1 March 2022 Tuesday

March 1, 2022 by saymber, posted in Art and Poetry, Bipolar life, history, human rights, In the News, Leading Life by Example, Mental Health, Money, Music, Social media, Spirituality and Religion, technology, Television, Veteran Affairs, Writing and blogging

Check out 1 March 2021 Tuesday chat https://www.twitch.tv/videos/1412137597

Hello to you. How are you today? We are having a gray and overcast morning. It was rough last night. I had trouble getting to sleep last night.

Lots of birthdays this month. Today is my cousins wife and my Uncles wife birthday. Happy birthday!

Today’s Twitch Stream touched on several topics. One was money. I don’t feel like there is anything wrong with it but if you make it the primary motive for doing things life can be so empty. It’s an energy just like anything else – what you do with it. The other thing we talked about is how this world is really crazy right now. It’s a time to really look for the helpers….to be one of the helpers in these times in whatever way you can. Something simple everyone can do is with prayer and meditation. Turn your thoughts and your heart toward things of the Spirit….to the God of your understanding. Be one of the lights. I know it’s hard. I’m struggling with this myself!

Messages from A Woman’s Spirit:

“ The journey to a new life – physically, mentally , and spiritually —includes the joy of rediscovering a faith that had been lost.” – Louise A. Rice

“I will let my faith work in my life today. Nothing has to upset me,”

“Recovery is an intensely spiritual process that asks us to grow in our understanding of God. “ – Melody Beattie

“Believing in God’s presence today will make every experience rich with meaning. I am not alone, now or ever. “

A message from Fred Rogers about looking for the helpers: https://youtu.be/NB5uSHCIgS0

Human Family by Maya Angelou: https://youtu.be/eL_ofpwicsc

I note the obvious differences
In the human family.
Some of us are serious,
Some thrive on comedy.Some declare their lives are lived
As true profundity,
And others claim they really live
The real reality.The variety of our skin tones
Can confuse, bemuse, delight,
Brown and pink and beige and purple,
Tan and blue and white.I’ve sailed upon the seven seas
And stopped in every land,
I’ve seen the wonders of the world
Not yet one common man.I know ten thousand women
Called Jane and Mary Jane,
But I’ve not seen any two
Who really were the same.Mirror twins are different
Although their features jibe,
And lovers think quite different thoughts
While lying side by side.We love and lose in China,
We weep on England’s moors,
And laugh and moan in Guinea,
And thrive on Spanish shores.We seek success in Finland,
Are born and die in Maine.
In minor ways we differ,
In major we’re the same.I note the obvious differences
Between each sort and type,
But we are more alike, my friends,
Than we are unalike.We are more alike, my friends,
Than we are unalike.We are more alike, my friends,
Than we are unalike.

I pray for the people in conflict right now be it a person at war with themself to entire countries like the Ukraine and Russia. I pray for all leaders in this world that God will give them wisdom and enlighten them to see a future of light.

28 February 2022 Monday

February 28, 2022February 28, 2022 by saymber, posted in Bipolar life, history, human rights, In the News, Leading Life by Example, Mental Health, Politics and Government, Social media, Spirituality and Religion, Veteran Affairs, Writing and blogging

Check out 28 February 2022 Monday chat https://www.twitch.tv/videos/1410862988

Hello to you. How are you? I wasn’t here yesterday. I decided to take the day off. I went to church in the morning and once again I had trouble with the message. It’s probably just me. As a person who is very sensitive and uses my heart and feelings a lot it was hard to hear that I shouldn’t be doing that so much. I don’t think God just wants a bunch of automatons running around doing his bidding. Don’t we have free will? I am working on turning to God first but still use my heart. We prayed for the people of the Ukraine. I’m praying for them, Russia and this whole world. I’m praying for Putin too. It’s easy to pray for those who like and love us. We need to pray for those who harm us too.

