Category: Bipolar life

23 Oct 2025 Sleepy vs Tired

by saymber, posted in Bipolar life, Health, Mental Health, Politics and Government, Spirituality and Religion, Veteran Affairs, Writing and blogging

Hello to you. It is evening as I write to you. My thoughts are winding down and soon it will be time for bed. I’m trying to do what my therapist and I talked about on Tuesday. I told her about my troubles falling asleep and her suggestion was that I go to bed when I’m sleepy not just tired. Her advice really resonated with me. I had never really thought of going to sleep that way. When you’re sleepy you will feel it whereas when you are tired it’s more of a cerebral thing. For example I start going to bed at 9 pm and won’t fall asleep til 1-2 am! I usually have to have a nighttime meditation from YouTube on. The one I listen to the most is from the Relax For Awhile Channel with Joanne: https://youtu.be/204EcI6-9Vo?si=_NM2VlXI8PvdFgWZ

I wanted to mention that I am deeply disappointed about what is being done to the east wing of the White House. He’s acting like it’s his own house and can just do whatever he wants to it without permission. It’s our house! Very sad!

John 1:5New International Version

5 The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness has not overcome[a] it.

15 Oct 2025 Walk

by saymber, posted in Bipolar life, Mental Health, Nature, photography, Spirituality and Religion, Writing and blogging

Hello there! How are you today? I’m just back from a nice walk. My head condition (I get a tightness in my ears that affects my balance) bothered me but I kept on walking. It’s currently a crisp 60 degrees- perfect walking temperature. I was going to get groceries today but decided I’ll go tomorrow after prayer. I have started a list on my phone. It’s going to be expensive as I will picking up toilet paper and Links new food! Even for just me it’s almost $200 and that’s not even a full cart!

One of my favorite color combos in roses
Cheerful yellow roses
Some uplifting orange flowers

Isaiah 43:1New International Version

Israel’s Only Savior

43 But now, this is what the Lord says—
    he who created you, Jacob,
    he who formed you, Israel:
“Do not fear, for I have redeemed you;
    I have summoned you by name; you are mine.

14 Oct 2025 Restful Sleep

by saymber, posted in Bipolar life, dreams, Health, Mental Health, Spirituality and Religion, technology, Veteran Affairs, Writing and blogging

Hello to you. How is your week so far? Good I hope and if it’s not I am praying for you. I am hoping you have a good support system surrounding you to help you get through whatever you’re facing. There have been several natural disasters – namely flooding in Alaska, Mexico and Arizona and places I haven’t seen reports on. Climate change is wreaking havoc everywhere it seems. I’m glad I live in Idaho as we rarely have extreme weather.

As I write to you this evening, my thoughts are turning to the upcoming battle I am going to have tonight with the darkness – sleep. I can feel tired and turn out the lights and it’s like an invitation for my mind to start racing. It’s not as bad as it was when I was working but it still happens. I have tried different things like trying not to be on my phone so much before bed but I like to have something to listen to which means still interacting with my phone. There is a creator on YouTube named Jason Stephenson I like to listen to but sometimes after his 3 hour meditation an loud ad at the end will wake me up! The same sometimes happens when I listen to Abide audios that have scripture and spiritual messages.

Not getting good sleep causes me to get into an unhealthy pattern. I will want to sleep during the day to make up for not sleeping through the night. It’s very rare that I have dream filled and restful sleep when I’m in such a pattern. I toss and turn a lot trying to get comfortable and poor Link stirs every time I do! Something I will do sometimes is I will ask Jesus for his help in getting to sleep and that helps sometimes. Another thing that I learned long ago when I was doing yoga is to talk to each part of my body. I tell each part to relax and I usually fall asleep before I get through my whole body.

Dear Jesus I pray for all those in the world who need your help in their lives. Whether it be natural disasters or tragic loss of loved ones for whatever reason – please use your body of believers to reach them. Let the lost souls of this world see your power through your body of believers. Jesus will not be mocked!

Galatians 6:7New International Version

7 Do not be deceived: God cannot be mocked. A man reaps what he sows.

7 Oct 2025 The Answer

by saymber, posted in Bipolar life, Health, history, Leading Life by Example, Mental Health, Social media, Spirituality and Religion, Writing and blogging

Hello to you. I’m just back from a beautiful walk. The weather is just perfect! It felt good to walk off the lunch I had with Ruth and John at Burger King after Bible study. They are getting a new roof put on today. When I left them it looked like it was nearly done! Looked good!

