What change, big or small, would you like your blog to make in the world?
Hello to you. How are you? I’m just off of a video conference with my medicine doctor. We are doing some changes to accommodate for sleep and weight gain. He thinks we need to switch out the olanzapine for Haldol and he wants to add Ambien as needed at night for sleep. I keep waking up in the night. Last night it was 11, 1 and 4 am! We are still seeking the right combination.
What kind of influence do I hope for by doing this blog? My hope has always been that if I reach and help at least one person – even if it’s just me – then I have accomplished my mission! There are a lot of people in the world like me that feel alone and bereft of any kind of support. Look at what Sinead O’Connor went through while she was alive? !! Then she dies mysteriously and the world all the suddenly cares! Her story is an all too common one for people diagnosed with mental illness. Love and try to understand – be empathetic and compassionate while the person is here among the living! Don’t wait til they are gone. In many cases too soon!
1 Peter 5:7New International Version
7 Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.
Hello to you. How are you? I’m just back from my weekly prayer group and getting my blood drawn to check my Depakote levels. It was nice to be able to just drive up the road to get the blood work done instead of going all the way to Boise. Looking forward to this afternoon and helping out with a hotdog event for the church at Middle Creek Elementary School. I will be helping to serve the hot dogs.
Todays prompt provokes thoughts of a lot of “what if’s.” What if my birth mother had not taken her life- would I even be writing to you right now? I would not have met my stepmother and all her family. I wouldn’t of probably been as close to my Grandparents. Would I have ever been in the Mental Health system at all? So much of an alternate universe for me depends on the very beginning of my life and the subsequent choices I made growing up. In an alternate universe I’m pretty sure I would of had at least one child. I would probably still be married because I wouldn’t have the Bipolar diagnosis going on or if I did it would be under control.
I envision alternate universe where there would be no hunger, no poverty, clean affordable food and water for everyone, affordable shelter, clean affordable and sustainable energy to meet all our needs, flying cars with auto pilot functions, everyone would be healthier but if you did get sick, you would have access to affordable and trustworthy medical care. I think of so many science fiction movies and television shows that have healing chambers or hand held healing devices. In an alternate universe where the needs of the people were put before arms and war making – life would be great! I feel like we should be much further along in our development as a country – as a world.
Where is the Med-Bay from the movie Elysian? Medical tricoder from Star Trek Next Generation
I still have hope in living to see the world I envision manifest into reality! Jesus was the divine physician.
Matthew 8:1-4New International Version
Jesus Heals a Man With Leprosy
8 When Jesus came down from the mountainside, large crowds followed him. 2 A man with leprosy[a] came and knelt before him and said, “Lord, if you are willing, you can make me clean.”
3 Jesus reached out his hand and touched the man. “I am willing,” he said. “Be clean!”Immediately he was cleansed of his leprosy.4 Then Jesus said to him, “See that you don’t tell anyone. But go, show yourself to the priest and offer the gift Moses commanded, as a testimony to them.”
Hello to you. Hope this finds you well. I wanted to share something that happened to me yesterday. I was scrolling and came across something that made me stop. There is a device someone invented to make music out of the energy signature of plants. It’s really cool. They clip the device to a plant or tree and the energy signature makes music. Well yesterday I stopped and listened and noticed the language on the pot looked like the stuff I saw in the dream I shared with you. I’m not sure what language it is – do you know? If you do please leave a comment!
11 Then God said, “Let the land produce vegetation: seed-bearing plants and trees on the land that bear fruit with seed in it, according to their various kinds. ” And it was so.
Hello to you. It’s Tuesday and another lovely day. We got some much needed rain again yesterday – I even took a walk in it! No scary dreams last night just something about paying out money to family to include my parents lol. What strange movies the brain makes!
