Category: Mental Health

20 July 2025 Answers in Affliction

by saymber, posted in Health, Leading Life by Example, Mental Health, Spirituality and Religion

Hello to you. It’s a bright and cool Sunday as I write to you – only 78 degrees! I am back from church – good messages I needed to hear today. We were in 2 Corinthians 1. What spoke to me was this part:

2 Corinthians 1:3-4New International Version

Praise to the God of All Comfort

3 Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, 4 who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves receive from God.

For going on 4 years I have been experiencing a pooling in my ears and balance issues as a result. I haven’t been officially diagnosed but I believe I have Mal De Debarquement Syndrome. It just won’t go away. I have had a brain scan and have seen an ear doctor and neither of them found anything. I am convinced this was triggered after being tased by police during a manic episode I had about 3 years ago. I had pooling in my ears but not the weeble wobbly sensation in my head. They say some kinds of trauma can trigger it. Every day I pray for healing but God has remained silent for a cure. I pray “let me be your miracle” and nothing has changed. Lots of people pray for me and still God has not moved. At least I am able to walk! I just have to pay close attention and I need to keep trying to lose more weight.

I comfort myself with passages like we read today. For some reason I am staying like this. May be so I can comfort others who have this affliction? For some reason God is not answering the prayers the way I am hoping. May be he has something else in mind!

For more info I got this from: https://my.clevelandclinic.org/health/diseases/24796-mal-de-debarquement-syndrome-mdds

Mal de Débarquement Syndrome (MdDS)

Mal de débarquement syndrome (MdDS) is a rare vestibular disorder that makes you feel like you’re moving even when you’re not. MdDS is common after traveling, especially by boat. In most cases, MdDS symptoms go away within 24 hours. But they can linger for months or even years, in some instances.

16 July 2025 The Now

by saymber, posted in animals, Bipolar life, Home, In the News, Mental Health, Spirituality and Religion, Veteran Affairs
My puppy faced boy Link

Hello to you. It’s another sunny and hot day here as I write to you. I hope this finds you well. If not I hope somehow God will show you how loved you are.

My thoughts this afternoon are about keeping my thoughts in the now. What sparked this was thinking about Link getting older. He’s showing signs of his age already- he will be 11 this December 9th. I can remember all too well how many pieces my heart was shattered at losing 4 pets in close succession when I lived in Texas. Two dogs and two cats – my fur babies Sam, Blondie, Amber and May. I think it was losing them that contributed to my many manic episodes that lead to my frequent hospitalizations. I never had children so they filled that maternal void in me. Losing them was so painful I could barely stand it!

Link is my second son and I try to avoid thinking of how losing him will break my heart again! I am trying to keep my thoughts in the now about him. Cherish each day the good Lord gives us together. I have said I don’t know if I will have another dog or cat after Link. As I stand here now, I don’t know if my heart will be able to take it! I say this now but who knows what God will have for me. Taking in Link helped heal my broken heart!

Dear Jesus I come before you to pray for this world and all its inhabitants. I pray for all the animals and those who are pet owners who may be on the verge of having to say that most painful of goodbyes. I pray for the flood victims and their families in Texas. I pray for the children of war torn regions of this world. I pray for the families struggling to make ends meet in this American economy. I pray for the world’s sick, poor and hungry. We need you now more than ever. I pray all this in your precious name. Amen.

15 July 2025 Feeling Better

by saymber, posted in Animal Rights, animals, Bipolar life, dreams, Health, human rights, Mental Health, Nature, Spirituality and Religion, Veteran Affairs

Hello to you. Hope this finds you well. It’s another hot day here in Idaho as I write to you – 91 degrees! I walked about a mile this morning after I got up. I’m trying to walk every day and offset the side effects of the medication I’m taking. Both the Depakote and Olanzapine are known to contribute to weight gain. I need to lose about 100 lbs! I’m tired of carrying all this extra weight.

I wanted to share a praise about how I felt yesterday. I haven’t felt that good in over a month! I finally got relief from anxiety! The Olanzapine (generic Zyprexa) has been making all the difference. The side effect of drowsiness has lead me to restful naps and sleep at night. I hope this lasts!

Oh! I had a very vivid short dream about mosquitos last night. I dreamt some really big ones landed on me and my trying to stop one that had a body that was like a syringe from some man’s neck. When I went to flick it away, some of the fluid in its body got in my mouth – that woke me up! It was like a genetically modified insect. Weird dream! I wonder where that came from?!! I think it’s from hearing about huge mosquitos at the detention center in Florida.

