2 September 2020 Memory (blessing or a curse)

Hello again how are you?

Do you ever feel like having a good memory is both a blessing and a curse?  Right now I am feeling like it is a curse of sorts.  I want to move forward with my life but memories keep popping up that drag me backwards.  When I get dragged backwards it’s a very visceral experience and a lot of times I feel it on a physical level.  This is ironic because for so long I was lending my support to a program called Music and Memory!  As of right now, I am unable to listen to much music now!  So many songs I liked to listen to are connected to memories of the past 12+ years.

Is this why people smoke, drink and or do illegal  drugs?!!!!

So I am going to ask a question in the numbers and see what comes out:

Is having a good memory a blessing or a curse?” in the English Ordinal system equals 408 (left side of the brain, with people, place and or object in between in eternity and or the race track of life existence.  Could the object be the brain or the memory?)

four zero eight” in the English Ordinal system equals 173 (one all vices in check yes, no, may be existence)

one seven three” in the English Ordinal system equals 155 (one all of the senses for light and shadow self)

one five five” in the English Ordinal system equals 118 (one and one separated in eternity and or the racetrack of life existence)

one one eight” in the English Ordinal system equals 117 (one and one separated all vices in check)

one one seven” in the English Ordinal system equals 133 (one yes, no may be for the light and shadow self)

one three three” in the English Ordinal system equals 146 (one left side of brain all vices in check but one 46=Body)

curse” in the English Ordinal system equals 66 (all vices in check but one both light and shadow of self)

blessing” in the English Ordinal system equals 87 (eternity all vices in check)

memory” in the English Ordinal system equals 89 (eternity and “nein” and or no existence)

music” in the English Ordinal system equals 65 (all vices in check but one with all the senses)

25 May 2020 Remembering

How are you today?  I’m doing pretty good.  It’s a wet Memorial Day.  They say it’s going to be like this all day.  I guess it’s a fitting thing that it be raining on this somber holiday.  In the past couple of years, my husband and honored this holiday by going to our local cemetery.  Instead of doing that this year, I will be going to spend some time with my husband, his family and of course Spotty.  Last night before bed I was imagining saying hello to her and being so excited!

Our Spotty Girl –  I miss her 

Memorial Day” in the English Ordinal system equals 116

a remembrance” in the English Ordinal system equals 98

together” in the English Ordinal system equals 98

Remembering, like I mentioned in my post yesterday, is a mixed thing.  It can be a helpful skill and as my husband used to day about his having a great memory, it can be a curse.   I am struggling with the curse part right now.  When I remember things it is such a visceral experience that it hurts.  In our current times I’m sure I’m not alone.   On this day I can guess there are many who wish they didn’t have to remember what today is about!   My heart goes out to anyone reading this that can relate to that.

Goals for today:

Today I will rest in gratitude that I am here and yet able to remember.  Today I will give thanks for what and who I have in my life.  Today I will have hope that today and the tomorrows yet to come will be filled with great new memories.