8 Feb 2018 Morphing through Time (Enigma)

8 Feb 2018 – sketch I did this morning. He looks like a composite of all the men I have loved and or admired through my life all in one. I did a numbers thing with my name Jacqueline and Kyles today. My name’s letters added up was 106 and Kyle’s 53. I thought that was so beautiful that he would be the other part of me like that!

Morphing Thru Time


Earth. A biosphere.
A complex,
Subtly balanced life support system.

Et turtur nidum,
Ubi reponat pullos suos
Altaria tua Domine virtutum,
Rex meus, et Deus meus
(and the turtledove a nest
Where it might place its young
Your altar of strengths, Lord,
My king and my God,)

We are floating over the line
Let us follow our mind
All of our life we’ll wait for the answer
And the question is why

If we’re following our mind
We can glide into light
No one knows if there’ll be an answer
While we’re morphing through time

We are floating over the line
Let us follow our mind
All of our life we’ll wait for the answer
And the question is why

Enigma – Morphing thru time (with lyrics)

Someone I didn’t know before that I heard for the first time today:

Geraldine Farrar – Kreisler: Star of Love


Alice Geraldine Farrar[1] (February 28, 1882 – March 11, 1967) was an American soprano opera singer and film actress, noted for her beauty, acting ability, and “the intimate timbre of her voice.”[2] She had a large following among young women, who were nicknamed “Gerry-flappers”.[3][4]

8 Feb 2018 – books Kyle and I picked up at Half Price Books today.


8 Feb 2018 Refilling Energy Voids

This morning I woke up thinking about friends of mine who have had weight loss surgery. I’ve had three friends undergo this sort of procedure and the recovery process has been unique for all three of them. Now the reason I got to thinking about this was because it’s on the a train of thought I’ve been on about energy vampirism and energy consumption.

I have been frustrated with one of my friends in particular because it feels like since she had the surgery, she’s been grasping about for something to refill the energy void left behind by not being a to eat food like she used to. Well, a flag went up in myself the past couple of days. Why am I so frustrated with her? I’m looking in the mirror at a past reflection that’s why! I learned this from Shakti Gawain’s books many years ago. Usually if we don’t like someone for whatever reason, it means there is something about ourselves that we recognize in them that we don’t like. It may be we’ve moved past whatever the person is reflecting to us or we are still working through it and the person is an “ugly” reminder of what we have yet been unable to change about yourself.

What I have found myself saying in regards to the friend I’m thinking of is a quote from a movie put into a song by Velvet Acid Christ: “Did you hear it?” “It shows you things, horrible things.” “The dark inside me, from the other place… I won’t go back there, I won’t.”

The Dark Inside Me

BUT…..if others had not “fed” me when I was growing up, I see everyday in the news and through history just the sort of human being, “monster”, I could have become. As I reflect on my younger years, there were times when I was a real pain in the ass to be around. I was negative, judgmental, draining, ignorant, willful and extremely unhappy. I didn’t know how to “feed myself” (soothe myself.) Religion alone did not help me, it was specific people that were part of of my life that helped me. When I was younger I used to be fascinated with monsters real and imagined and I think part of that was my quest to try and understand what the hell was going on with me! Why was I so different?!

I realized my fascination with Dracula had an origin story in the Catholic Church ritual, Communion, “The Last Supper.” “Flesh of my Flesh, Blood of my Blood.” I can remember as a little girl truly thinking about what those words meant and I made myself break out into a sweat and nearly black out right as I knelt in a church service! If you were to take those words literally it was like cannibalism or vampirism…..consuming God! Dracula at the pulpit!  What does one do to fill the “void” the absence of a healthy relationship (to include sexual partner) provides when you are a priest?

I drew this man 11 Oct 2012 – as I drew him he morphed and at one point looked a lot like JRM which was funny as I had just found out JRM was going to portray Dracula

What I have learned from my own experience with this is when you lose something like innocence or someone significant to you like my mother committing suicide when I was barely a year old, a great energy void was created….had to be filled. I spent many years trying to put people, places, pets, “shiny things” things (which became addictions in some cases) ..anything that gave me even a fleeting glimpse of happiness into the void my mother’s death left in me. I learned the hard way that there is nothing on this earth that can fill such a void but God.

The God I understood and was taught about growing up came from churches and books. I grasped about into the New Age scene, Holistic type remedies, art, photography, work, sex, marriage, pet ownership, helping others through community service and still I didn’t truly know who God was for me. Then came that day a couple of years ago since we moved here to Texas , when my Dad and I were sitting on my back porch, and we agreed on something for the first time in a long time…..”God is in everything.”

It was kind of an “A-ha” spiritual moment for me. I have always felt like a huge part of my Dad was unknown to me because of what happened with my Mom. Here was something we both agreed on and a seed was planted in me.

30 Aug 2012 Jackie Drawing – when Dad first met Spot

When our cocker spaniel Sammy died in 2011 was another big whammy for both Kyle and I. For me, losing Sam was like losing a child and it was one of the most painful experiences I’ve had. I can remember going out to the field down the street, my “blooming field” before it became houses, and screaming in 100 degree heat at God, “BRING HIM BACK!” Just wandering everywhere looking for him, imagining he was walking with me. There was only ever going to be just one Sam and I had to find a way to live without him. I had to save myself.

Back in April 2014 I was walking in the field down the street from our house before it became houses and found half of an Choctaw Indian Christmas ornament and later found the other half at the entrance to our neighborhood! I thought it was a sign my friend Erin who is part Choctaw was having a son but we got three puppies….Link…instead. In a way it was like God answering my pleas to bring my Sammy back!

Everything is energy, everything is a sort of “food.” This is emotions, things, people, animals and nature. All of these elements consciously or subconsciously feed us energy in some way. Human beings can become “black holes” if left unchecked. A human black hole will devour anything and anyone in it’s path….negative energy vampire so to speak. Negative energy is better than not being fed and there are people, very visible people on our world stage, that model this sort of behavior for us and it may not even be a conscious effort on their part….it’s just who they are now.

We have built a society that teaches us to seek people, places and things to fill the void only God energy can fill. Well if everything is God then what to “eat?” Our diet is not just about what tangible foods we put into ourselves. Our diet is not about what celebrity’s image and spirit we can devour until we grow bored and move on. Our diet is not about the latest video game we devour until the next patch of “crack” comes out. Our diet is not supposed to be the latest electronic gadget or phone but it has become that and we are unfufilled…restless…addicted….bored and grasping about for sustainable food that just isn’t there! Do you get the idea? What are you “eating” you stay “full?”

Something else came to me from the Horror genre….the phrase that is always the worst thing to say in a horror movie, “I’ll be right back.” They never come back. After all these thousands of years of waiting for Jesus to come back he hasn’t…..or has “he?” Is God deaf to our cries? No. It’s like with our Sam. I begged God to send me Sammy back and then came Link! Three years we waited…Link was one of three boys. It was like God saying I will even let you choose! God heard me and I believe sent us Link to heal my heart but not to save me…to help me heal myself. Kyle and I had to learn to “feed ourselves” and not rely on Sammy. There is a reason dog spelled backwards is God!

Look in the mirror people. Who is there and do you love that person without condition? What are you “feeding” that person? There is nothing of this world that can fill the energy voids pain, suffering, loss and change create but God. Who is the God of your understanding? Does this God love you and all the world without condition?  Learn to “feed yourself! without “feeding” off of others or using artificial God’s. 

I know this is a lot but it’s what I was lead to write this morning. I’m not trying to change you or tell you what you should do or what you should believe and definitely not judging you. I’m just trying to help you help yourselves by sharing my experience, strength and Hope.

I hope something here resonates with you and if it does, pass it on in your way. We are all two-way or transistor radio’s in a way – sending and receiving signals.

Audioslave – Show Me How to Live

Nail in my hand
From my creator
You gave me life
Now show me how to live …
And with the early dawn
Moving right along
I couldn’t buy and eyeful of sleep
And in the aching night under satellites
I was not received
Built with stolen parts
A telephone in my heart
Someone get me a priest
To put my mind to bed
This ringing in my head
Is this a cure or is this a disease
Nail in my hand
From my creator
You gave me life
Now show me how to live
Nail in my hand
From my creator
You gave me life
Now show me how to live
And in the after birth
On the quiet earth
Let the stains remind you
You thought you made a man
You better think again
Before my role defines you
Nail in my hand
From my creator
You gave me life
Now show me how to live
Nail in my hand
From my creator
You gave me life
Now show me how to live
And in your waiting hands
I will land
And roll out of my skin
And in your final hours I will stand
Ready to begin
Nail in my hand
From my creator
You gave me life
Now show me how to live
Nail in my hand
From my creator
You gave me life
Now show me how to live
Show me how to live
Songwriters: Brad Wilk / Chris Cornell / Timothy Commerford / Tom Morello
Show Me How to Live lyrics © Sony/ATV Music Publishing LLC

Cheddar man : DNA Shows early Briton had a dark skin  — TIMES OF LION

I think he was beautiful.  What an interesting new chapter of discovery.

