3 June 2022 The Consoling and Healing Power of Music

June 3, 2022June 3, 2022 by saymber, posted in Bipolar life, Health, history, Home, human rights, In the News, Leading Life by Example, Mental Health, Music, Nature, photography, Politics and Government, Social media, Spirituality and Religion, technology, Television, Veteran Affairs, Writing and blogging

Hello to you. How are you? This morning I’m feeling grateful for so many things – I don’t want to be sad again today! These past couple of weeks have been so heavy! When I’m feeling low it’s gratitude that is my life preserver. With thoughts of gratitude comes my love for God and music. What an amazing thing for God to inspire us to create. Even if all you can do is hum a few bars! To me expressing ourselves in music is a fantastic form of praise to God and this earth.

https://youtu.be/TTXBLspw_Z0 – Paul Baloche God of Wonders

Music in it’s many forms has always been something I could turn to for every facet of life experience. Whether it be a happy, sad or confusing moment, there has been some sort of song. This morning I wanted to remember happier, sillier times in my life and the B-52’s came to mind. I think it’s so wonderful that after all these years they still perform together:

https://youtu.be/9SOryJvTAGs – B-52’s Love Shack

https://youtu.be/d1Nq82S7_0Q – Rock Lobster – B52’s

This psalm, 147, has a little bit of everything in it. God mending the hearts of the broken hearted and giving praise in song. I thought it was beautiful that there was music to honor the victims at Uvalde:

Psalm 147

¹Praise the Lord.^[a]

How good it is to sing praises to our God,
how pleasant and fitting to praise him!²The Lord builds up Jerusalem;
he gathers the exiles of Israel.
³He heals the brokenhearted
and binds up their wounds.
⁴He determines the number of the stars
and calls them each by name.
⁵Great is our Lord and mighty in power;
his understanding has no limit.
⁶The Lord sustains the humble
but casts the wicked to the ground.⁷Sing to the Lord with grateful praise;
make music to our God on the harp.⁸He covers the sky with clouds;
he supplies the earth with rain
and makes grass grow on the hills.
⁹He provides food for the cattle
and for the young ravens when they call.¹⁰His pleasure is not in the strength of the horse,
nor his delight in the legs of the warrior;
¹¹the Lord delights in those who fear him,
who put their hope in his unfailing love.¹²Extol the Lord, Jerusalem;
praise your God, Zion.¹³He strengthens the bars of your gates
and blesses your people within you.
¹⁴He grants peace to your borders
and satisfies you with the finest of wheat.¹⁵He sends his command to the earth;
his word runs swiftly.
¹⁶He spreads the snow like wool
and scatters the frost like ashes.
¹⁷He hurls down his hail like pebbles.
Who can withstand his icy blast?
¹⁸He sends his word and melts them;
he stirs up his breezes, and the waters flow.¹⁹He has revealed his word to Jacob,
his laws and decrees to Israel.
²⁰He has done this for no other nation;
they do not know his laws.^[b]Praise the Lord.

Voices and talents shared to help console a broken hearted Texas community:

https://youtu.be/lwmitxvM0LE – Light of the world church choir at memorial site of Uvalde shooting victims

https://youtu.be/FA1cupxYaKM – Mariachis honor victims of Uvalde school shooting with musical performance

https://youtu.be/ZjUE07zDtEA – 11-year old songs sings in honor of friend killed in Uvalde shooting

2 June 2022 At Last and Dog Stuff

June 2, 2022June 2, 2022 by saymber, posted in Animal Rights, animals, Bipolar life, Health, history, Home, human rights, Leading Life by Example, Mental Health, Music, Nature, photography, Politics and Government, Spirituality and Religion, Veteran Affairs, Writing and blogging

https://youtu.be/S-cbOl96RFM– Etta James – At Last

Sometimes you need a power ballad to encourage yourself to put your feet on the ground and engage with gravity! When I hear this song it just takes me to such wonderful places. Thank you Etta!

