Hello to you. It is evening as I write to you. My thoughts are winding down and soon it will be time for bed. I’m trying to do what my therapist and I talked about on Tuesday. I told her about my troubles falling asleep and her suggestion was that I go to bed when I’m sleepy not just tired. Her advice really resonated with me. I had never really thought of going to sleep that way. When you’re sleepy you will feel it whereas when you are tired it’s more of a cerebral thing. For example I start going to bed at 9 pm and won’t fall asleep til 1-2 am! I usually have to have a nighttime meditation from YouTube on. The one I listen to the most is from the Relax For Awhile Channel with Joanne: https://youtu.be/204EcI6-9Vo?si=_NM2VlXI8PvdFgWZ
I wanted to mention that I am deeply disappointed about what is being done to the east wing of the White House. He’s acting like it’s his own house and can just do whatever he wants to it without permission. It’s our house! Very sad!
John 1:5New International Version
5 The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness has not overcome[a] it.
Link cooling his belly on a break during our walk yesterday. He loves the grass! Every time we walk past this rose it’s more lovely!
How are you today? Link and I are doing pretty good. Last night was a bit rough for both of us but eventually Jesus and his team got us some rest. There is so much light and energy going on at night and I’m sensitive to it. Something I’m doing now is trying to get off the phone before bed and do some singing. The Tanpura is great to sing with along with Mei-lan. Just tones varying in range and duration….no words. It’s like prayer.
Today’s message from A Woman’s Spirit is a good reminder about the futility of trying to control others….letting God:
Basically, I have two choices: either accept people and their behavior at face value, or remove myself from the situation. I cannot change other people, but I can control my behavior.
Trying to control other people has been a long- term character defect for most of us. Becoming abstinent didn’t take away the seduction of control. Perhaps for some of us becoming abstinent even heightened the seduction. Minds no longer clouded by alcohol or other drugs see with greater clarity many more invitations to control.
At first glance, it seems unfortunate that becoming free of the obsession to use chemicals didn’t also free us of trying to control the people and events in our lives. But had that been the case, we would have relied less on our Higher Power for help to grow and change. And the greatest gift of this recovery program is learning that we have “One who is all powerful” to help us make decisions, to guide us every step of the way.
I will protect my serenity today by letting people in my life take charge of themselves. If I begin to falter, my Higher Power will help me.
Hello to you. How are you today? It’s Saturday here as I write to you and I’m still struggling to climb out of the valley I’m in. Last night everything was going good for sleeping and then I woke up to a violent crash. Link either fell or jumped off the opposite side of the bed. It was hard for both of us to get back to sleep. The way he was acting was like the whole thing scared him. Certainly freaked me out. He’s never done that before.
I have been sitting here trying to find positive and uplifting words to share with you. It’s hard. So I will simply say something I wish the whole world could feel and hear as we struggle together: I love you
The title of my post today is from looking for a message and just not feeling any of them are right for today. It is indeed insanity to keep doing the same things and expect anything to change. That is my message to Ted Cruz, Greg Abbott, Dan Patrick, Ken Paxton and leaders like them in the United States of America. It is my sincere hope that God has a better plan than any I’ve seen or heard from you.
The first part of this, 9:2 really resonated with me today.
Hello to you how are you today? It got windy and cold here again! It will be warm again soon enough. I am feeling kind of tired today. Getting restful sleep has been hit and miss. Sleep seems to be one of those things many of us struggle with. Oh to be able to sleep like we did as kids!
The message from A Woman’s Spirit today talks about taking responsibility for our part in what happens in our lives:
Taking responsibility for the part I play in the cause of my problems frees me to do something about them. -Kathy McGraw
We used to love to blame other people for the burdens in our lives. That someone else was to blame for our personal upset was as obvious to us as rain splashing against the windshield. Yet the longer we looked at others rather than at ourselves, the more stuck we became in old behavior.
We’ve since come to understand that we simply cannot grow, we cannot harvest the fruits of this recovery program, unless we develop a willingness to take responsibility for who we are at every instant of our lives. As we begin taking responsibility for our actions, we feel empowered. We realize that we are who we have chosen to be. And we will be who we decide we want to be. As that reality permeates our consciousness, we will begin to know that our hopes can become real, because the promises in the Big Book are real.
I will feel strengthened by claiming responsibility for all that I am today. Before taking action, I can pause and consider whether I will feel good about my choice.
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What kind of choices are you making today? From what part of you are you deciding to take action?
Dancing feels so greatThinking about my Dad. He brought me this shell after a business trip to New York many years ago. You can still hear the ocean. I love taking pictures of the sun in the clouds. It’s like a brilliant eye peering down at me wherever I goA purple flower that I hadn’t seen yet this springI’m excited to see this – soon my favorite type of flowers will arrive (roses)
Hello to you. How’s your week been? I’m tired. I struggled with getting to sleep last night even with the medicine I have to try and help me. It’s comforting I guess to know I’m not alone in my experience!
The messages from A Woman’s Spirit today had to do with letting people in our lives be responsible for their own actions:
My children have a Higher Power, and it’s not me. – Carolyn White
I will focus on my life and my Higher Power today. Others’ actions are not my responsibility.
What’s hard about this message is for parents and authority figures they are put in the position of being responsible for other peoples actions. There are laws in place to help with that for authority figures in our world but not so much for the average parent! There has been a long suffering agreement that children don’t come with a users manual! Sometimes it’s really difficult to know where you end and others begin. We are so interconnected.