Anyhew. After church I went with my friend to a rock and gem show in Boise. Wow! From the first table on I could feel the place was just vibrating! It’s like the rocks and gems were all crying out “hey! Pick me!” As I’ve mentioned before I used to really have a problem with compulsively buying jewelry. So me going to such an event was tough but I was good and didn’t buy anything. ALOT of beautiful things were there and lots of people. We went to Dickeys Barbeque afterwards and that tasted good. We both had the brisket. It was kind of weird as there was only two people running the whole place. It looked like s lot of their business was carry out. It was nice to get out with a friend!

In the evening I watched the rebroadcast of Elevation Church service and that was interesting. Pastor Steven Furtick was reading from Genesis. How everything God created had a purpose. He tied that in with an example of what people do, like being birds put in a fish bowl. Birds were made to fly. So many of us aren’t doing what we were made for. I think he was saying we were designed to worship God and that’s not entirely what’s happening. It’s the world we’ve made where the primary amount of our existence is devoted to the worship and care of people, places and things. It’s hard sometimes to find a balance in our devotions! To put our relationship with God as we understand them first in our busy lives.

“Choosing love as a way of life eliminates most of the conflict that undermines our well-being . Having faith that God is in charge takes care of the rest.” (A Woman’s Spirit)

26 February 2022 Responsible Creation

February 26, 2022February 26, 2022 by saymber, posted in Bipolar life, Food, Health, history, Home, human rights, In the News, Leading Life by Example, Mental Health, Money, Movies, Music, Nature, Politics and Government, Science (Keshe Foundation and other innovations), Social media, Spirituality and Religion, technology, Veteran Affairs, Writing and blogging

Hello to you. How’s your day going? I’m getting a late start to the day. I just didn’t want to get out of bed!

Check out 26 February 2022 Saturday chat https://www.twitch.tv/videos/1408892493 my

Todays Twitch stream was good. We talked about a lot of stuff today! Addiction, the choice to have pets, psalm 26, different cultures living together, world peace, technology and responsible creation. One of my viewers asked if I feel like technology has brought people together and my answer was yes but it’s also a bit of an illusion. With technology I’m able to communicate with people all over the world – something without technology I wouldn’t be able to do. Without technology my life would be very lonely….but I have to remind myself that technology isn’t a replacement for one to one contact. Technology can’t replace what happens between people having face to face contact.

I wish there were more visionaries in the world of creation. So much of our worlds operations is based on short sightedness. How much money will this make me? Not how will this be a benefit to mankind. Follow from creation and through the entire life cycle of what is being created – where is what I want to create going to end up? Taking responsibility for our creations. When I really started thinking about my crafts and hobbies I ended up stopping a lot of what I was doing! I liked to paint but realized the environmental impact of my enjoying it – the paint in the water for example. One area of late that I am concerned about with this is robotics. I would like to see more vigilance….more regulation but it’s already kind of too late! Anyways, talked about a lot today.

“Focus on how we are the same not how we are different.” – me

My thoughts and prayers are with the people of the Ukraine and Russia – any part of our shared world that is in conflict of any kind. We must learn to focus as a world on what we have in common not how we are different – what separates us. It’s like taking out your mental gratitude list. Once you think of one thing a whole bunch of others come to your mind! I just hope everything is going to be alright with all of this.

I highly recommend this video – we are all responsible for the “stuff” that gets manifested in this world: https://youtu.be/9GorqroigqM

ob·so·les·cence/ˌäbsəˈlesəns/Learn to pronouncenoun

the process of becoming obsolete or outdated and no longer used.”computers are infamous for their rapid obsolescence”

The Ocean Clean up Project: https://youtu.be/8HQEd_IX6A8. I’m very proud there are young people like Boyan Slat in the world.

