Hello to you today. Hope this finds you well. Yesterday we celebrated my Aunts birthday at Olive Garden and boy was it busy there! It was nice to be together though and the meal was really good. She had the tiramisu for her birthday dessert and shared it.
The birthday girl and my Uncle John
On the way home yesterday I got an alert of low tire pressure so I called Perfection Tire and Repair in town this morning and they said they could help me out first come first serve. They aired up my tires for free! I was so grateful about that! Totally unexpected and appreciated.
Hello to you. How are you today? Today my message has to do with reconciling what happened to me during my episode and not giving up my faith about it. When the police tazzed me like they did I screamed out for Jesus to come and help me but he didn’t come. I ended up in the hospital again. Is that what the answer was? Working through other people to help me? This is what a lot of people have said to me. I have had a crisis of faith but realize without Jesus and his people I am so alone.
Church today
I am not giving up on my faith. May be in all that is happening is a humbling I needed – to realize I can’t do this life alone and have to ask for help.
Hello to you. How are you? Today I’m having a tree trimming service come out and trim my neighbors tree back from my house. It’s amazing how much growth happened over the summer and early fall. It’s not cheap either but needs to be done.
My neighbors tree reaching over to my house
News about Dad is he’s dealing with a UTI (urinary tract infection). Please keep him in your prayers. His name is Larry.
later – think this might be what I’m dealing with for the swaying:
Mal de Debarquement It literally means sickness of disembarkment. It refers to an illusion of movement felt as an aftereffect of travel on water most frequently. Most individuals will recover following exposure to motion within a few days. It becomes pathological if it persists more than a month. Most patients note a resolution of their symptoms within 12 months. Middle-aged women are most at risk, following exposure to an unfamiliar movement and removal of the stimulus. The pathophysiological process seems to arise from the brain rather than the inner ear. Functional MRI studies suggest that the brain is able to adapt to an unfamiliar movement but is unable to readapt once the movement has stopped. Most commonly, the patients describe their symptoms as rocking, swaying and disequilibrium and rarely a spinning vertigo. The symptoms are worsened when the subject is in an enclosed space or when they are motionless. They feel better when they are moving or driving. Diagnosis is made after taking an appropriate history and after ruling out other disorders that can cause dizziness. There is no single effective treatment for Mal de Débarquement Syndrome. Short-term use of benzodiazepines and may alleviate the symptoms. However, prolonged use may cause delay in the necessary compensation to recover. Vestibular rehabilitation is controversial. Early exposure to motion may exacerbate symptoms. After a variable wait time for spontaneous resolution it can be suggested. The rehabilitation will focus on readjusting the maladapted vestibulo-ocular reflex.
Hello to you. Today was pretty productive. My Aunt took me over to my house and I got to see the wreckage of what happened- it’s like somebody else was in my house! Things are broken and damaged. We got groceries so that’s taken care of. Tomorrow I will go home and be there for the first night alone. I’m a little nervous about it but it will be ok. Just take a bit at a time. Link is still limping pretty bad on his back leg but he wanted to go for a walk today so we took him.
The three most common dog knee problems include:
Luxating Patella. A luxating patella means is essentially the dog equivalent of a dislocated knee cap. …
Arthritis. Arthritis is a stiffness in the joint. …
Torn CCL/ACL. The cruciate care ligament (CCL) is the dog version of an ACL, anterior cruciate ligament, in humans.
Our doctor suspects a torn ACL for Link. I can’t believe it but he’s 48 years old in people years, will be 8 in doggy years on 9 December! I keep telling me someday he’s going to break my heart. Like the little boy in the story about why why dogs have such a short lifespan – they are born knowing how to be unconditional loving and good so they don’t have to be here as long!
In his aging he’s growing black hair under his eye! We thought of him being like a panda when we first saw him.
Today has started out good. I was able to get some of my ID replaced that I lost and the biggest news was we got Link back! His back leg is bothering him so we are taking him to the vet this afternoon to have it looked at. Hopefully nothing serious! It was scary being at the humane society shelter- so many barking dogs! I’m so glad to have my little boo bear back! I feel so much gratitude towards my family both current and past that helped us! This was another case of powerlessness and having to let God about it. Even though we are far apart, we are still connected and there for each other.
Today was a good and bad day for me. I had a bad manic episode which landed me in the hospital for the past few months. I thought it was the end of the world again and did some stupid stuff about it. Today my Aunt and Uncle braved the long drive to get me out and come home. On the way home we found out my baby boy Link got away from the dog sitters and got picked up by the the humane society that is making it really difficult to get him out. I am so disappointed but am trying to stay hopeful that everything is going to work out.
For a long time , most of my life, I have loved God. As I have matured and learned so much about matters of organic energy and matters of the spirit I have learned through personal experience how important it is to have s personal relationship. A relationship no one outside of myself can define. No book or written word. Sometimes just the sound of aspen leaves blowing in the wind. Always present. Recently I made a choice I had been straddling the fence about for many years. I decided to surrender my soul to Jesus Christ….not in the book but the one I have come to know through a personal relationship. In the sky, God and the Earth my mother…our shared mother and once they made a son. I don’t believe he left such is not the way of this system as I understand it. Too many words. Human beings trying to make sense of things as they had understanding at the time. Words of the time that have changed in ours. So many translations. So many individual perceptions. We are in the one circle. Sometimes mythology is our only comfort in times of great loss and confusion.
This morning I had an interesting dream. There was a woman I had a conflict with and she got so angry with me. We exchanged words and I thought that was it but then she started to slap my face faster than is even humanly possible. She was so angry! But I stood still and let her do it until finally she stopped. To me this was biblical. No matter what was going on, I stood my ground and didn’t retaliate against her. Something she did not expect me to do.
Matthew 5:38-40New International Version
Eye for Eye
38 “You have heard that it was said, ‘Eye for eye, and tooth for tooth.’[a](A)39 But I tell you, do not resist an evil person. If anyone slaps you on the right cheek, turn to them the other cheek also.(B)40 And if anyone wants to sue you and take your shirt, hand over your coat as well.
When I was growing up my Mom used to get very angry with me. I don’t want to go into it out of respect for her. She used to get so mad at me she would “see red.” I had to, later, learn to empathize with why she may have done some things she did AND because of those things she made me a survivor. She had a lot that made her the way she was and that influenced who I was but at the end of the day I had a choice. I could choose to not forgive her and lose the only Mom God gave me or forgive and not waste any more time feeding darkness that comes of it.
Imagine waiting nearly a whole life time to hear your father tell you he loved you……as I recall it this was the case for her. On his deathbed!
God needed me to be tough to survive these times. No matter what I have endured, I wouldn’t change a thing……even my mother’s suicide. This world was too tough for her and she wanted to be with Jesus. She has been my mother in other ways with his help. I just had to make s conscious decision about my soul and surrender.
Today many will be choosing to experience fellowship about Jesus indoors. I will be going to a park. The energy inside of many enclosed spaces, when other people are there, is difficult for me. Bless all of you today.
Sometimes people smile but they are a black hole sun.
To be 