Feb /07/2018, TIMES OF LION A cutting-edge scientific analysis shows that a Briton from 10,000 years ago had dark brown skin and blue eyes. Researchers from London’s Natural History Museum extracted DNA from Cheddar Man, Britain’s oldest complete skeleton, which was discovered in 1903. University College London researchers then used the subsequent genome analysis for […]

via Cheddar man : DNA Shows early Briton had a dark skin  — TIMES OF LION

6 Feb 2018 13 Steps (Drawing) and Natures Voracious Appetite

6 Feb 2018 – Drawing this evening I titled, “13 Steps.”

A couple of interesting stories that came up that might be interesting to you also.  The tick story brought to mind the energy vampire stuff I shared yesterday and a memory from my childhood today.  My stepmother’s sister used to babysit me in the summer when I was real young.   I remember being sick while staying with her.  I was laying on the couch and remember finding a large bump on the top of my head.  Well I kept picking at it and it actually came off, was squishy….was alive!  I am pretty sure it was a tick and I don’t know how long it had been on my head!  Wild right?!  Then, the spider story made me think of a weird bite that showed on my foot last year and it didn’t heal for a long time – two holes like a spider bite.  I have a scar like all the times after fire ants have bitten me.  I’ve always been a buffet for insects….mostly mosquitos.  I can remember a picture of me as a little girl wearing a fur coat costume and my legs were just covered in welts from mosquito bites.  Nature has a voracious appetite from insects we cannot see to those beings we can.  Just like us, they will do anything necessary to survive. 


Science & Environment

Dracula ticks in amber tell ancient blood-sucking tale

Amber fossilsImage copyright NAture Communications/E Penalver
Image caption The tick is stuck on to a dinosaur feather

Feathered dinosaurs were covered in ticks just like modern animals, fossil evidence shows.

Parasites similar to modern ticks have been found inside pieces of amber from Myanmar dating back 99 million years.

One is entangled with a dinosaur feather, another is swollen with blood, and two were in a dinosaur nest.

Scientists say the discovery, which has echoes of Jurassic Park, is the first direct fossil evidence that ticks fed on the blood of dinosaurs.

The research is published in the journal, Nature Communications.

”Ticks parasitised feathered dinosaurs; now we have direct evidence of it,” co-researcher Dr Ricardo Pérez-de la Fuente of the Oxford University Museum of Natural History told BBC News.

”This paper represents a very good example of the kind of detailed information that can be extracted from amber fossils.”

Dracula’s tick

Amber is fossilised tree resin. The sticky substance can trap skin, scales, fur, feathers or even whole creatures, such as ticks.

In this case, the researchers found a type of tick, now extinct, that is new to science. They named it, Deinocroton draculi or “Dracula’s terrible tick”.

A modern-day tick from SpainImage copyright E Penalver
Image caption A modern-day tick from Spain

“Ticks are infamous blood-sucking, parasitic organisms, having a tremendous impact on the health of humans, livestock, pets, and even wildlife, but until now clear evidence of their role in deep time has been lacking,” said Enrique Peñalver from the Spanish Geological Survey (IGME), the lead researcher on the study.

The fossils in amber may echo the fictional world of Jurassic Park, but they will not give up the secrets of dinosaur DNA.

All attempts to extract DNA from amber specimens have failed since the complex molecule is too fragile to be preserved.

However, the fossils do give a snapshot of the lives of the feathered dinosaurs, some of which evolved into modern-day birds.

Amber fossilsImage copyright E Penalver et al
Image caption The fossils hail from Myanmar

“The fossil record tells us that feathers like the one we have studied were already present on a wide range of theropod dinosaurs, a group which included ground-running forms without flying ability, as well as bird-like dinosaurs capable of powered flight,” said Dr Pérez-de la Fuente.

“So although we can’t be sure what kind of dinosaur the tick was feeding on, the mid-Cretaceous age of the Burmese amber confirms that the feather certainly did not belong to a modern bird, as these appeared much later in theropod evolution according to current fossil and molecular evidence.”

Extraordinary find

The researchers found further evidence of ticks riling dinosaurs. Hair-like structures from skin beetles found attached to two of the ticks suggest they lived in the nests of feathered dinosaurs, along with the beetles.

“The simultaneous entrapment of two external parasites – the ticks – is extraordinary, and can be best explained if they had a nest-inhabiting ecology as some modern ticks do, living in the host’s nest or in their own nest nearby,” said Dr David Grimaldi of the American Museum of Natural History, who worked on the study.

Together, these findings suggest that ticks have been sucking the blood of dinosaurs for almost 100 million years.

After dinosaurs died out in the mass extinction 66 million years ago, ticks clung on and continued to thrive.

Ticks are closely related to spiders, scorpions and mites. They feed on animals and can pass diseases on to people, pets, wildlife and livestock.

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‘Extraordinary’ fossil sheds light on origins of spiders

ArachnidImage copyright Bo Wang
Image caption The arachnid – resembling a spider with a tail – lived about 100 million years ago

An “extraordinary” spider “cousin” trapped in amber for 100 million years is shaking up ideas about the origins of spiders.

The ancient creature had a tail, unlike its modern relatives.

It belongs to a group of arachnids (spiders, scorpions and the like) that were related to true spiders.

Researchers say it’s possible – but unlikely – that the animal might still be alive today in the rainforests of southeast Asia.

The creature’s remote habitat and small size makes it possible that tailed descendants could still be living in Myanmar, where the fossils were found, said Dr Paul Selden of the University of Kansas.

 “We haven’t found them, but some of these forests aren’t that well-studied, and it’s only a tiny creature,” he said.

Fossil treasure trove

Myanmar has yielded a treasure trove of discoveries of skin, scales, fur, feathers and even ticks preserved in fossilised tree resin.

Dracula ticks tell blood-sucking tale

This find dates back to the Cretaceous period, when dinosaurs like T. rex walked the Earth. The arachnid has an unusual mixture of ancient and modern features.

Scientists have named it Chimerarachne yingi, after the Greek mythological Chimera, a hybrid creature composed of the parts of more than one animal.

“We have known for a decade or so that spiders evolved from arachnids that had tails, more than 315 million years ago,” said Dr Russell Garwood of The University of Manchester, a co-researcher on the study.

“We’ve not found fossils before that showed this, and so finding this now was a huge (but really fantastic) surprise.”

ArachnidImage copyright Bo Wang
Image caption The tiny arachnid resembles a spider in having fangs and silk-producing spinnerets at its rear

Four specimens of the tiny spider have been found. The scientists think it lived on or around tree trunks, perhaps under bark or in the moss at the foot of a tree.

It was capable of producing silk using its spinnerets, but was unlikely to have woven webs. And it’s not known what the tail would have been used for or if the spider was venomous.

Commenting on the research, Dr Ricardo Perez-De-La Fuente, of the Oxford Museum of Natural History, said the “amazing fossils” will be important in deciphering the puzzle of the evolution of spiders and allied groups.

Chimerarachne fills the gap between Palaeozoic arachnids with tails known from rocks (uraraneids) and true spiders, and the fact the new fossils have been wonderfully preserved in Burmese amber has allowed an unmatched detail of study,” he said.

“There are many surprises still waiting to be unearthed in the fossil record. Like most unexpected findings in palaeontology it probably brings more questions than answers, but questions are what keep things exciting and push the boundaries of science.”

ArachnidImage copyright Bo Wang
Image caption The arachnid has a long tail-like appendage that we see today in scorpions

Spiders as a group date back to more than 300 million years ago. Chimerarachne shared a common ancestor with the true spiders and resembles a member of the most primitive group of modern living spiders, the mesotheles, which are found today only in China, Japan, and Southeast Asia.

“It must have lived for about 200 million years side-by-side with spiders, but we’ve never found a fossil of one of these [before] that’s younger than 295 million years,” said Dr Garwood, from Manchester’s School of Earth and Environmental Sciences.

Spiders are one of the success stories of the natural world, with more than 47,000 living species.

Over hundreds of millions of years they have evolved several unique features, including spinnerets and venom for immobilising prey.

The research is published in Nature Ecology & Evolution as two separate papers. One paper, led by Bo Wang from the Chinese Academy of Sciences, described two specimens. The other, led by Gonzalo Giribet of Harvard University, presents two more fossil arachnids.

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A Perfect Circle – Weak and Powerless

6 Feb 2018 Messy – final phase of painting #3

Hello to you.  How are you where and when you are?  It’s cold and gray here today….an inside day.  I decided to finish the painting I’ve been working on.  To some, it may look unappealing, “Messy” and “Unpolished”, like the title I gave it….my name…Jackie.  “Beauty” is definitely in the eye of the beholder!  I will be seeing my friend soon who gave me the financial support to be able to afford paints and canvas to do these.  She will be given an opportunity to choose a painting – my gratitude to her for helping me with this endeavor.  I am not sure if after the paints are gone if I will buy more.  There is a guilt I feel about this – not an eco-friendly hobby painting.  If I were to continue, Kyle and I talked about this, I would need a village lol.  Someone(s) to make canvas from scratch and Someone(s) to make paint like they used to.  There is so much that is involved for the things we use each day without even thinking about the origin of them…”where things come from” and “how they are made.”  What is the ultimate “cost” of our works, hobbies and crafts to the environment?   Are our shared activities “sustainable?”   I guess I needed a reminder.  It’s all very complicated and “Messy.” 

