4 Aug 2025 Joy

August 5, 2025 by saymber, posted in Bipolar life, Health, Home, Mental Health, photography, Spirituality and Religion, Veteran Affairs, Writing and blogging

Describe one habit that brings you joy.

Hello to you. I hope this finds you well. Today’s prompt isn’t easy for me to answer. It should be after all Joy is literally my middle name! There isn’t one habit that springs to mind that brings me genuine joy. Ever since the divorce and changing from Lithium to Depakote feeling genuine emotion has been hard for me. Sometimes it feels like I am an actress playing a part of a human being. Prior to what happened to me about three years ago, I was a very emotional person. Tears and belly laughs came to me easily and that’s just not the case anymore. I have become a very serious person in my old age. I miss the silly and youthful woman I used to be!

The things that use to bring me joy and fulfillment aren’t a part of my life now. I use to crochet, make wire jewelry, experiment in my kitchen, draw, write poems and short stories, take lots of pictures, spend time with nature, sing and dance. The only things I still do is this blog and from time to time is take nature pictures! I guess I just haven’t found a way to completely fill the void getting divorced left in me. Loving Jesus is gradually healing me but it’s taking time! He is the great physician and I know in his time he will restore me to my best self again.

Picture from a walk with my cousin Laura a couple years ago

James 4:8-10New International Version

⁸Come near to God and he will come near to you.Wash your hands, you sinners, and purify your hearts,you double-minded. ⁹Grieve, mourn and wail. Change your laughter to mourning and your joy to gloom.¹⁰Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will lift you up.

3 Aug 2025 Thank You and Babby Farms

August 3, 2025 by saymber, posted in Animal Rights, animals, Bipolar life, Leading Life by Example, Mental Health, Spirituality and Religion

Hello to you! Hope this finds you well. Today has been a really good day. It began with church and a message that gave us the opportunity to thank those who God has worked through to get us where we are in our walk of faith:

2 Corinthians 3:3New International Version

³You show that you are a letter from Christ, the result of our ministry, written not with ink but with the Spirit of the living God, not on tablets of stone but on tablets of human hearts.

As we left the service we were able to take a notecard to write a thank you note. What was nice about this is after church I was going to spend some time with one of my earth angels and friend who along with her husband, my cousin, have been instrumental in my walk with Jesus. I wrote a loving note to her and my cousin and got to see the impact it made! I gave her something she can refer back to in trying times.

We went to the Sunrise for breakfast and it was good as always. Then we drove out to Babby Farms in Caldwell. The admission wasn’t bad we got a military discount. It was quite hot out in the open so we enjoyed the shady spots for a breezy sit down. They had horses and various livestock some you could hand feed and some not. The ones you could feed were really eager to eat out of your hands! They had two camels with double humps that we watched for awhile. We walked the enclosure that had kangaroos and Tawna wanted so much to touch them but we didn’t. The place had a whole inside exhibit with marmosets, parrots, bats and fish and much more. Just when you thought you had seen everything there was more! There was a gray horse Tawna fell in love with – she gave them extra loves!

The gray horse that Tawna fell in love with

It was so nice to get to spend time with my dear friend and see some place new. The drive out to where Babbys is located was very rural and nice. You didn’t see all the land up for sale and I hope it stays that way! Nice to see lots of fields of farmland.

31 July 2025 Appearance

August 1, 2025 by saymber, posted in Food, Home, Spirituality and Religion, Veteran Affairs, Writing and blogging

How would you describe yourself to someone who can’t see you?

Hello to you. Hope this finds you well. Today began with prayer with Pastor Jason and Pastor Jim. Always lots to pray for. We prayed for our church and its people. I read the prayer from yesterday’s blog. I talked to Pastor Jason about getting baptized. It’s been tugging at my heart for quite some time! So we are going to do it the last Sunday in September. My family knows so they can be there for it. After prayer I finally got groceries – $200 for just me! The cart was filled with mostly stuff to drink. I am glad I got it over with! I went for a walk after I put everything away and it was kind of a struggle but I made myself do the half mile loop.

Today’s prompt makes me think of Little House On The Prairie. Laura wrote her books in a very descriptive way so that her blind sister Mary could see what she was talking about. I would describe myself as sort of tall and curvy. Short hair with hazel eyes and olive skin (I tan easily). My head is smaller than my body – heart shaped face. I have long arms and long legs. I have a very short waist. Can you see me?

