspen leaves blowing in the wind. Always present. Recently I made a choice I had been straddling the fence about for many years. I decided to surrender my soul to Jesus Christ….not in the book but the one I have come to know through a personal relationship. In the sky, God and the Earth my mother…our shared mother and once they made a son. I don’t believe he left such is not the way of this system as I understand it. Too many words. Human beings trying to make sense of things as they had understanding at the time. Words of the time that have changed in ours. So many translations. So many individual perceptions. We are in the one circle. Sometimes mythology is our only comfort in times of great loss and confusion.
“Two halves of one whole.”
https://youtu.be/xFtgj2m_Mk4 – Control Mind in a box
https://youtu.be/GWZYoWxVMDk – The Chosen Sermon on the Mount
This morning I had an interesting dream. There was a woman I had a conflict with and she got so angry with me. We exchanged words and I thought that was it but then she started to slap my face faster than is even humanly possible. She was so angry! But I stood still and let her do it until finally she stopped. To me this was biblical. No matter what was going on, I stood my ground and didn’t retaliate against her. Something she did not expect me to do.
38 “You have heard that it was said, ‘Eye for eye, and tooth for tooth.’[a](A) 39 But I tell you, do not resist an evil person. If anyone slaps you on the right cheek, turn to them the other cheek also.(B) 40 And if anyone wants to sue you and take your shirt, hand over your coat as well.
When I was growing up my Mom used to get very angry with me. I don’t want to go into it out of respect for her. She used to get so mad at me she would “see red.” I had to, later, learn to empathize with why she may have done some things she did AND because of those things she made me a survivor. She had a lot that made her the way she was and that influenced who I was but at the end of the day I had a choice. I could choose to not forgive her and lose the only Mom God gave me or forgive and not waste any more time feeding darkness that comes of it.
Imagine waiting nearly a whole life time to hear your father tell you he loved you……as I recall it this was the case for her. On his deathbed!
God needed me to be tough to survive these times. No matter what I have endured, I wouldn’t change a thing……even my mother’s suicide. This world was too tough for her and she wanted to be with Jesus. She has been my mother in other ways with his help. I just had to make s conscious decision about my soul and surrender.
Today many will be choosing to experience fellowship about Jesus indoors. I will be going to a park. The energy inside of many enclosed spaces, when other people are there, is difficult for me. Bless all of you today.
Stiff Kittens
Song by Blaqk Audio
We’re all still the same dear
I have owned this life forever
I’ll always remain
If it’s just the same dear
Why have you left before “forever?”
Yet returned
Again?
If you show me heaven
I will meet you there
How it breaks their hearts
That we’ve made an art
Of desecrating our
Sanctuaries
Sanctuaries
We’re one and the same dear
You were born for this forever
Forget your restraint
Remnants of a past here
Pass like light through dust as memories
Fall fleeting
Like pain
If you show me heaven
I will meet you there
How it breaks their hearts
That we’ve made an art
Of desecrating our
Sanctuaries
Sanctuaries
Sanctuaries
How it breaks their heart
Desecrate our
Sanctuaries
Desecrate our
Sanctuaries
Desecrate our
Sanctuaries
Desecrate…
Our sanctuaries
How it breaks their hearts
That we’ve made an art
Of desecrating our
Sanctuaries
How it breaks their hearts
That we’ve made an art
Of desecrating our
Sanctuaries
Source: Musixmatch
Songwriters: Jade Errol Puget / David Paden Marchand
Stiff Kittens lyrics © Blaqknoise Music
Goodness of God
Song by Bethel Music
OverviewLyricsListenVideosOther recordingsArtistsAnalysis
… I love You, Lord
For Your mercy never fails me
All my days, I’ve been held in Your hands
From the moment that I wake up
Until I lay my head
Oh, I will sing of the goodness of God
… And all my life You have been faithful
And all my life You have been so, so good
With every breath that I am able
Oh, I will sing of the goodness of God
… I love Your voice
You have led me through the fire
In the darkest night
You are close like no other
I’ve known You as a Father
I’ve known You as a Friend
And I have lived in the goodness of God (yeah)
… And all my life You have been faithful (oh)
And all my life You have been so, so good
With every breath that I am able
Oh, I will sing of the goodness of God (yeah)
… ‘Cause Your goodness is running after
It’s running after me
Your goodness is running after
It’s running after me
With my life laid down
I’m surrendered now
I give You everything
‘Cause Your goodness is running after
It’s running after me (oh-oh)
… ‘Cause Your goodness is running after
It’s running after me
Your goodness is running after
It’s running after me
With my life laid down
I’m surrendered now
I give You everything
‘Cause Your goodness is running after
It keeps running after me
… And all my life You have been faithful
And all my life You have been so, so good
With every breath that I am able
Oh, I’m gonna sing of the goodness of God
(I’m gonna sing, I’m gonna sing)
… ‘Cause all my life You have been faithful
And all my life You have been so, so good
With every breath that I am able
Oh, I’m gonna sing of the goodness of God
Oh, I’m gonna sing of the goodness of God
Source: Musixmatch
Songwriters: Jason Ingram / Ed Cash / Brian Mark Johnson / Jenn Louise Johnson / Ben David Fielding
Goodness of God lyrics © So Essential Tunes, Capitol Cmg Paragon, Bethel Music Publishing, Shout! Music Publishing Australia
To be 