6 Feb 2018 – final phase of the painting and it’s messy and unpolished just like me…the title of this painting is “Jackie.”

5 Feb 2018 Drawings and Energy Vampirism

5 Feb 2018 – it’s been a very cold and gray day but I did get out and do this drawing today. “Peace with a heart”

5 Feb 2018 – Drawing I did this afternoon. Started with the figure and just evolved. This is kind of a representation of what it’s like for Empaths, Highly Sensitive People, Caretakers…”shiny people” in a world of people starving for light inside of themselves.  People who do not know how to generate their own light are attracted to those who can….it can be very draining….Energy vampirism. 


this information resonated with me from my own experience and behaviors I’ve struggled with myself.  I feel like since everything is energy, to include my concept of God, we are all vampires in a way.   If you think about it, when we eat a meal, we are basically consuming energy.  I have had the experience on more than one occasion of nearly being drained to exhaustion, sweating – nearly passing out.  I have been on the other side of it also before I learned about what exactly was going on with regards to the exchange of energy between people, places and things.  I had to learn mindfulness about energy – the rate of exchange in the interactions I have and knowing when the exchange is imbalanced and doing what I need to do to protect myself from harm.   I am still learning.  When you are a person who cares about others, too much, you can make yourself very vulnerable to this experience of energy vampirism.  I don’t know why, but thought it might be interesting to share.  I hope this information is helpful/informative to those who may not have been aware.

Energy Vampires

by Dr. Bruce Goldberg


Some people, by their very presence, seem to drain the energy of those unprotected people around them. They will often associate with a victim who exhibits the classic signs of this drain.

General debility, lack of motivation and energy, an emaciated physique, a pallid complexion, and an overall sense of weakness are typically noted. These victims also tended to be highly suggestible people. The dominant partner (energy vampire) always resists a successful treatment, or protection, applied to their victim.

Most of these energy vampires are well-meaning, normal people. They are an unhappy lot, and do their damage by a telepathic draining of their victim’s energy resources. Mere separation of two people results in immediate positive changes in the victim. In my Los Angeles office I train all such victims in the art of spiritual protection techniques to eliminate any recurrences of this syndrome. Try the psychic protection negativity experience on the hypnotic exercise link for your own protection.

I prefer to use the term “psychic parasitism” for cases where this energy drain is involuntary and subconscious. If this effect is the result of a premeditated psychic attack, I refer to the perpetrator as an energy vampire.

You will observe this process at work in any public gathering,. The more people present, the easier it will be to observe. This could be a family gathering, a lecture, or an encounter at your local movie theater. When I conduct seminars and workshops, it is more than obvious. I discuss this concept and immediately see certain heads bobbing up and down. Even more interesting is the response of their partner. These individuals give more me some of the nastiest looks I have ever seen. Fear not, I am fully protected and am not susceptible to their parasitism/vampirism.

Psychic Defense Strategies Against Energy Vampires

The psychological dynamics represented by people who inadvertently portray a psychic attacker (energy vampire) fall into five major categories. This personality type is an accumulation of that individual’s experiences in their current life, as well as in prior lifetimes.

Fear is the common denominator in these individuals, and you must learn to protect yourself from their negative influences. The five personality types are called ethereal, insecure, paranoid, passive-aggressive, and robotic.

The Paranoid Type

Betrayal is the main issue with a paranoid type. Their karmic theme in past lives has possibly been that of warrior-like behavior, self-sacrifice, and victory in their battles. As a results of their experiences, they learned that there were enemies in the world who betrayed and possibly killed them in several incarnations.

Paranoid types are soldiers still trying to win a war that no longer exists against an enemy that has long since perished. They do not trust anyone.  Everyone is their enemy and life is their battleground. Fear is everywhere and an ingrained part of their personality makeup.

Their energy fields tend to be more highly charged on the upper half of their body. They are especially fearful and distrustful of members of the opposite sex. Aggression is the most common response to the world from a paranoid type. This aggression takes the form of physical behavior and energy projections to anyone in their path.

Paranoid types constantly pick fights. They are seductive, but are incapable of long-term relationships. This person expects all others to betray them, and will assist in setting up others for this betrayal. A paranoid may initiate a betrayal as a preemptory strike.

To lose for a paranoid is to admit that they are bad. This is intolerable, so these people must win at any cost. They are hard workers, obsessive-compulsive, and are usually quite healthy physically. There is never enough time for them to accomplish their various goals.

Paranoid types insist you agree with their often-distorted view of the world. In reality, they want you to argue with them. This way they can win the argument and prove to themselves that they are good and you are bad.

Never argue with this person. Refrain from making eye contact with them. Lower and soften your voice when you speak to them, and change the topic to something pleasant.

The Ethereal Type* (this can be me sometimes)

Existential terror is the predominant issue of an ethereal type. Most often these troubled souls have been tortured to death in previous lives for their metaphysical beliefs or practices. Their only escape was to leave the body, so out-of-body experiences are the norm with them today.

These individuals do not want much contact with others. They were afraid to incarnate in their present body, and show this fear by being unwilling to commit their consciousness completely into their physical body.

Leaving their physical body often throughout the day is the most common method that ethereal types use to deal with problems. They have weak boundaries and spend as much time as possible on the spiritual realms. Since all time is simultaneous on other planes, these people find it difficult to relate to linear time.

The result of these inclinations is both withdrawal and aggression. They become aggressive and angry when forced to function on the earth plane. Their psychic attack on you is rarely premeditated, but nonetheless you must protect yourself from these individuals.

The Insecure Type

The main issue with insecure types is nurturance. These souls have been through many incarnations during which there simply was not enough food or love to go around. They usually were abandoned at some time in their present life, and fear it will happen again.

The insecure type feels that everyone around them is draining their energy; their response is to suck the energy from others to compensate. They may engage you in long, boring conversations and speak very softly. Their voice is so soft and low that you have to strain to hear them. These are compulsive people who are classically overweight and susceptible to addictions of all kinds.

These souls continually create life experience proving that they are not worthy of attention, and their energy needs and nurturing requirements will never be satisfied. To solve this deficiency, they must persist in draining the energy from others, creating a vicious cycle.

An insecure type always comes across as helpless. They insist you do things for them, and expect you to take care of their every need. Give-and-take circumstances are unknown to them. All they can do is take.

Never stand directly in front of this person. Do not make eye contact with him or her, if possible. Encourage them with words, but do not offer to do things for them. Remember these individuals live in constant fear of rejection and abandonment. Do not let your pity for them be a basis for you being their next victim.

The Passive-Aggressive Type

Invasion and being controlled is the chief concern of the passive-aggressive type. During several past incarnations, they experienced being controlled and trapped in situations, and prevented from being able to express themselves in ways they wanted to. They may have been slaves, prisoners, or been victimized by religion or governments.

These souls absolutely desire freedom, but their fear prevents them from claiming it. They are angry and resentful for not feeling free, and lack a solution to this problem. Their response to the world is withdrawal, but with a subconscious wish to obtain permission from other people to come back into the world.

Passive-aggressive types lack autonomy. They constantly strive to involve other people in their lives. This individual makes demands and resists input at the same time. They live in the now, and never plan or think about the future. Self-expression is unknown to them. It is common to observe others interfering with their development, completing their sentences, and taking them for granted.

This type of individual creates an internal world of unclear, undifferentiated fantasies and ideas, with fear at the core of this world. They imprison themselves and project loneliness, desperation, and resentment toward everyone they contact. It is impossible for them to express anger.

Whey you engage this type in a conversation, they will request your advice. Unfortunately, all of your suggestions are wrong and you are of no help to them. These people ask but reject whatever is offered to them. Their classic response to your advice is, “yes,but..”

The Robot Type

The main issue of robotic types is authenticity. They are denying their true self. During previous lifetimes, they had to keep up the appearance of being perfect in order to survive. They were most likely in charge of running things, as they probably are now.

Their outer world is perfect, the inner world is denied, and there is no core essence. They constantly fear that something is missing and life is progressing without them.

To deal with this reality, robot types try to become even more perfect. They have high-paying jobs, a good reputation, a perfect spouse and family, and look in perfect health.

The more inauthentic they act, the more meaningless the world appears. Others envy their lifestyle. People come to them with their problems. The robot types never attain satisfaction from life, and come across as a blank. They function as if on automatic pilot and are often removed from your conversation.

Robot types never complain about the world. They are perfect and everything is beautiful. Appropriateness and being “politically correct” are more important that being real.

These five types of psychic parasites need to be recognized and treated accordingly, or a psychic attack upon you is inevitable.

I highly recommend my Spiritual Growth experience CD album and my book Protected By the Light to fully benefit from this topic.




5 Feb 2018 We Are Humans First

4 Feb 2018 – notes on a chalk meditation I did about the water situation in Cape Town South Africa. I feel this is yet another “warning” for this entire world. Water is essential to all life. I read yesterday a town in Michigan is fighting with Nestle. Are they mad about not getting very much money from Nestle ($200  a year which makes me think of how oil and gas does business with small towns and royalties for mineral rights), the environmental impact or loss of water? What’s more important? Water is the most “precious” element on this planet, should it be made a commodity when no one can live without it?  What is fair?  Paying for the services it takes to get clean, safe water I think.  https://www.msn.com/en-us/news/us/tiny-michigan-town-in-water-fight-with-nestle/ar-BBIFykh?OCID=ansmsnnews11

5 Feb 2018 – We are all Human – not a color, not a creed, not a religion, not a sports team or a company logo. In the beginning there was darkness, blackness, shadow and there was light and both of them were part of life.

