Category: Leading Life by Example

26 February 2022 Responsible Creation

by saymber, posted in Bipolar life, Food, Health, history, Home, human rights, In the News, Leading Life by Example, Mental Health, Money, Movies, Music, Nature, Politics and Government, Science (Keshe Foundation and other innovations), Social media, Spirituality and Religion, technology, Veteran Affairs, Writing and blogging
It was hard getting up this morning

Hello to you. How’s your day going? I’m getting a late start to the day. I just didn’t want to get out of bed!

Check out 26 February 2022 Saturday chat https://www.twitch.tv/videos/1408892493 my

Todays Twitch stream was good. We talked about a lot of stuff today! Addiction, the choice to have pets, psalm 26, different cultures living together, world peace, technology and responsible creation. One of my viewers asked if I feel like technology has brought people together and my answer was yes but it’s also a bit of an illusion. With technology I’m able to communicate with people all over the world – something without technology I wouldn’t be able to do. Without technology my life would be very lonely….but I have to remind myself that technology isn’t a replacement for one to one contact. Technology can’t replace what happens between people having face to face contact.

I wish there were more visionaries in the world of creation. So much of our worlds operations is based on short sightedness. How much money will this make me? Not how will this be a benefit to mankind. Follow from creation and through the entire life cycle of what is being created – where is what I want to create going to end up? Taking responsibility for our creations. When I really started thinking about my crafts and hobbies I ended up stopping a lot of what I was doing! I liked to paint but realized the environmental impact of my enjoying it – the paint in the water for example. One area of late that I am concerned about with this is robotics. I would like to see more vigilance….more regulation but it’s already kind of too late! Anyways, talked about a lot today.

“Focus on how we are the same not how we are different.” – me

My thoughts and prayers are with the people of the Ukraine and Russia – any part of our shared world that is in conflict of any kind. We must learn to focus as a world on what we have in common not how we are different – what separates us. It’s like taking out your mental gratitude list. Once you think of one thing a whole bunch of others come to your mind! I just hope everything is going to be alright with all of this.

I highly recommend this video – we are all responsible for the “stuff” that gets manifested in this world: https://youtu.be/9GorqroigqM

ob·so·les·cence/ˌäbsəˈlesəns/Learn to pronouncenoun

  • the process of becoming obsolete or outdated and no longer used.”computers are infamous for their rapid obsolescence”

The Ocean Clean up Project: https://youtu.be/8HQEd_IX6A8. I’m very proud there are young people like Boyan Slat in the world.

25 February 2022 Friday Hoarders

by saymber, posted in Bipolar life, Health, Home, Leading Life by Example, Mental Health, Social media, Spirituality and Religion, Television, Veteran Affairs, Writing and blogging

Check out 25 February 2022 Friday Smokey’s visiting https://www.twitch.tv/videos/1407587191

Hello to you. How are you? It’s Friday and looking like a nice day outside. I have an extra house guest today. My Aunt and Uncle were going up to the mountains today and didn’t want to leave their dog Smokey alone all day. Link loves it when Smokey comes to visit.

So I’ve been watching an A&E show called Hoarders and it is reminding me of how important it is that we are careful how we fill the voids in our lives. What I’ve been seeing on this show is people putting things in the place of their individual traumas. It reminds me of things I used to do and how having a 12 Step Program and stronger relationship with God helped me stop doing those things. For me the big one was buying rings. For a time I just couldn’t stop! I remind myself regularly that things of this world cannot fill the intangible space reserved for matters of the spirit….Gods space in us. It’s all fleeting and changeable…..doesn’t last.

The message today from A Woman’s Spirit has to do with learning from the good example of others and also being a good example ourselves. I like the phrase “lead but your example.” It’s important to acknowledge that people often learn from us when we make mistakes too…..when we fail….when we fall down. We teach people then and also by how we put ourselves back together again.…pick ourselves up and move on.

