Hello to you. This morning on my walk I decided to take a couple pictures:
Most of the roses in the neighborhood are done bloomingA cheerful sunflower I love this tree“Know that being beautiful is the same thing as being yourself “Book my Aunt gave me knowing how much I love trees – Things Trees Know by Douglas Wood
The world is a different place when you walk. If you were to drive through my neighborhood, you would probably miss the things I notice when I’m walking. God is so creative! Most of my neighbors take really good care of their yards and I notice! I hope by my sharing this with you that you are inspired to look at your own neighborhoods with new eyes.
Psalm 24:1New International Version
Psalm 24
Of David. A psalm.
1 The earth is the Lord’s, and everything in it, the world, and all who live in it;
Hello to you. I hope this finds you well. Today’s prompt isn’t easy for me to answer. It should be after all Joy is literally my middle name! There isn’t one habit that springs to mind that brings me genuine joy. Ever since the divorce and changing from Lithium to Depakote feeling genuine emotion has been hard for me. Sometimes it feels like I am an actress playing a part of a human being. Prior to what happened to me about three years ago, I was a very emotional person. Tears and belly laughs came to me easily and that’s just not the case anymore. I have become a very serious person in my old age. I miss the silly and youthful woman I used to be!
The things that use to bring me joy and fulfillment aren’t a part of my life now. I use to crochet, make wire jewelry, experiment in my kitchen, draw, write poems and short stories, take lots of pictures, spend time with nature, sing and dance. The only things I still do is this blog and from time to time is take nature pictures! I guess I just haven’t found a way to completely fill the void getting divorced left in me. Loving Jesus is gradually healing me but it’s taking time! He is the great physician and I know in his time he will restore me to my best self again.
Picture from a walk with my cousin Laura a couple years ago
James 4:8-10New International Version
8 Come near to God and he will come near to you.Wash your hands, you sinners, and purify your hearts,you double-minded. 9 Grieve, mourn and wail. Change your laughter to mourning and your joy to gloom.10 Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will lift you up.
How would you describe yourself to someone who can’t see you?
Hello to you. Hope this finds you well. Today began with prayer with Pastor Jason and Pastor Jim. Always lots to pray for. We prayed for our church and its people. I read the prayer from yesterday’s blog. I talked to Pastor Jason about getting baptized. It’s been tugging at my heart for quite some time! So we are going to do it the last Sunday in September. My family knows so they can be there for it. After prayer I finally got groceries – $200 for just me! The cart was filled with mostly stuff to drink. I am glad I got it over with! I went for a walk after I put everything away and it was kind of a struggle but I made myself do the half mile loop.
Today’s prompt makes me think of Little House On The Prairie. Laura wrote her books in a very descriptive way so that her blind sister Mary could see what she was talking about. I would describe myself as sort of tall and curvy. Short hair with hazel eyes and olive skin (I tan easily). My head is smaller than my body – heart shaped face. I have long arms and long legs. I have a very short waist. Can you see me?
Isaiah 53:2New International Version
2 He grew up before him like a tender shoot, and like a root out of dry ground. He had no beauty or majesty to attract us to him, nothing in his appearance that we should desire him.
Hello to you. It’s Wednesday evening as I write to you. It was hot again so I am glad I got a walk in early. My lower back and hips have been bothering me again so I am going to sit out the second walk this evening. My mind is kind of scattered right now. I’ve been following the headlines and there is so much going on – especially praying for all those in the path of the tsunamis! Living here in Idaho we are pretty blessed in the weather department. We seldom have extremes certainly no tsunami’s!
I’ve been putting off going to the grocery store as long as I can. My fridge is empty except for some yogurts and potatoes- couple frozen meals in the freezer. I don’t love grocery shopping. I looked into having them delivered from Walmart but changed my mind. If I were to start that it would be one more thing to keep me isolated and stay out of shape. Getting groceries, even though I hate it, keeps me engaged with the town I live in. So tomorrow, after meeting for prayer, I will force myself to go get groceries.
Lately I have been a little lonely and bored but things will change as I get into August. I have some medical appts and this next Sunday, after church, I’m looking forward to seeing Tawna and having breakfast and going to Babby Farms animal sanctuary. It’s kind of sad that I have lived here in Middleton going on 5 years and I still don’t really know my neighbors all that well. All the friends I have made are at church! Thank God for that! At least it’s not like it was in Texas – 12 years and just one friend! It’s harder to make friends when we grow up.
A prayer to close:
Dear Jesus I pray for all the lives both human and animal affected by the earthquake and subsequent tsunamis. I pray for all of those affected in our world by violence and war. Especially the children who are not getting their basic needs met each day. Please help the animals in the food systems throughout the world. Let there be mercy and compassion. Help consumers demand more humane treatment of all animals who die each day that humans might live Please help the sick, the poor, the hungry and the homeless of our world. Through those of us that are blessed, may we be your bodies to do your good works in this world. Amen.
