Health – Page 37

19 October 2021 Comfort Zone

October 20, 2021 by saymber, posted in animals, Bipolar life, Health, Home, Mental Health, Writing and blogging

Hello to you. How’s your day been? My day has been long. I am happy though. Mr. Link was willing to take an afternoon stroll with me without much resistance. My knees didn’t ache either!

So today I got a call from my doctors office to reschedule my appointment. The kicker is he won’t do it via telehealth so I have to go in to the office! So that means I have to drive there.

Those of you that know me know I don’t like to drive. Driving in Middleton where I live is no big deal but once you have to venture out to Nampa and Caldwell things get stinky! So I have been forced out of my comfort zone with this. It’s good for me even if I don’t like it!

Why don’t I like to drive? Part of it is the accident I had this past Christmas and part of it is well before that. My husband used to do all the driving to my appointments and stuff. I got really used to that. When he left me last January my whole world turned upside down . I started having panic attacks when I had to drive places. Sometimes I had to be talking to a family member on the phone just to get to the grocery store. Things have gotten a lot better since I moved here but I still have a long ways to go! There is a lot of baggage wrapped up in what some think is the simple act of driving.

Part of leaving my comfort zone with driving is leaving my Link at home by himself. For some reason it’s stuck in my head “what if I don’t make it home?” I have had a problem with leaving animals home alone for as long as I’ve had pets which is most of my adult life. Cats were by far the easiest! They are so much more self sufficient. You can’t leave a dog alone for more than a day before you are going to come home to a mess! Worrying about Link does sometimes keep me from doing things.

Do you have a comfort zone? Is there a line inside of you that you don’t like to cross? For me it’s oftentimes a visceral thing. There are physical feelings involved. For example I will get hyper aware and feel like my eyes are separated from my body. I will have like an out of body feeling! What’s frustrating is I don’t feel like I have control over it. Someone will suggest something that is out of my comfort zone and that feeling will come. It didn’t used to be like this for me!

If anything here resonates I would love to hear from you !

13 October 2021 Wednesday

October 13, 2021 by saymber, posted in Art and Poetry, Food, Health, Home, In the News, Nature, Writing and blogging

Hello there, how are you ? It’s Wednesday or hump day as many people call it. Looks like it’s going to be gray and overcast today.

When the weather is like this I don’t feel like doing much of anything. All there is for me is writing and writing keeps me going. I’m so grateful for this blog and the people who stop by to visit !

“Who am I in a world of billions, living in a country in debt by the trillions. So many struggling to get ahead, Covid-19 leaving so many dead. Ships stacked with a bunch of goods, shitty sneakers to exotic foods . Water ways starting to run dry, cities scrambling to find a new supply. Who am I in this dream ? Will the human race survive or just keep losing steam ?”

I want to believe this is a world of plenty. It just seems like we don’t manage our resources very well. At some point, on a global scale, water conservation is going to have to be important. I buy water by the gallon jugs from the grocery store. Sometimes when I want to buy water they are out and that kind of scares me. What will have to change in order for us to continue to have enough water? It seems like so many products we use require water as one of its main ingredients .

Just stuff I think about!

1 October 2021 Hugs & Blogging

October 1, 2021 by saymber, posted in Art and Poetry, Bipolar life, drawing, Health, Mental Health, Writing and blogging

Hello to you ! How are you doing today ? It’s the beginning of the month already! This year has gone by so fast hasn’t it? My knees allowed me to get a couple laps in. They have been aching. Just found out there are almost 2,000 more cases of Covid here in Idaho ! I’m surprised they aren’t mandating masks again . I have family that was vaccinated and still got sick!

This morning my mind turns to hugs! I love to give and receive them. I don’t know if there is any documented evidence, but I think there must be health benefits! When I think of the mechanics of a hug it’s like putting two powerful batteries together for a few moments. It feels good. It’s like sunshine on the heart !

“Embrace me let your light shine on my heart, may the warmth last long after we are apart.”

Writing this blog has become an everyday thing I do. It helps me connect with people I wouldn’t ordinarily meet. It makes me feel useful. It helps me feel less lonely….like I have someone to talk to. Oftentimes I don’t want to finish a blog because then there will be silence! For some reason when I blog I connect with my internal “voice.”

Writing this blog gives me purpose. It’s always my hope that someone will read it and something will resonate. I think it’s a way to connect with the God of my understanding. This blog and the drawings I do each day are the highlight of my day.

“Welcome to a corner of my mind, a place to relax for a moment and unwind. A message may be just for you, a message just for me by the time the day is through. They call this exchange we are having a blog, for me it is a daily log. A daily accounting of my life, joys, tribulations and may be some strife . Thank you dear reader for stopping by, I hope you find something here for you and you’ll say hi “

27 September 2021 Early Riser

September 27, 2021September 27, 2021 by saymber, posted in Art and Poetry, Bipolar life, Health, Mental Health, Writing and blogging

Hello! How are you? I’m sitting out in the morning sun and it feels good. This morning has been a bit of mental gymnastics.

I am having trouble writing today. Thankfully there is the morning sun and it feels good against my skin. Some days I feel so out of sorts ! It seems to come out of nowhere and all I can do is ride through it . Is it this?! Is it that?! Walk around the block a couple of times. Eat an extra meal ! I’ll figure it out !!

23 September 2021 Peaceful

September 23, 2021 by saymber, posted in Art and Poetry, Bipolar life, Health, Mental Health, Spirituality and Religion, Writing and blogging

Hello to you! How are you today? I’m doing alright . I had this blog all finished a few minutes ago but I decided to discard it. I don’t know why I guess it just wasn’t what I wanted to post!