Well my prayers were answered regarding yesterdays quandry about whether or not I should share my story here online. The answer from my family and Bible study was a resounding no. It’s just not safe or in my best interest to share so much personal information about myself online. I have already shared bits and pieces in previous blogs if people are curious about my journey. I think what happened when I got baptized was I had some layers of me stripped away. It really was a profound experience that is going to be with me for the rest of my life! It’s like being reborn in a way.

What’s interesting to note is how quickly Jesus answered my question of what to do. I have only been praying and my family has been praying about it for a couple of days. He used the people that love and care for me to give me my answer quickly. I truly believe from experience that believers are the bodies God uses to do his will. I also think the quick answer was to protect me and also give my Aunt Ruth peace of mind. She was really worried about me.

If it is only going to be like a journal it’s not handwritten- it’s on my phone using the notes application. My Aunt and I were trying to figure out if I should print it out or not. She thinks it should only be family that reads it. She is worried other people that aren’t family might treat me differently if they read it. I will continue to talk to Jesus about it as long as it’s on my mind.

Psalm 91:11New International Version

11 For he will command his angels concerning you to guard you in all your ways;

Baptism- Symbol of New Life (Romans 6:3-4): Paul explains that being baptized into Christ means being united with him in his death and resurrection, so that, “just as Christ was raised from the dead by the glory of the Father, we too might walk in newness of life”. 

6 Oct 2025 Safety in Sharing

by saymber, posted in Bipolar life, history, Leading Life by Example, Mental Health, Spirituality and Religion, Veteran Affairs, Writing and blogging

Hello to you. I’m just back from a cool walk around the block. It’s really starting to feel and look like fall. Yesterday my Aunt and Uncle had me over for some cozy beef stew and a new episode of one of our favorite Britbox shows Sister Boniface. It was kind of sad as it seems like the show may be ending by how the episode ended.

The topic today is because I have finally, after many years, started putting to words my experiences as a Bipolar person. Specifically what has happened to me through manic episodes. I had started on it a year ago and picked it back up yesterday. It was like my brain just was dumping all kinds of memories. I could probably write a book there is so much! Anyhew I was talking about this thing I’m doing with my dear friend Tawna and she was wondering what I was going to do with it. I said I wanted to share it in my blog and she expressed concern. She suggested that may be I should get an impartial party to read it first – for safety’s sake. I just don’t know who. She suggested somebody like my Pastor Jason but he’s already got so much on his plate! What I need is an editor to read it and get it streamlined. I will continue to pray about it. I will say putting together all these things really stirred me up. Once I got started everything came back. I keep thinking that what I’ve been through wasn’t for no reason. I’ve been through so much these 57 years. It’s been about 23 years of those 57 of being Bipolar. Maybe sharing my story will help someone? How much is too much to share on social media? Your feedback is welcomed.

Matthew 24:27-31 (NIV):

“For the Son of Man will come with the glory of his Father in the company of his angels, and then he will reward everyone according to what they have done… “Then will appear the sign of the Son of Man in heaven. And then all the peoples of the earth will mourn when they see the Son of Man coming on the clouds of heaven, with power and great glory”. 

    28 Sept 2025 Baptism

    by saymber, posted in Bipolar life, Leading Life by Example, Mental Health, Spirituality and Religion, Veteran Affairs
    I was so nervous doing this but God lead me through it!

    Hello to you! I’m home from breakfast at the Sunrise Cafe with family celebrating a big milestone in my walk to Jesus – baptism! I was so nervous taking this step but God surrounded me with his people to help me through it. When I sat down in the trough the water was very cold. I was shaking as Diana read my testimony and a part of me did not want to do what I was about to do. I felt the enemy trying to tug at me and question my decision but Pastor Jason, Diana and Jim helped me stay seated and be in the moment.

    My testimony:

    I love Jesus and taking this step today is so special to me. I was raised Roman Catholic and have always believed in God but have never truly surrendered to Jesus. Since getting here to Idaho 5 years ago I have been surrounded with evidence of Jesus’s love for me. My family and both the Nampa and Middleton Grace church’s have shown me the way! God is good!

    My Idaho family
    My dear friend Jeannie

    27 Sept 2025 Red Tree

    by saymber, posted in Bipolar life, Home, Nature, photography, Spirituality and Religion, Writing and blogging
    Fall signs are here!

    Hello to you! It’s another beautiful fall day. The tree across the street has turned a beautiful flaming red. I wanted to share it with you. Tomorrow I get baptized and I’m both looking forward to it and nervous at the same time! I’m making a big statement about my faith doing this. Thankfully some of my family will be there. The day also is special because my cousin Heidi will be turning 60! She is such a beautiful lady inside and out. She doesn’t look her age at all.

