10 Sept 2025 The Abyss

Hello there! How are you? I hope this finds you well. The back pain is back but I’m trying not to focus on it! I appreciate your prayers!

Last night I had a good telephone call with a friend and we talked about something I haven’t talked about here for awhile. It was about the abyss that exists in all of us that we often unsuccessfully try to fill with worldly things. When I was an alcoholic, I used alcohol to try and fill myself up. When I was a fan girl for a musician or actor I filled myself up with their music and films. It was all so fleeting! It was an obsession.

Millions of people are rabid fans of people like Yungblud, Lady Gaga, Ozzie Osbourne, and Taylor Swift. Back in the day for me it was Prince, David Bowie, Benedict Cumberbatch and Jonathan Rhys Meyers. I drew their images and followed everything they did. There works temporarily filled the void inside me. When David and Prince died it left a huge void in me and was part of one of my manic episodes. Davids music got me through so many hard times especially my teens. It was a couple years ago that I realized my fandom was akin to idol worship and I pulled the plug on all of it. There is only one king worthy of worship! Once I completely surrendered to Jesus nothing else mattered. I realized these celebrities were almost acting like they were Gods – trying to be immortal , omnipresent and making a lot of money off of their worshippers! They are famous because we give them our time and lots of money. So many young people worship these performers and when times get tough they fall back on worshipping these celebrities instead of God. The celebrities are tangible to them whereas God doesn’t seem to be.

Only one thing fits into the void inside of me and that is God….things of the Spirit. I’ve known this for quite some time but I wandered off several times. As human beings we want a tangible “Jesus”. Like with The Chosens Jonathan Roumies Jesus. He is currently bringing a tangible Jesus to us. It’s tempting to fall into the idol trap. No matter how many times he emphasizes that he’s an actor portraying Jesus there will be those who think he’s the second coming! It must be so hard to be him right now in a world that so wants and needs Jesus to return.

Since I have put Jesus in the abyss that is inside me I know that I am never completely alone. I can talk to him anytime. A tangible Jesus lives and breathes through the people he has surrounded me with. My family and friends are the body of Jesus in my life.

Exodus 20:3-6New International Version

“You shall have no other gods before[a] me.

“You shall not make for yourself an image in the form of anything in heaven above or on the earth beneath or in the waters below. You shall not bow down to them or worship them; for I, the Lord your God, am a jealous God,punishing the children for the sin of the parents to the third and fourth generation of those who hate me, but showing love to a thousand generations of those who love me and keep my commandments.

Matthew 25:34-40New International Version

34 “Then the King will say to those on his right, ‘Come, you who are blessed by my Father; take your inheritance, the kingdom prepared for you since the creation of the world. 35 For I was hungry and you gave me something to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink, I was a stranger and you invited me in, 36 I needed clothes and you clothed me,I was sick and you looked after me, I was in prison and you came to visit me.’

37 “Then the righteous will answer him, ‘Lord, when did we see you hungry and feed you, or thirsty and give you something to drink? 38 When did we see you a stranger and invite you in, or needing clothes and clothe you? 39 When did we see you sick or in prison and go to visit you?’

40 “The King will reply, ‘Truly I tell you, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers and sisters of mine, you did for me.’

14 Nov 2023 Meeting

Who is the most famous or infamous person you have ever met?

Hello to you. I’m trying to get help with my medication. I’ve been taking more than I have been prescribed and am almost out again. I have just been so anxious and the olanzapine is the only thing that works to help calm me. I might have to go back in to the walk in clinic which sucks as I have to get someone to take me.

The most famous person I have had contact with is Jonathan Rhys Meyers and his wife Mara Lane. I sent him a fan letter and they responded. Which is very rare. The other famous person I saw at an airport was Lyle Alzado of the Oakland Raiders. The team came and sat in the restaurant my ex and I were sitting in. They were so big! Lyle was at his best – before he was sick from steroids. I knew as soon as he was walking by that “he was somebody!”

I need to get better about this!

Philippians 4:6-7 NIV

6 Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. 7 And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

12 May 2022 Travels of the Mind

Hello to you. How does today find you? I hope for your very best! My thanks to all who have been praying for me. I want you to know I’m praying for you too. We got this! At least I hope so. I did have a mild spooky experience last night – sensing a presence walking in the room – but I was able to go back to sleep. I dreamt about going to this place that was like an attraction of some sort and it was scary. There were energies I was trying to keep out. I couldn’t find the exit and strangest of all was being in this place with a morbidly obese Lady Gaga! Dreams like this aren’t very restful. It’s probably related to all those paranormal investigations I’ve watched.