“No one can tell you which choices to make. We can only show you by good example.” – Jan Pishok (A Woman’s Spirit)

“I am someone’s example for healthy behavior today. I won’t steer anyone wrong.” (A Woman’s Spirit)

23 February 2022 Wednesday

by saymber, posted in Bipolar life, Health, human rights, Leading Life by Example, Mental Health, Social media, Spirituality and Religion, Veteran Affairs, Writing and blogging

Check out 23 February 2022 Wednesday chat https://www.twitch.tv/videos/1307654970

Hello to you. How are you? I hope this finds you well. It’s a sunny day here but really chilly out! I had trouble getting up this morning. It was another case of waking up in the middle of the night and taking Hydroxyzine to go back to sleep. I almost missed my therapists phone call. She helped me get out of bed and get some breakfast.

The message on the stream today was partially about multigenerational trauma. This was because of the messages in the reading for today in A Woman’s Spirit. What happened to us in our childhood doesn’t have to determine what our life as adults will be like. We can make a conscious choice to learn from those experiences and grow as people. Every walk of life has suffered some kind of trauma – it’s up to us what we do with those experiences.

Today’s psalm is one of my favorites – psalm 23 :

Psalm 23New International Version

Psalm 23

A psalm of David.

1 The Lord is my shepherd,(A) I lack nothing.(B)
2     He makes me lie down in green pastures,
he leads me beside quiet waters,(C)
3     he refreshes my soul.(D)
He guides me(E) along the right paths(F)
    for his name’s sake.(G)
4 Even though I walk
    through the darkest valley,[a](H)
I will fear no evil,(I)
    for you are with me;(J)
your rod and your staff,
    they comfort me.

5 You prepare a table(K) before me
in the presence of my enemies.
You anoint my head with oil;(L)
my cup(M) overflows.
6 Surely your goodness and love(N) will follow me
all the days of my life,
and I will dwell in the house of the Lord
forever.

Snippets of color on the floor this morning that caught my eye

“Healing can occur when I see my family of origin as just a vessel to bring me into new spiritual growth , rather than as a predictor of all my life’s work .” – Judi Hollis (A Woman’s Spirit)

“Every day I am embarking on an adventure. What I do with my experiences today can be a positive reaction to what I learned from the past.” (A Woman’s Spirit)

20 February 2022 Lost But Not Worthless

by saymber, posted in Bipolar life, Leading Life by Example, Spirituality and Religion, Veteran Affairs, Writing and blogging

Hello to you today. How are you? I decided not to do a Twitch Stream today and that’s ok! A day of rest! This morning I got up late and almost missed church but I’m glad I made it. The message from Pastor Jason was good. He used the story of when he lost his wallet helping with farm work. It fell out of his back pocket and fell in the field covered with dirt. He and his friends went out looking for it and it wasn’t found until a couple months later! The lost wallet is like us…..like I’ve been so many times in my life….lost from my relationship with God. God seems to always be there waiting for the children to find their way home. Being lost like that wallet doesn’t mean we are worthless . We still have great value but we just aren’t doing what we were made to do. Our full potential isn’t being realized when we are lost. Least that is what I got out of his sermon!

Last night my Aunt and I went to a ladies game night at church and I met some really nice women. We played a game called Mad Gab first and that was just not my game lol! You get into teams and read these unrelated words to make a saying or phrase. I think I figured out one lol. Then we played a dice game called Tenzies and I wasn’t very good at that either but it was fun. We had pizza, salad and desserts. What was really neat is I met a woman that I ended up sitting next to in church today! As I write I realized I actually first met her at Next Steps classes. That’s the class you take when you are considering membership in the church. It was nice to see a friendly and familiar face today!

19 February 2022 Redirecting the Trains on our Brains

by saymber, posted in animals, Art and Poetry, Bipolar life, drawing, Health, Leading Life by Example, Mental Health, Social media, Spirituality and Religion, Veteran Affairs, Writing and blogging

Check out 19 February 2022 Saturday chat (psalm 19) https://www.twitch.tv/videos/1303273522

Hello to you. How is your day? I’m sitting here in the morning sunshine as I write to you. It’s about 41 degrees and just feels so good. I just got off the phone with my sweet cousin. I love it when she and I can talk in the morning. She is so positive – just starts the day off right! We talk about matters of the spirit, love and family…..the good stuff we are grateful for in this life. I hope you have someone like that in your life. We are cousins but dear friends too. Just trying to navigate this life together.

