Category: Money

23 November 2021 Twitch – Good Day

by saymber, posted in Bipolar life, Food, Leading Life by Example, Mental Health, Money, Spirituality and Religion, technology, Veteran Affairs, Writing and blogging

Hello! It’s morning here as I write to you. I just tried something new. Yesterday my therapist introduced me to Twitch to try and help me with my lonelys problem and so this morning I did a Livestream for a few minutes to try it out. If you use Twitch you can use the search to find me at jwygant. It said I had a viewer but I think it was me lol. A lot of the views go to people with pretty polished presentations. Yesterday I really enjoyed hearing live violin music. One site called Artesianbuilds is watching high end computer builds. From my experience so far, I think I can recommend Twitch.

Yesterday was really a good day. I can honestly say I enjoyed my own company which is rare for me to say! I had a good session with my therapist and on the way home I got groceries and gas in the car (both expensive but can’t be helped! It cost me what I usually pay for a full tank for just a half of a tank). I was planning on bringing green bean casserole to Thanksgiving but couldn’t find the ingredients! So I picked up a key lime pie that should be good.

I have scheduled a Meetup group for the 4th of December (Connect Middleton ID). I don’t expect much since it’s the holiday season but can’t hurt to try. I have to keep it going since I’m paying for it! If you know about Meetup and would like to visit it’s free. RSVP!

I feel like I’m swirling back to a place I’ve been before. A few years ago I was doing videos I called Morning Coffee With Jackie. I did it on YouTube. I kind of got lost in the abyss and gave it up. May be I’ll try something like that on Twitch. I keep thinking of Mr Rogers Neighborhood. May be I can be a friendly face in the crowd. I’m not looking to make money just reaching out. We will see where things go.

“There are three ways to ultimate success: The first way is to be kind. The second way is to be kind. The third way is to be kind.” – Fred Rogers

9 November 2021 Living

by saymber, posted in Art and Poetry, Bipolar life, Money, Politics and Government, Spirituality and Religion, Veteran Affairs, Writing and blogging

Hello. How are you today? I’m writing a little bit earlier. It’s raining out and I’m grateful but not looking forward to going out in it. I opened the back door to let Link out and he was like “no way!”

So yesterday’s therapy session yielded some nuggets of truth. One was I have an issue with control and the other being patient enough to see what God has planned for me. My therapist shared a powerful quote/message with me, “May be God doesn’t show us his entire plan for us because we’d try to get there by ourselves.” When I was having my episodes with full life reviews using objects in the house to symbolize people, places, things I just didn’t rest. They were like pieces on an elaborate game board. There was always one more move. The message from my therapist is so true. The game of each life is so intricate that in the flesh we just can’t handle it all at once. I wasn’t sleeping. I didn’t want to eat much. I wasn’t spending quality time with my husband or my pets.

I’m so glad the episodes have stopped but my wanting to control everything hasn’t! The control issue goes back to my childhood. My extreme expression of wanting control was my becoming anorexic and bulemic. The bulemia lasted in to my 30’s! I hold on too tight to life. The challenge for me at this phase of life is to let Gods more. I’m not in charge of everything!

After I got home I walked to Rockin M Salon to get a haircut. It was good to see Trina again. she had recently moved from in town to a hobby farm in Emmett. Apparently Middleton has some of the highest taxes in the state. It would have been nice to know that before I moved here! In the past few months she’s lost like 10 clients. That’s significant! I hope I don’t get any surprises at tax time !

“Little child let me take the reigns. Trust me to guide you and alleviate your pains. There are to many pieces for you to hold. I know you are afraid to get old. Let my presence soothe your fears. Let me wipe your tears. I am here. There is nothing to fear. “

24 October 2021 Sunday

by saymber, posted in dreams, Home, Leading Life by Example, Money, Nature, Spirituality and Religion, Veteran Affairs, Writing and blogging

Hello there! How are you? As I write to you it’s gray and wet. We are getting some much needed rain. I took some extra Vitamin D this morning to help out with SAD (seasonal affective disorder). I just want to hibernate like a big ol grizzly when the seasons change. It’s dark by 7 pm right now and the lights don’t really come back on til around 8 am!

So I’m hoping my drum arrives today. A friend of mine said his Amazon delivery hasn’t showed up . It was supposed to be at his place yesterday. I imagine this is the supply chain problem?!! It would be nice if they let people know there was a delay! A positive side to the delay is it gives me more time to think about things!