The title of my blog today is me being in observer mode and seeing a pattern with the world. We’ve had dark days before and come through but will we come through these? There is a lot of stuff on social media I’m seeing that is painting a dark confusing picture. This is nothing new really. These are the worst of times. These are the best of times. These are confusing times – which way to go?! Everything is put on us all at once- thank you internet! We have major cities being taken over by homeless who are on drugs, AI and robots taking over the world, inflation, an election coming up, increased veterinary fees, no access or little access to decent medical care, war, weird stuff going on with the beings living in the oceans and seas and now aliens…on and on! No wonder the average American is burned out and doesn’t care! Most people just tune it all out and don’t pay attention unless what’s happening directly affects them. So many people are in survivor mode!
As Christian’s and children of God we must keep our lights on even as hard as it can be. Earth school is definitely in session! I’m glad I’ve chosen team Jesus. There is hope in him and his promises.
Psalm 18:28New International Version
28 You, Lord, keep my lamp burning; my God turns my darkness into light.
A couple areas of interest I pay attention to is animals and robotics. Both categories don’t have a very good track record with regards to rights:
Euthanized animal statistics – we’ve got to do better!
On average, 1.5 million shelter animals are euthanized every year in the United States. Shelters around the country euthanize an estimated 670,000 dogs and 860,000 cats each year. 45% of all cats who enter shelters are eventually euthanized.Jul 11, 2023
Hello to you. How are you? Todays prompt is tough for me as I think it’s been since before my divorce I’ve been truly happy. Last night I dreamt about being with my ex and we were so happy in the dream he suggested we put our wedding rings back on- talk about my brain manufacturing wishful thinking! Yet it was so vivid and romantic! Truth be told though that ship has definitely sailed. As the years pass since the divorce the more I have come to believe that Kyle was it for me. I always said if I couldn’t make things work with him I would end up alone. Being Bipolar 1 has been a marriage/relationship killer for me.
So what makes me happy? Let’s see – food like desserts, Link, my family, a good movie or television show, a good song, nature (especially flowers and clouds), Jesus – experiencing him at Church and in the world, helping others and that’s about it. Can’t come up with 30!
Something I want to mention happened this past Sunday at church both moved me and made me happy. We were singing and I stopped to look around and I almost started to cry. I thought what if this is like heaven? The song we were singing was Blessed Assurance. One of the reasons I almost cried too was hearing a little girl behind me singing her little heart out! So sweet! I just got to thinking about what heaven might be like. A place where there is peace – no fighting – and a lot of beautiful music all day long every day. I miss singing next to my Mom and Dad at church. The Catholic Church has such beautiful hyms,
Blessed assurance, Jesus is mine! Oh, what a foretaste of glory divine! Heir of salvation, purchase of God Born of his Spirit, washed in His blood
This is my story, this is my song Praising my Savior all the day long This is my story, this is my song Praising my Savior all the day long
Perfect submission, perfect delight Visions of rapture now burst on my sight Angels descending bring from above Echoes of mercy, whispers of love
This is my story, this is my song Praising my Savior all the day long This is my story, this is my song Praising my Savior all the day long Praising my Savior all the day long
I know that there is nothing better for people than to be happy and to do good while they live. 13 That each of them may eat and drink, and find satisfaction in all their toil-this is the gift of God.
Hello to you. How has your weekend been? I’m just back from church. We spent some time I psalm 139. The pervading message is God knows everything about us from beginning to end. Pastor Jayson talked a little bit about why so bad things happen and part of it is the sin that is in our world and part of it is what we do with our bad experiences after they happen. In many cases we are given the opportunity to help others who are going through or about to go through similar circumstances. Such has been the case for me. In my brokenness I have been made a stronger person in many ways and I know my boundaries better. I have a long resume of bad things I’ve been through! When most anyone going through a hard time, with the exception of parenting, approaches me I have empathy and some experience to share. Oh and praise God more rain today!
Changing gears:
The sacred space in the dream kind of looked like this only the space was surrounded by pitch black.