John 15:5-8New International Version
5 “I am the vine; you are the branches. If you remain in me and I in you, you will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing. 6 If you do not remain in me, you are like a branch that is thrown away and withers; such branches are picked up, thrown into the fire and burned. 7 If you remain in me and my words remain in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be done for you. 8 This is to my Father’s glory, that you bear much fruit, showing yourselves to be my disciples.
If you won two free plane tickets, where would you go?
Hello to you. It’s Sunday again – the week just flew by! Today was a bit of a struggle to get going – lower back and hip pain. I made some coffee and prayed for relief and it came along with some Biofreeze topical pain medication. All the walking I’ve been doing caught up with me I guess! If I won two plane tickets I would go to Ireland – always wanted to go there.
At church we were in Corinthians again – 2 Corinthians 1:5-11. What Pastor Jason stressed in this was just because we are believers it doesn’t mean everything is easy – sometimes things get really tough. Our hope must remain in Jesus at all times good and bad. It’s easy to believe when times are good. I liken us to being a blade under a blacksmiths hammer- being shaped and molded by the hammer and fire to perfection. Sometimes it takes a long time to make a good sword. For me personally I have been through a lot of tough stuff and ultimately it has been my faith in God that has pulled me through. God has me on his anvil- molding and shaping me:
2 Corinthians 1:5-11New International Version
5 For just as we share abundantly in the sufferings of Christ, so also our comfort abounds through Christ.6 If we are distressed, it is for your comfort and salvation; if we are comforted, it is for your comfort, which produces in you patient endurance of the same sufferings we suffer. 7 And our hope for you is firm, because we know that just as you share in our sufferings, so also you share in our comfort.
8 We do not want you to be uninformed, brothers and sisters,[a] about the troubles we experienced in the province of Asia. We were under great pressure, far beyond our ability to endure, so that we despaired of life itself. 9 Indeed, we felt we had received the sentence of death. But this happened that we might not rely on ourselves but on God, who raises the dead. 10 He has delivered us from such a deadly peril,and he will deliver us again. On him we have set our hope that he will continue to deliver us, 11 as you help us by your prayers. Then many will give thanks on our behalf for the gracious favor granted us in answer to the prayers of many.
I liked this that Pastor Jason quoted:
Job 13:15New International Version
15 Though he slay me, yet will I hope in him; I will surely[a] defend my ways to his face.
Today was also baptism Sunday and I almost went up when he asked if anybody else wanted to be baptized! My family wants to be present when I do it but I think they would forgive me if I just spontaneously did it! It’s definitely on my heart.
Hello to you. Hope this finds you well and staying cool. As I write to you it’s a bright and sunny 94 degrees here in Idaho.
Today started out a little bit earlier than normal. One of my earth angels, my cousin Tony, came and picked me up so we could go to Gowen Field, which is near Boise, so I could update all my files to reflect that I’m divorced. We were blessed that their retiree affairs officer, Bill Fackler, was there to help me with my Survivor Benefit Program (SBP) and finance files to get them to reflect that I’m divorced. Unfortunately you have to update your SBP file within a year of being divorced to stop paying into it and it was 2021 that the divorce was final. At least we were able to get things updated. Bill was fantastic! He has been fishing a couple times with Tony so they got a chance to get caught up while we were there. I went the ID card office and was able to update my DEERs. DEERs is what is used for tracking dependents. It felt really good to get so much done in one place! The folks working there are really friendly and good at what they do. This trip was an answer to my prayers as I had been fretting about getting all this done for quite some time.
On the way back to my house, we stopped at the Sunrise Cafe for breakfast which included a much needed by my cousin, good cup of coffee. Emma, the manager was there – she remembers me when I go there! Another gal, Ria (spelling?)said hello as she remembered me too. There is a reason I love going to that place! It was nice having good company for a delicious breakfast. I had French toast and Tony got a huge pancake he could hardly finish. After breakfast we took a walk together which was nice too. He couldn’t stay long as he had a massage therapist appointment to get to. His back gives him trouble too. It was so nice to have time with Tony. He works a lot and doesn’t get much free time.
Link was happy I was home – he got a couple pieces of bacon which he devoured. I always save a piece or two for him. I kinda feel guilty eating bacon to be honest. I think it’s because there is so much cruelty with the raising and slaughtering of pigs! May be some day there will be a good substitute for the different kinds of meat we eat!
Dear Jesus I give you praise for this day. Thank you for how smoothly things went at Gowen Field. Thank you for Bill Fackler. I thank you for my family, especially my cousin Tony. I pray for Eli who is Tony and Tawna’s little 15 year old dog who is having back and other problems. I pray for all world leaders at all levels of government to have wisdom. I pray for all the animals in captivity that they know kindness and compassion. I pray for the homeless, the sick, the hungry and the poor that they receive relief and mercy. Lastly I pray for the lost who don’t know you or just don’t believe in you Jesus – show them the way. Amen!
Hello to you. It’s another sunny and hot day here as I write to you. I hope this finds you well. If not I hope somehow God will show you how loved you are.