4 Feb 2018 – Rainbow by our back door – this with the colors of my husbands flannel were symbolic to me. There is always a fragment of Hope even when all seems lost.

4 Feb 2018 – Drawing I did after spending time out back in the late afternoon sun.

4 Feb 2018 – What I have come to understand for myself and I don’t expect anyone else to have the same understanding, is that God is everything, God is all and everything is energy. God doesn’t “feel” or “care” – that’s what we were made for.

Last night we watched the second half of the Eagles and Patriots game and really enjoyed it.  It was a clean game with few penalty flags or injuries to players.  I saw good sportsmanship between members of the opposing teams which is a good thing to show our young people.  We decided to watch it to support the players, the fans (people), and the companies with the courage to start putting their money where their “mouths” are with regards to trying to give back to the world they (all of us) rely on to exist.  Leading by example.  It’s not about pride, flags, race, religion and all the plethora of labels we’ve come up with to segregate ourselves from one another – it’s about focusing on how diversity is a strength and how we are humans first.

“We are all humans – each walk of life on this planet has done bad things to ourselves and others. I would like to see us begin to focus on our shared strengths and how our diversity is part of that strength. We are biologically incapable of perceiving the world the same for a reason. If we can focus on how we are a human beings first perhaps more will develop empathy towards their fellows.”

I think we have a world filled with people who have never know unconditional love in all the many forms in which it exists.  They go to church on Sunday and hear stories about a God of conditions for giving them love and all the conditions for being “worthy” of it.  They go to work and schools where it’s always about conditions….being good enough or risking losing everything.  They go home and their families place conditions on them for their love and devotion too.  If no one ever shows you this kind of love, if all your life is nothing but conditions, how could you know what it is.  I was and remain blessed to have those who show me what unconditional love is.    This one, Sammy, our cocker spaniel, was the my first true example – no judgement of me when I got made at him, no cares about how I looked, smelled, what I was wearing, what music I listened to, what car we had to drive or where we lived – NO CONDITIONS!  He just wanted to love and be loved.  The only conditions that existed, and he didn’t put them there, we did, was spending time together, cuddling, playing together, walks, food and water.

Me with our cocker spaniel Sammy on 25 Dec 2009. He passed away 27 April 2011.

I hope something here resonates with you and in the place I’d most like to see people use when they are making decisions – your heart. 




http://www.johnsoncountytx.org/election-day-locations – I looked at the ballot this morning for the Democratic Primaries.  I’m glad I did and would recommend my fellow Texans do the same.  I’m not sure how I feel about the word “right” anymore.  When I see it and process the word, it sounds like entitlement and that word has some negative connections to it for me.  I think we have basic things that are rights – like food, water, clothing and shelter,  and everything else I’m not so sure is a right.  I am not so sure people just want everything given to them without putting forth any effort to obtain it.  I do think there should be fair systems in place so everyone has an equal opportunity to obtain what they want beyond the basics they need for survival.  Anyhew, there are many important issues on the ballot!  Definitely need to get informed and get out and vote!

DSC_0425 4 Feb 2018 Jackie Wygant morning meditation Alvarado TX 25


And so the Diary ends ……. — Suffragette Diary – Reblog

……… with this poem Life and Death Out of the night that covers me, Black as the pit from pole to pole I thank whatever gods may be For my unconquerable soul. * In the fell clutch of circumstance I have not winced or cried aloud. Under the bludgeonings of chance My head is bloody, […]

via And so the Diary ends ……. — Suffragette Diary

My friend Sally, from the WordPress blog My Beautiful Things, found a Suffragette’s Diary in her father’s papers and has transcribed it.  I had never read this poem before.  I have found it more powerful than the coffee I’m drinking to wake up this morning! Hope you find this the same and will check out the rest of the diary – important piece of history.

https://suffragettediary.wordpress.com/ – main page

Suffragette Diary

On July 11th 2009, while sorting some of my late Father’s papers, I came across an envelope marked Suffragette’s Diary and I began to read. Serendipity indeed – the entries began on July 12th 1909, almost exactly one hundred years ago to the day I discovered it.

What follows is a transcript of the Diary, written by an unknown Suffragette, who was imprisoned in Holloway , along with a number of other window breakers  I have tried to track her down as the last post will explain. What follows is the diary, day by day as written by our Suffragette.

As my Great Grandmother, Mrs Wiseman, was a Suffragette and also imprisoned in Holloway, I have a particular interest. My Great Granny’s name can be found here in the Roll of Honour of Suffragette Prisoners 1905 – 1014

What was a Suffragette?


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Annie Kenney and Christabel Pankhurst used violent tactics in Britain as members of the Women’s Social and Political Union (WSPU)

Suffragettes were members of women’s organizations in the late-19th and early-20th centuries which advocated the extension of the “franchise“, or the right to vote in public elections, to women. It particularly refers to militants in the United Kingdom such as members of the Women’s Social and Political Union (WSPU). Suffragist is a more general term for members of the suffrage movement, particularly those advocating Women’s suffrage.

The term suffragette is particularly associated with activists in the British WSPU, led by Emmeline Pankhurst, who were influenced by Russian methods of protest such as hunger strikes. Although the Isle of Man had enfranchised women who owned property to vote in parliamentary (Tynwald) elections in 1881, New Zealand was the first self-governing country to grant all women the right to vote in 1893 when women over the age of 21 were permitted to vote in parliamentary elections.[1] Women in South Australia achieved the same right and became the first to obtain the right to stand for parliament in 1895.[2] In the United States, white women over the age of 21 were allowed to vote in the western territories of Wyoming from 1869 and in Utah from 1870. But by 1903 women in Britain had still not been enfranchised, and Pankhurst had decided the movement would have to become radical and militant if it was going to be effective. The campaign became increasingly bitter, with property damage and hunger strikes being countered by the authorities with jailing and force-feeding, until it was suspended due to the outbreak of war in 1914.

Women in Britain over the age of 30, meeting certain property qualifications, were given the right to vote in 1918, and in 1928 suffrage was extended to all women over the age of 21.[3] Opinion amongst historians today is divided as to whether the militant tactics of the suffragettes helped or hindered their cause.


British suffragettes were mostly women from upper- and middle-class backgrounds, frustrated by their social and economic situation. Their struggles for change within society, along with the work of such advocates for women’s rights as John Stuart Mill, were enough to spearhead a movement that would encompass mass groups of women fighting for suffrage. Mill introduced the idea of women’s suffrage on the platform he presented to the British electorate in 1865.[4] He was subsequently joined by numerous men and women fighting for the same cause.

The term “suffragette” was first used as a term of derision by the journalist Charles E. Hands in the London Daily Mail to describe activists in the movement for women’s suffrage, in particular members of the Women’s Social and Political Union (WSPU).[5] But the women he intended to ridicule embraced the term, saying “suffraGETtes” (hardening the g) implied not only that they wanted the vote, but that they intended to get it.[6]

The National Union of Women’s Suffrage Societies, founded in 1897, was formed from local suffrage societies. The union was led by Millicent Fawcett, who believed in constitutional campaigning, issuing leaflets, organising meetings and presenting petitions but the campaign had little effect. In 1903 Emmeline Pankhurst founded a new organisation, the Women’s Social and Political Union. She thought the movement would have to become radical and militant if it was going to be effective. The Daily Mail gave them the name “Suffragettes”.[7]

Some radical techniques used by the suffragettes, especially hunger strikes, were learned from Russian exiles from tsarism who had escaped to England.[8] Many suffragists at the time, and some historians since, have argued that the actions of the militant suffragettes damaged their cause.[9] Opponents at the time saw evidence that women were too emotional and could not think as logically as men.[10][11][12][13][14]

Early 20th century in the UK[edit]

Memorial edition of The Suffragette newspaper dedicated to Emily Davison

From 1909, the “Pank-A-Squith” board game was sold by the WSPU to raise awareness of their campaign and raise money. The name is derived from “Pankhurst”, the surname of the leaders of the WSPU, and Asquith, the surname of the Prime Minister at the time and a largely hated figure by the movement. The board game is set out in a spiral, and players must lead their suffragette figure from their home to parliament, past the obstacles faced from Prime Minister H. H. Asquith and the Liberal government. The People’s History Museum in Manchester has a “Pank-A-Squith” board game on display in the main galleries and replica version for visitors to play.[15]

7 October 1913 edition of The Suffragette

Also in 1909, suffragettes Solomon and McLellan tried an innovative method of potentially obtaining a meeting with Asquith -by sending themselves by Royal Mail courier post. However Downing street was unwilling to accept the parcel.[16]

1912 was a turning point for the British suffragettes as they turned to using more militant tactics, chaining themselves to railings, setting fire to post box contents, smashing windows and occasionally detonating bombs.[17] In 1914, at least seven churches were bombed or set on fire across the United Kingdom, including an explosion in Westminster Abbey aimed at destroying the 700-year-old Coronation Chair, which despite its proximity to the bomb, survived with only minor damage.[18]

One suffragette, Emily Davison, died under the King‘s horse Anmer at The Derby on 4 June 1913. It is debated whether she was trying to pin a “Votes for Women” banner on the King’s horse or not.[19] Many of her fellow suffragettes were imprisoned and refused food as a scare tactic against the government. The Liberal government of the day led by Asquith responded with the Cat and Mouse Act. Another prominent British suffragette, Sophia Duleep Singh, was almost forgotten for 70 years.[20]


Emmeline Pankhurst was the most prominent of Britain’s suffragettes.