Before bed last night I asked God to show me the truth about him. I wanted and asked for a dream that I would remember. It’s been a long time since having a memorable dream. Well I fell asleep and dreamt I was looking at an altar like space in the dark. There were decorations and symbols made out of what looked like plastic. It almost looked like a wedding altar – everything was white and gold. It felt like a sacred space and I said that before walking in to it. I was self aware in the dream – almost like a lucid dream. When I walked into the space I got chills all over my body – the hairs stood up. Then I immediately felt this pulling sensation that frightened me – like an unseen force was touching me and I screamed “Don’t touch me! Don’t touch me! No!” I scared Link screaming myself awake. I guess I got scared because I was being touched by an unseen energy like some scary dreams I’ve had before. What was being shown to me? Was it something to be so afraid of? I will keep asking God for clarification and try not to be afraid!
Psalm 139 – the only bad part of this psalm is about hating those who hate God. I don’t hate anyone!
For the director of music. Of David. A psalm.
1 You have searched me, Lord, and you know me. 2 You know when I sit and when I rise; you perceive my thoughts from afar. 3 You discern my going out and my lying down; you are familiar with all my ways. 4 Before a word is on my tongue you, Lord, know it completely. 5 You hem me in behind and before, and you lay your hand upon me. 6 Such knowledge is too wonderful for me, too lofty for me to attain.
7 Where can I go from your Spirit? Where can I flee from your presence? 8 If I go up to the heavens, you are there; if I make my bed in the depths, you are there. 9 If I rise on the wings of the dawn, if I settle on the far side of the sea, 10 even there your hand will guide me, your right hand will hold me fast. 11 If I say, “Surely the darkness will hide me and the light become night around me,” 12 even the darkness will not be dark to you; the night will shine like the day, for darkness is as light to you.
13 For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb. 14 I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. 15 My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place, when I was woven together in the depths of the earth. 16 Your eyes saw my unformed body; all the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be. 17 How precious to me are your thoughts,[a] God! How vast is the sum of them! 18 Were I to count them, they would outnumber the grains of sand— when I awake, I am still with you.
19 If only you, God, would slay the wicked! Away from me, you who are bloodthirsty! 20 They speak of you with evil intent; your adversaries misuse your name. 21 Do I not hate those who hate you, Lord, and abhor those who are in rebellion against you? 22 I have nothing but hatred for them; I count them my enemies. 23 Search me, God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. 24 See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting.
Hello to you. How are you? I’m feeling pretty good – got some sleep last night and there were even dreams I don’t remember. Yesterday I got two walks in – forced myself to go. It’s so easy to say I’ll do it later! With the medication I’m on it’s easy to put weight on and almost impossible to take it off. Next Monday I will be doing a chair yoga class through the VA. Hopefully the start of a positive new habit! Just got to keep moving!
Every time I see a sunflower I think of my ex. We were walking and at a stop sign there was a sun flower and he noticed it. “Stop and See” pay attention to the beauty around you. I stopped on my walk last night to see these beauties.
What am I curious about? A little bit of everything! I enjoy seeing what science gets up to. Lately in the headlines there has been a lot of discussion around a claim coming out of South Korea in regards to super conductors: Superconductivity is a set of physical properties observed in certain materials where electrical resistance vanishes and magnetic flux fields are expelled from the material. Any material exhibiting these properties is a superconductor. Wikipedia Watching a piece of metal hover and move like a UFO is really intriguing. There were several headlines about this the past couple of days which leads me to believe it’s connected to what we are hearing about reversed engineering in extraterrestrial technology. The timing of this release doesn’t seem coincidental to me. I feel like we are being prepared for a bigger story and are being fed bite size portions like infants. You have to be paying attention. If this technology is valid and peer reviewed we could see flying cars and other changes to the power grid very soon. I think the work Of Nikola Tesla is finally getting proven – about free energy being everywhere – ambient energy is a tangible thing – just how to harness it without adverse consequences in the quantities we need it in.
STATE-OF-ART MATERIAL (excerpt go to link for full article)
A superconductor can levitate in a magnetic field and conduct electricity with zero resistance, thus having no loss of energy – a conventional conductor gets hot because it has resistance and generates heat.
It is touted as a state-of-art material that can speed up connections between computer chips, strengthen the electromagnetic field for magnetic resonance imaging (MRI) scanners and provide higher efficiency to power grids and maglev railways. However, the cryogenic environment has been a major obstacle to commercializing the material.