I wanted to talk about a feeling I got last night . For the first time in a long time I felt peace and contentment . I went to sleep and woke up with that feeling and it was so awesome . No emotional or physical pain! True peace . I wonder if it was spending time with my friend yesterday . We went to Red Robin for burgers and had a really nice visit. I got lots of hugs !

Oh to still the churning waters of my soul, to calm the anxiety stained winds that always seem to blow. A simple gesture of the warm embrace, to stop time and put a smile on my face. A remedy as old as can be, someone lovingly holding on to me .

I don’t know if there is a perfect formula for peace. If there was we would have a whole lot fewer doctors and pill bottles . I know part of my peace comes from God through other people . A simple thing like a hug means so much to me . I think there is a lot of power having two hearts close together .

9 September 2021 Time

September 9, 2021September 9, 2021 by saymber, posted in Art and Poetry, Bipolar life, Health, Leading Life by Example, Mental Health, Writing and blogging

Hello! How are you ? What’s going on in you where and when as you meet me here ? I hope your having a good day so far . I am having a productive morning so far. I mustered the energy to go get groceries. Whoop de doo right ?!! When your me getting groceries is a big deal !!

What’s on my mind this morning is time. Specifically time being a healer of deep emotional and spiritual wounds. It’s easy to try and heal using alcohol, drugs, shopping and any other kind of distraction but you aren’t really healing you are just procrastinating . After our dog Sam died it took me nearly 4 years to recover . With this divorce I am still healing a year later. I will say it’s getting better but there is still a ways to go….. I need more time.

I walked through time today, I didn’t stop I didn’t have anything to say. The wheels and gears spun and forced me compliant, upon its pace I was completely reliant. I had to stop and turn to face the grinding gears. The only way to relieve my pain may take years …….

8 September 2021 Clean Air

September 8, 2021September 8, 2021 by saymber, posted in Art and Poetry, Bipolar life, Health, Nature, Writing and blogging

Hello to you ! How are you ? I’m sitting here having a cup of coffee trying to clear my mind to write a little bit!

She rose from slumber clumsy and full of fog, she dreaded the pushback she was going to get from the dog. Out into the haze she put her two feet and his four paws, he dug into the pavement in protest with his claws. The sun was red like all the days before, she let him drag her back to the door. “Clean air when will you return?!! She sighed “when will the forests cease to burn ?!!”

A little bit of poetry lol . I am trying to keep my spirits up! I am hoping we will eventually get some much needed rain and the fires around us will die down. This is my second summer here in Idaho and last year was like this too !

7 September 2021 Futile Tasks

September 7, 2021 by saymber, posted in Art and Poetry, Bipolar life, Health, Writing and blogging

Hello there! How are you as you meet me here this morning ? I hope you are well . I am doing ok. I’m writing a little bit earlier than I normally do. It gives me a purpose to write so who cares what time I do it right ?!

This morning I walked by my dirty car again and I got that feeling like I should try and wash it . I also got the feeling “what’s the point of washing it? It’s just going to get dirty right away!” My car is an outside car meaning I don’t have a garage. We are surrounded by the fires that have been going on this summer so the air is always filled with ash. This ash ends up on the car everyday. It feels like washing the car is one of those futile tasks like cleaning house! The thing is if you don’t clean it once in awhile it seems like you don’t care to take care of it.

I used to have cleaning as my OCD. If I got stressed or anxious I would start cleaning because it always needed to be done ! Living with dogs changed that for me and helped me see the futility of trying to keep a house perfectly clean all the time. So now I see life as a series of futile tasks! A bunch of things we do that almost as soon as you do them you have to do it again. There has to be more to life than that !

Lately I have been struggling to muster enough energy to do these futile tasks. Where did that energy to take care of things like I used to go ? Is it me getting older? Is it me living alone? Is it me turning into a lazy person? Is it apathy or depression? When you are depressed a lot of time you just don’t want to do anything. I will have to pray on this!

30 August 2021 Being Happy

August 30, 2021 by saymber, posted in Art and Poetry, Bipolar life, Health, Mental Health, Spirituality and Religion, Writing and blogging

Hello to you. How are you doing as you visit me here today ? It’s morning as I write to you . The mornings are getting cooler and I can feel fall is on its way!

This morning my thoughts turn to the concept of being happy . What does being happy even mean ? It’s such a fleeting thing!! Even if you have everything you want and need in this life will you be truly happy?

Some people seem to come by happiness so easily! They always have a smile, easy to laugh , they are easy to please and just have an air of contentment around them. I want to be more like these people again. I used to be that kind of person and then 2020 happened !

What does being happy mean to me now ? We are already almost through 2021 and I’m still figuring it out! I am getting fleeting glimpses of what it means for me . When my ex and I used to be down we would do something I need to get back in the habit of doing – mental gratitude list . We would ask each other “what are you grateful for today ?” So many things to be grateful for ! Could gratitude be a pathway to happiness ?

What am I grateful for today ? That I have the privilege of writing this blog, my health, Link, my family and friends , thankful for a God that answers my prayers – so much more !

25 August 2021 Balance

August 25, 2021 by saymber, posted in Art and Poetry, Bipolar life, Health

Hello! How are you today ? I am under a blanket as I write to you . It’s in the 50’s this morning!

Something that has been on my mind is balance . How delicate it is. If I eat too much sugar. If I drink too much caffeine. If I don’t get enough sleep. If I get too little exercise. If I watch too much tv. All of these things and more can offset “the apple art” that is my existence . I find as I get older my body is even more sensitive and it can be frustrating!