In the early-20th century until the First World War, approximately one thousand suffragettes were imprisoned in Britain.[21] Most early incarcerations were for public order offences and failure to pay outstanding fines. The first suffragettes to be imprisoned were Christabel Pankhurst (daughter of Emmeline Pankhurst) and Annie Kenney in October 1905.[22] While incarcerated, suffragettes lobbied to be considered political prisoners; with such a designation, suffragettes would be placed in the First Division as opposed to the Second or Third Division of the prison system, and as political prisoners would be granted certain freedoms and liberties not allotted to other prison divisions, such as being allowed frequent visits and being allowed to write books or articles.[23] Because of a lack of consistency between the different courts, suffragettes would not necessarily be placed in the First Division and could be placed in Second or Third Division, which enjoyed fewer liberties.

This cause was taken up by the Women’s Social and Political Union (WSPU), a large organisation in Britain, that lobbied for women’s suffrage led by militant suffragette Emmeline Pankhurst.[24] The WSPU campaigned to get imprisoned suffragettes recognised as political prisoners. However, this campaign was largely unsuccessful. Citing a fear that the suffragettes becoming political prisoners would make for easy martyrdom,[25] and with thoughts from the courts and the Home Office that they were abusing the freedoms of First Division to further the agenda of the WSPU,[22] suffragettes were placed in Second Division, and in some cases the Third Division, in prisons with no special privileges granted to them as a result.[26]

Arson, property damage and domestic terrorism[edit]

Throughout the woman’s suffrage movement, many tactics were employed in order to achieve the goals of the movement. Throughout Britain, the contents of hundreds of letter boxes were set alight or corrosive acids or liquids poured over the letters and postcards inside, and thousands of shop and office windows were smashed with hammers. Telephone wires were cut, and graffiti slogans began appearing on the streets. Places that wealthy people, typically men, frequented were also burnt and destroyed, including cricket pitches, golf courses and horse racing tracks. Pinfold Manor in Surrey, which was being built for Lloyd-George, was targeted with two bombs on 19/2/13, only one of which exploded, causing significant damage. (In her memoirs, Sylvia Pankhurst claimed that Emily Davison carried out the attack.) There were 250 arson or destruction attacks in a six month period in 1913. Reports exist in the Parliamentary Papers, which includes lists of the ‘incendiary devices’, explosions, artwork destruction (including an axe attack upon a painting of The Duke of Wellington in the National Gallery), arson attacks, window-breaking, post box burning and telegraph cable breaking that occurred during the most militant years from 1910-1914.

Hunger strikes[edit]

Suffragettes were not recognised as political prisoners and many of them staged hunger strikes while they were imprisoned. The first woman to refuse food was Marion Wallace Dunlop, a militant suffragette who was sentenced to a month in Holloway for vandalism in July 1909.[27] Without consulting suffragette leaders such as Pankhurst,[28] Dunlop refused food in protest at being denied political prisoner status. After a 91-hour hunger strike, and for fear of her becoming a martyr,[28] the Home Secretary Herbert Gladstone decided to release her early on medical grounds.[22] Dunlop’s strategy was adopted by other suffragettes who were incarcerated.[29] It became common practice for suffragettes to refuse food in protest for not being designated as political prisoners, and as a result they would be released after a few days and could return to the “fighting line”.[30]

After a public backlash regarding the prison status of suffragettes, the rules of the divisions were amended. In March 1910, Rule 243A was introduced by the Home Secretary Winston Churchill, allowing prisoners in Second and Third Divisions to be allowed certain privileges of the First Division, provided they were not convicted of a serious offence, effectively ending hunger strikes for two years.[31] Hunger strikes began again when Pankhurst was transferred from the Second Division to the First Division, inciting the other suffragettes to demonstrate regarding their prison status.[32]

Militant suffragette demonstrations subsequently became more aggressive,[22] and the British Government took action. Unwilling to release all the suffragettes refusing food in prison,[29] in the autumn of 1909, the authorities began to adopt more drastic measures to manage the hunger-strikers.


Poster by “A Patriot”, showing a suffragette prisoner being force-fed, 1910.

In September 1909, the Home Office became unwilling to release hunger-striking suffragettes before their sentence was served.[30] Suffragettes became a liability because if they were to die in custody, the prison would be responsible for their death. Prisons began the practice of force-feeding the hunger strikers through a tube, most commonly via a nostril or stomach tube or a stomach pump.[29] Force-feeding had previously been practised in Britain but its use had been exclusively for patients in hospitals who were too unwell to eat or swallow food. Despite the practice being deemed safe by medical practitioners for sick patients, it posed health issues for the healthy suffragettes.[28]

Memories of Winson Green September 18, 1909; Illustration from Mabel Cappers WSPU prisoners scrapbook

The process of tube-feeding was strenuous without the consent of the hunger strikers, who were typically strapped down and force-fed via stomach or nostril tube, often with a considerable amount of force.[33] The process was painful and after the practice was observed and studied by several physicians, it was deemed to cause both short-term damage to the circulatory system, digestive system and nervous system and long-term damage to the physical and mental health of the suffragettes.[34] Some suffragettes who were force-fed developed pleurisy or pneumonia as a result of a misplaced tube.[35]


In April 1913, Reginald McKenna of the Home Office passed the Prisoners (Temporary Discharge for Ill Health) Act 1913, or the Cat and Mouse Act as it was commonly known. The act made the hunger strikes legal, in that a suffragette would be temporarily released from prison when their health began to diminish, only to be readmitted when she regained her health to finish her sentence.[33] The act enabled the British Government to be absolved of any blame resulting from death or harm due to the self-starvation of the striker and ensured that the suffragettes would be too ill and too weak to participate in demonstrative activities while not in custody.[29] Most women continued hunger striking when they were readmitted to prison following their leave.[36] After the Act was introduced, force-feeding on a large scale was stopped and only women convicted of more serious crimes and considered likely to repeat their offences if released were force-fed.[37]

The Bodyguard[edit]

In early 1913 and in response to the “Cat and Mouse Act”, the WSPU instituted a society of women known as the “Bodyguard” whose role was to physically protect Emmeline Pankhurst and other prominent suffragettes from arrest and assault. Known members included Katherine Willoughby Marshall and Gertrude Harding; Edith Margaret Garrud was their jujutsu trainer. Members of the “Bodyguard” participated in several violent actions against the police in defence of their leaders.[38]

The origin of the “Bodyguard” can be traced to a WSPU meeting at which Garrud spoke. As suffragettes speaking in public increasingly found themselves the target of violence and attempted assaults, teaching jujitsu was a way for women to defend themselves against angry hecklers.[39] Incidents including Black Friday, at which 200 suffragettes were assaulted by police, served to illustrate the need for militant women to be able to defend themselves against male violence.

World War[edit]

At the commencement of the First World War, the suffragette movement in Britain moved away from suffrage activities and focused their efforts on the war effort, and as a result, hunger strikes largely stopped.[40] In August 1914, the British Government released all prisoners who had been incarcerated for suffrage activities on an amnesty,[41] with Pankhurst ending all militant suffrage activities soon after.[42] The suffragettes’ focus on war work turned public opinion in favour of their eventual partial enfranchisement in 1918.[43]

Women eagerly volunteered to take on many traditional male roles – leading to a new view of what women were capable of. The war also caused a split in the British suffragette movement; the mainstream, represented by Emmeline and Christabel Pankhurst’s WSPU calling a ceasefire in their campaign for the duration of the war, while more radical suffragettes, represented by Sylvia Pankhurst‘s Women’s Suffrage Federation continued the struggle.