25 February 2022 Friday Hoarders

February 25, 2022 by saymber, posted in Bipolar life, Health, Home, Leading Life by Example, Mental Health, Social media, Spirituality and Religion, Television, Veteran Affairs, Writing and blogging

Check out 25 February 2022 Friday Smokey’s visiting https://www.twitch.tv/videos/1407587191

Hello to you. How are you? It’s Friday and looking like a nice day outside. I have an extra house guest today. My Aunt and Uncle were going up to the mountains today and didn’t want to leave their dog Smokey alone all day. Link loves it when Smokey comes to visit.

So I’ve been watching an A&E show called Hoarders and it is reminding me of how important it is that we are careful how we fill the voids in our lives. What I’ve been seeing on this show is people putting things in the place of their individual traumas. It reminds me of things I used to do and how having a 12 Step Program and stronger relationship with God helped me stop doing those things. For me the big one was buying rings. For a time I just couldn’t stop! I remind myself regularly that things of this world cannot fill the intangible space reserved for matters of the spirit….Gods space in us. It’s all fleeting and changeable…..doesn’t last.

The message today from A Woman’s Spirit has to do with learning from the good example of others and also being a good example ourselves. I like the phrase “lead but your example.” It’s important to acknowledge that people often learn from us when we make mistakes too…..when we fail….when we fall down. We teach people then and also by how we put ourselves back together again.…pick ourselves up and move on.

“No one can tell you which choices to make. We can only show you by good example.” – Jan Pishok (A Woman’s Spirit)

“I am someone’s example for healthy behavior today. I won’t steer anyone wrong.” (A Woman’s Spirit)

24 February 2022 Thursday Snow

February 24, 2022 by saymber, posted in Bipolar life, Health, Mental Health, Social media, Spirituality and Religion, Veteran Affairs, Writing and blogging

Check out 24 February 2022 Thursday chat snow https://www.twitch.tv/videos/1406533700

Hello to you. How are you? I’m doing ok. We have snow this morning!

The message in A Woman’s Spirit for today resonated with me. Sometimes we are so busy thinking about our own “stuff” that we don’t hear what other people are trying to tell us. It talked about how we are both students and teachers interchangeably and that is something I have believed for a long time. We are all in school – this life is an education…..each and every day class is in session!

I found out this morning my cousins wife’s mother is struggling with Covid. Her name is Alice for those of you that pray and or meditate. My other cousins daughter found out she has a brain aneurysm! My parents are hanging in there with all the stuff they have been facing in the health department. It seems like there is always something to show us how much we need to appreciate this life- how fragile it is!

“We will never hear anyone else’s thoughts if we are only listening to our own.” – Cathy Stone (A Woman’s Spirit)

“I will be drawn to the people who have something to teach me today. I will listen first and think later.” (A Woman’s Spirit)

23 February 2022 Wednesday

February 23, 2022 by saymber, posted in Bipolar life, Health, human rights, Leading Life by Example, Mental Health, Social media, Spirituality and Religion, Veteran Affairs, Writing and blogging

Check out 23 February 2022 Wednesday chat https://www.twitch.tv/videos/1307654970

Hello to you. How are you? I hope this finds you well. It’s a sunny day here but really chilly out! I had trouble getting up this morning. It was another case of waking up in the middle of the night and taking Hydroxyzine to go back to sleep. I almost missed my therapists phone call. She helped me get out of bed and get some breakfast.

The message on the stream today was partially about multigenerational trauma. This was because of the messages in the reading for today in A Woman’s Spirit. What happened to us in our childhood doesn’t have to determine what our life as adults will be like. We can make a conscious choice to learn from those experiences and grow as people. Every walk of life has suffered some kind of trauma – it’s up to us what we do with those experiences.

Today’s psalm is one of my favorites – psalm 23 :

Psalm 23New International Version

Psalm 23

A psalm of David.

¹The Lord is my shepherd,^(A) I lack nothing.^(B)
²    He makes me lie down in green pastures,
he leads me beside quiet waters,^(C)
³    he refreshes my soul.^(D)
He guides me^(E) along the right paths^(F)
    for his name’s sake.^(G)
⁴Even though I walk
    through the darkest valley,^[a]^(H)
I will fear no evil,^(I)
    for you are with me;^(J)
your rod and your staff,
    they comfort me.