I had trouble falling asleep last night. I kept hearing drums in my head! I kept imagining the lawn chairs on my porch being filled with people playing a drum or some other musical instrument . Then my thoughts got bigger. They expanded out to seeing a group of people meeting at one of our local parks. I could see a community of like minded souls praising God together outside or inside if there was a place to do it.

“Start small. If you grow too big too fast you’ll fall.”

Is this a God thing? When your someone like me you have to be careful that passions aren’t just mania manifesting itself. I don’t want to plant this seed, in this case put money down to start a Meetup Group, and then lose interest. Judging by the fact there aren’t any groups for Middleton I’m nervous that I’m not going to reach the people here. I guess this is a time for faith. A belief in what can’t be seen. If this is God at work I have nothing to worry about and just have to practice what I preach! Patience!!

20 October 2021 Niche

by saymber, posted in Art and Poetry, drawing, Leading Life by Example, Money, Writing and blogging

Hello! How are you today? I didn’t want to get out of bed this morning. It’s real windy here. The clouds are playing with the leaves. It’s really quite magical to watch.

“When someone tells you to “find your niche,” they mean you should find the very specific activity or position that sets you apart and in which you can find success or fulfillment. … Much less commonly, niche can be used as a verb meaning to place something in this kind of niche.”

When I asked what I should write about this word came to mind. Lately I’ve been watching a lot of YouTube videos on how to make things . What I’ve noticed is when a particular video gets a lot of views there will be a bunch of other people who come behind trying to do the exact same thing. You see this in our economy too. It’s not enough that Crayola makes chalk and writing instruments. A bunch of other companies have to make them too and usually on the cheap.

“To each there is a message and a messenger.”

My niche has always been drawing and writing. Both over saturated worlds. I have been doing these things ever since I was like 4 of 5 years old when I would write short stories for my classmates. I used to spend hours drawing portraits and writing poems. Sadly in many ways I have regressed in my niche. I’m not as good as I should be by this stage of my life. I think it’s because I have never done what I do for a living. Nothing or no one has pushed me to be better.

I think we are all looking for our niche. Where do I belong? How do I fit into this complex puzzle of existence? Some people actually find it and lead fulfilled lives and others of us keep puttering along trying to find it. I believe a lot of people never find their niche or find it but haven’t the ways and means to break through and be seen. There are some who are seen and can’t handle what breaking through entails. There is a loss of self. There is a loss of the purity of why the niche began in the first place. From my own personal experience, money can taint a niche.

I am hoping, God willing, that I always will have my mental and physical faculties to be able to write and draw. Even if I reach just one other person I’ve accomplished something. It is validation enough that my particular flavor of niche is worth something. You will laugh but some days the only person reached is my own self! “What the hell is she going on about today?!!”

19 October 2021 Immortality

by saymber, posted in Art and Poetry, books, history, Money, Movies, Music, photography, Social media, Spirituality and Religion, technology, Television, Writing and blogging

Hello to you. How is your day going? I got out and did a lap around the neighborhood. I’ll probably need to go a little later to get a mile in. It’s so pretty out!

The past couple of days I’ve been watching AI interpretations of what people from old times would look like today. The reference material used is photographs, paintings, statues and even mummies. Yesterday as I watched a female mummy resurrected for a moment, I found myself asking was this what she had in mind being mummified? Did she and the people of her time know they would become immortals?

In our modern world there are so many ways for even the most poor to become immortal. In addition to all the traditional ways there are so many more now that we have AI. The problem that I see however is a lot of the new ways rely on systems that can fail. What if YouTube or Facebooks servers went down and data couldn’t be retrieved? I had an external hard drive that hit the tile one too many times. I can’t get the pictures, videos and documents unless I pay someone! What happens when you drop your cell phone and all your pictures were on it? Immortality of this age is so fragile!

As a child I wanted to be immortal. I wanted to be a famous singer, writer, dancer and artist. My stepmom said something profound about that though, she said “ Jackie you don’t have to be famous to be somebody.” Back then I was going to Catholic Church. There is a part of me that still longs for the immortality I wanted as a child. My grown up self knows those ships have sailed. The modern world of immortals is for the young even though those who are older have most of the money !