Yesterday Link and I had an experience I hoped not to face again with another dog. We were walking in the neighborhood and a dog we pass, that is normally on a leash, wasn’t and he went after Link and I. Link and I were both screaming and trying to get away when finally the dogs owner came out. He had to get another neighbors help as his dog just took off. This experience triggered feelings from when something like this happened in Alvarado when Spot and I were attacked by two pit bulls that had gotten loose. The town ended up passing a viscous dog law because of what happened! I’m not mad at the dog in all this. Dogs that don’t get regular exercise and stimulation get pent up and bored – they “do shit!” All those times Link and I had walked past while he was secured and would lunge at us I guess was foreshadowing for what happened yesterday.

It’s important to remember that the animals we choose to share our lives with have feelings, emotions and needs. These things unmet, neglected or ignored can have scary consequences. They don’t handle what’s going on inside like we do and as was the case yesterday, can’t really be reasoned with! Thankfully all that happened was rattled nerves and in Links case, a normally curly tail gone flat and between his legs. It was hard to get over hearing him scream like he did.

https://youtube.com/c/CesarMillanOfficial – Cesar Millan (Dog Whisperer Channel on YouTube)

Thinking of St Francis, a saint that loved animals:

Franciscan and Other Common Prayers

Prayer of Saint Francis of Assisi

Lord, make me an instrument of your peace.
Where there is hatred let me sow love;
Where there is injury, pardon;
Where there is doubt, faith;
Where there is despair, hope;
Where there is darkness, light;
Where there is sadness, joy.

O Divine Master, grant that I may not so much seek
To be consoled as to console;
To be understood as to understand;
To be loved as to love.
For it is in giving that we receive;
It is in pardoning that we are pardoned;
And it is in dying that we are born to eternal life.

Glad to see change is being considered in light of recent events in our country. I hope it will go beyond just consideration and become action.

1 June 2022 Letting God

June 1, 2022June 2, 2022 by saymber, posted in animals, Bipolar life, books, Health, history, Home, human rights, In the News, Leading Life by Example, Mental Health, Music, Nature, photography, Politics and Government, Social media, Spirituality and Religion, technology, Television, trust, Veteran Affairs, Writing and blogging

https://youtu.be/_RzsPdmfcaw – The Voice Dog remix by Timbu Fun feat Walter Geoffrey the Frenchie

https://youtu.be/92i5m3tV5XY – F*ck that an honest meditation

Link cooling his belly on a break during our walk yesterday. He loves the grass!

How are you today? Link and I are doing pretty good. Last night was a bit rough for both of us but eventually Jesus and his team got us some rest. There is so much light and energy going on at night and I’m sensitive to it. Something I’m doing now is trying to get off the phone before bed and do some singing. The Tanpura is great to sing with along with Mei-lan. Just tones varying in range and duration….no words. It’s like prayer.

Today’s message from A Woman’s Spirit is a good reminder about the futility of trying to control others….letting God:

Basically, I have two choices: either accept people and their behavior at face value, or remove myself from the situation. I cannot change other people, but I can control my behavior.

Trying to control other people has been a long- term character defect for most of us. Becoming abstinent didn’t take away the seduction of control. Perhaps for some of us becoming abstinent even heightened the seduction. Minds no longer clouded by alcohol or other drugs see with greater clarity many more invitations to control.

At first glance, it seems unfortunate that becoming free of the obsession to use chemicals didn’t also free us of trying to control the people and events in our lives. But had that been the case, we would have relied less on our Higher Power for help to grow and change. And the greatest gift of this recovery program is learning that we have “One who is all powerful” to help us make decisions, to guide us every step of the way.

I will protect my serenity today by letting people in my life take charge of themselves. If I begin to falter, my Higher Power will help me.

__________

https://youtu.be/EoZPTaoo134 – The Embrace feat Ruby Amanfu (The Chosen)

Proud of Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau and the people of Canada for deciding to take steps towards peace.