A prayer:

Dear Lord Jesus I pray for this world and all of the life within it. I pray for all the sick, the hungry, the poor and those who are lost in this world because they don’t know you or refuse to surrender to your loving care. I pray for all the lives human beings share this world with and that there can be an end to cruelty and neglect of our fellow animal brothers and sisters. I ask all this in your precious name Jesus. Amen.

11 July 2025 Answered Prayers

by saymber, posted in Bipolar life, Health, Home, Leading Life by Example, Mental Health, Spirituality and Religion, Veteran Affairs

Hello to you. Hope this finds you well. I just wanted to give out a praise for answered prayers and God showing me his love through my family the past couple of days. As I mentioned in my previous blog I ran out of Olanzapine and it had been a couple of weeks. I was starting to have a real hard time using Benadryl to get me through. Well after some phone calls today my beautiful friend (my cousins wife) Tawna offered to drive me to the Boise VA to get lab work and pick up refills. Wow! That meant everything! Tawna is another person in my life that God works through and has for quite some time. We enjoyed having time to visit as with her busy life we don’t get to see eachother as much as we would like. The visit to the VA in Boise went really smoothly and took no time at all. Very friendly people there! We got a dose in me and went to our new Dairy Queen for lunch which was really nice and took a little walk. She visited with Link and I for a bit on my porch before she left. I love being with her!

I found out the reason my Dr. has been reluctant to up the dose of Olanzapine is because there are a lot of negative side effects the higher the dosage like weight gain and blood sugar for example. He upped my daily dose by taking it two times a day instead of just once which isn’t too much. I noticed today that it relaxed me quite a bit. With being Bipolar there is a fine line between being high and being low. Without the Olanzapine I was running fast and it’s very uncomfortable!

Bottom line today – God hears our prayers and uses us to help eachother! So blessed!

From my Aunt Ruth today:

“He remembered us in our weakness. His faithful love endures forever.”

Psalm 136:23 (NLT)

Lord, I am so grateful that nothing is impossible for You. Even when I feel overwhelmed by events going on around me. When I feel weak, defeated, helpless, or hurting I am not alone. You already knew I would be here and You continue to show me that You can handle anything. Nothing is a surprise to You! Today, please forgive me for the time that I have not trusted in You. Give me the courage to do Your will and show me how I can glorify Your Name. Thank You for always being there especially when I need You most! Jesus’ Name, my Lord, my God, Amen.

10 July 2025 Olanzapine

by saymber, posted in Bipolar life, Health, Mental Health, Spirituality and Religion, Veteran Affairs

Hello to you. It’s a nice cool morning after a late afternoon thunderstorm yesterday. I got one walk in already! Sparklight, my WiFi provider, is down this morning. Apparently it’s a big outage with no word when it will be back up. Bummer!

This morning is another morning without Olanzapine (the generic for Zyprexa). What happened is I ran out before the next scheduled refill and have been taking Benadryl to get me through. Benadryl is a poor substitute and it wears off quickly plus it gives me the jitters sometimes! My next call with my psychiatrist I need to talk to him about the refill schedule and find out why it’s on a schedule like it is. I don’t have the same problem with refills for the Depakote I’m also taking for my Bipolar condition.

Philippians 4:13. “For I can do everything through Christ Jesus, who gives me strength.”.

22 June 2025 Tribulation

by saymber, posted in history, human rights, In the News, Leading Life by Example, Mental Health, Politics and Government, Social media, Spirituality and Religion, Veteran Affairs, Writing and blogging

Hello to you. Today began with church and the message was kind of heavy. We are working our way through the end times in Thessalonians and other scripture – specifically the book of Mark and the tribulation today. Pastor Jason has been trying to break down things so we can understand. With the recent bombing of Iran and events in Israel it’s very timely! What is the purpose of the tribulation? To prepare Israel for its savior and Gods pouring out judgement on unbelieving nations and individuals. The length of the tribulation is 3.5 year cycles. The first 3.5 cycle will see prosperity and peace and the second 3.5 cycle will see destruction and devastation. It feels like we are in a cycle of destruction and devastation but only God truly knows!

I left with a heavy heart. In light of everything that is going on – feeling like so many bad things are happening at once. We have had bad things happen before – it’s how we get our news that makes it seem worse than times before. It used to take months, even years to find out what we find out now in an instant. In an instant we look at our phones and we are inundated with this crime here, storm here, this conflict there. It can feel overwhelming! I have to remind myself that what matters most is my personal relationship with Jesus. As long as I hold fast to my belief in him and how I am in the world I have nothing to worry about. My nightly prayers always include the whole world – especially the children in war torn regions like Gaza. In all the wars around the world it is the children who suffer the most!