On the Twitch stream today what came forth was trains again. How hard it is when the train of sorrow, anxiety and worry gets on the track. Everyone knows how hard it is to stop a train once it is in motion. So what I’ve been working on is talking to the conductor! Telling the conductor by my thoughts and actions that I don’t like the direction the train is going. I want to go in a different direction or to get off the rails completely. I am having to practice this every day. The first place I am learning to turn to is God…”hey God do you think you can help me get through this day?”

It’s hard when your in the middle of things to sometimes have the presence of mind to be still and think clearly. It just takes a lot of practice! “What can I do about what is going on or what I am experiencing right now?” A lot of times the answer seems to be nothing. What I am trying to learn after I ask that question and get that answer is to accept I am powerless but I can talk to God about it. Your Higher Power is ever present and unchanging. So really we are never completely powerless it just can feel like we are.

When that train of whatever it is gets on the track- I have a choice if I want to stay on it. I have the ability to talk to the conductor. We can change course, slow the train down and eventually get off of it altogether. Like anything it just takes practice – everyday.

It’s important to stay in the present – I’m having to practice every day
When are we going for our walk?!

“I have come to believe that all of my fears are false gods before me.” – Mary Casey (A Woman’s Spirit)

“Any fear I have today is of my choosing. Dwelling on God rather than on the fear will change every experience I have today.” (A Woman’s Spirit)

18 February 2022 First Night Trying Doxepin To Sleep

by saymber, posted in animals, Bipolar life, drawing, dreams, Health, Leading Life by Example, Mental Health, Social media, Spirituality and Religion, Veteran Affairs, Writing and blogging

Check out 18 February 2022 Friday chat (psalm 18) https://www.twitch.tv/videos/1302099821

It’s so frustrating when you want something to work and it doesn’t really!

Hello to you. How are you? It’s Friday….we made it! The sun is shining – yay! It’s been a long week.

Well last night I took Doxepin for a test drive to see if it would help me sleep. I started with one capsule and didn’t feel anything. I took another one and that seemed to help for a short while. I still ended up taking a Hydroxyzine which helped for a couple hours. So frustrating. Apparently doctors don’t like to prescribe Seroquel which I’ve heard people use for sleep: Seroquel and other antipsychotics are particularly dangerous for elderly patients and can lead to aspiration pneumonia, which is a common cause of death in elderly patients. Seroquel also causes significant excessive weight gain, which can be a factor in the development of Type 2 Diabetes.

So Anyhew…..I will keep pressing forward and hope I get enough sleep! I must have slept last night because I had a dream about my dog Spot. She came to me and I was holding her and just crying. I miss her so much. The only way we get to be together is in dreams.

The stream this morning was ok. In the Woman’s Spirit book the message had to do with control. That resonated with me as a I dealt with that issue much of my life. I learned from a very early age the the only thing I really had control of was my body. That’s what the anorexia and bulemia battles were about. I didn’t feel I had control of my life so I took control of my body. What I have had to learn is the tighter you hold on to what you can’t control the more power you give to what you dont want to be happening. It’s hard to let go of feeling like you have to be in control. I was the kind of person at work that would try to do everything because I didn’t trust in the abilities of those around me to get the job done right. I burned myself out big time and obstructed the way for those around me to learn what they needed to learn.

The other part of the stream was psalm 18 – boy was that a long one! I didn’t like it very much because it seemed to be a warrior talking about a battle and God helping him fight it. I don’t like war. In my opinion no one wins a war really. I think of all my fellow veterans and how many of them suffer from PTSD. Even if they are on the “winning side” they still lose so much of themselves. You can’t unsee the horrors of war. You can talk to God, go to church, take medication, go to therapy, exercise and have a healthy diet and still be tormented by what you have been through. Time and distance from what torments seems to be what really helps. Layers of time to bury the past. It frustrates me that there is so much war in the Bible specially when one of the 10 Commandments is thou shall not kill!

“The more I force things, the tougher my life.” – Helen Neujahr (A Woman’s Spirit)

“I don’t need to control anyone today. I am not insecure just as long as I let my Higher Power take charge of my affairs.” (A Woman’s Spirit)

17 February 2022 I Am With You

by saymber, posted in Bipolar life, Health, Leading Life by Example, Mental Health, Social media, Spirituality and Religion, Veteran Affairs, Writing and blogging

Check out 17 February 2022 Thursday chat (psalm 17) https://www.twitch.tv/videos/1300976426

Hello to you. How are you? I’m doing ok. We have another sunny day which is so nice! Last night I was up and down multiple times in the night. I took some Hydroxyzine and would sleep – it would wear off and I would wake up. Hopefully my doctor will call me today and prescribe something specifically for sleep. As I’ve mentioned before I was prescribed the Hydroxyzine for anxiety.