31 May 2022 Seventy-nine

May 31, 2022May 31, 2022 by saymber, posted in Art and Poetry, drawing, dreams, history, Home, Leading Life by Example, Mental Health, Music, Nature, photography, Spirituality and Religion, trust, Veteran Affairs, Writing and blogging

Drawing I did of my Dad and his Mom Irene many years ago

Hello to you. How are you today? I hope you are doing ok. It’s been rough here but I’m doing better. Last night I tried to sleep without extra meds and was doing pretty good until I woke up after a weird dream. It started with seeing my phone and an image on it like from the group Anonymous. Then I was sitting with someone watching tv. The tv flickered and that same image appeared on the tv screen! What woke me up was hearing a scary voice saying, “no need to alert the authorities.” My brain doing weird stuff again lol!

Anyhew…. today is my Dad’s 79th birthday! Wow! It’s hard to believe but he and I used to joke that he was going to live as long as Moses! That’s like 120! If he and I were together today we would be dueling with our forks over Mom’s chocolate pudding dessert. The past couple of years have been hard on him but he is a survivor – something he and Mom always taught me to be! I’m missing him today. I miss his hugs! There is something about a hug from your Dad. I just felt so loved and safe when we hugged….the worlds noise and cares couldn’t reach me for a little bit. I love you Dad! ❤️

Many years ago, when I was still in Junior High, I was in an advanced writing program . They liked analogies I wrote. This one I wrote thinking of my Dad:

“An open window in spring is like the loving arms of a father.”

John 15:9New International Version

⁹“As the Father has loved me,^(A) so have I loved you. Now remain in my love.

https://youtu.be/oCE4VWKY5YI – happy birthday from alfalfa (little rascals)

30 May 2022 Loving Those We Don’t Agree With

May 30, 2022May 30, 2022 by saymber, posted in Bipolar life, Health, history, Home, human rights, In the News, Leading Life by Example, Mental Health, Movies, Music, Nature, photography, Politics and Government, Social media, Spirituality and Religion, Television, trust, Veteran Affairs, Writing and blogging

https://youtu.be/XeQMzt2xHR4 – What are we doing? Senator Murphy slams inaction on gun violence (PBS Newshour)

This morning I am reflecting on Memorial Day or Veterans day as it is referred to. I’m remembering visiting Arlington National Cemetery several years ago. My husbands father and his family participated in a ceremony of playing taps. Each person positioned at different points in the cemetery and playing at the designated hour:

The time 3 p.m. was chosen because it is the time when most Americans are enjoying time off from work for the national holiday. Taps is instantly recognizable as the somber 24-note bugle call played at American military funerals and ceremonies.Apr 29, 2022

https://www.greaterseattleonthecheap.com › …

Sound Taps at 3PM on Memorial Day – Greater Seattle on the Cheap

This experience was extremely hard for me emotionally and spiritually. As we arrived at one of the places they would be playing we passed fresh graves…..new ones in the process of being dug. Ages on the tombstones were the ages of my husband, his brothers and me. There were people sitting with these stones with children. I looked at the vast field of white stones and was overwhelmed and overcome with sorrow. Today as I think of that experience, what all those people died for…hoping, thinking their sacrifice could make this country….this world a better place. I have to wonder were they mislead or have we betrayed them with the world we’ve created where hating and killing each other is still a common occurrence?

Can’t believe it’s been 2 years since this picture!

As a Veteran speaking only for myself, the best way to thank me for my service is to do whatever is possible to manifest a world where soldiers are no longer needed.

Questions…..”what are we doing?” and “what is all this for?” I hear the phrase “Happy Memorial Day” and my first thought is “what is so happy about it?!” Same thing for Labor Day. I think many people don’t realize how much blood was shed and lives….families destroyed just so we can have a day off of work. Nothing is free especially not our freedom. People long for things to go back to normal and sadly I think, unless drastic steps are taken, this IS normal.

Each time trauma happens to a person, to a world, it’s an infinite drop making ripples that never cease. Once the drop falls the waters never remain still….at peace. Generation after generation endure the stories and the wounds. Each new trauma ripping off the bandage from the last wound….perpetual bleeding of flesh and souls for wounds that don’t get a chance to heal. I read yesterday there was another mass shooting in Chicago: https://chicago.suntimes.com/crime/2022/5/29/23146412/weekend-roundup-shootings-homicide-chicago-memorial-day?_amp=true – it’s not if another one will happen….it’s when.

