21 April 2023 Random Encounter

Describe a random encounter with a stranger that stuck out positively to you.

Hello to you. How are you? I’m feeling a bit strange – tired. I woke up a couple times in the night – not a restful sleep. Then I got a text at like 4:30 in the morning from a person I reconnected with lol. So I’m writing from bed. Link has his annual exam at the vet today so I have to get up and at em eventually!

Todays prompt brought to mind a great part of my journey. I was having troubles while being on active duty in Florida. For some reason I was at the finance office on base and ran into a man, I can’t remember his name, but he was really beautiful. He was a black man with crystal blue eyes. I think I have mentioned before I have a thing with blue eyes. Anyways we started talking. He was a broker I think, He asked me if I had a church home and I said no, He invited me to the mega church he was attending in addition to a lunch his company was having for clients.

What’s funny about meeting this man is back when I was in Colorado I had gone to Manitou Springs a few years before being stationed in Florida, I had a rune reading done that prophesied I would meet a man that would change my entire life. Meeting this man felt like s fulfillment of that prophesy.

I went to the mega church with this man and his family and the message was about how the Holy Spirit is an actual person you can have a relationship with. Not just a ghost or something like that. Well this all happened when I was struggling with my mental and physical health. Especially having problems with abusing alcohol and I was taking mental health meds – not a good combination.

It was a Sunday after the message about the Holy Spirit that I was sitting in my sun porch in the base housing we lived in and I was in my swimming suite and drunk. I remembered the message from the church service and just said “I surrender.” The very next day the Holy Spirit started moving me along. The following Monday I was getting my bike out to ride to work and the chain just fell off! I had to put it back on – hands a mess of oil. I was running late then. Then, on the way, I was nearly hit by a turning car had I been a few seconds earlier. I got to work and found out I had an annual physical appointment so I had to leave again. At the appointment there was questions pertaining to alcohol use and I was moved by the Spirit to answer honestly. From there began being sent to treatment in Maryland, introduction to AA (Alcoholics anonymous) and ultimately my being medically retired, divorced and falling in love.

All this after a chance meeting with a perfect stranger! I feel bad I can’t remember his name – meeting him was definitely divine timing.

The reading I had in manitou springs
The Holy Spirit uses many different ways to communicate and guide us on our journey. This reading is not Christian but planted a seed in me. Meeting the seer who gave me this reading was able to tell me someone was going to come along and help me get where I needed to go with God.

20 April 2023 MRI Results

Hello to you. Hope this finds you well. Yesterday my Auntie and I went and had my MRI. I’m so grateful she was able to go with me! They called me today about the results and the doctor had no further concerns. I have a follow up in June to discuss the results. I think my suspicion of my having Mal de barque syndrome is correct. We have checked the ears and the brain and nothing has shown up. So whatever is going on will either eventually go away or I will just have to live with it indefinitely. I will stay in gratitude that nothing bad has come up with all the tests.

This morning at 9:30 am was another prayer team session at Grace House. There were a couple of us to include Pastor Jason. We had about two pages of prayer praises and prayer requests. Some things didn’t make it to the printed list but passed our lips and hearts. There is a lot going on in our little church and the crazy world it’s trying to operate in!

My dear Link helps me each day

Romans 12:5New International Version

5 so in Christ we, though many, form one body,and each member belongs to all the others.

Proverbs 19:21New International Version

21 Many are the plans in a person’s heart,
but it is the Lord’s purpose that prevails.

15 April 2023 Happiness

What are 5 everyday things that bring you happiness?

Hello to you. How are you? I hope your doing ok. The world is kind of crazy! Todays prompt is a good one. When the world around you is seeming kind of chaotic a good way to get grounded is to focus thoughts on what’s good in your life – gratitude. Something I’ve done ever since I was in rehab many years ago was a mental gratitude list. Rather than sit and complain pull out your gratitude list. What’s fun about doing it is how quickly you go from just one thing your grateful for to a whole bunch of things.

I have many things that make me happy and that I’m grateful for. At the top of my list is family and friends. My family and friends have gotten me to this day! True examples of unconditional love. Next is of course Link. I love waking up to his sweet smile and wagging tail. Number three is good food – I enjoy food too much lol! Number four is my connection to God – having a church home has really been helpful to keeping that connection strong. Number five is nature – seeing nature wake up this spring just really makes me happy! The best florist in the world is momma nature!