    Daniel 4:11-12New International Version

    11 The tree grew large and strong and its top touched the sky; it was visible to the ends of the earth. 12 Its leaves were beautiful, its fruit abundant, and on it was food for all. Under it the wild animals found shelter, and the birds lived in its branches;from it every creature was fed.

    21 Sept 2025 Strength in Weakness

    by saymber, posted in Bipolar life, history, Leading Life by Example, Mental Health, Spirituality and Religion, Writing and blogging

    Hello to you. I’m just home from church – today marks our 9th year anniversary as a church. The church has grown so much from even when I started coming. I sat with my friend Jeannie and her brother-in-law Roy who was having trouble getting around today. Pastor Keith Waggoner from the Nampa campus we came from gave a great sermon. Today’s message really resonated with me:

    2 Corinthians 12:7-10New International Version

    7 or because of these surpassingly great revelations.Therefore, in order to keep me from becoming conceited, I was given a thorn in my flesh, a messenger of Satan, to torment me. 8 Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me. 9 But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. 10 That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.

    I have been praying for God to heal me from what ails me for several years now and he has not moved. I believe that what is happening to me is similar to what Paul was talking about. If I was in perfect health I might not turn to God like I do. I might become conceited. God has walked with me through a lot – being bipolar, balance issues and chronic back pain. When I was in AA many years ago, he delivered me from alcoholism, chronic skin picking, smoking and bulemia. I have been through a lot in this life and God has been there every step of the way. Just because he hasn’t healed me completely doesn’t mean he’s absent. He has a plan!

    Next Sunday I am being baptized. They have asked me to give a testimonial so I will work on that this week! God is moving in my life!

    20 Sept 2025 Fall Is Coming

    by saymber, posted in Animal Rights, animals, Bipolar life, history, Home, human rights, In the News, Leading Life by Example, Mental Health, Politics and Government, Spirituality and Religion, Veteran Affairs, Writing and blogging

    Hello there. How are you? I’m just back from my evening walk – just one time around the big block today. My back continues to be a nuisance so I have to be careful. I have been feeling something in the air lately – fall is coming. There is an anticipation in the trees and the rest of nature. I love how cozy fall can make life seem. The warmer clothes come out. Hot cocoa with marshmallows gets made. A fire gets lit in the fireplace. Candles get lit. The days get shorter. All of these and more rituals of fall are coming. Do you like fall? The only thing I don’t like is having to take up leaves!

    It’s easier to think about changing seasons than it is about what is happening to our world right now. I pray for our country and this world every day. I pray for our leadership at all levels as they are being challenged so greatly. I pray for our fire fighters, police and first responders. The world is a very dangerous place for them. I pray for the men, women and children trying to survive in war torn regions of this world. I pray for the poor, sick and homeless. I pray for all neglected and abused animals. Jesus we lift up this broken world to you – there are some things we cannot fix without your divine intervention. Have mercy on us – please hear our prayers!

    Oh and I wanted to mention there have been a couple recent blips on the radar with regards to UAPs:

    https://www.nbcnews.com/news/amp-video/mmvo247250501553

    12 Sept 2025 Turning To God

    by saymber, posted in Animal Rights, animals, Bipolar life, history, Home, human rights, In the News, Leading Life by Example, Mental Health, Politics and Government, Spirituality and Religion, Veteran Affairs

    Hello to you. As I write to you tonight, I have a heavy heart. With the recent murders of Charlie Kirk and Iryna Zarutska and so many others that don’t make the headlines, it’s just a really sad time for America. It feels like every day we are being fed negative news. We can’t catch our collective breath! What I’m having to do is turn to God and pray for our country…for this world. I want to use my words here to lift up the spirits of those who intentionally or unintentionally visit my blog.

    I would ask you reader what are you grateful for today? I am grateful for the savior who unconditionally loves me. When everything is dark there is light in Jesus and giving thanks. What we focus on the most gains the most power. I want to focus my personal power on the good in this world even though that is so hard to do right now.

    My prayer for today:

    Dear Jesus the people of this world need to know you now more than ever. I pray that those who are casting about and are lost will be lead to your loving and merciful light. I pray for the truth of what you taught us how to love one another, your creations and you would take center stage. I pray especially for the children that are the innocent in the affairs of adults. They should be able to go to churches and schools free from fear. I also pray for all animals that you would intercede for those being needlessly abused and neglected. Thank you holy father!

    Mark 10:13-16New International Version

    The Little Children and Jesus

    13 People were bringing little children to Jesus for him to place his hands on them, but the disciples rebuked them. 14 When Jesus saw this, he was indignant. He said to them, “Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of God belongs to such as these. 15 Truly I tell you, anyone who will not receive the kingdom of God like a little child will never enter it.” 16 And he took the children in his arms,placed his hands on them and blessed them.