You can turn off all the devices that broadcast these shared traumas….put your head in denial but I think we still remain affected. The collective consciousness of God and this earth just know when things are wrong. You can feel it in the air….in your soul. Kind of like what the movie Donnie Darko illustrated. Something or someone is missing but your not sure just what it is until you finally learn another trauma has been inflicted.

I know this song is sad but sometimes sad songs help us clear out the traumas and make a bigger space for God…for inevitable change:

https://youtu.be/DHtcliIvnHI – Gary Jules – Mad World (Donnie Darko Soundtrack)

Mad World

Song by Michael Andrews

All around me are familiar faces
Worn out places, worn out faces
Bright and early for the daily races
Going nowhere, going nowhere

Their tears are filling up their glasses
No expression, no expression
Hide my head, I wanna drown my sorrow
No tomorrow, no tomorrow

And I find it kind of funny
I find it kind of sad
The dreams in which I’m dying
Are the best I’ve ever had
I find it hard to tell you
I find it hard to take
When people run in circles it’s a very, very
Mad world, mad world

Children waiting for the day they feel good
Happy birthday, happy birthday
And I feel the way that every child should
Sit and listen, sit and listen

Went to school and I was very nervous
No one knew me, no one knew me
Hello, teacher! Tell me, what’s my lesson?
Look right through me, look right through me

Enlarging your world
Mad world

Source: Musixmatch

Songwriters: Orzabal Roland

Mad World lyrics © Chrysalis Music, Roland Orzabal Limited, Roland Orzabal Ltd

A rose in remembrance of all who have given their lives in the hope for peace.

John 15:13New International Version

¹³Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one’s life for one’s friends.^(A)

29 May 2022 The Healing Energy of Love

May 29, 2022 by saymber, posted in Art and Poetry, Health, history, Home, human rights, In the News, Leading Life by Example, Mental Health, Nature, photography, Spirituality and Religion, Veteran Affairs, Writing and blogging

1 Corinthians 13New International Version

13 If I speak in the tongues^[a] of men or of angels, but do not have love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. ²If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but do not have love, I am nothing. ³If I give all I possess to the poor and give over my body to hardship that I may boast,^[b] but do not have love, I gain nothing.

⁴Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. ⁵It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.⁶Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. ⁷It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.⁸Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away. ⁹For we know in part and we prophesy in part, ¹⁰but when completeness comes, what is in part disappears. ¹¹When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put the ways of childhood behind me. ¹²For now we see only a reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known.¹³And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.

I experienced this yesterday and it was very healing – a lot of tears! When I awoke in the middle of the night in excruciating pain in my right leg, it was remembering this video, using the medicine inside myself with The love of Jesus – transmuting pain with love energy, that helped make it go away. Thank you Andrea:

https://youtu.be/QY_nhXgQbtw – Receive Love Now – Full Hour Distance Reiki Session ( Reiki Master Andrea Kennedy)

My neighbors have made such a beautiful space to see each day

28 May 2022 Insanity

May 28, 2022 by saymber, posted in animals, Bipolar life, Health, history, Home, human rights, In the News, Leading Life by Example, Mental Health, Money, Nature, photography, Politics and Government, Science (Keshe Foundation and other innovations), Social media, Spirituality and Religion, technology, Television, trust, Veteran Affairs, Writing and blogging

Hello to you. How are you today? It’s Saturday here as I write to you and I’m still struggling to climb out of the valley I’m in. Last night everything was going good for sleeping and then I woke up to a violent crash. Link either fell or jumped off the opposite side of the bed. It was hard for both of us to get back to sleep. The way he was acting was like the whole thing scared him. Certainly freaked me out. He’s never done that before.

I have been sitting here trying to find positive and uplifting words to share with you. It’s hard. So I will simply say something I wish the whole world could feel and hear as we struggle together: I love you

The title of my post today is from looking for a message and just not feeling any of them are right for today. It is indeed insanity to keep doing the same things and expect anything to change. That is my message to Ted Cruz, Greg Abbott, Dan Patrick, Ken Paxton and leaders like them in the United States of America. It is my sincere hope that God has a better plan than any I’ve seen or heard from you.