My Uncle Bill shared a couple pictures this morning of a beautiful California poppy bloom. The rains made it happen! Something good out of something that has caused a lot of people trouble:

Poppy bloom picture from my Uncle Bill- what a beautiful sight. I can remember last year asking God about orange flowers and the first ones he showed me were these types of flowers growing here!

11 April 2023 Sunshine and Dandelions

Hello to you. How’s your day going? I’m just back from taking Link for a morning drag – he likes to lollygag and dawdle! It’s another beautiful day out. The spring is definitely in full swing right now:

The dandelions are up – first flowers of spring and food for pollinators
Beautiful sunny and cloud filled sky

I was looking for a message of hope today and found this:

May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit. —Romans 15:13

In todays world with so much going on sometimes it’s hard to find hope. In my family and a friend from church new babies have come or are on the way. In these newborns there is much hope for the future. Scrolling through the various platforms I use each day there are lots of puppies, kittens, lambs, kid goats, bunnies and baby birds – life is abundant!

7 April 2023 Hyper Aware and Good Friday

Hello to you. Hope this finds you well. This morning I am feeling hyper aware of my body. It’s uncomfortable but passing thank goodness. When this happens I feel uncomfortable in my body – it’s like all my senses are raw nerves. I took 10mg of Zyprexa and it seems to be helping.

Today is Good Friday – I plan on attending my church’s service this evening. I have never really understood why they call it Good Friday considering what is being celebrated. I don’t think it was a very good day to be Jesus Christ! To be beaten and crucified is a pretty horrible thing. It’s for this reason, and I know all the reasons, I hate crosses. I feel like crosses are as anti-Christ as it gets. Like I said I’ve heard all the justifications as to why he had to die like he did but I still think it’s horrible and cruel. I can remember seeing The Passion of The Christ in the theater with my first husband and we both had nightmares afterwards! It was worse than a horror flick to see that kind of brutality and bloodshed. I know I’m supposed to be grateful that Jesus went through what he did and I am. I just don’t agree on the “good” part. Even with what he went through, this world is full of brokenness and feels ungrateful. I have heard all the reasons for that too! Anyhew – I’m learning and hope there will be another Bible study at some point. I learned a lot during the one I just finished.

2 April 2023 Namesake

If you could have something named after you, what would it be?

If I could have something named after me it would be a park that people could access for free. When I lived in Colorado I used to love to visit Garden of the Gods – it was a beautiful free park. I have always said that if I ever came into a lot of money I would buy a plot of land and make it a park.

Today was Palm Sunday. I got out of bed late but still made it on time. I almost went back to sleep but something inside me decided to rise up and go. I think it was partially because the people at my church are so nice! I love to see their smiles and feel so welcome. I miss them when I don’t go to church.

29 March 2023 God the Gentleman (free will quandry)

Hello to you. How is your today going? I am doing ok. My thoughts are on my quandry about God and free will. I brought this up last night with the ladies in my Bible study. The answers that came from them were all similar. God didn’t make us to be mindless drones and followers of his word. God is a gentleman who gives us choice – to choose to believe in him or not. Nothing is forced. Emily, the leader of the study gave me a good example. She said imagine you have this friend who every time they go out they do the same thing. Like getting drunk and being miserable for it. You know this about them and suggest they not do it but ultimately it’s their choice. Emily was kind of tackling the all knowing God in her example. God knows us better than we know ourselves. He knows what we are going to do and can put other options and choices – better choices- before us but ultimately we make the final call. When I think of the times I’ve been through with my mental health I got myself in a tunnel. I couldn’t see the better choices because I lost control of my ability to see them. In the Christian community they might say the enemy had hold of me.

I read this morning that the Nashville shooter had been suffering. When we are suffering and don’t have faith and trust in God and the enemy is “driving the car” we make, in her case, fatal choices despite what God wants for us.

I am still struggling with the issue of God allowing mass shootings to go on. I feel like there is a lesson we are supposed to be learning and we are not learning it. For example there is no red flag law in Tennessee to prevent troubled people from purchasing weapons or keeping current guns in their possession. May be this case is another example that lawmakers need to make better choices too. Something like red flag laws should be federal law not just up to each state. That’s just my opinion of course. There is just too much inconsistency when it comes to guns in America.