It was in 1911 when the world’s first superconductivity was discovered by Dutch researcher and Nobel laureate Heike Kamerlingh-Onnes at 4.2 Kelvin, which is -452.1 Fahrenheit or -269 degrees Celsius. Today, a high-temperature superconductor is discovered above 77 Kelvin, -321.1 Fahrenheit or -196.2 degrees Celsius.
There have been many trials to prove room-temperature superconductors. In 2020, a research team led by Ranga Dias, assistant professor of the mechanical engineering department at University of Rochester, claimed they had found superconductivity at 287 Kelvin, 56.9 Fahrenheit or 13.9 degrees Celsius. But the team’s paper was retracted by the prominent magazine Nature in 2022 due to low confidence in the scientific results.
I think science is interesting but I believe it’s a bottom line quest to explain our existence. Science is like a religion – a quest for God – to be God. I could be wrong but that’s how it’s always seemed to me. The quest for the Why of every tiny detail of existence. I was watching some videos about the CERN Haldron Collider last night and it’s pretty scary what they are doing! https://youtu.be/6IH012umOjQ – CERN Scientists Claim They Have Opened a Portal to Another Dimension. In the absence of a tangible God, science through numbers and equations seeks to explain what just generates more questions and it seems like a competition to see who’s smarter! I wonder if the field of science is almost just a way for smart people not to be bored. If you look at nature there are so many answers to the Why and What of God! Just this spring and all the flowers filled me with wonder and joy. It’s seems that is too simple for a scientist. They need microscope’s and Petri dishes, charts and grafts, tiny particles and multiverses!
When I was having some of my episodes every question had more than one answer – it was exhausting! I would sit in my closet going round and round for hours. I imagine if I had been in a lab such an occurrence would be exhilarating but it wasn’t. If you have ever seen the Dr. Who episode with the Editor – it was like being one of those people receiving all the information through my third eye (the space between the eyebrows) I was thinking so much that area hurt! Only God, the energy that is at the center of all creation, knows how all the pieces fit together. It’s too much for any one person to know!
So anyways I am curious about a lot of things. It will be interesting to see if this discovery out of South Korea pans out. We really could benefit as a world – much more quickly.
I’m also curious about passages like this in the Bible. When I read it it makes me wonder what exactly they were seeing. It makes me think of people trying to describe UFO/UAP encounters! Sometimes there aren’t words from our times to explain things. Think about what it must have been like for our earliest ancestors when they witnessed lightening and thunder:
Ezekiel 1:5-11New International Version
5 and in the fire was what looked like four living creatures. In appearance their form was human,6 but each of them had four faces and four wings. 7 Their legs were straight; their feet were like those of a calf and gleamed like burnished bronze. 8 Under their wings on their four sides they had human hands. All four of them had faces and wings, 9 and the wings of one touched the wings of another. Each one went straight ahead; they did not turn as they moved.
10 Their faces looked like this: Each of the four had the face of a human being, and on the right side each had the face of a lion, and on the left the face of an ox; each also had the face of an eagle. 11 Such were their faces. They each had two wings spreading out upward, each wing touching that of the creature on either side; and each had two other wings covering its body.
Write about a random act of kindness you’ve done for someone.
Hello to you. How are you? I’m feeling pretty good. I spoke with my doctor yesterday and we worked out a plan. I will be doubling my dose of Depakote (1000mg) and going back to 10 mg of the Olanzapine at night. I’m not going to be taking the Abilify. I will also have the olanzapine for as needed as sometimes that happens. I was grateful he called me back! It felt like an answered prayer as I was feeling pretty left out there. Prayer said out loud in a group really works fast!
I like todays prompt but I can’t remember specific times I’ve done it! It’s a combination of it being a long time since I’ve had a *mission and being taught not to toot your own horn! Don’t let your left hand know what your right hand is doing kind of thing. I’m sure I’ve done good things but I’m so in the moment I forget later what I’ve done. When I was younger and had more energy I used to do a lot more – my ex and I liked helping people together. On my own I can remember paying someone’s toll. When I was working with the homeless I can remember giving them a ride a couple times. I remember my ex telling me a couple stories. He helped a guy at a gas station with a ride and once he was at the video game store and the person in front of him was short a dollar. He paid the dollar. Well that very same day I was cutting the lawn guess what blew into the yard? A dollar bill!