Last night I did something a little different than I normally do. I hadn’t taken any Hydroxyzine and was feeling anxious. I decided to watch the rebroadcast of Elevation Church’s Sunday service on Facebook- no weapon was the message: New International Version Isaiah 54:17
no weapon forged against you will prevail, and you will refute every tongue that accuses you. This is the heritage of the servants of the LORD, and this is their vindication from me,” declares the LORD. Pastor Steven Furticks message was powerful about this. The song I loved was this: https://youtu.be/m7O9jDf5wqM by Brook Ligertwood called Nineveh

Then before bed I found this recording that was very soothing: https://youtu.be/TVLMeKPhoXc – I will be with you…words I needed to hear. For me it’s “ I am with you .” No matter what is going on, I am with you. Who would guess that stories from the Bible could help anxiousness?!

I’m trying to find lasting methods to help me ease this chronic anxiety I’ve been feeling. My mind is willing to cooperate and listen but my body has been doing stuff lately. I’ll be sitting in church on Sunday and trying to focus on the message and my body will just start to act up. I will start to hyper focus on my breathing or other sensations going on in my body. A voice in the darkness will then say “ be present in this moment, stay here in the now.” My mind wants to be still and relaxed but it’s been hard to get my body to cooperate. Guess it’s just going to take more practice!

By making different choices I am being more conscious of my role in my own life. Something we talked about on the Twitch stream this morning is how important it is to have a strong relationship with the God of your understanding and also with yourself. This way when difficult times come your way you can weather those storms. I have been guilty of relying too much on the people, places and things of the world. When any of those things left me I became completely untethered and lost. People, places and things change and fade but God is everlasting and for so long as you live you have you!

“I am not to blame for anyone else’s problems today. Accepting blame was a habit. Cultivating a better attitude can be a habit too.” (A Woman’s Spirit)

Something fun I’ve been watching on Twitch is some role players on a channel called King Norcalius. Last night I asked a question and actually got a accurate answer – will I find love again? Check out 🔮Warriors of the Realm🔮 | Free readings with Orana🔮Soulbinder Ft. Granny Gertie👵 |⭐Improv! 🏹Fantasy! 🎭Roleplay! 📕Lore! https://www.twitch.tv/videos/1300518076

14 February 2022 Valentines

by saymber, posted in Art and Poetry, Bipolar life, drawing, Health, Home, Leading Life by Example, Mental Health, Spirituality and Religion, Television, Veteran Affairs, Writing and blogging

Check out 14 February 2022 Monday Valentines Day chat https://www.twitch.tv/videos/1297901452

Hello to you. How are you today? Hope this finds you well. It’s Valentines Day. For some this is a very special day. The retail industry loves this holiday! My take on it is if you are in a relationship with someone that everyday is Valentine’s Day! Don’t ever take each other for granted. Don’t wait for a holiday to show your special somebody that you care. When I was married we didn’t celebrate Valentines. We felt the holiday was just too commercialized. To each their own!

Got good news yesterday. My Dad was in and out of surgery for his fractured hip! I was really surprised he got in so quickly! Thank you for your prayers. Now he just has to heal.

We had a nice day yesterday. My Aunt and Uncle joined me at church which was such a treat! They got there before me and had told the pastor and some others it was my birthday so when I showed up they wished me a happy birthday! They had a little bouquet of flowers for me. It just really meant a lot! The big point of the sermon really resonated with me: “we do what we can in order to enable us to do what we can’t .” So much of my day to day is pushing through – trying to focus on what I can do not what I can’t.

Bouquet and cards – so grateful!

Later Link and I went over to my Aunt and Uncles. My cousin, who was also celebrating his birthday and his wife my dear friend was there. My Aunt made tamales and also made my chocolate pudding dessert! My Uncle grilled some elk steak on the grill. Later my cousins older grandkids stopped by and we all watched some of the Super Bowl. It was just really nice to be together! I’m so grateful to have loving family to celebrate these kinds of occasions with.