Isaiah 53:2New International Version

²He grew up before him like a tender shoot,
and like a root out of dry ground.
He had no beauty or majesty to attract us to him,
nothing in his appearance that we should desire him.

30 July 2025 Changing World

July 31, 2025 by saymber, posted in Animal Rights, animals, Bipolar life, Food, Home, human rights, Mental Health, Spirituality and Religion, Veteran Affairs

Hello to you. It’s Wednesday evening as I write to you. It was hot again so I am glad I got a walk in early. My lower back and hips have been bothering me again so I am going to sit out the second walk this evening. My mind is kind of scattered right now. I’ve been following the headlines and there is so much going on – especially praying for all those in the path of the tsunamis! Living here in Idaho we are pretty blessed in the weather department. We seldom have extremes certainly no tsunami’s!

I’ve been putting off going to the grocery store as long as I can. My fridge is empty except for some yogurts and potatoes- couple frozen meals in the freezer. I don’t love grocery shopping. I looked into having them delivered from Walmart but changed my mind. If I were to start that it would be one more thing to keep me isolated and stay out of shape. Getting groceries, even though I hate it, keeps me engaged with the town I live in. So tomorrow, after meeting for prayer, I will force myself to go get groceries.

Lately I have been a little lonely and bored but things will change as I get into August. I have some medical appts and this next Sunday, after church, I’m looking forward to seeing Tawna and having breakfast and going to Babby Farms animal sanctuary. It’s kind of sad that I have lived here in Middleton going on 5 years and I still don’t really know my neighbors all that well. All the friends I have made are at church! Thank God for that! At least it’s not like it was in Texas – 12 years and just one friend! It’s harder to make friends when we grow up.

A prayer to close:

Dear Jesus I pray for all the lives both human and animal affected by the earthquake and subsequent tsunamis. I pray for all of those affected in our world by violence and war. Especially the children who are not getting their basic needs met each day. Please help the animals in the food systems throughout the world. Let there be mercy and compassion. Help consumers demand more humane treatment of all animals who die each day that humans might live Please help the sick, the poor, the hungry and the homeless of our world. Through those of us that are blessed, may we be your bodies to do your good works in this world. Amen.

John 15:5-8New International Version

⁵“I am the vine; you are the branches. If you remain in me and I in you, you will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing. ⁶If you do not remain in me, you are like a branch that is thrown away and withers; such branches are picked up, thrown into the fire and burned. ⁷If you remain in me and my words remain in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be done for you. ⁸This is to my Father’s glory, that you bear much fruit, showing yourselves to be my disciples.

27 July 2025 Free Plane Tickets

July 27, 2025 by saymber, posted in Health, Leading Life by Example, Spirituality and Religion, Veteran Affairs

If you won two free plane tickets, where would you go?

Hello to you. It’s Sunday again – the week just flew by! Today was a bit of a struggle to get going – lower back and hip pain. I made some coffee and prayed for relief and it came along with some Biofreeze topical pain medication. All the walking I’ve been doing caught up with me I guess! If I won two plane tickets I would go to Ireland – always wanted to go there.

At church we were in Corinthians again – 2 Corinthians 1:5-11. What Pastor Jason stressed in this was just because we are believers it doesn’t mean everything is easy – sometimes things get really tough. Our hope must remain in Jesus at all times good and bad. It’s easy to believe when times are good. I liken us to being a blade under a blacksmiths hammer- being shaped and molded by the hammer and fire to perfection. Sometimes it takes a long time to make a good sword. For me personally I have been through a lot of tough stuff and ultimately it has been my faith in God that has pulled me through. God has me on his anvil- molding and shaping me:

2 Corinthians 1:5-11New International Version

⁵For just as we share abundantly in the sufferings of Christ, so also our comfort abounds through Christ.⁶If we are distressed, it is for your comfort and salvation; if we are comforted, it is for your comfort, which produces in you patient endurance of the same sufferings we suffer. ⁷And our hope for you is firm, because we know that just as you share in our sufferings, so also you share in our comfort.