Mark 13:19-23New International Version

19 because those will be days of distress unequaled from the beginning, when God created the world, until now—and never to be equaled again.

20 “If the Lord had not cut short those days, no one would survive. But for the sake of the elect, whom he has chosen, he has shortened them. 21 At that time if anyone says to you, ‘Look, here is the Messiah!’ or, ‘Look, there he is!’ do not believe it. 22 For false messiahs and false prophets will appear and perform signs and wonders to deceive, if possible, even the elect. 23 So be on your guard; I have told you everything ahead of time.

19 June 2025 A Psalm For World Peace

by saymber, posted in Bipolar life, history, Home, human rights, In the News, Leading Life by Example, Mental Health, Spirituality and Religion, Veteran Affairs

Hello to you. As I write to you this evening I wanted to find a psalm of peace. There is so much going on – every day it’s something. It’s hard to find comfort anywhere but in God. I hope this psalm I found helps you find some comfort!

Life is fragile handle with prayer

Psalm 46New International Version

Psalm 46[a]

For the director of music. Of the Sons of Korah. According to alamoth.[b] A song.

1 God is our refuge and strength,
    an ever-present help in trouble.
2 Therefore we will not fear, though the earth give way
    and the mountains fall into the heart of the sea,
3 though its waters roar and foam
    and the mountains quake with their surging.[c]

4 There is a river whose streams make glad the city of God,
    the holy place where the Most High dwells.
5 God is within her, she will not fall;
    God will help her at break of day.
6 Nations are in uproar, kingdoms fall;
    he lifts his voice, the earth melts.

7 The Lord Almighty is with us;
    the God of Jacob is our fortress.

8 Come and see what the Lord has done,
    the desolations he has brought on the earth.
9 He makes wars cease
    to the ends of the earth.
He breaks the bow and shatters the spear;
    he burns the shields[d] with fire.
10 He says, “Be still, and know that I am God;
    I will be exalted among the nations,
    I will be exalted in the earth.”

11 The Lord Almighty is with us;
    the God of Jacob is our fortress.

12 June 2025 Laying Our Troubles At The Cross

by saymber, posted in Bipolar life, Leading Life by Example, Mental Health, Music, Nature, photography, Spirituality and Religion, Veteran Affairs, Writing and blogging
Tiger Lillies in bloom at Grace House

Good morning to you. I hope this finds you well. Today’s prayer meeting was just Jeannie and I. The rest of the regulars had stuff going on so we made the best of it. Jeannie had a lot of prayer petitions to lay at the cross for her family especially Roy who fell and cracked his head open recently. He is elderly and lives alone and relies on Jeannie a lot. He needs more than she can give so we are praying his doctor recommends rehab for him. We prayed for our church and the world. What we also prayed for is what’s going on in my head with the pressure and balance in my ears. Everyone has been praying for me about this.

One of my favorite church songs:

God of Wonders

Song by Third Day ‧ 2003

When we finished we agreed that it felt good to lay all our troubles down at the feet of Jesus. Now the challenge is to not pick those things back up and let Jesus do his thing. That’s something my Aunt and Niki talked about yesterday too! I wonder is it a woman thing to want to try and do it ourselves?! Now is the time for faith – believing in the unseen which can be quite a challenge sometimes.

Overview

Lyrics

Other recordings

Lord of all creation
Lord of water, earth and sky
The heavens are your Tabernacle
Glory to the Lord on high

And God of wonders beyond our galaxy
You are holy, holy
The universe declares Your majesty
You are holy, holy
Lord of heaven and earth
Lord of heaven and earth

So early in the morning
I will celebrate the light
As I stumble in the darkness
I will call your name by night

God of wonders beyond our galaxy
You are holy, holy
The universe declares Your majesty
You are holy, holy

Lord of heaven and earth
Lord of heaven and earth
Lord of heaven and earth
Lord of heaven and earth

Hallelujah! To the Lord of heaven and earth
Hallelujah! To the Lord of heaven and earth
Hallelujah! To the Lord of heaven and earth

The God of wonders beyond our galaxy (You)
You are holy, holy
Precious Lord, reveal Your heart to me
Father, holy, holy (Lord God Almighty)

The universe declares Your majesty (You are holy)
You are holy (yes you are), holy (holy You are)
Holy (Jesus saves), holy

Hallelujah! To the Lord of heaven and earth
Hallelujah! To the Lord of heaven and earth
Hallelujah! To the Lord of heaven and earth
Hallelujah! To the Lord of heaven and earth
Hallelujah! To the Lord of heaven and earth
Hallelujah! To the Lord of heaven and earth

Source: Musixmatch

Songwriters: Steve J. Hindalong / Marc Byrd

God of Wonders lyrics © New Spring Publishing Inc., Never Say Never Songs, Meaux Mercy Publishing, Storm Boy Music, Meaux Mercy, New Spring Publishing Inc.