27 May 2022 Times in the Valley

May 27, 2022 by saymber, posted in Art and Poetry, Bipolar life, Health, history, Home, human rights, In the News, Leading Life by Example, Mental Health, Nature, photography, Politics and Government, Social media, Spirituality and Religion, Television, trust, Veteran Affairs, Writing and blogging

Hello to you. Another week has come and gone. Today doesn’t find me on top of a mountain but down in a valley. I’m just finding it difficult to right myself after the latest goings on. Last night I was falling asleep and heard a loud noise inside and outside of my head and it startled me. Then I felt this presence fill the room and seem to be standing right next to me. There was a cold chill and I felt like I was being touched. Whatever was happening was not comforting and made me feel really anxious! When I asked if Jesus was there whatever it was went away. This kind of stuff happens to me and it’s so hard to understand.

As I write to you, I’m not feeling very rested but I can’t go back to sleep. What is my mind and body doing or is it something else? Someone else? I just don’t know! Praying and hoping Jesus will reveal some answers!

https://youtu.be/o5OnF3sg0cY – The Chosen Scene Jesus Gives The Beatitudes

Matthew 5New International Version

Introduction to the Sermon on the Mount

5 Now when Jesus saw the crowds, he went up on a mountainside and sat down. His disciples came to him, ²and he began to teach them.

The Beatitudes^(A)

He said:

³“Blessed are the poor in spirit,
    for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.^(B)
⁴Blessed are those who mourn,
    for they will be comforted.^(C)
⁵Blessed are the meek,
    for they will inherit the earth.^(D)
⁶Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness,
    for they will be filled.^(E)
⁷Blessed are the merciful,
    for they will be shown mercy.^(F)
⁸Blessed are the pure in heart,^(G)
    for they will see God.^(H)
⁹Blessed are the peacemakers,^(I)
    for they will be called children of God.^(J)
¹⁰Blessed are those who are persecuted because of righteousness,^(K)
    for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.^(L)

¹¹“Blessed are you when people insult you,^(M)persecute you and falsely say all kinds of evil against you because of me.^(N) ¹²Rejoice and be glad,^(O) because great is your reward in heaven, for in the same way they persecuted the prophets who were before you.^(P)

26 May 2022 Walter and Being Grumpy

May 26, 2022 by saymber, posted in Animal Rights, animals, Food, Health, Home, human rights, Leading Life by Example, Mental Health, Movies, Nature, photography, Social media, Spirituality and Religion, Television, trust, Veteran Affairs, Writing and blogging

https://youtu.be/R7t0Ol6RtRY – Grumpy and Snow White

https://youtu.be/xmQfoAvlIQc – Frenchie arguing with his owner – Walter Geoffrey the French Bulldog

Hello. For the past couple days I have been feeling really grumpy. Sleep has been weird and my body has been hurting. I don’t like being grumpy or being pessimistic about my life so I’ve been trying to find ways to restore “happy Jackie.” One way I found was watching and listening to Walter Geoffrey who is a very vocal French Bulldog. Hearing and watching Walter’s meltdowns has been great therapy! Ohhhh how this boy tells how it is! Sometimes his rants sound like singing to me he just needs some brothers and a drum. What I hear from him is what I’m feeling lately. There aren’t words for it and that’s why Walters behavior resonates with me. There is an energy I’ve been sensing, especially when I go outside, that is just really tense and uncomfortable. I know part of it is myself and the frustration I’m feeling with my body but part of it is just the world I think! All of creation is going through some stuff!

I’ve been trying to do movement to music each day and singing which helps alleviate discomfort. I’m just really out of shape and have gained weight which puts more pressure on the spine and joints. I also listen to the chakra opening meditations and sing tones along with healing focused music like I shared by Mei-lan. I talk to God most of the day and sometimes I bet I sound a bit like Walter to him lol! I’m trying to eat better and drink more water. I’m trying not to be a grump! Sometimes mending pains in the body includes mending the mind and soul too. Intangible pain, the pain we feel emotionally and spiritually, can manifest tangibly in the body. Grief is a big one for that! If you are grieving it’s important to allow yourself to feel it….work through it. I try to remember that everything is a form of energy to include pain.