The National Union of Women’s Suffrage Societies, which had always employed “constitutional” methods, continued to lobby during the war years and compromises were worked out between the NUWSS and the coalition government.[44] On 6 February, the Representation of the People Act 1918 was passed, enfranchising women over the age of 30 who met minimum property qualifications as well as men over 21 – before this not all British men were enfranchised.[45] About 8.4 million women gained the vote.[45] In November 1918, the Parliament (Qualification of Women) Act 1918 was passed, allowing women to be elected into parliament.[45] The Representation of the People Act 1928 extended the voting franchise to all women over the age of 21, granting women the vote on the same terms that men had gained ten years earlier.[46]


Nineteen-year-old Fay Hubbard selling suffragette papers in New York, 1910

Historians generally argue that the first stage of the militant suffragette movement under the Pankhursts in 1906 had a dramatic mobilizing effect on the suffrage movement. Women were thrilled and supportive of an actual revolt in the streets; the membership of the militant WSPU and the older NUWSS overlapped and were mutually supportive. However a system of publicity, Ensor argues, had to continue to escalate to maintain its high visibility in the media. The hunger strikes and force-feeding did that. However, the Pankhursts refused any advice and escalated their tactics. They turned to systematic disruption of Liberal Party meetings as well as physical violence in terms of damaging public buildings and arson. Searle says the methods of the suffragettes did succeed in damaging the Liberal party but failed to advance the cause of women’s suffrage. When the Pankhursts decided to stop the militancy at the start of the war, and enthusiastically support the war effort, the movement split and their leadership’s role ended. Suffrage did come four years later, but the feminist movement in Britain permanently abandoned the militant tactics that had made the suffragettes famous.[47][48]

Whitfield concludes that the militant campaign had some positive effects in terms of attracting enormous publicity, and forcing the moderates to better organize themselves, while also stimulating the organization of the antis. He concludes:

The overall effect of the suffragette militancy, however, was to set back the cause of women’s suffrage. For women to gain the right to vote it was necessary to demonstrate that they had public opinion on their side, to build and consolidate a parliamentary majority in favor of women’s suffrage and to persuade or pressure the government to introduce its own franchise reform. None of these objectives was achieved.[49]


Gold ear rings in suffragette colours

Pendant presented to Louise Eates in 1909

From 1908, the WSPU adopted the colour scheme of violet, white and green: violet symbolised dignity, white purity, and green hope. These three colours were used for banners, flags, rosettes and badges, They also would carry heart shaped vesta cases, and appeared in newspaper cartoons and postcards.[50]

Mappin & Webb, the London jewellers, issued a catalogue of suffragette jewellery for Christmas 1908.

In 1909 the WSPU presented specially commissioned pieces of jewellery to leading suffragettes Emmeline Pankhurst and Louise Eates. Some Arts and Crafts jewellery of the period incorporated the colours violet, white and green using enamel and semi-precious stones such as amethysts, pearls, and peridots. However jewellery that incorporated these stones was already quite common in women’s jewellery during the late 19th century, before 1903 and could not be connected with the suffragettes, before the WSPU adopted the colours. Also, the notion that the colours were green, white, and violet, to spell GWV as an acronym for “Give Women Votes” is a modern fallacy.[51]

The colours of green and heliotrope (purple) were commissioned into a new coat of arms for Edge Hill University in 2006, symbolising the University’s early commitment to the equality of women through its beginnings as a women-only college.[52]

Popular culture[edit]

Notable people[edit]

Great Britain[edit]



See also[edit]


  1. Jump up ^ Ida Husted Harper. History of Woman Suffrage, volume 6 (National American Woman Suffrage Association, 1922) p. 752.
  2. Jump up ^ “Foundingdocs.gov.au”. Foundingdocs.gov.au. Archived from the original on 3 December 2010. Retrieved 8 January 2011. 
  3. Jump up ^ Crawford 1999.
  4. Jump up ^ van Wingerden 1999, p. 9.
  5. Jump up ^ Crawford 1999, p. 452.
  6. Jump up ^ Colmore, Gertrude. Suffragette Sally. Broadview Press, 2007, p. 14
  7. Jump up ^ Ben Walsh. GCSE Modern World History second edition (Hodder Murray, 2008) p. 60.
  8. Jump up ^ Grant 2011.
  9. Jump up ^ Howell, Georgina (2010). Gertrude Bell: Queen of the Desert, Shaper of Nations. p. 71. 
  10. Jump up ^ Harrison 2013, p. 176.
  11. Jump up ^ Pedersen 2004, p. 124.
  12. Jump up ^ Bolt 1993, p. 191.
  13. Jump up ^ “Did the Suffragettes Help?”. Claire. John D. (2002/2010), Greenfield History Site. Retrieved 5 January 2012. 
  14. Jump up ^ “The Suffragettes: Deeds not words” (PDF). National Archives. Retrieved 5 January 2012. 
  15. Jump up ^ Collection Highlights, Pank-A-Squith Board Game, People’s History Museum 
  16. Jump up ^ Time Stokes (21 December 2017). “The strangest things sent in the post”. BBC news. Retrieved 21 December 2017. 
  17. Jump up ^ “SUFFRAGETTES”. The Register. Adelaide: National Library of Australia. 16 April 1913. p. 7. Retrieved 26 October 2011. 
  18. Jump up ^ “Bomb explosion in Westminster Abbey; Coronation Chair damaged; Suffragette outrage”. The Daily Telegraph. 12 June 1914. p. 11. 
  19. Jump up ^ Thorpe, Vanessa (26 May 2013). “Truth behind the death of suffragette Emily Davison is finally revealed”. The Guardian. Guardian News and Media Limited. 
  20. Jump up ^ “With ‘Sophia,’ A Forgotten Suffragette Is Back In The Headlines”. NPR.org. Retrieved 2 January 2016. 
  21. Jump up ^ Purvis 1995, p. 103.
  22. ^ Jump up to: a b c d Geddes 2008, p. 81.
  23. Jump up ^ Purvis, June (March–April 1995). “Deeds, not words: The daily lives of militant suffragettes in Edwardian Britain”. Women’s Studies International Forum. ScienceDirect. 18 (2): 97. doi:10.1016/0277-5395(95)80046-R. 
  24. Jump up ^ Purvis 1995, p. 104.
  25. Jump up ^ Williams 2001, p. 285.
  26. Jump up ^ Williams, Elizabeth (December 2008). “Gags, funnels and tubes: forced feeding of the insane and of suffragettes”. Endeavour. PubMed. 32 (4): 134. doi:10.1016/j.endeavour.2008.09.001. PMID 19019439. 
  27. Jump up ^ Purvis, “”Deeds, Not Words””, 97
  28. ^ Jump up to: a b c Miller 2009, p. 360.
  29. ^ Jump up to: a b c d Miller 2009, p. 361.
  30. ^ Jump up to: a b Geddes 2008, p. 82.
  31. Jump up ^ Geddes 2008, pp. 84–5.
  32. Jump up ^ Geddes 2008, p. 85.
  33. ^ Jump up to: a b Purvis, “Deeds, Not Words”, 97.
  34. Jump up ^ Williams, “Gags, funnels and tubes”, 138.
  35. Jump up ^ Geddes 2008, p. 83.
  36. Jump up ^ Geddes 2008, p. 88.
  37. Jump up ^ Geddes 2008, p. 89.
  38. Jump up ^ Wilson, Gretchen With All Her Might: The Life of Gertrude Harding, Militant Suffragette (Holmes & Meier Publishing, April 1998)
  39. Jump up ^ Ruz, Camila; Magazine, Justin Parkinson BBC News. “‘Suffrajitsu’: How the suffragettes fought back using martial arts”. BBC News. Retrieved 2015-12-09. 
  40. Jump up ^ Williams, “Gags, funnels and tubes”, 139.
  41. Jump up ^ Geddes 2008, p. 92.
  42. Jump up ^ Purvis 1995, p. 123.
  43. Jump up ^ J. Graham Jones, “Lloyd George and the Suffragettes”, National Library of Wales Journal (2003) 33#1 pp. 1–34
  44. Jump up ^ Ian Cawood, David McKinnon-Bell (2001). “The First World War”. p.71. Routledge 2001
  45. ^ Jump up to: a b c Fawcett, Millicent Garrett. The Women’s Victory – and After. p.170. Cambridge University Press
  46. Jump up ^ Peter N. Stearns (2008).In 1979 the first British women prime minister Margaret came> The Oxford encyclopedia of the modern world, Volume 7. p.160. Oxford University Press, 2008
  47. Jump up ^ , Robert Ensor, England: 1870–1914 (1936) pp 398–99
  48. Jump up ^ G.R. Searley, A New England? Peace and War 1886–1918 (2004) pp 456–70. quote p 468
  49. Jump up ^ Bob Whitfield, The Extension of the Franchise, 1832–1931 (2001) p 160
  50. Jump up ^ Crawford 1999, pp. 136–7.
  51. Jump up ^ Hughes, Ivor (March 2009). “Suffragette Jewelry, Or Is It?”. Antiques Journal. Archived from the original on 11 January 2012. Retrieved 5 January 2012. 
  52. Jump up ^ “Colours, Crest & Mace”. Retrieved 5 October 2014. 
  53. Jump up ^ McPherson, Angela; McPherson, Susan (2011). Mosley’s Old Suffragette – A Biography of Norah Elam. ISBN 978-1-4466-9967-6. Archived from the original on 13 January 2012. 
Bolt, Christine (1993). The Women’s Movements in the United States and Britain from the 1790s to the 1920s. Amherst, MA: University of Massachusetts Press. ISBN 978-0-870-23866-6. 
Crawford, Elizabeth (1999). The Women’s Suffrage Movement: A Reference Guide, 1866–1928. London: UCL Press. ISBN 978-1-841-42031-8. 
Geddes, J. F. (2008). “Culpable Complicity: the medical profession and the forcible feeding of suffragettes, 1909–1914”. Women’s History Review. 17 (1): 79–94. doi:10.1080/09612020701627977.  closed access publication – behind paywall
Grant, Kevin (2011). “British suffragettes and the Russian method of hunger strike”. Comparative Studies in Society and History. 53 (1): 113–143. doi:10.1017/S0010417510000642.  closed access publication – behind paywall
Harrison, Brian (2013) [1978]. Separate Spheres: The Opposition to Women’s Suffrage in Britain. Abingdon: Routledge. ISBN 978-0-415-62336-0. 
Miller, Ian (2009). “Necessary Torture? Vivisection, Suffragette Force-Feeding, and Responses to Scientific Medicine in Britain c. 1870–1920”. Journal of the History of Medicine and Allied Sciences. 64 (3): 333–372. doi:10.1093/jhmas/jrp008.  closed access publication – behind paywall
Pedersen, Susan (2004). Eleanor Rathbone and the Politics of Conscience. New Haven, CT: Yale University Press. ISBN 978-0-300-10245-1. 
Purvis, June (1995). “The Prison Experiences of the Suffragettes in Edwardian Britain”. Women’s History Review. 4 (1): 103–133. doi:10.1080/09612029500200073.  open access publication – free to read
Williams, John (2001). “Hunger Strikes: A Prisoner’s Right or a ‘Wicked Folly’?”. Howard Journal. 40 (3): 285–296. doi:10.1111/1468-2311.00208.  closed access publication – behind paywall