My thoughts this afternoon are about keeping my thoughts in the now. What sparked this was thinking about Link getting older. He’s showing signs of his age already- he will be 11 this December 9th. I can remember all too well how many pieces my heart was shattered at losing 4 pets in close succession when I lived in Texas. Two dogs and two cats – my fur babies Sam, Blondie, Amber and May. I think it was losing them that contributed to my many manic episodes that lead to my frequent hospitalizations. I never had children so they filled that maternal void in me. Losing them was so painful I could barely stand it!
Link is my second son and I try to avoid thinking of how losing him will break my heart again! I am trying to keep my thoughts in the now about him. Cherish each day the good Lord gives us together. I have said I don’t know if I will have another dog or cat after Link. As I stand here now, I don’t know if my heart will be able to take it! I say this now but who knows what God will have for me. Taking in Link helped heal my broken heart!
Dear Jesus I come before you to pray for this world and all its inhabitants. I pray for all the animals and those who are pet owners who may be on the verge of having to say that most painful of goodbyes. I pray for the flood victims and their families in Texas. I pray for the children of war torn regions of this world. I pray for the families struggling to make ends meet in this American economy. I pray for the world’s sick, poor and hungry. We need you now more than ever. I pray all this in your precious name. Amen.
Hello to you. Hope this finds you well. It’s another hot day here in Idaho as I write to you – 91 degrees! I walked about a mile this morning after I got up. I’m trying to walk every day and offset the side effects of the medication I’m taking. Both the Depakote and Olanzapine are known to contribute to weight gain. I need to lose about 100 lbs! I’m tired of carrying all this extra weight.
I wanted to share a praise about how I felt yesterday. I haven’t felt that good in over a month! I finally got relief from anxiety! The Olanzapine (generic Zyprexa) has been making all the difference. The side effect of drowsiness has lead me to restful naps and sleep at night. I hope this lasts!
Oh! I had a very vivid short dream about mosquitos last night. I dreamt some really big ones landed on me and my trying to stop one that had a body that was like a syringe from some man’s neck. When I went to flick it away, some of the fluid in its body got in my mouth – that woke me up! It was like a genetically modified insect. Weird dream! I wonder where that came from?!! I think it’s from hearing about huge mosquitos at the detention center in Florida.
A prayer:
Dear Lord Jesus I pray for this world and all of the life within it. I pray for all the sick, the hungry, the poor and those who are lost in this world because they don’t know you or refuse to surrender to your loving care. I pray for all the lives human beings share this world with and that there can be an end to cruelty and neglect of our fellow animal brothers and sisters. I ask all this in your precious name Jesus. Amen.
Hello to you. Hope this finds you well. I just wanted to give out a praise for answered prayers and God showing me his love through my family the past couple of days. As I mentioned in my previous blog I ran out of Olanzapine and it had been a couple of weeks. I was starting to have a real hard time using Benadryl to get me through. Well after some phone calls today my beautiful friend (my cousins wife) Tawna offered to drive me to the Boise VA to get lab work and pick up refills. Wow! That meant everything! Tawna is another person in my life that God works through and has for quite some time. We enjoyed having time to visit as with her busy life we don’t get to see eachother as much as we would like. The visit to the VA in Boise went really smoothly and took no time at all. Very friendly people there! We got a dose in me and went to our new Dairy Queen for lunch which was really nice and took a little walk. She visited with Link and I for a bit on my porch before she left. I love being with her!
I found out the reason my Dr. has been reluctant to up the dose of Olanzapine is because there are a lot of negative side effects the higher the dosage like weight gain and blood sugar for example. He upped my daily dose by taking it two times a day instead of just once which isn’t too much. I noticed today that it relaxed me quite a bit. With being Bipolar there is a fine line between being high and being low. Without the Olanzapine I was running fast and it’s very uncomfortable!
Bottom line today – God hears our prayers and uses us to help eachother! So blessed!
From my Aunt Ruth today:
“He remembered us in our weakness. His faithful love endures forever.”
Psalm 136:23 (NLT)
Lord, I am so grateful that nothing is impossible for You. Even when I feel overwhelmed by events going on around me. When I feel weak, defeated, helpless, or hurting I am not alone. You already knew I would be here and You continue to show me that You can handle anything. Nothing is a surprise to You! Today, please forgive me for the time that I have not trusted in You. Give me the courage to do Your will and show me how I can glorify Your Name. Thank You for always being there especially when I need You most! Jesus’ Name, my Lord, my God, Amen.
Hello to you. It’s a nice cool morning after a late afternoon thunderstorm yesterday. I got one walk in already! Sparklight, my WiFi provider, is down this morning. Apparently it’s a big outage with no word when it will be back up. Bummer!
This morning is another morning without Olanzapine (the generic for Zyprexa). What happened is I ran out before the next scheduled refill and have been taking Benadryl to get me through. Benadryl is a poor substitute and it wears off quickly plus it gives me the jitters sometimes! My next call with my psychiatrist I need to talk to him about the refill schedule and find out why it’s on a schedule like it is. I don’t have the same problem with refills for the Depakote I’m also taking for my Bipolar condition.
Philippians 4:13. “For I can do everything through Christ Jesus, who gives me strength.”.
To be 