How are you doing? I hope something I’ve shared resonates with you… I hope it helps. I think a lot of us are experiencing some kind of pain these days. You are not alone! Like my neighbor and I talked about the other day, the only way we are going to get through these times is together. One of the mottos for Grace Bible Church is “Better Together.” When we are in pain and grumpy the tendency many of us have is to isolate ourselves.

God whispers to us in our pleasures, speaks in our conscience, but shouts in our pains: it is his megaphone to rouse a deaf world. C.S Lewis

25 May 2022 Mom

May 25, 2022May 25, 2022 by saymber, posted in Art and Poetry, Bipolar life, drawing, Health, history, Home, human rights, In the News, Leading Life by Example, Mental Health, Politics and Government, Social media, Spirituality and Religion, technology, Television, trust, Veteran Affairs, Writing and blogging

Hello to you today. How are you doing? I’m sitting here after a nice phone call with my Uncle and thinking about my birth mom. Today would have been her 80th birthday.

Drawing I did of my Mom several years ago

My mom Jeanne died by her own hand when she was just 26 years old. She suffered from depression and used a firearm. In the wake of what happened yesterday in Uvalde Texas, Brooklyn New York, Laguna California, Lowellville Ohio and just down the street from me here in Middleton Idaho…and places I haven’t heard about I am feeling discouraged about our country. After all this time my mom has been gone things aren’t much better in regards to mental and spiritual health in this country – it seems worse. This stuff keeps happening. People with some sort of problem be it physical, emotional, spiritual or economical either turning it on themselves or turning it on the world they live in and using a weapon to do it. After all the times we have been through the trauma of gun violence as a country….a world….still it goes on. Is God too slow to answer or are we too slow to hear and act?

People say if it wasn’t guns these people would use something else. Sadly, that’s a true statement. My therapist and I have talked about it. I tried to take my own life a couple years ago – it was access to pills for me. What I see going on is deeper than the surface issues, problems and causes we like to blame for these eruptions of passion. The “why” of it is where to begin and that is complicated and that takes time. It’s expensive. It’s easier to just keep dispensing cocktails of pills. I think we are still where we are at because no one wants to face the why of it, take responsibility and enact meaningful change. So we keep wiping up blood and handing down trauma with all its labels to yet another generation.

Pointing fingers without self reflection….we are so good at that! What our country is also good at is making troubled people famous. People who felt meaningless in life do something like what happened in Uvalde and just like that they are finally “somebody.”

What I have known from my own experience, people I have known and what I’ve observed these 54 years is that we are emotionally and spiritually sick in America. The mental health system of my mom’s day and a lot of what I’ve experienced being in the system are still inadequate. Some of us are taught to pray and told that will make everything okay again. Often things don’t change and later in life some of us learn there is action in prayer….God isn’t going to do it all for us. For some, especially those feeling powerless, this realization is enough to turn to other more immediate solutions for what ails them. As we are seeing….they pick up a gun and use it to express their unresolved problems and emotions. I know when I was growing up I wasn’t taught by anyone what to do with the insecurity and bad feelings that arose in me when I was bullied at school. I mostly turned those negative feelings and emotions on myself.

What’s different from my mom’s time and mine is now we have social media to broadcast suicides, hate and violent intentions at the click of a button. God, thoughts and prayers only go so far in this modern world of 24/7 media. Instantaneous poison for the spirit and soul.

I know…..echo chamber….preaching to the choir in my words here today. Can’t hurt to keep trying.

For Our Country

lossless-page1-800px-president_wilson_1919-bw-tif

Almighty God,
Ruler of all the peoples of the earth,
forgive our shortcomings as a nation,
purify our hearts to see and love the truth,
give wisdom to our leaders,
and steadfastness to our people,
and bring us at last
to that fair city of peace
whose foundations are mercy,
justice, and goodwill,
of which you are the designer and builder;
through your Son, Jesus Christ our Lord.
Amen.

Source: Woodrow Wilson