Category: Health

11 Dec 2025 Low Energy

by saymber, posted in animals, Health, Leading Life by Example, Mental Health, Spirituality and Religion, Veteran Affairs, Writing and blogging

Hello to you. It’s evening as I write to you. Today was pretty uneventful but I did finally get my butt to the grocery store and Link and I got a big walk (1/2 mile) in today. He’s been willing to go so I take him. I am happy his legs aren’t bothering him right now.

Older picture I have of Link wearing his walking gear

The past couple days I have really had low energy. The thing going on with pressure in my head and ears has been real bad. My back hasn’t been kind either. When that’s all going on I don’t want to do even the most menial of tasks. I am like a water spigot that flows either full blast or barely a dribble! I have seen both an ear and head doctor and neither one found what is causing the stuff in my head and ears. We have prayed about it ever since it started but God hasn’t relieved me of it. This bible verse keeps coming into my mind about what I’m going through and what I need to do:

2 Corinthians 12:9New International Version

9 But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. 10 That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.

2 Dec 2025 Pushing On

by saymber, posted in Bipolar life, Health, history, Home, human rights, Leading Life by Example, Mental Health, Spirituality and Religion, Veteran Affairs, Writing and blogging

Hello there, how are you as you visit me here? Today was long and kind of lonely but we have pushed through it. To be honest I have been missing having someone to come home to me. Link has me to look forward to coming home. I think of him as home as he rises up on his back legs and frantically taps at the front door waiting for me to come in. I miss my ex everyday but I know that ship has sailed. We were communicating a little bit but if I don’t initiate the communication there is nothing from him. He has moved on and I always hope he’s happier now.

The rest of this post is me reflecting on where I’ve been and where I hope to go:

I miss having a husband but don’t like what you have to go through to get one these days. I tried Tinder and that was a cluster you know what. I ended up with someone who wasn’t good for me and wanted more from me than I could give at the time. I just wasn’t attracted to him and that made him nuts. My taste is what I had in my ex and I totally blew it with my manic episodes! He just got fed up with the person I became when I was in untreated mania.

I always said that if I couldn’t make it work with Kyle I wasn’t going to make it with anyone. He wasn’t a perfect husband but pretty darn wonderful and I blew it. Some say he shouldn’t have divorced me but they don’t understand the spiral that happens with mania. When we were first together he knew I had mental health issues but I was being treated and was on meds that kept the mania at bay. When mania happened the last couple of times I was really doing things that hurt and or upset him. We were breaking things. He got physical with me a couple of times out of extreme frustration and it was after that he went to stay with his parents. When he could see I wasn’t going to get the help I needed he decided a divorce was the only answer. I didn’t take that decision very well! I felt so lost and alone. My everyday was like living in a haunted house. Memories of Kyle were everywhere I went from the house to the neighborhood. I wasn’t plugged in to Jesus yet but thankfully had people who were to talk to. I thank God for my Idaho family who were there for me – praying for me. They are the reason I am where I am today! Jesus used each of them to help me escape the nightmare I was in.

It took me awhile, even after I was out of Texas, to fully recover from the nightmare I was living. My Aunt Ruth and Uncle John handled me with tender care the 6 months I lived with them. I didn’t want to shower with the door shut. I didn’t want to eat meals at the table. I didn’t want to watch television. I walked constantly to combat my anxiety. I had nightmares. I saw versions of Kyle everywhere I went. Everything was a trigger to my thinking of Kyle. We had been married 12 years and I was married 16 years in my first marriage. I had grief and remorse over my first marriage too! Kyle and I committed adultery and I really felt bad about that as did Kyle. I just unraveled after he left me and felt this pulling sensation in the back of my body all the time. It was like the enemy had a hold on me and didn’t want to let go.

It’s been over 5 years now that I’ve been here in Idaho. I am much better than I was. It’s been about 2 years since I decided to accept Jesus as my savior. I finally made the choice that God had been patiently waiting for me to make. With this choice and my saying yes some doors have opened. I have gotten more involved with my church and that has made me some friends. I even got baptized which I didn’t think I would do. Now if he would only heal me from what’s going on in my head and lower back I could be of more use – a better vessel for the Holy Spirit. These conditions have prevented me from volunteering as much as I could be.