Further reading[edit]

Atkinson, Diane (1992). The Purple, White and Green: Suffragettes in London, 1906–14. London: Museum of London. ISBN 978-0-904-81853-6. 
Hannam, June (2005). “International Dimensions of Women’s Suffrage: ‘at the crossroads of several interlocking identities'”. Women’s History Review. 14 (3–4): 543–560. doi:10.1080/09612020500200438.  closed access publication – behind paywall
Leneman, Leah (1995). A Guid Cause: The Women’s Suffrage Movement in Scotland (2nd ed.). Edinburgh: Mercat Press. ISBN 978-1-873-64448-5. 
Liddington, Jill; Norris, Jill (2000). One Hand Tied Behind Us: The Rise of the Women’s Suffrage Movement (2nd ed.). London: Rivers Oram Press. ISBN 978-1-854-89110-5. 
Mayhall, Laura E. Nym (2000). “Reclaiming the Political: Women and the Social History of Suffrage in Great Britain, France, and the United States”. Journal of Women’s History. 12 (1): 172–181. doi:10.1353/jowh.2000.0023.  closed access publication – behind paywall
——— (2003). The Militant Suffrage Movement: Citizenship and Resistance in Britain, 1860–1930. New York, NY: Oxford University Press. ISBN 978-0-195-15993-6. 
Purvis, June (2002). Emmeline Pankhurst: A Biography. London: Routledge. ISBN 978-0-415-23978-3. 
Purvis, June; Sandra, Stanley Holton, eds. (2000). Votes For Women. London: Routledge. ISBN 978-0-415-21458-2. 
Rosen, Andrew (2013) [1974]. Rise Up Women!: The Militant Campaign of the Women’s Social and Political Union, 1903–1914 (Reprint ed.). Abingdon: Routledge. ISBN 978-0-415-62384-1. 
Smith, Harold L. (2010). The British Women’s Suffrage Campaign, 1866–1928 (Revised 2nd ed.). Abingdon: Routledge. ISBN 978-1-408-22823-4. 
Wingerden, Sophia A. van (1999). The Women’s Suffrage Movement in Britain, 1866–1928. Basingstoke: Palgrave Macmillan. ISBN 978-0-333-66911-2. 

Primary sources[edit]

  • Estelle Sylvia Pankhurst. The suffragette; the history of the women’s militant suffrage movement, 1905–1910 (New York Sturgis & Walton Company, 1911).

External links[edit]

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3 Feb 2018 “Zapored”

2 Feb 2018 – Added a couple more elements to my painting last night. A message before I fell asleep last night was to “stay in the light and love.”

Hello to you. How are you doing? I’m waking up with some coffee that I am grateful for. I am grateful to the workers and the earth that makes coffee a reality.  I am wearing my gold ruby heart necklace from my parents this morning and am grateful to those who make “gold happen.”  I was worried about the people in this story out of South Africa.  No one should have to die for vanity items, computers, trinkets, coins and bars:


UPDATE 2-Workers trapped underground in South Africa gold mine rescued

JOHANNESBURG, Feb 2 (Reuters) – All the miners who were trapped underground for more than 24 hours after a storm knocked out powerlines supplying electricity to the Beatrix gold mine in South Africa have been rescued, operator Sibanye-Stillwater said on Friday.

In a painstaking rescue mission, the exhausted miners were hoisted up one by one after temporary power pylons were installed. None sustained major injuries.

Although the company had said the more than 1,000 mineworkers stuck underground were never in danger, the incident highlights safety concerns in an industry that is home to the world’s deepest mines, with workers at some sites operating at depths of up to 4 km.

“Everyone is fine, there were minor injuries and a bit of dehydration but that’s all,” company spokesman James Wellsted said.

Some workers were rescued on Thursday after emergency power supply from backup generators, but damage to the winder control systems and generators at one of the Beatrix shafts caused by a power surge forced 955 employees to remain underground.

They were hoisted to surface on Friday after temporary power line pylons were installed by Sibanye-Stillwater and Eskom, the country’s power utility.

The effort to get the mineworkers to the surface was slow, as they were coming up one at a time, union officials said.

“We can also confirm that all workers did not sustain any injuries … they are just exhausted,” spokesperson Livhuwani Mammburu, the National Union of Mineworkers (NUM) said.

“The NUM is extremely worried about health and safety measures in all mining companies in South Africa.”

The parliamentary committee on mineral resources asked the Department of Mineral Resources (DMR) to explain why its safety inspectors failed to detect that the Beatrix mine did not have a reliable backup power system.

Officials at the DMR were not available to comment.

By November, the 2017 death toll of 76 in South Africas mines had already surpassed the 2016 figure of 73, ending nine straight years of falling fatalities and raising red flags for the industry.

The trend reversal is likely to reignite investor concern over mine safety and could prompt regulators to step up shaft inspections, which often result in costly production stoppages. (Reporting by Tanisha Heiberg; Writing by James Macharia; Editing by Alison Williams)


How much gold is there in the world?

  • 1 April 2013
Austrian gold

Imagine if you were a super-villain who had taken control of all the world’s gold, and had decided to melt it down to make a cube. How long would the sides be? Hundreds of metres, thousands even?

Actually, it’s unlikely to be anything like that size.

Warren Buffett, one of the world’s richest investors, says the total amount of gold in the world – the gold above ground, that is – could fit into a cube with sides of just 20m (67ft).

But is that all there is? And if so, how do we know?

A figure that is widely used by investors comes from Thomson Reuters GFMS, which produces an annual gold survey.

 Their latest figure for all the gold in the world is 171,300 tonnes – which is almost exactly the same as the amount in our super-villain’s imaginary cube.

A cube made of 171,300 tonnes would be about 20.7m (68ft) on each side. Or to put it another way, it would reach to 9.8m above ground level if exactly covering Wimbledon Centre Court.

But not everyone agrees with the GFMS figures.

Estimates range from 155,244 tonnes, marginally less than the GFMS figure, to about 16 times that amount – 2.5 million tonnes.

That bigger figure would make a cube of sides 50m (166ft) long, or a column of gold towering 143m above Wimbledon centre court.

Gold piled up on Wimbledon's centre court

So why are the figures so different?

Part of the reason is that gold has been mined for a very long time – more than 6,000 years, according to gold historian Timothy Green.

The first gold coins were minted in about 550 BC under King Croesus of Lydia – a province in modern-day Turkey – and quickly became accepted payment for merchants and mercenary soldiers around the Mediterranean.

Up until 1492, the year Columbus sailed to America, GFMS estimates that 12,780 tonnes had been extracted.

But one investor who looked at the research done in this area, James Turk, the founder of Gold Money, discovered what he regarded as a series of over-estimates.

He believes that the primitive mining techniques used up to the Middle Ages mean that this figure is much too high, and that a more realistic total is just 297 tonnes.

His figure for the overall amount of gold in the world is 155,244 tonnes – 16,056 tonnes, or 10% less, than the assessment by Thompson Reuters GFMS. A relatively small disparity, perhaps, but one that at today’s prices comes to more than $950bn.

His conclusions are accepted by some investors but such is the feeling between rival analysts that one competitor described Turk’s figures as an alternative to the GFMS’s “in the same way that Jedi is an alternative to Christianity”.

But there are others who think both sets of figures are too low.

One of Tutenkhamen's sarcophagi

“In Tutankhamen’s tomb alone they found that his coffin was made from 1.5 tonnes of gold, so imagine the gold that was found in the other tombs that were ransacked before records were taken of them,” says Jan Skoyles of gold investment firm The Real Asset Company.

While James Turk makes only minor adjustments to the GFMS figure for the amount of gold mined after 1492, Skoyles points out that even today China is “not particularly open” about how much gold it is mining.

And in some countries, such as Colombia, “there’s a lot of illegal mining going on”, she says.

She doesn’t have an exact figure to offer, but one organisation that has tried to do some maths is the Gold Standard Institute.

Gold mine in Bunia
Image caption There is much gold still in the ground, like here in Democratic Republic of Congo

Its experts believe that if we emptied our bank vaults and jewellery boxes, we’d find no less than 2.5 million tonnes of gold – though they admit that the evidence is somewhat sparse and the figure is a bit speculative.

So who’s right?

Well, we don’t know.