⁵You prepare a table^(K) before me
in the presence of my enemies.
You anoint my head with oil;^(L)
my cup^(M) overflows.
⁶Surely your goodness and love^(N) will follow me
all the days of my life,
and I will dwell in the house of the Lord
forever.

Snippets of color on the floor this morning that caught my eye

“Healing can occur when I see my family of origin as just a vessel to bring me into new spiritual growth , rather than as a predictor of all my life’s work .” – Judi Hollis (A Woman’s Spirit)

“Every day I am embarking on an adventure. What I do with my experiences today can be a positive reaction to what I learned from the past.” (A Woman’s Spirit)

22 February 2022 Tuesday

February 22, 2022 by saymber, posted in Bipolar life, Health, Home, Mental Health, Money, photography, Social media, Spirituality and Religion, Veteran Affairs, Writing and blogging

Check out 22 February 2022 Tuesday chat https://www.twitch.tv/videos/1306552599

Hello to you. How are you? I’m doing ok. I had kind of late start today. Outside is gray with sun trying to peak through. Looks like we got a few flurries overnight.

I went and got groceries yesterday – whew was that expensive! I spent about $200! Granted I was stocking up and also bought a lot of drinks to try and stay hydrated. Still if I spent that much for just one person I can’t imagine trying to feed an entire family!

Talked to my dad yesterday and he sounded pretty good. Thanks to all of you that have been praying for him and my mom. I get so pissed sometimes. They have been of service to God, their families and the community their whole lives. Nothing has come easy to them and now when they should be enjoying retirement together they are having to go through all this! I don’t understand God’s plan about it. I’m sure if I were to look at things through Gods eyes it would make sense but through little ol’ Jackie eyes it just seems cruel. Again, thank you for your prayers and positive words.

I’ve been trying to read a psalm a day. Today was psalm 22. It just didn’t resonate with me but that’s ok. From what is seems there is a lot of crying out to God for help in the psalms and some of them are really dramatic pleas! What do you think?

“I may make plenty of mistakes today. I can accept that. I’m learning and moving forward.” (A Woman’s Spirit)

21 February 2022 Monday

February 21, 2022 by saymber, posted in Bipolar life, Health, Mental Health, Movies, Social media, Spirituality and Religion, Veteran Affairs, Writing and blogging

Check out 21 February 2022 Monday morning chat https://www.twitch.tv/videos/1305451504

Hello to you how are you? It’s Monday morning again and I’m finally starting to wake up. What’s happening is the Doxepin isn’t really working like I hoped and I am still having to take the Hydroxyzine which makes me groggy. I’ve also been having lower back and leg pain which makes it hard to get out of bed. I resolved to myself that I’m going to try to do more stretching through the day to see if that helps. There is a part of me considering a yoga class they have in town. I used to do yoga! I could even do a head stand!

The stream was fun this morning. One of my viewers was involved in a school musical production of Grease. We had fun with a couple of the songs. It’s been ages since I was a huge fan of the movie starring Olivia Newton John and John Travolta. The age group my viewer is in are like 11 and 12 year olds. As you may or may not remember there are a lot of mature themes in Grease. My viewer joked that one of the cast was talking about “huge knockers” and he probably didn’t even know what he was talking about! LOL!!

Yesterday I was in the mood to watch movies which has been extremely rare! The first movie was Black Butterfly starring Antonio Banderas and Jonathan Rhys Meyers. When I initially had heard about the movie and saw trailers I wasn’t interested. I’m so glad I watched it! I can’t believe it was free on You tube! https://youtu.be/-_VUHxa7nwg – Black Butterfly. I was delightfully surprised at all the plot twists. The other one I watched and enjoyed was called The Illusionist starring Edward Norton and Paul Giamatti : https://youtu.be/KunQC6a6fPU – The Illusionist. I don’t want to tell you what these films are about – don’t want to spoil the surprise that each of them has to offer! It felt good to have the movie experience and not have my manic/paranoid/delusional self reading too much into what what I was watching.