*When I talk about a mission I’m talking about those times when I’ve spontaneously decided to go somewhere and it’s like a God thing. I’m exactly where and when I’m supposed to be there. It’s usually meeting someone who needs me or that person will have a message for me.
Matthew 6:3New International Version
3 But when you give to the needy, do not let your left hand know what your right hand is doing,
I was looking through my spiritual playlist on my YouTube channel and this was at the top. Dr. Emoto’s work with water is very inspiring:
Hello to you – how are you? I’m just back from meeting with our church’s prayer team. I asked the members to pray for me. I am having problems with my new medication which causes anxiety. I tried to get in touch with my doctors nurse yesterday but was unsuccessful! I was able to get an appointment scheduled earlier which is good.
My morning boy Fruit tree This looks like a miniature peach My neighbors bush is still blooming these lovely flowers
I’m grateful for our prayer team. Going each Thursday gives me a purpose. I walk there and walk home. Going gives me a reason to pray and connect with Jesus with other followers. There is such a beautiful fellowship. We are up to four members now! Today we had a lot to pray for to include several people that have been missing due to health related issues. Our group leader has a call list and checks on many of the people. Today was our youngest members Briana’s 29th birthday!
1 John 1:7New International Version
7 But if we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus, his Son, purifies us from all[a]sin.
What traditions have you not kept that your parents had?
Hello there – how are you? Last night I decided to see if it’s the abilify that is causing me to be anxious and run fast – affect my sleep. I took two Depakote instead – sure enough I was able to sleep and feel like I rested. I think my body is used to it. The abilify makes me feel too high. I need to talk to my doctor about all this. I called and left a message for the pharmacist that gave me tapering off instructions from the olanzapine which I wasn’t able to do because I ran out of it and they didn’t refill it. Hopefully she will call me back today.
Todays prompt makes me think of Christmas. My parents and my ex and I used to have a tradition of telling each other what specifically we wanted for Christmas and that’s what we would get. My Mom used to send holiday treats up until a year ago or so. With Dad being in a nursing home things have changed and understandably so. We don’t exchange gifts anymore – just cards. Since moving here to Idaho, I have been indoctrinated into new traditions for the family here. They are similar to what I grew up with but slightly different. They do a white elephant gift exchange where everyone brings a gift of $25 or more and they do a trade.
Psalm 18:1-2New International Version
1 I love you, Lord, my strength.
2 The Lord is my rock, my fortress and my deliverer; my God is my rock, in whom I take refuge, my shield[b] and the horn[c] of my salvation, my stronghold.
I love You, Lord For Your mercy never fails me All my days, I’ve been held in Your hands From the moment that I wake up Until I lay my head Oh, I will sing of the goodness of God
And all my life You have been faithful And all my life You have been so, so good With every breath that I am able Oh, I will sing of the goodness of God
I love Your voice You have led me through the fire In the darkest night You are close like no other I’ve known You as a Father I’ve known You as a Friend And I have lived in the goodness of God (yeah)
And all my life You have been faithful (oh) And all my life You have been so, so good With every breath that I am able Oh, I will sing of the goodness of God (yeah)
‘Cause Your goodness is running after It’s running after me Your goodness is running after It’s running after me With my life laid down I’m surrendered now I give You everything ‘Cause Your goodness is running after It’s running after me (oh-oh)
‘Cause Your goodness is running after It’s running after me Your goodness is running after It’s running after me With my life laid down I’m surrendered now I give You everything ‘Cause Your goodness is running after It keeps running after me
And all my life You have been faithful And all my life You have been so, so good With every breath that I am able Oh, I’m gonna sing of the goodness of God (I’m gonna sing, I’m gonna sing)
‘Cause all my life You have been faithful And all my life You have been so, so good With every breath that I am able Oh, I’m gonna sing of the goodness of God Oh, I’m gonna sing of the goodness of God
To be 