The other thing missing is a companion to share the rest of my life with. I have kind of resigned myself to my ending up being alone the rest of my life but I don’t know Gods plans for me about this. If I do fall in love again I want him to share in my love of Jesus and of course Link must approve of whoever he ends up being!

Thank you for reading!

Dear Jesus I pray for this world as fallen as it is that more of the lost will find their way to you. I pray for the poor, sick, mentally and physically in decline. I pray for all leaders in positions of power and influence that your will be done through their words and deeds. I pray for an end to all animal cruelty. I pray for an end to all wars that there would be peace. I pray for all children especially those being abused and or neglected. I pray for the children suffering in war ravaged parts of the world. Thank you. Amen.

28 Nov 2025 Decisions

by saymber, posted in animals, Health, history, Spirituality and Religion

What’s the hardest decision you’ve ever had to make? Why?

Hello to you. I hope this finds you well in your world and if things are not going well that you have hope in your heart. Remember people all over the world are praying for you.

Today’s prompt calls to mind a couple hard decisions I’ve had to make. One was deciding to have a hysterectomy and never have children. We put my health as the priority. I had fibroid cysts that would have just keep coming back had I not decided to have my lady parts removed. The other decision that immediately came to mind was euthanizing our cocker spaniel Sam – we just didn’t want to let him go! He was so tired and weak when the end finally had to come. Sam was my soulmate and I don’t think I’ll ever have another like him. I’ve told God Sam had better be there in heaven when it’s my time to go!

Revelation 5:13New International Version

13 Then I heard every creature in heaven and on earth and under the earth and on the sea, and all that is in them, saying:

“To him who sits on the throne and to the Lamb
    be praise and honor and glory and power,
for ever and ever!”

29 Oct 2025 Hurricane Melissa

by saymber, posted in Bipolar life, Health, In the News, Mental Health, Spirituality and Religion, Writing and blogging

Hello to you. How are you? I am having one of those days that I’m going to have to push through. Even with taking my medication I’m still having a little trouble! The thing that happens with my head and ears is strong today. Writing about it helps.

Today my prayers go out to the people of Jamaica and those also in the path of Hurricane Melissa in the Caribbean. I can remember what it was like having to evacuate when I lived in Florida and was at technical training in Mississippi. It was so scary! The aftermath and cleanup was so devastating!

https://www.cnn.com/weather/live-news/hurricane-melissa-cuba-bahamas-landfall-wednesday-climate-hnk

Matthew 8:23-27New International Version

Jesus Calms the Storm

23 Then he got into the boat and his disciples followed him. 24 Suddenly a furious storm came up on the lake, so that the waves swept over the boat. But Jesus was sleeping. 25 The disciples went and woke him, saying, “Lord, save us! We’re going to drown!”

26 He replied, “You of little faith, why are you so afraid?” Then he got up and rebuked the winds and the waves, and it was completely calm.

27 The men were amazed and asked, “What kind of man is this? Even the winds and the waves obey him!”

23 Oct 2025 Sleepy vs Tired

by saymber, posted in Bipolar life, Health, Mental Health, Politics and Government, Spirituality and Religion, Veteran Affairs, Writing and blogging

Hello to you. It is evening as I write to you. My thoughts are winding down and soon it will be time for bed. I’m trying to do what my therapist and I talked about on Tuesday. I told her about my troubles falling asleep and her suggestion was that I go to bed when I’m sleepy not just tired. Her advice really resonated with me. I had never really thought of going to sleep that way. When you’re sleepy you will feel it whereas when you are tired it’s more of a cerebral thing. For example I start going to bed at 9 pm and won’t fall asleep til 1-2 am! I usually have to have a nighttime meditation from YouTube on. The one I listen to the most is from the Relax For Awhile Channel with Joanne: https://youtu.be/204EcI6-9Vo?si=_NM2VlXI8PvdFgWZ

I wanted to mention that I am deeply disappointed about what is being done to the east wing of the White House. He’s acting like it’s his own house and can just do whatever he wants to it without permission. It’s our house! Very sad!