Something interesting in the world of AI and spirituality is the word SAVED. This word and concept is equally important in both worlds. It means immortality. For example there is an 8mm film I have of my family, all of them except my dad are deceased. When I watch it they live again. Through my living eyes they have life. They all believed in Jesus Christ. Without that video and other pictures of them that have been “saved” they would just be names on tombstones…..names written in bibles.

I’m at the time in my life when one starts to think of things like this. I have a trunk full of journals and drawings will they stand the test of time? Have I secured my immortality? Much of my hand written stuff is in cursive writing. In many schools they have stopped teaching cursive writing! I have no children to pass “myself” on to. Will my life just end up being a time capsule in a landfill?

What does immortality mean to you? Why do you do what you do in this life? Lately I have been questioning that a lot. It seems like our world is going through an identity crisis. Are we doing things that have meaning or just to survive? If we were able to do what we truly enjoy doing would we have so much consumerism? For some their immortality is in how many possessions they have.

“Through the veil comes a whisper,”remember me.”

15 October 2021

by saymber, posted in Bipolar life, In the News, Leading Life by Example, Mental Health, Money, Spirituality and Religion, Writing and blogging

Hello. How are you? I’m am doing ok – just real tired. I haven’t been sleeping that well. It was only once around the block today. I’m starting to feel like an old dog!! Must be the cold getting in my bones!

Yesterday I went over to my Aunt and Uncles house for linner (lunch/dinner). They had invited some of their friends and their daughter too . It was nice to have a home cooked meal with such good company. Playing a round of Farkle (dice game) which my Aunt won. Being with them helped me forget my troubles for awhile . For just a couple hours the world seemed happy and peaceful – normal. When I am with my family I feel so loved and cared about. I wish the whole world could know what that’s like. So many lives seem to be in a state of chaos right now.

When I look at the news lately everything is for shit. It’s like there isn’t any hope. Just more of the same crap – fear mongering and scare tactics. All the stuff love can’t buy but money can. If you pay attention to this stuff you have to ask where God is in all of it. I believe God is showing us just how broken we are.

All broken aside, I want to focus on the good stuff. I woke up today. I have wonderful family and friends. I have a roof over my head. Food in my belly. My health is pretty good yet. I have a sweet dog. I have transportation. I want to believe there is enough of what I need in this world. I want to believe my higher power has my back and is looking out for me. No matter how broken this world appears to be, there are moments like I had yesterday. People still caring about each other and coming together in fellowship and love.

So what are you grateful for today? What makes you happy ? How do you stay positive ? I’d love to hear from you!

12 October 2021 Tuesday

by saymber, posted in Bipolar life, Food, Home, In the News, Leading Life by Example, Money, Writing and blogging

Hello . How are you today? I am doing ok. I finally decided to go get groceries and it wasn’t cheap and a bit of a scavenger hunt. I spent $103 for just me. I was relieved that they had drinking water but it looked like the toilet paper aisle had been raided. I don’t envy the people that work there trying to keep the store shelves stocked !

So I found a YouTube channel that was interesting: Living Life in North Idaho. The host, Trent has lived in Idaho for 30 years and is a realtor. This video done just a day ago mentions Middleton: https://youtu.be/SxrTGg48npY . He does a variety of videos some of which I wish I had seen before deciding to move here!

I thought about buying Halloween candy today but decided not to. This is my first Halloween in the neighborhood and I don’t know what to expect . There are a lot of kids living here but I don’t know if they go trick or treating or if they are just going to go the trunk or treat route. I miss dressing up with my ex husband and handing out candy. We had a steam punk theme and I had my plasma lamp that I would bring out and light up light bulbs wirelessly!

Do you decorate and celebrate Halloween? I’d love to hear about it!

10 October 2021 Small Town

by saymber, posted in Home, In the News, Money, Writing and blogging

Hello again. This post will kind of tie in to my previous. I am having one of those days where I just need to write !

So I live in a small town in Idaho named Middleton. It’s near Nampa and Caldwell. We are going through a housing boom in this area. All around the existing “old town” people are building really expensive houses. We have one grocery store called Ridleys that all these new residents go to and I’ve noticed shortages especially of drinking water. Most people I know don’t drink water from the tap. They either have some kind of filtration system or they drink bottled water.

I never thought I would live in a world where you would have to pay twice for water . Pay the city so you can flush your toilet and pay the grocery store so you have water to drink. Drinking water is more precious than oil!