“Practiced consistently, new habits become who I am.” – Lin Andrukat (A Woman’s Spirit)

“Any current behavior used to be “new.” It became a habit only with continuous use. I can decide to begin a new behavior today. “ (A Woman’s Spirit)

20 February 2022 Lost But Not Worthless

February 20, 2022 by saymber, posted in Bipolar life, Leading Life by Example, Spirituality and Religion, Veteran Affairs, Writing and blogging

Hello to you today. How are you? I decided not to do a Twitch Stream today and that’s ok! A day of rest! This morning I got up late and almost missed church but I’m glad I made it. The message from Pastor Jason was good. He used the story of when he lost his wallet helping with farm work. It fell out of his back pocket and fell in the field covered with dirt. He and his friends went out looking for it and it wasn’t found until a couple months later! The lost wallet is like us…..like I’ve been so many times in my life….lost from my relationship with God. God seems to always be there waiting for the children to find their way home. Being lost like that wallet doesn’t mean we are worthless . We still have great value but we just aren’t doing what we were made to do. Our full potential isn’t being realized when we are lost. Least that is what I got out of his sermon!

Last night my Aunt and I went to a ladies game night at church and I met some really nice women. We played a game called Mad Gab first and that was just not my game lol! You get into teams and read these unrelated words to make a saying or phrase. I think I figured out one lol. Then we played a dice game called Tenzies and I wasn’t very good at that either but it was fun. We had pizza, salad and desserts. What was really neat is I met a woman that I ended up sitting next to in church today! As I write I realized I actually first met her at Next Steps classes. That’s the class you take when you are considering membership in the church. It was nice to see a friendly and familiar face today!

19 February 2022 Redirecting the Trains on our Brains

February 19, 2022 by saymber, posted in animals, Art and Poetry, Bipolar life, drawing, Health, Leading Life by Example, Mental Health, Social media, Spirituality and Religion, Veteran Affairs, Writing and blogging

Check out 19 February 2022 Saturday chat (psalm 19) https://www.twitch.tv/videos/1303273522

Hello to you. How is your day? I’m sitting here in the morning sunshine as I write to you. It’s about 41 degrees and just feels so good. I just got off the phone with my sweet cousin. I love it when she and I can talk in the morning. She is so positive – just starts the day off right! We talk about matters of the spirit, love and family…..the good stuff we are grateful for in this life. I hope you have someone like that in your life. We are cousins but dear friends too. Just trying to navigate this life together.

On the Twitch stream today what came forth was trains again. How hard it is when the train of sorrow, anxiety and worry gets on the track. Everyone knows how hard it is to stop a train once it is in motion. So what I’ve been working on is talking to the conductor! Telling the conductor by my thoughts and actions that I don’t like the direction the train is going. I want to go in a different direction or to get off the rails completely. I am having to practice this every day. The first place I am learning to turn to is God…”hey God do you think you can help me get through this day?”

It’s hard when your in the middle of things to sometimes have the presence of mind to be still and think clearly. It just takes a lot of practice! “What can I do about what is going on or what I am experiencing right now?” A lot of times the answer seems to be nothing. What I am trying to learn after I ask that question and get that answer is to accept I am powerless but I can talk to God about it. Your Higher Power is ever present and unchanging. So really we are never completely powerless it just can feel like we are.

When that train of whatever it is gets on the track- I have a choice if I want to stay on it. I have the ability to talk to the conductor. We can change course, slow the train down and eventually get off of it altogether. Like anything it just takes practice – everyday.

It’s important to stay in the present – I’m having to practice every day

“I have come to believe that all of my fears are false gods before me.” – Mary Casey (A Woman’s Spirit)

“Any fear I have today is of my choosing. Dwelling on God rather than on the fear will change every experience I have today.” (A Woman’s Spirit)