⁸We do not want you to be uninformed, brothers and sisters,^[a] about the troubles we experienced in the province of Asia. We were under great pressure, far beyond our ability to endure, so that we despaired of life itself. ⁹Indeed, we felt we had received the sentence of death. But this happened that we might not rely on ourselves but on God, who raises the dead. ¹⁰He has delivered us from such a deadly peril,and he will deliver us again. On him we have set our hope that he will continue to deliver us, ¹¹as you help us by your prayers. Then many will give thanks on our behalf for the gracious favor granted us in answer to the prayers of many.

I liked this that Pastor Jason quoted:

Job 13:15New International Version

¹⁵Though he slay me, yet will I hope in him;
I will surely^[a] defend my ways to his face.

Today was also baptism Sunday and I almost went up when he asked if anybody else wanted to be baptized! My family wants to be present when I do it but I think they would forgive me if I just spontaneously did it! It’s definitely on my heart.

23 July 2025 Known

July 23, 2025 by saymber, posted in Spirituality and Religion

Hello to you. Hope you are well. A lot has been going on! Hard to believe Ozzy Osborne has died.

Last night I went to see Jason Squires on his Known tour. There was a pretty good turnout for a weekday. He sang some of his original songs that went along with uplifting stories to include his own testimony of him and his family surviving what could have been a fatal car crash. I was happy because my friend Charlotte Ward sat with me and gives the best hugs! Amy Potter, Cheryl Hargan and their families where there too. They are all busy people but they made time to go to this event. I am glad I went because I really needed to have some time in worship besides just going to Sunday service.

https://youtu.be/7-XmvCSkRQ0?si=_SKo2sJwrpEFuqdh – Not Finished Yet – Jason Squires (song he wrote after near fatal car accident)

22 July 2025 Spirit

July 22, 2025 by saymber, posted in dreams, Spirituality and Religion

Hello to you. I hope your week is going well. Last night I dreamt a lot and I can only remember one of the dreams. It was about being with a young boy who reminded me of my ex husbands youngest brother named Cole. He had lost his father and his father wanted to comfort his son and decided to use me to do it. He came into my body which in past dreams used to scare me awake – but not this time. I reached out to the boy and hugged him and gave the fathers spirit peace. I could hear the sound I have heard before in what I call channeling dreams. I don’t know why I dreamt about that but it was interesting! It’s been awhile since I’ve had a dream about spirits.

John 14:16-17New International Version

¹⁶And I will ask the Father, and he will give you another advocate to help you and be with you forever— ¹⁷the Spirit of truth. The world cannot accept him,because it neither sees him nor knows him. But you know him, for he lives with you and will be^[a] in you.

Read

20 July 2025 Answers in Affliction

July 20, 2025 by saymber, posted in Health, Leading Life by Example, Mental Health, Spirituality and Religion

Hello to you. It’s a bright and cool Sunday as I write to you – only 78 degrees! I am back from church – good messages I needed to hear today. We were in 2 Corinthians 1. What spoke to me was this part:

2 Corinthians 1:3-4New International Version

Praise to the God of All Comfort

³Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, ⁴who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves receive from God.

For going on 4 years I have been experiencing a pooling in my ears and balance issues as a result. I haven’t been officially diagnosed but I believe I have Mal De Debarquement Syndrome. It just won’t go away. I have had a brain scan and have seen an ear doctor and neither of them found anything. I am convinced this was triggered after being tased by police during a manic episode I had about 3 years ago. I had pooling in my ears but not the weeble wobbly sensation in my head. They say some kinds of trauma can trigger it. Every day I pray for healing but God has remained silent for a cure. I pray “let me be your miracle” and nothing has changed. Lots of people pray for me and still God has not moved. At least I am able to walk! I just have to pay close attention and I need to keep trying to lose more weight.

I comfort myself with passages like we read today. For some reason I am staying like this. May be so I can comfort others who have this affliction? For some reason God is not answering the prayers the way I am hoping. May be he has something else in mind!

For more info I got this from: https://my.clevelandclinic.org/health/diseases/24796-mal-de-debarquement-syndrome-mdds

Mal de Débarquement Syndrome (MdDS)

Mal de débarquement syndrome (MdDS) is a rare vestibular disorder that makes you feel like you’re moving even when you’re not. MdDS is common after traveling, especially by boat. In most cases, MdDS symptoms go away within 24 hours. But they can linger for months or even years, in some instances.

