Today was a good and bad day for me. I had a bad manic episode which landed me in the hospital for the past few months. I thought it was the end of the world again and did some stupid stuff about it. Today my Aunt and Uncle braved the long drive to get me out and come home. On the way home we found out my baby boy Link got away from the dog sitters and got picked up by the the humane society that is making it really difficult to get him out. I am so disappointed but am trying to stay hopeful that everything is going to work out.
For a long time , most of my life, I have loved God. As I have matured and learned so much about matters of organic energy and matters of the spirit I have learned through personal experience how important it is to have s personal relationship. A relationship no one outside of myself can define. No book or written word. Sometimes just the sound of aspen leaves blowing in the wind. Always present. Recently I made a choice I had been straddling the fence about for many years. I decided to surrender my soul to Jesus Christ….not in the book but the one I have come to know through a personal relationship. In the sky, God and the Earth my mother…our shared mother and once they made a son. I don’t believe he left such is not the way of this system as I understand it. Too many words. Human beings trying to make sense of things as they had understanding at the time. Words of the time that have changed in ours. So many translations. So many individual perceptions. We are in the one circle. Sometimes mythology is our only comfort in times of great loss and confusion.
This morning I had an interesting dream. There was a woman I had a conflict with and she got so angry with me. We exchanged words and I thought that was it but then she started to slap my face faster than is even humanly possible. She was so angry! But I stood still and let her do it until finally she stopped. To me this was biblical. No matter what was going on, I stood my ground and didn’t retaliate against her. Something she did not expect me to do.
Matthew 5:38-40New International Version
Eye for Eye
38 “You have heard that it was said, ‘Eye for eye, and tooth for tooth.’[a](A)39 But I tell you, do not resist an evil person. If anyone slaps you on the right cheek, turn to them the other cheek also.(B)40 And if anyone wants to sue you and take your shirt, hand over your coat as well.
When I was growing up my Mom used to get very angry with me. I don’t want to go into it out of respect for her. She used to get so mad at me she would “see red.” I had to, later, learn to empathize with why she may have done some things she did AND because of those things she made me a survivor. She had a lot that made her the way she was and that influenced who I was but at the end of the day I had a choice. I could choose to not forgive her and lose the only Mom God gave me or forgive and not waste any more time feeding darkness that comes of it.
Imagine waiting nearly a whole life time to hear your father tell you he loved you……as I recall it this was the case for her. On his deathbed!
God needed me to be tough to survive these times. No matter what I have endured, I wouldn’t change a thing……even my mother’s suicide. This world was too tough for her and she wanted to be with Jesus. She has been my mother in other ways with his help. I just had to make s conscious decision about my soul and surrender.
Today many will be choosing to experience fellowship about Jesus indoors. I will be going to a park. The energy inside of many enclosed spaces, when other people are there, is difficult for me. Bless all of you today.
Sometimes people smile but they are a black hole sun.
A message from A Woman’s Spirit today. I want to emphasize that as I share this I’m thinking of you men folk too! Everyone struggles at some degree with self-esteem and the God of our understanding, for me Jesus Christ, stands ready to help:
I always thought some people were just born with self- esteem and others not. The fact is, the people with self-esteem May have learned to develop it sooner than others, and now it’s my turn. -Laurel Lewis
One element of our growth is making new choices for ourselves. One of our choices is to have the self-esteem that is our right as a human being.
Some women may have never struggled with low self-esteem. Certainly, many women were born into families where unconditional love helped to develop the kind of self-esteem we crave. Yet with the help of this program and our Higher Power, we too will begin to feel a full measure of self-esteem.
Having self-esteem is really nothing more than beginning to understand and then accepting our worthiness in this vast panorama called life. We have always mattered to God and our fellow travelers, or we wouldn’t be here. It’s our beliefs that need to change-nothing more. We are worthy and loved children of God.
Self-esteem does not have to elude me today. My worth is guaranteed. God doesn’t make junk!
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Matthew 13:44-46New International Version
The Parables of the Hidden Treasure and the Pearl
44 “The kingdom of heaven is like(A) treasure hidden in a field. When a man found it, he hid it again, and then in his joy went and sold all he had and bought that field.(B)
45 “Again, the kingdom of heaven is like(C) a merchant looking for fine pearls. 46 When he found one of great value, he went away and sold everything he had and bought it.
Hello to you. How are you? I’m doing ok. Frustrated with myself. Tried to fit into a pair of jeans I’ve had for so many years this morning and nope! Too bloated. There is a Dr. Guidry and others that say the culprit is probably leaky gut syndrome. I am trying to eat better but still taking in too much processed food that is heavy on salt. It’s hard when your living alone to want to cook for yourself and if you do, avoid having a lot of waste. I am working with God about this and my body. Our microme- gut bacteria gets trained up early on in our lives. I notice for myself, that my body likes to eat a lot of protein. Much of the protein I ate as a young person came from meat. I want to change that. I am seeking a protein that does for me what meat does without involving the suffering and death of food animals. I have explored stuff like Quinoa and coconut milk. God and I will figure this out!
Yesterday I was looking into water filter technology and there is a lot of innovation out there. The Achilles heal to much of it – what to do with what is filtered out of water. The byproduct of most filtration tech is dirty filters and stuff you have to figure out what to do with. Desalinization – brine. What O read is a lot of the byproduct gets put back where the water came from! This doesn’t make any sense. It’s like seeing no trash someplace and forgetting there is a landfill somewhere brimming over with trash! Out of sight out of mind. If I have water delivered to my house it’s still not solving the problem. How about working on putting less crap in our drinking water to begin with? Will there ever be a day we feel safe drinking from the tap? Kind of felt like I was chasing my tail yesterday about this issue and so many others. Fix one thing, answer one question and there is something else to consider. Thinking something, a decision, all the way through isn’t easy but necessary. Making hasty decisions oftentimes is a catalyst for more problems to arise. Some enjoy that – profiting from making problems and then making more money coming up with solutions. I call that profit from misery. If problems are preventable then we should work on that. Doing what is right isn’t easy always but it can be rewarding!
