30 May 2022 Loving Those We Don’t Agree With

https://youtu.be/XeQMzt2xHR4 – What are we doing? Senator Murphy slams inaction on gun violence (PBS Newshour)

This morning I am reflecting on Memorial Day or Veterans day as it is referred to. I’m remembering visiting Arlington National Cemetery several years ago. My husbands father and his family participated in a ceremony of playing taps. Each person positioned at different points in the cemetery and playing at the designated hour:

The time 3 p.m. was chosen because it is the time when most Americans are enjoying time off from work for the national holiday. Taps is instantly recognizable as the somber 24-note bugle call played at American military funerals and ceremonies.Apr 29, 2022

https://www.greaterseattleonthecheap.com ›

Sound Taps at 3PM on Memorial Day – Greater Seattle on the Cheap

This experience was extremely hard for me emotionally and spiritually. As we arrived at one of the places they would be playing we passed fresh graves…..new ones in the process of being dug. Ages on the tombstones were the ages of my husband, his brothers and me. There were people sitting with these stones with children. I looked at the vast field of white stones and was overwhelmed and overcome with sorrow. Today as I think of that experience, what all those people died for…hoping, thinking their sacrifice could make this country….this world a better place. I have to wonder were they mislead or have we betrayed them with the world we’ve created where hating and killing each other is still a common occurrence?

Can’t believe it’s been 2 years since this picture!

As a Veteran speaking only for myself, the best way to thank me for my service is to do whatever is possible to manifest a world where soldiers are no longer needed.

Questions…..”what are we doing?” and “what is all this for?” I hear the phrase “Happy Memorial Day” and my first thought is “what is so happy about it?!” Same thing for Labor Day. I think many people don’t realize how much blood was shed and lives….families destroyed just so we can have a day off of work. Nothing is free especially not our freedom. People long for things to go back to normal and sadly I think, unless drastic steps are taken, this IS normal.

Each time trauma happens to a person, to a world, it’s an infinite drop making ripples that never cease. Once the drop falls the waters never remain still….at peace. Generation after generation endure the stories and the wounds. Each new trauma ripping off the bandage from the last wound….perpetual bleeding of flesh and souls for wounds that don’t get a chance to heal. I read yesterday there was another mass shooting in Chicago: https://chicago.suntimes.com/crime/2022/5/29/23146412/weekend-roundup-shootings-homicide-chicago-memorial-day?_amp=true – it’s not if another one will happen….it’s when.

You can turn off all the devices that broadcast these shared traumas….put your head in denial but I think we still remain affected. The collective consciousness of God and this earth just know when things are wrong. You can feel it in the air….in your soul. Kind of like what the movie Donnie Darko illustrated. Something or someone is missing but your not sure just what it is until you finally learn another trauma has been inflicted.

I know this song is sad but sometimes sad songs help us clear out the traumas and make a bigger space for God…for inevitable change:

https://youtu.be/DHtcliIvnHI – Gary Jules – Mad World (Donnie Darko Soundtrack)

Mad World

Song by Michael Andrews

All around me are familiar faces
Worn out places, worn out faces
Bright and early for the daily races
Going nowhere, going nowhere

Their tears are filling up their glasses
No expression, no expression
Hide my head, I wanna drown my sorrow
No tomorrow, no tomorrow

And I find it kind of funny
I find it kind of sad
The dreams in which I’m dying
Are the best I’ve ever had
I find it hard to tell you
I find it hard to take
When people run in circles it’s a very, very
Mad world, mad world

Children waiting for the day they feel good
Happy birthday, happy birthday
And I feel the way that every child should
Sit and listen, sit and listen

Went to school and I was very nervous
No one knew me, no one knew me
Hello, teacher! Tell me, what’s my lesson?
Look right through me, look right through me

And I find it kind of funny
I find it kind of sad
The dreams in which I’m dying
Are the best I’ve ever had
I find it hard to tell you
I find it hard to take
When people run in circles it’s a very, very
Mad world, mad world

Enlarging your world
Mad world

Source: Musixmatch

Songwriters: Orzabal Roland

Mad World lyrics © Chrysalis Music, Roland Orzabal Limited, Roland Orzabal Ltd

A rose in remembrance of all who have given their lives in the hope for peace.

John 15:13New International Version

13 Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one’s life for one’s friends.(A)

30 May 2021 Memorial

Hello to you, how are you? It’s hard to believe it’s already been a year since the last Memorial Day….how quickly does time go as I get older. I miss the family I spent the last Memorial Day with in Texas but God has provided me with loving family in my here and now. There is great symbolism in Memorial Day. It symbolizes for me both endings and beginnings. I am still mourning my losses and probably always will on some level or another. Do we ever truly forget those we love? Once a name has been etched on heart does it ever completely fade? I say no.

memorial day ” in the English Ordinal system equals 116

25 May 2020 Beth Tim Kyle and Cole

26 September 2020 Friends

Hello to you.  How are you today?  This morning I am still processing what happened yesterday.  I went out and spent a few hours with husband and his family for Memorial Day.  Kyle and I had the talk I been dreading for us to have but it was necessary.  Spot sat between us.  The past four years have just proven to be more than Kyle can take.  He is also trying to progress in a career where he is going to be gone a lot.   I may not be financially high maintenance but emotionally I can be.  I’m kind of like a dog with separation anxiety to be honest.   I don’t do well being by myself too long.  So he’s doing what is best for himself and ultimately I think this will be good for me too I just can’t see it yet.  I think things are going to be alright.  With everything that has happened between us the past few years, our friendship remains intact and that means the world to me!   I got to spend time with Spot too and she seemed much more relaxed than I’ve seen her in a long time which is a good thing.

25 May 2020 – beautiful Spotty in her first bed

At about 3 pm Tim played TAPS.  It reminded me of when we had all gone to Arlington National Cemetery and he and his family played.

25 May 2020 Tim Played TAPS in honor of Memorial Day

25 May 2020 Beth Tim Kyle and Cole

We played a few rounds of Yahtzee and of course I didn’t win!  It was fun to spend some time together like that.  I am blessed to have such understanding people as family.

25 May 2020 – Yahtzee!

25 May 2020 – handsome Henry. He and Link are always fighting over Kyle’s Mom Beth!

 

25 May 2020 Remembering

How are you today?  I’m doing pretty good.  It’s a wet Memorial Day.  They say it’s going to be like this all day.  I guess it’s a fitting thing that it be raining on this somber holiday.  In the past couple of years, my husband and honored this holiday by going to our local cemetery.  Instead of doing that this year, I will be going to spend some time with my husband, his family and of course Spotty.  Last night before bed I was imagining saying hello to her and being so excited!

Our Spotty Girl –  I miss her 

Memorial Day” in the English Ordinal system equals 116

a remembrance” in the English Ordinal system equals 98

together” in the English Ordinal system equals 98

Remembering, like I mentioned in my post yesterday, is a mixed thing.  It can be a helpful skill and as my husband used to day about his having a great memory, it can be a curse.   I am struggling with the curse part right now.  When I remember things it is such a visceral experience that it hurts.  In our current times I’m sure I’m not alone.   On this day I can guess there are many who wish they didn’t have to remember what today is about!   My heart goes out to anyone reading this that can relate to that.

Goals for today:

Today I will rest in gratitude that I am here and yet able to remember.  Today I will give thanks for what and who I have in my life.  Today I will have hope that today and the tomorrows yet to come will be filled with great new memories.