I moved to this town for a reason. One of the biggest is finding a house I could afford that wasn’t a complete dump. I considered renting an apartment but couldn’t afford it. For under $200,000 the only properties that were listed were the type flippers dream about . In some cases you would have to level the house to the ground and start over! The tiny house I found, a mere 734 sq ft, was a manufactured home which is hard to get a loan for but was still in my price range at $190,000. A lot of prayers were answered with my finding of the house!

So I live here now what! I haven’t figured out a way to connect with people here yet. The only people I know here in this state are my family. They all work or are busy with their own lives. I have considered starting a Meetup group but am not sure I want to swallow the $69 startup fee! Most Meetup groups are in the larger cities. I don’t want to have to drive all the way to Boise. I have nice neighbors but they mostly keep to themselves or each other. I’m the odd woman out – no husband and no kids.

There has to be a reason beyond this house for me being here. I just don’t know what it is yet. Something I really enjoyed doing for a time was helping people heal. May be once I’m completely back on my feet God will have a plan about that. May be part of my being here is to heal and get strong again. This small town might just be the refuge God wants for me right now .

10 October 2021

by saymber, posted in history, Home, human rights, In the News, Money, Spirituality and Religion, Writing and blogging

Hello to you . How are you? It’s Sunday. I’m writing to you from my little loveseat that I’m currently sharing with two little dogs. We have an overnight guest my Aunts dog named Smokey. Link and Smokey always have a good time together. Both of the dogs are part Maltese and very similar in temperament. They choose their people! If they don’t like you they let you know it!

Two friends

So I should go get groceries but I don’t wanna. I have enough milk to get me by til tomorrow. Truth be told I dread going to the grocery store. I’ve been reading about scarcity and have noticed it myself with things like water and milk. I never thought I would live in a time like this. Then again I never planned on living someplace that is experiencing such drastic growth either!

It’s all part of a phenomenon I’ve noticed for many years. I noticed it a lot when I lived in Colorado and also Florida….unbridled growth. People would visit these places and decide they just had to live there . When you get a bunch of people with this same bright idea before long what they initially loved is gone and paved over with concrete to accommodate all the people. They have destroyed a place with their love. It’s happening here in Idaho and from what it seems all over the country. My neighbor back in Texas told me they are putting in 200 more homes off a already burdened road .

Where are all these people coming from and why? My own move from Texas to Idaho was driven by a divorce. From my experience here buying a home, people are snapping up houses with cash – well over asking price. The only people that could do that have to be coming from higher cost of living places. A lot of the people I’ve heard are doing this are retirement age or close to retirement .

I’ve been reading about and seeing acres of farm land being turned to new subdivisions. I have also heard and read that we are having water shortages. I have to wonder what is the point of having a new house if there is no water to flow into it?!! Water is a finite resource. What is this state going to do to preserve its water resources?

Sigh……

The people that get hurt the most are the people who already live here. Their wages are not keeping up with the cost of living – rising rent and gas prices….everything costs more. A friend of mine was recently job hunting. He has a Masters degree. The jobs that came up only wanted to pay him the same or a little above what McDonald’s would pay a new employee! People have to have liveable wages ! There are shortages all over for jobs that don’t pay worth a darn and don’t offer medical and dental insurance.

It seems like our system is broken. Everything costs more now and I am not entirely sure why. Is is it that there are more people putting a burden on it? Is it due to poor resource management ? For example student debt for doctors . Would we be able to have more affordable healthcare if so many doctors didn’t have student loans to pay off ?

There has to be a better way. I don’t have all the answers – just a lot of questions! I wish leading people who are running these big corporations would take their eyes off their stock portfolios for a minute….stop profiteering. What good is a world overrun by greed? What good is a world where a great majority of people are living with uncertainty, disease and scarcity?

John 1:5 The light shines in the darkness,(H) and the darkness has not overcome[a] it.(I)

12 April 2021 Keeping your word

by saymber, posted in Exploring numeric value of words in English language, Home, Leading Life by Example, Money, trust, Veteran Affairs, Writing and blogging

Hello, how are you? It’s a sunny Monday afternoon. I am still waiting on the people I contacted to come and spray the weeds and grass growing in my gavel.

I think it’s important in business or in your personal life that if you make a promise about something that you keep your word.

“lie” in the English Ordinal system equals 26

“keeping your word” in the English Ordinal system equals 206

Not much to write about today but wanted to say hello!