Sometimes things are not what they seem – sometimes we have to look deeper than what the surface shows us. Flies are considered a pest but what I figured out is they are a lot like us. They get hungry , thirsty, want to reproduce and most of all are very curious. We are taught many things that just aren’t always true. Be willing and God will show you the truth of just about anything.
Hello to you today. How are you? I hope you are well and if your not, believe me your not alone.
What’s up there? Crab apples growing all over and they don’t taste too bad! Part of the litter problem comes after trash day – getting out of the garbage trucks I think this is a Yucca plant – Yucca is a genus of perennial shrubs and trees in the family Asparagaceae, subfamily Agavoideae. Its 40–50 species are notable for their rosettes of evergreen, tough, sword-shaped leaves and large terminal panicles of white or whitish flowers. They are native to the hot and dry parts of the Americas and the Caribbean. Wikipedia
This morning I got to thinking about a phrase I hear a lot, “Our thoughts and prayers are with you.” If so many thoughts and prayers are happening why does it seem like so little meaningful change has occurred? What came to me is if there is no conviction and intent on action behind the thoughts…the prayers…. so nothing changes. A lot of us say we care but are still firmly entrenched in our own way of things. Our thoughts remaining true to our own perception and desires and prayers empty rhetoric we are “expected” to say when tragedy befalls us, no matter what it is. Many sorry something bad is happening but unless it directly affects them – no intention of taking action to change. I’m not innocent in this but I am aware of my character defects and trying to follow up thoughts and prayers…words, with action. God provides but will not do it all for us – that’s in part why WE are here! Even doing just one small thing, starting today, can change the world. Open the eyes God placed in our hearts not just the ones in your head.
Matthew 5:8New International Version
8 Blessed are the pure in heart,(A) for they will see God.(B)
As I look back over my journey thus far and look at the landscape of the world, one of the biggest obstacles seems to be money. For what we need to happen and as fast as it needs to happen, what seems to be in the way is funds. I keep reading and hearing, “it costs too much.” An idea that came to mind was “blank check.” What would happen if we collaborated via teams of our best representing all the different crisis areas and said, all accountabilities in place, “do whatever it takes to fix this, we’ll get you whatever you need.” How fast could people like Boyan Slat from Ocean Cleanup get things done if the obstacle of financing was removed?
“(What’s So Funny ‘Bout) Peace Love And Understanding”
As I walk on through this wicked world Searching for light in the darkness of insanity I ask myself, “Is all hope lost?” Is there only pain, and hatred, and misery?
And each time I feel like this inside There’s one thing I wanna know What’s so funny ’bout peace, love, and understanding? What’s so funny ’bout peace, love, and understanding?
And as I walked on through troubled times My spirit gets so downhearted sometimes So where are the strong? And who are the trusted? And where is the harmony? Sweet harmony
‘Cause each time I feel it slipping away, just makes me wanna cry What’s so funny ’bout peace, love, and understanding? What’s so funny ’bout peace, love, and understanding?
So where are the strong? And who are the trusted? And where is the harmony? Sweet harmony
‘Cause each time I feel it slipping away, just makes me wanna cry What’s so funny ’bout peace, love, and understanding? What’s so funny ’bout peace, love, and understanding? What’s so funny ’bout peace, love, and understanding?
More and more science proves something extraordinary happened for us to have this today. They can’t replicate what it took to make this dimensional image appear on cloth
Hello to you. How are you? Lots going on everywhere these days. Lots of people expressing themselves, myself included, in a lot of words and feelings but little actual action. My Grandpa Becker was a man of God when he was here serving as a pastor and actively worked, along with my Grandma for civil rights….human rights. This morning I am remembering a little thing he used to say to me all the time, “put your money where your mouth is.” There are many who want to save unborn babies but when it comes to being willing to help take care of the children and adults they eventually become they aren’t as concerned. ALOT of charities all over the world trying to do things – lots of money changing hands and yet conditions are still horrible for many of our worlds people. I would like to see more collaboration of efforts – trying to decide which charity, how many charities is overwhelming. What I see coming for the United States, if states actually are serious about caring for life…quality of life in all aspects….there going to have to raise taxes. The money to raise the children you are demanding to be brought here has to come from somewhere. Are you prepared for what more life means? More mouths to feed, educate, clothe, shelter, provide proper healthcare, trash, clean drinkable water, food resources, safety, infrastructure like roads and energy suppliers, clean air….are you prepared to pay? Nothing is free. Nothing ultimately “cheap.” Look back and how well have we done so far? Are you ALL prepared? You want to protect life – prove it by your actions not just rhetoric and empty promises.
You can do your own research but what I see is fragmentation of a world with the same issues. A lot of redundancy in effort…finances going on. More “life”…more responsibility. We have the same basic needs the world over. For example water and food. Gotta have water to get the food. So many separate agencies trying to do the same missions – some trustworthy and some not making it a risky thing sometimes to try and donate money to help.
These links here are just a fraction of information available to help you see the big picture I’m trying to show you:
This from actor Jonathan Roumie, Jesus in The Chosen series, is some living water for these times. Like I asked you yesterday, what would Jesus do faced with the world of our times? I’m pretty certain he’d be praying about it all. It’s beautiful to hear Aramaic, Jesus’s primary language;