18 July 2025 Gowen Field Visit

July 18, 2025July 18, 2025 by saymber, posted in Bipolar life, Spirituality and Religion, Veteran Affairs

Hello to you. Hope this finds you well and staying cool. As I write to you it’s a bright and sunny 94 degrees here in Idaho.

Today started out a little bit earlier than normal. One of my earth angels, my cousin Tony, came and picked me up so we could go to Gowen Field, which is near Boise, so I could update all my files to reflect that I’m divorced. We were blessed that their retiree affairs officer, Bill Fackler, was there to help me with my Survivor Benefit Program (SBP) and finance files to get them to reflect that I’m divorced. Unfortunately you have to update your SBP file within a year of being divorced to stop paying into it and it was 2021 that the divorce was final. At least we were able to get things updated. Bill was fantastic! He has been fishing a couple times with Tony so they got a chance to get caught up while we were there. I went the ID card office and was able to update my DEERs. DEERs is what is used for tracking dependents. It felt really good to get so much done in one place! The folks working there are really friendly and good at what they do. This trip was an answer to my prayers as I had been fretting about getting all this done for quite some time.

On the way back to my house, we stopped at the Sunrise Cafe for breakfast which included a much needed by my cousin, good cup of coffee. Emma, the manager was there – she remembers me when I go there! Another gal, Ria (spelling?)said hello as she remembered me too. There is a reason I love going to that place! It was nice having good company for a delicious breakfast. I had French toast and Tony got a huge pancake he could hardly finish. After breakfast we took a walk together which was nice too. He couldn’t stay long as he had a massage therapist appointment to get to. His back gives him trouble too. It was so nice to have time with Tony. He works a lot and doesn’t get much free time.

Link was happy I was home – he got a couple pieces of bacon which he devoured. I always save a piece or two for him. I kinda feel guilty eating bacon to be honest. I think it’s because there is so much cruelty with the raising and slaughtering of pigs! May be some day there will be a good substitute for the different kinds of meat we eat!

Dear Jesus I give you praise for this day. Thank you for how smoothly things went at Gowen Field. Thank you for Bill Fackler. I thank you for my family, especially my cousin Tony. I pray for Eli who is Tony and Tawna’s little 15 year old dog who is having back and other problems. I pray for all world leaders at all levels of government to have wisdom. I pray for all the animals in captivity that they know kindness and compassion. I pray for the homeless, the sick, the hungry and the poor that they receive relief and mercy. Lastly I pray for the lost who don’t know you or just don’t believe in you Jesus – show them the way. Amen!

16 July 2025 The Now

July 17, 2025 by saymber, posted in animals, Bipolar life, Home, In the News, Mental Health, Spirituality and Religion, Veteran Affairs

Hello to you. It’s another sunny and hot day here as I write to you. I hope this finds you well. If not I hope somehow God will show you how loved you are.

My thoughts this afternoon are about keeping my thoughts in the now. What sparked this was thinking about Link getting older. He’s showing signs of his age already- he will be 11 this December 9th. I can remember all too well how many pieces my heart was shattered at losing 4 pets in close succession when I lived in Texas. Two dogs and two cats – my fur babies Sam, Blondie, Amber and May. I think it was losing them that contributed to my many manic episodes that lead to my frequent hospitalizations. I never had children so they filled that maternal void in me. Losing them was so painful I could barely stand it!

Link is my second son and I try to avoid thinking of how losing him will break my heart again! I am trying to keep my thoughts in the now about him. Cherish each day the good Lord gives us together. I have said I don’t know if I will have another dog or cat after Link. As I stand here now, I don’t know if my heart will be able to take it! I say this now but who knows what God will have for me. Taking in Link helped heal my broken heart!

Dear Jesus I come before you to pray for this world and all its inhabitants. I pray for all the animals and those who are pet owners who may be on the verge of having to say that most painful of goodbyes. I pray for the flood victims and their families in Texas. I pray for the children of war torn regions of this world. I pray for the families struggling to make ends meet in this American economy. I pray for the world’s sick, poor and hungry. We need you now more than ever. I pray all this in your precious name. Amen.