When I got home I was really anxious so I took Link on a walk. Then I went on another walk by myself. What was happening is I was getting sleepy and felt anxious thinking about trying to go to sleep. So frustrating! I finally did relax and watched the last quarter of the Super Bowl. My Uncle and I had spoken earlier about the LA stadium apparently it cost like 5 billion dollars to build! The LA stadium is practically in his backyard and so we had decided to pull for the Rams! It was nice to see them actually win.

“I will take time to notice the most important friends I have, my family. Each family member will get my love and kind thoughts today. “ (A Woman’s Spirit)

The weather has been nice. I was feeling restless so I got out and chalked a bit

11 February 2022 Pills and Dessert

by saymber, posted in Art and Poetry, Bipolar life, drawing, Health, Leading Life by Example, Mental Health, Social media, Spirituality and Religion, Veteran Affairs, Writing and blogging

Check out 11 February 2022 Friday morning chat https://www.twitch.tv/videos/1294588326

Hello to you. It’s Friday! We made it through another week. Sometimes that feels like a miracle.

I wanted to briefly talk about my experience with Hydroxyzine. It was prescribed to me to help me with anxiety but an beneficial side effect was drowsiness. When I took it I was able to relax and sleep. Well I had to get refills yesterday and they told me they changed manufacturers but assured me it was the same pill. NOPE! The new stuff doesn’t make me sleepy and the other night when I took it, it actually made me want to pace my house in the middle of the night! There is a difference between one manufacturer and another. My body noticed! Thankfully last night I just took my lithium and was able to sleep most of the night. I’m so tired of this but I’m not going to let it get me down.

The recipe can change just enough that you notice

I wanted to share with you my favorite birthday dessert- it sounds like my Aunt is making it for Sunday. My cousin and I will be celebrating our birthdays together!

Mom Schmidt’s chocolate dessert

Crust: mix 1/2 cup melted butter, 1 cup flour and 1/2 cup chopped nuts (optional) spread into a 9×13 pan and bake at 350 degrees for 15 minutes. Let cool and then add

2nd layer: mix 1 cup powdered sugar, 1 cup Cool Whip and 8 oz cream cheese. Then add

3rd layer: 2 pkgs instant chocolate pudding, 3 cups milk and 1 tsp vanilla. Once this layer sets top this last layer with the remaining Cool Whip and nuts if desired. Chill and serve.

The message from A Woman’s Spirit book today was about developing your inner voice. How do you talk to yourself? Is your inner voice nurturing or a reflection of the critical voices you used to hear around you? I’ve been working on cultivating an inner voice that speaks to me like a best friend would. It takes time and effort to reprogram ourselves from our early programming – from our earliest selves.

“I can listen to a loving inner voice if I practice loving myself and others today.” (A Woman’s Spirit)

10 February 2022 Thursday

by saymber, posted in Bipolar life, Leading Life by Example, Mental Health, Social media, Spirituality and Religion, Veteran Affairs, Writing and blogging

Check out 10 February 2022 Thursday morning chat https://www.twitch.tv/videos/1293499319

Hello to you. How are you doing today? I hope this finds you well.

My Twitch stream is short today as I have to conserve my WiFi minutes! Got a notice from my internet provider Sparklight yesterday that I had used up all my minutes. They were giving me more more minutes but charging me for them! I think my daily streams have been using a lot of it.

Today I talked a little bit about how we feed our heads….our souls. It was a reminder to myself about how what I read, watch and listen to shapes my souls perception of the world. An example is like watching the news sometimes. I usually avoid it because I don’t want to believe the world is going to shit! I want to believe there is good going on. My family and friends are testimony to that. Garbage in….garbage out.

Yesterday I spent some time listening to Thich Nhat Hanh talk about loneliness. His words really resonated when he talked about the importance of making a home within ourselves before trying to make one with someone else. Not too long ago I had a healing session with a friend and that was the message for me then too, “You are home.” The messages for the soul have many sources. Choose the sources wisely!

https://youtu.be/FoYKHy78oiw – Thich Nhat Hanh talk about Loneliness

“I will love the people in my life today. They are here with me now because that is God’s assignment for me.” (A Woman’s Spirit)