11 June 2025 Sharing Experience, Strength and Hope

by saymber, posted in history, Home, Leading Life by Example, Mental Health, Spirituality and Religion, Veteran Affairs, Writing and blogging

Hello to you! I hope this finds you well. I had a nice visit with my Aunt Ruth and her niece Niki that lives with her today. We had lunch and read from devotionals and I sang the song The Goodness of God . I love that song! Each of us have been through life altering ordeals and find it very therapeutic to share our testimonies of how we came to believe in Jesus. Sharing our experiences, strength and hope reinforces our belief ! Through our individual stories we see that Jesus had a plan for each of us and through the Holy Spirit the doors were flung open for each of us. We just had to see and recognize which doors to enter and which ones to let shut.

Spending time with fellow believers fills a void in me that can only be filled by such gatherings. Today’s gathering was like food for me and we are talking about making it a weekly occurrence.

Goodness of God

Song by CeCe Winans ‧ 2021

Overview

Lyrics

Other recordings

I love You, Lord
For Your mercy never fails me
All my days, I’ve been held in Your hands
From the moment that I wake up
Until I lay my head
Oh, I will sing of the goodness of God

‘Cause all my life You have been faithful
And all my life You have been so, so good
With every breath that I am able
Oh, I will sing of the goodness of God

I love Your voice
You have led me through the fire
In darkest night You are close like no other
I’ve known You as a Father
I’ve known You as a Friend
And I have lived in the goodness of God, yeah

‘Cause all my life You have been faithful, oh yes You have
And all my life You have been so, so good
With every breath that I am able
Oh, I will sing of the goodness of God

Your goodness is running after, it’s running after me
Your goodness is running after, it’s running after me
With my life laid down, I surrendered now
I give You everything, oh Lord
Your goodness is running after, it’s running after me
Your goodness is running after, it’s running after me (oh yeah, oh yeah)
Your goodness is running after, it’s running after me
With my life laid down, I surrendered now
I give You everything
Your goodness is running after, it keeps running after me

And all my life You have been faithful
And all my life You have been so, so good
With every breath that I am able
Oh, I’m gonna sing of the goodness of God
I’m gonna sing

All my life You have been faithful
(All of my life You’ve been faithful)
All my life You have been so, so good
(So good with every breath)
every breath that I am able
(Every breath I’m able)
I will sing (I’m gonna sing)
Of the goodness (of the goodness of God, yes I am)
I’m gonna sing of the goodness of God
Oh, I’m gonna sing of the goodness of God

Source: LyricFind

Songwriters: Ben Fielding / Brian Johnson / Edward Martin Cash / Jason Ingram / Jenn Johnson

Goodness of God lyrics © Bethel Music Publishing, Capitol CMG Publishing

6 May 2025 Praise

by saymber, posted in Bipolar life, Health, Leading Life by Example, Mental Health, Spirituality and Religion, Writing and blogging

Good evening to you. I hope you are well and if you are not I hope you have the support you need. We are living in trying times! I hope you know if you are reading this and are struggling in any way that I and many others are praying for you. You may feel alone but I assure you you’re not. Reach out to Jesus and see him go to work in your life!

I wanted to post a praise. It’s good to have recognition when God answers our pleas for help. In these times it’s good to read good news! My Aunt Ruth just came through a health crisis and there was the possibility she was going to need surgery. She was diagnosed with diverticulitis but there was the possibility she would need surgery to remove infected parts of her intestine. We had been praying for a miracle for her not to need surgery and sure enough she found out today – NO SURGERY! Praise God! Through our faith Jesus is still very much alive and at work!

Here are some examples of Jesus healing in the NIV:

  • Matthew 8:2-4:Jesus cleanses a man with leprosy by saying, “I am willing. Be clean!” and the man is instantly healed. 
  • Matthew 9:20-22:A woman with a hemorrhage, having touched Jesus’s cloak, is immediately healed and told that her faith has healed her. 
  • Luke 5:17-26:Jesus forgives and heals a paralyzed man who is lowered down from the roof. 
  • John 9:Jesus heals a man who was born blind, restoring his sight. 

These are just a few examples, and many other instances of Jesus healing can be found throughout the Gospels in the New Testament.