So I’m glad I was able to talk to Emily and the other ladies in Bible study last night about Gods Grace when it comes to tragedy. There have been all kinds lately to include weather related. The people in Mississippi who lost their lives and or homes to tornados. I wonder what God wants us to learn about that or is it beyond God and a combination of man -made factors – climate change for example. I don’t think anybody is completely ready for something like a tornado. I know when we had one when we lived in Texas it took us by surprise even with the weather service warnings! We were grateful for our lives being spared and minimal damage to our property. It’s got to be hard to have everything destroyed like happened to the already poor in Mississippi. What is Gods plan for these unfortunates? I know after the tornado we had it pulled all of us neighbors closer together.

At the bottom of all tragedy, no matter what kind it is, what good can come from it? What can we learn about God and ourselves? We can choose to crumble or learn and rise above it wiser. It really helped me to hear fellow believers explain God as being a gentleman. We are given a choice and we don’t have to wait for tragedy, reaching our bottom in life, to choose Gods will for us. With these tragedies we are seeing the perpetrators are self will run riot. In cases like these mass shootings, fatally so. Passion takes over reason. I wonder if that shooter knew she was unconditionally loved by God if she still would have gone through with her plans.

27 March 2023 Feeling Like Spring

Hello to you how are you today? I hope we’ll. It’s starting to look and feel like spring already here in Idaho. My neighbors flowers are starting to push up through the winter soil. Every time I walk past her yard and see them I feel like smiling. Mother Nature, this earth is so amazing isn’t she? I’m always amazed at how quickly, with just a few elements life is able to happen. Like a construction site where a mound of dirt is pushed off to the side and within a short time it being covered with life. Last year I was awed by a beautiful purple flower growing in a crack in my Aunt and Uncles driveway. God is good! So much evidence of the master of creation.

On a slightly different note, we are trying to break a cycle of going to bed late and getting up late. I try to go to start winding down at 9 pm but often don’t fall asleep right away. I wake up around 8 am automatically no matter what I do. My Aunt, Uncle and therapist have been encouraging me to just get up. I need to practice this – May be make an appt with myself. Make a coffee date or exercise appt- something. Link and I walk in the morning but he likes to dawdle and I wonder if he’s starting to feel his age (like I am!) Anyhew I have been having spinning spells when I move a certain way the past couple of days.

24 March 2023 Communication

Hello to you. Hope this finds you well. Each day my online therapist app Better Health has a suggested topic. Todays topic had to do with what communication looks like. A phrase that came to mind almost immediately was “use your words.” Sometimes I don’t have the clarity I’d like to properly communicate things. This has been happening as I’ve tried to explain what I’m experiencing on a daily basis with the Mal de barque syndrome stuff. People ask me if I’m feeling better with swaying and stuff and the answer is usually no. Like this morning I had a dizzy spell like vertigo. It was very brief – when I rolled over in bed.

I’m scheduled for an MRI on the 19th of April to see what’s going on inside my head. Hopefully nothing that can’t be fixed.

I’ve had a lot of people praying for me through this. I am so grateful for the love and support from my family and friends. God must have some sort of plan in all this.

4 March 2023 Walks With My Dog ( Gratitude)

Hello to you. How is your today? I hope we’ll. Today I find myself grateful for the walks I am able to take with Link. Today he lead me to where a couple neighbors were talking and I was able to say hello and find out we have a stray cat problem. People dumping their unwanteds at the Post Office across the street. One of the men said he’s been feeding a couple of them. He said if I wanted one I was welcome to them. Honestly I don’t know how Link would do with a feral cat as a housemate!

Walking with Link took me past some places where the water still is running freely and that was pretty to see. Getting out with him really is good for me even if it’s kind of tough with the swaying in my head issues. I have a neurology appt this month to further investigate what may be causing me to experience the exaggeration of motion I feel when I walk. I am wondering if Mal de barque syndrome will be the diagnosis and if so will there be anything to be done about it. From what I’ve seen and read there is no cure.

I am just grateful as I write to you for my boy Link. He is a reason to get up each day and to get out in the world.

Link after one of our many walks