John 1:5New International Version

5 The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness has not overcome[a] it.

14 Oct 2025 Restful Sleep

by saymber, posted in Bipolar life, dreams, Health, Mental Health, Spirituality and Religion, technology, Veteran Affairs, Writing and blogging

Hello to you. How is your week so far? Good I hope and if it’s not I am praying for you. I am hoping you have a good support system surrounding you to help you get through whatever you’re facing. There have been several natural disasters – namely flooding in Alaska, Mexico and Arizona and places I haven’t seen reports on. Climate change is wreaking havoc everywhere it seems. I’m glad I live in Idaho as we rarely have extreme weather.

As I write to you this evening, my thoughts are turning to the upcoming battle I am going to have tonight with the darkness – sleep. I can feel tired and turn out the lights and it’s like an invitation for my mind to start racing. It’s not as bad as it was when I was working but it still happens. I have tried different things like trying not to be on my phone so much before bed but I like to have something to listen to which means still interacting with my phone. There is a creator on YouTube named Jason Stephenson I like to listen to but sometimes after his 3 hour meditation an loud ad at the end will wake me up! The same sometimes happens when I listen to Abide audios that have scripture and spiritual messages.

Not getting good sleep causes me to get into an unhealthy pattern. I will want to sleep during the day to make up for not sleeping through the night. It’s very rare that I have dream filled and restful sleep when I’m in such a pattern. I toss and turn a lot trying to get comfortable and poor Link stirs every time I do! Something I will do sometimes is I will ask Jesus for his help in getting to sleep and that helps sometimes. Another thing that I learned long ago when I was doing yoga is to talk to each part of my body. I tell each part to relax and I usually fall asleep before I get through my whole body.

Dear Jesus I pray for all those in the world who need your help in their lives. Whether it be natural disasters or tragic loss of loved ones for whatever reason – please use your body of believers to reach them. Let the lost souls of this world see your power through your body of believers. Jesus will not be mocked!

Galatians 6:7New International Version

7 Do not be deceived: God cannot be mocked. A man reaps what he sows.

7 Oct 2025 The Answer

by saymber, posted in Bipolar life, Health, history, Leading Life by Example, Mental Health, Social media, Spirituality and Religion, Writing and blogging

Hello to you. I’m just back from a beautiful walk. The weather is just perfect! It felt good to walk off the lunch I had with Ruth and John at Burger King after Bible study. They are getting a new roof put on today. When I left them it looked like it was nearly done! Looked good!

Well my prayers were answered regarding yesterdays quandry about whether or not I should share my story here online. The answer from my family and Bible study was a resounding no. It’s just not safe or in my best interest to share so much personal information about myself online. I have already shared bits and pieces in previous blogs if people are curious about my journey. I think what happened when I got baptized was I had some layers of me stripped away. It really was a profound experience that is going to be with me for the rest of my life! It’s like being reborn in a way.

What’s interesting to note is how quickly Jesus answered my question of what to do. I have only been praying and my family has been praying about it for a couple of days. He used the people that love and care for me to give me my answer quickly. I truly believe from experience that believers are the bodies God uses to do his will. I also think the quick answer was to protect me and also give my Aunt Ruth peace of mind. She was really worried about me.

If it is only going to be like a journal it’s not handwritten- it’s on my phone using the notes application. My Aunt and I were trying to figure out if I should print it out or not. She thinks it should only be family that reads it. She is worried other people that aren’t family might treat me differently if they read it. I will continue to talk to Jesus about it as long as it’s on my mind.

Psalm 91:11New International Version

11 For he will command his angels concerning you to guard you in all your ways;

Baptism- Symbol of New Life (Romans 6:3-4): Paul explains that being baptized into Christ means being united with him in his death and resurrection, so that, “just as Christ was raised from the dead by the glory of the Father, we too might walk in newness of life”. 

11 Sept 2025 Never Forget

by saymber, posted in Health, history, Home, human rights, In the News, Leading Life by Example, Mental Health, Spirituality and Religion, Veteran Affairs

Hello to you. Today is the 24th year anniversary of 9/11/01 and I still can remember how surreal that day was. I was stationed at Peterson AFB in Colorado Springs and we were in the middle of a base exercise. I was sleeping when I got a call alerting me to what had happened. I turned on the tv and couldn’t believe what I was seeing! It looked like something from a movie not real life. When I went into work we kept the lights low and I can remember how shocked everybody was. It was like the world had ended! We huddled around eachother, cried and talked in hushed tones. Security was increased and we took turns on 12 hour shifts guarding our buildings. I can remember relearning how to knit during my shifts and making a blue blanket. Do you remember where you were?