This morning I was thinking on last Sundays church message. How the way we deal with difficult people matters to God. This morning I reread the passage in the Bible that was used as the reference for the message. It’s in Romans:
9 Love must be sincere.(A) Hate what is evil; cling to what is good.(B)10 Be devoted to one another in love.(C) Honor one another above yourselves.(D)11 Never be lacking in zeal, but keep your spiritual fervor,(E) serving the Lord.12 Be joyful in hope,(F) patient in affliction,(G)faithful in prayer.(H)13 Share with the Lord’s people who are in need.(I) Practice hospitality.(J)
14 Bless those who persecute you;(K) bless and do not curse. 15 Rejoice with those who rejoice; mourn with those who mourn.(L)16 Live in harmony with one another.(M) Do not be proud, but be willing to associate with people of low position.[a] Do not be conceited.(N)
17 Do not repay anyone evil for evil.(O) Be careful to do what is right in the eyes of everyone.(P)18 If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.(Q)19 Do not take revenge,(R) my dear friends, but leave room for God’s wrath, for it is written: “It is mine to avenge; I will repay,”[b](S) says the Lord. 20 On the contrary:
“If your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him something to drink. In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head.”[c](T)
21 Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.
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It’s hard sometimes not to want to retaliate when we or someone we care about has been harmed in some way. From my own experience the defense mechanism is almost a reflex. It really takes a lot of self awareness and control to be able to stop yourself in difficult situations from reacting from a defensive posture. To “turn the other cheek” versus putting up fists. This message today is difficult when I think about the Ukraine and Russia. When it comes to this sort of situation, a war, how are people suppose to react when being peace loving could cost them their lives? I am praying about this question.
A lot of non-believers ask where is God? Where was God when _________ was happening to me or someone else? Why does/is God allow horrible things to happen? Sometimes I ask myself the same thing when stuff is going on. How I comfort myself is I can’t see the whole picture of this existence – but God can. God isn’t limited in years and experience like we are. God is the big picture. I think of cause and effect – there are so many pieces and parts to even just one moment….how complicated it must be to answer even the smallest of prayers. I think of saying a prayer to save a person or animals life. How many specific seemingly minute little things have to happen to answer that one prayer. How many other prayers have to go unanswered so that yours can be answered? I don’t envy Gods job!
Hello and good morning from here. How are you? Did you get sleep ? I don’t feel like I got much. After my post last night I tossed and turned til like 1 am or later. I finally got up and took a couple Benadryl and that got me a couple hours. So anyways….got some coffee and beautiful sunshine is streaming in. Laundry is going. It’s a new day!
I read the story I posted yesterday to one of my friends and he asked “What happens next?!” That made me smile. I told him it was meant to be that way. That’s what a short story is. There really are light and shadow beings. The technology of today is finally able to capture their images.
Today I’m thinking about revisiting a story I wrote way back in Sr High School like 1985 or 86……..yes I’m an old fart! The story was called How The Rose Came To Be. I don’t want to dig through my storage bins to find it so I’ll start from scratch. I will make it a separate post .
Tomorrow I have something to look forward to. One of the ladies I met through Meetup has invited me to coffee! I had put out an intention to God that even if I only met one person and made a friend that would be good. Prayers are being answered!
Hello there. How are you? I’m feeling really tired but know I won’t be able to go back to sleep. For the past couple weeks I just haven’t been able to sleep well. It happens to a lot of us I think, especially when we get older.
So first thing this morning I got groceries at our local Ridleys. It was a little tricky getting around the store as they are doing a pretty big renovation/reorganization of the store. It should be really nice when it’s done!
The past couple days I’ve been watching You tube videos about aliens and UFOs. It makes me think of the dream I had when I was in the hospital. It was so vivid. I was laying on a table and there were two Gray aliens. I can remember screaming at them “What did you do to my face?!’” I could see myself and half of my face was a Gray alien! Then I saw my dog Spot and she was looking outside and barking but nothing was there. The dream was felt more like a memory than a dream. Weird huh?!!
When I think of aliens and UFOs I think of how much trouble we have still to this day of peacefully coexisting with life forms that are different than ourselves. Even in the year 2021 we fight amongst ourselves. If I was an alien species I would be very reluctant to show up on the White House lawn too!
I have so many questions for them! How long have they been watching us? Can they help us save this planet?!
Do you think we are being visited by beings from other galaxies? Have life forms learned how to fold space and time and travel in between? Lots of questions and still few answers!
Hello again it’s me. How are you doing ? It’s about 8:25 pm here as I write to you. It’s really dark as the sun has set. I am sitting here alone with Link trying to figure out what to do with myself. It’s too early for bed. I could read, I could watch tv, I could listen to music but none of that appeals to me! I was wishing I had someone to talk to so I figured I’d write a little! I hope you don’t mind!
When the seasons change and we lose the light earlier and the sun rises later it really messes with me. My body will wake up and it’s still dark and I will be like “what the fuck do I do now?” I suppose I could be like normal human beings and just get my ass out of bed and do something! No I just lay there and ruminate about random shit until I can’t stand it anymore !
“Darkness the blanket over the season, slips me into the balm of reason. Alas it is brief and only the sun can bring relief. The shadows grow long too soon, the only light is the pale waxing moon. Where is my reason for existence in these everlasting nights, idle hands under phosphorescent lights. A land of creeping shadow hours, illuminated by artificial powers.”
Before electricity we were ruled by nature and her ways. We rose with the sun and went to bed with the moon. With modern advancements like the phone I’m using right now to write this, we are out of sync. We can stay up late when our ancestors were burning candles!
Ah well this is our modern world . The power grid never idles! Thank you for keeping me company awhile. Another long day drifts into shadows .
To be 