Yesterday was a day of traveling in my mind. I found myself watching videos talking about how science is proving that the Shroud of Turin is genuine – it is Jesus Christ.

The Shroud of Turin – face of a bruised and battered Christ Source: Internet

I spent some time with musicians who have passed on and their families. One in particular was David Bowie. He’s been on my mind lately. His voice helped me survive my teenage years! I watched a cool video done by Vogue of his wife Iman sharing treasures from her home with David. She is a pretty amazing woman.

https://youtu.be/fk9cq3gRCP0 – Inside Iman and David Bowie Scenic Home Filled With Wonderful Objects

Another was Chris Cornell from Sound Garden and his daughter Toni. Yet another was actor Jonathan Rhys Meyers and his little family. The internet makes travels like this so easy! When I connect with a person they become part of me and I care about them. Famous people are no better than anyone else….. at the end of it all they are just people.

Passage that resonated yesterday

The other place my mind traveled was to Sacred Geometry. For those who have been visiting here awhile, you know I really like Metatrons Cube. Something funny with this is I found out yesterday that actor Alan Rickman was “the Metatron” in the movie Dogma!

https://youtu.be/LAn5Hwb7Y94 – Behold The Metatron (Dogma, Alan Rickman)

My orgonite Seed of Life Pendant : The basis of the Seed of Life is the circle, and in sacred geometry circles represent cycles, as well as encompassing things. In this case, the seven circles are often compared to the seven days of creation, with the different circles being ascribed to different points in the universe’s making.
https://lasertrees.com › blog › seed-…
SEED OF LIFE – LaserTrees

Let’s see what we have for a message in A Woman’s Spirit today:

I want to be loved, and for that to happen, I must love others and I must want love for them. – Betty MacDonald

Feeling love is so elusive. We savor the feeling when it comes, and we think if we hang on tightly, it won’t leave. But we must give love away if we want to keep feeling it. That is the paradox. It is also a principle we can rely on absolutely.

Feeling generous in spirit toward others gives us a powerful blessing in return. We quickly sense that whatever we feel toward the friends and associates in our lives we feel about ourselves. Carrying love for others in our hearts assured us of feeling loved too. It’s easier to understand once we begin utilizing this principle. What we give away, we get back.

I can influence whether or not I am loved by how I treat others today. What I sow I will reap.

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Song I found this morning that I didn’t know David had sung before:

https://youtu.be/hODALOTiH6A – David Gilmour, David Bowie, Richard Wright “Comfortably Numb”

Let’s go for a short walk:

My favorite of the day!
If you want to see beauty in this world you just need to make the choice to seek it.

21 February 2022 Monday

Check out 21 February 2022 Monday morning chat https://www.twitch.tv/videos/1305451504

Morning sky

Hello to you how are you? It’s Monday morning again and I’m finally starting to wake up. What’s happening is the Doxepin isn’t really working like I hoped and I am still having to take the Hydroxyzine which makes me groggy. I’ve also been having lower back and leg pain which makes it hard to get out of bed. I resolved to myself that I’m going to try to do more stretching through the day to see if that helps. There is a part of me considering a yoga class they have in town. I used to do yoga! I could even do a head stand!

The stream was fun this morning. One of my viewers was involved in a school musical production of Grease. We had fun with a couple of the songs. It’s been ages since I was a huge fan of the movie starring Olivia Newton John and John Travolta. The age group my viewer is in are like 11 and 12 year olds. As you may or may not remember there are a lot of mature themes in Grease. My viewer joked that one of the cast was talking about “huge knockers” and he probably didn’t even know what he was talking about! LOL!!

Yesterday I was in the mood to watch movies which has been extremely rare! The first movie was Black Butterfly starring Antonio Banderas and Jonathan Rhys Meyers. When I initially had heard about the movie and saw trailers I wasn’t interested. I’m so glad I watched it! I can’t believe it was free on You tube! https://youtu.be/-_VUHxa7nwg – Black Butterfly. I was delightfully surprised at all the plot twists. The other one I watched and enjoyed was called The Illusionist starring Edward Norton and Paul Giamatti : https://youtu.be/KunQC6a6fPU – The Illusionist. I don’t want to tell you what these films are about – don’t want to spoil the surprise that each of them has to offer! It felt good to have the movie experience and not have my manic/paranoid/delusional self reading too much into what what I was watching.

“Practiced consistently, new habits become who I am.” – Lin Andrukat (A Woman’s Spirit)

“Any current behavior used to be “new.” It became a habit only with continuous use. I can decide to begin a new behavior today. “ (A Woman’s Spirit)