In the end, all these numbers are made up of estimates added to estimates added to yet more estimates. Maybe they’re all way off.

The good news is that we are not likely to run out of gold any time soon. The US Geological Survey estimates there are 52,000 tonnes of minable gold still in the ground and more is likely to be discovered.

The bad news is that the way we use gold is starting to change.

Queen Elizabeth surveying gold in the Bank of England

Up to now it has never gone away. It has always been recycled.

“All the gold that has been mined throughout history is still in existence in the above-ground stock. That means that if you have a gold watch, some of the gold in that watch could have been mined by the Romans 2,000 years ago,” says James Turk.

The way gold is being used in the technology industry, however, is different.

The British Geological Survey states that about 12% of current world gold production finds its way to this sector, where it is often used in such small quantities, in each individual product, that it may no longer be economical to recycle it.

In short, gold may be being “consumed” for the first time.

So I had some interesting dreams. I woke up this morning thinking I had forgotten and then I was reminded. There were four dream segments.

The first segment was about being in two places at once. I know that doesn’t make sense but I was in the dream but I was aware I wasn’t there. I can remember singing in the dream in a foreign language. I was walking with a man near water in the dark and we were in Germany. I can remember my singing in the dream but trying to hear myself singing in “this world”. It’s like when you scream in a dream but it comes out silent in the “waking world.” It was like that only singing instead (I’ve done the screaming in a dream part..scary!) One word I remember from the song was “Zapore.”

The next segment was of being in a bath house like in Baden, Baden Germany. I actually visited Baden, Baden when I was stationed in Germany. There was a young woman and and old man and me. We were all naked. The attitude was we were all just sharing a bath, nothing sexual. (The Europeans are very different about nudity and shame than Americans. It was refreshing to experience a healthier attitude about the body while I was there.)


Then there was a segment about choosing between two men. There was the angry man in the pickup who I was in relationship with, or Darren Criss (Blaine from Glee – guess my dream factory decided to cast him). I can remember giving Darren my phone number and we were going to get together.

The last part was about walking through a tunnel of dark trees with low hanging branches like Willow trees branches. The trees had eyes and so did the shadows.

All of these dreams needed keys from my conscious world – memories and experiences to unlock them. Not sure why my dream factory came up with these particular dreams.  I don’t question the dreams,  I just try to remember and record them.

The dream about walking with a man around the water makes me think of King Ludvig II:

Source Internet – King Ludwig II of Bavaria…the Swan King

8 Oct 2017 – Man I drew yesterday. I was thinking of King Ludwig when I was drawing it.



On 13 June at 6pm, Ludwig II asked to go for a walk around the lake. He set off along with one of the psychiatrists who had declared him insane, Dr Bernard Van Gudden. The men never returned, and were eventually found dead. Ludwig’s death was officially declared to be suicide by drowning, yet there are inconsistencies in the story. The autopsy said that there was no water in Ludwig’s lungs making drowning as a cause of death seem unlikely. There was also evidence that Dr Van Gudden had been strangled and hit on the head. Notes found on the death bed of a local fisherman who died in 1933 claimed that Ludwig had been shot. The fisherman, Jacob Lidl said he had witnessed this while hiding behind a bush waiting to help Ludwig II escape, and that he had been forced to sign a statement swearing he would never tell this to anyone

2 Feb 2018 – Last drawing I did yesterday thinking about our shared family tree. The circles remind me of those Trivial Pursuit Game Pieces. (I just looked up Trivial Pursuit the game and http://elkodaily.com/lifestyles/announcements/obituaries/blaine-sullivan-rose/article_a34bc765-2065-5ec2-add5-20c4027d52b1.html came up – Blaine Sullivan Rose. She was apparently her families Trivial Pursuit Champion! My prayers for Rose and for her family.)

2 Feb 2018 Treasure

https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Matthew+6&version=NIV – this chapter of the Bible came to my mind thinking about the title of my blog today.   I use the term God because it’s a term most people universally know.  Every walk of life on this planet has their own version of what “God” is.  In my opinion it is the term “religion” versus spirituality that has divided us as a species.  For so long people thinking they are right and others are wrong instead of just accepting that everyone is different.  So much bloodshed over who is right and who is wrong in regards to religion!  It’s important to remember in addition to us not all being born into the same “systems” we are biologically incapable of perceiving existence the same way (thank you Josh White: https://bookme.name/JoshWhite)!

The God of my understanding is the Energy of all existence.  There is no gender or anything specific – just Energy.   There isn’t just one way when it comes to such a God and that is why I chose this understanding for myself.  I want to live in a world where people are allowed to be who they were born to be and lead fulfilling lives – knowing unconditional love as they live, not waiting for death to obtain it in a place they’ve been taught they won’t be worthy to receive it anyways!  Why would a loving God condemn their creation to such a negative spiral of existence?!  Never understood that.

I do not fly under any one “banner” of religion/spirituality but do find a lot of wisdom in the New Testament.  Matthew is one of my favorite books.

Matthew 6 New International Version (NIV)

Giving to the Needy

“Be careful not to practice your righteousness in front of others to be seen by them. If you do, you will have no reward from your Father in heaven.

“So when you give to the needy, do not announce it with trumpets, as the hypocrites do in the synagogues and on the streets, to be honored by others. Truly I tell you, they have received their reward in full. But when you give to the needy, do not let your left hand know what your right hand is doing, so that your giving may be in secret. Then your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you.


(I’ve gone even simpler and found much better results.  When you place too many conditions on God and they go unmet, you sow a seed of resentment in your heart against God if your prayer with conditions isn’t answered like you think it should be.  The God of my understanding, the Energy of all life/existence, does not feel or have emotions like we do….that’s what we are for.  That’s why we have hearts and senses….bodies.  God can see all through existence forward and backwards…we cannot.  We do not know “what is best” for any given situation with our limited tangible experience.   Our souls may be ancient but God will always be older!   The prayer I came up with for myself:   “I pray for the greatest and most loving good for (insert person, place, situation).  Not as I would have it, but as you would have it.”)

“And when you pray, do not be like the hypocrites, for they love to pray standing in the synagogues and on the street corners to be seen by others. Truly I tell you, they have received their reward in full. But when you pray, go into your room, close the door and pray to your Father, who is unseen. Then your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you. And when you pray, do not keep on babbling like pagans, for they think they will be heard because of their many words. Do not be like them, for your Father knows what you need before you ask him.

“This, then, is how you should pray:

“‘Our Father in heaven,
hallowed be your name,
10 your kingdom come,
your will be done,
    on earth as it is in heaven.
11 Give us today our daily bread.
12 And forgive us our debts,
    as we also have forgiven our debtors.
13 And lead us not into temptation,[a]
    but deliver us from the evil one.[b]

14 For if you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. 15 But if you do not forgive others their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins.


16 “When you fast, do not look somber as the hypocrites do, for they disfigure their faces to show others they are fasting. Truly I tell you, they have received their reward in full. 17 But when you fast, put oil on your head and wash your face, 18 so that it will not be obvious to others that you are fasting, but only to your Father, who is unseen; and your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you.

Treasures in Heaven* 

(Where is “heaven” to you? Why must we wait for death to experience it when God has made heaven all around us to share with those we love while we still live?)

19 “Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moths and vermin destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. 20 But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moths and vermin do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal. 21 For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.

22 “The eye is the lamp of the body. If your eyes are healthy,[c] your whole body will be full of light. 23 But if your eyes are unhealthy,[d] your whole body will be full of darkness. If then the light within you is darkness, how great is that darkness!

24 “No one can serve two masters. Either you will hate the one and love the other, or you will be devoted to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve both God and money.

Do Not Worry

25 “Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes? 26 Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? 27 Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life[e]?

28 “And why do you worry about clothes? See how the flowers of the field grow. They do not labor or spin. 29 Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. 30 If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you—you of little faith? 31 So do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ 32 For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. 33 But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. 34 Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.


  1. Matthew 6:13 The Greek for temptation can also mean testing.
  2. Matthew 6:13 Or from evil; some late manuscripts one, / for yours is the kingdom and the power and the glory forever. Amen.
  3. Matthew 6:22 The Greek for healthy here implies generous.
  4. Matthew 6:23 The Greek for unhealthy here implies stingy.
  5. Matthew 6:27 Or single cubit to your height

New International Version (NIV)Holy Bible, New International Version®, NIV® Copyright ©1973, 1978, 1984, 2011 by Biblica, Inc.® Used by permission. All rights reserved worldwide.

I know some people are “put off” by the Bible and “religion-speak” but sometimes, if we have an open-mind, we can see how all things are useful, connected even.  I believe each moment we live is filled with “clues” to the next moment….no snoozing allowed in Life School!


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This blog is to encourage others that is being victimize, been a victm, or were a victim that they no longer have to live in hidden. I want to share words of encouragement to them and let them know they can come out of their situtaion alive no matter what there abuser is telling or has told them over the years. Some individuals have left their abuser but they are still living in afraid or living in in jail mental; the victim have to get his or her life back. Living behind the wall in public isn't well for them. They have to make a stand for themselves and regain what they lost in that relationship. It will not happen within a week or probably a month. First of all its a learning process, admit to what they lost, and let go of the shame, pride, and bitter. Its up to the victim to want to be a Survior not the abuser.


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