I think, like many people did, that such a disaster would pull people together. For a time it did but gradually things went back to “normal.” It’s a little like what happened with Covid in 2020 – our country is still reeling in so many ways from that. The normal we seek has many people my age longing for the 80’s! The time before all the technology of today. Simpler and happier times.

The story of the Tower of Babel makes me think of 9/11:

Genesis 11:1-8New International Version

The Tower of Babel

11 Now the whole world had one language and a common speech. 2 As people moved eastward,[a] they found a plain in Shinar[b] and settled there.

3 They said to each other, “Come, let’s make bricksand bake them thoroughly.” They used brick instead of stone, and tar for mortar. 4 Then they said, “Come, let us build ourselves a city, with a tower that reaches to the heavens, so that we may make a name for ourselves; otherwise we will be scattered over the face of the whole earth.”

5 But the Lord came down to see the city and the tower the people were building. 6 The Lord said, “If as one people speaking the same language they have begun to do this, then nothing they plan to do will be impossible for them. 7 Come, let us go down and confuse their language so they will not understand each other.”

8 So the Lord scattered them from there over all the earth, and they stopped building the city. 9 That is why it was called Babel[c]—because there the Lordconfused the language of the whole world. From there the Lord scattered them over the face of the whole earth.

8 Sept 2025 Doubts

by saymber, posted in Bipolar life, Health, Leading Life by Example, Mental Health, Spirituality and Religion, Veteran Affairs, Writing and blogging

Hello to you. It’s Monday again and a lot happened today. My back pain is creeping back – I was so hoping to be free of it completely! At least I had a day to know what it’s like not to have pain. I will stay in praise even though I’m disappointed.

I had a case of the nerves today. A company, Eco Landscaping, that has been coming out and killing weeds on my gravel, all the sudden jacked up their prices on me with no notice. I have tried calling and texting them and have gotten no response. USAA is handling a charge dispute for me about it. I’m really disappointed this happened as it means having to find another company to come out and provide the service.

The other thing today was I finally called The Cottages here in Middleton about visitation. This is where the doubts come in. The facility is split into two parts. They have the memory care unit where residents are supervised at all times and the other part where residents can come and go as they please. The part we did the Mothers Days baskets this year for was the memory care unit. For the memory care unit visitors are welcome but must be supervised at all times. The more I thought about it I just don’t feel comfortable going by myself to see people that are going to forget I was even there. When I lived in Alvarado Texas my ex and I use to volunteer at the Assisted Living locked ward they had there and some very uncomfortable things happened to us. It wasn’t good for us. With having my own mental health issues, I have to be careful with what I expose myself to. My Aunt, Uncle and cousin were there for me today to riddle things out. They had some suggestions of what I might be able to do. I want to be of service to Jesus but just am not sure how. As I get older, live alone, have physical limitations and am not as confident as I once was when I was married it’s hard to figure it out! May be by my sharing what I’m going through is a way I’m helping? May be writing, something I’ve done for so many years now, is a way to serve God? I appreciate your continued prayers on this!

James 1:6New International Version

6 But when you ask, you must believe and not doubt,because the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind.

6 Sept 2025 A Day Without Pain

by saymber, posted in Bipolar life, Health, Mental Health, Spirituality and Religion, Veteran Affairs

Hello to you. I am writing to you before bed tonight. I couldn’t go to sleep without giving praise for experiencing a day without pain! For the past couple weeks I have been experiencing chronic pain in my back. Today it was completely gone! Knock on wood! I was able to take my evening walk with ease. Thank you to those who have been praying for me. Thank you to Jesus for hearing my pleas! I am planning on calling The Cottages on Monday and if the back pain continues to be gone I should be able bodied for that calling.

Psalm 30:2New International Version

2 Lord my God, I called to you for help,
    and you healed me.