14 November 2021 Safe

Hi. How are you? It’s 806 pm as I write you. Today has been a good day. For those of you that have been following along with me you know driving has been a thing for me. Today I drove the farthest I’ve driven here in Idaho and made it there and back safe….praise God and my guardian Angel! I had a really enjoyable visit with my family – it was a happy birthday!

Tonight I watched a live broadcast of Elevation Church’s Steven Furtick and his message really resonated. Steven had a unique style of preaching – so much energy! Don’t weep for what’s left you, whatever it is. Something better is coming!! Build on what remains. I have endured a lot of losses but a lot of good remains. A lot of good has come. God knows my heart and has not abandoned me to sorrow. Today I was crying for the loss of my husband to divorce and God filled the void with my loving family. I can’t go back….only forwards…..better!

I can remember being in my back yard in Texas crying because my world had gotten so small. I kept playing the song by Mind In A Box called Escape over and over. God had to move so many pieces to answer my pleas. I lost so much but as my new life unfolds I realize there was no other way. God delivered me and my husband. My husband was too young to be trapped as my caretaker and he just couldn’t help me. So many pieces have to move for just one moment….just one prayer.

6 November 2021 Where Does Energy Go

Good morning to you. It’s morning yet in my here and now. Hope this finds you doing well. I have my probably too sweet cup of coffee and my writing buddy Link. I’ve been thinking about something the past couple of days. It has to do with energy.

So you are sitting in a theater watching a movie with a bunch of of other people. The movie has really strong characters. You feel intently about these characters. You cry, you laugh, you get angry and may be even find yourself imagining being in the circumstances of the characters. Then it’s over. Roll credits. After the movie you talk about it. You might read about it in a magazine or on a news feed on your phone. Later comes the award shows and red carpet premiers of the people in the movie. The movie is released to the public and you buy a copy of the film. You watch it again at home . Sometimes you will think of specific lines from the movie and use them in your own life. Eventually comes the day the movie goes on a shelf and it’s not forgotten but superseded by another film. This process I’m talking about applies to television shows too.

What I’ve just described is a life.

There is a tremendous amount of energy focused on these characters born out of imagination. Where does all that energy go when we are done with it? Many of these characters become part of an actor or actress’s identity. They become known for the characters they play and some of those characters are so dark in their nature. I’m thinking of Heath Ledgers Joker and Aaliyahs Akashi. The darkness they bring is often lauded and emulated. It’s not contained on the screen. There is a sort of life lived through our living eyes… our bodies. Whether the character is good or bad they have achieved immortality. There is proof they existed.

It’s not just fictional characters that attain immortality. As I sit here I think of the trillions of “avatars” God has used through time. Some flashing for a mere second and others hours. Think about all the social media posts and YouTube. All those people and these days animals all immortalized. How about books ? Magazines, newspapers and photographs ?

All of us saying in numerous ways “Remember me!” “ I existed!” It kind of makes me ache inside. So much of what we are now is electronic. I have a hard drive full of important stuff and all it took was a couple drops on the tile and I can’t access that stuff anymore! All it takes is a cell phone to stop working and thousands of pictures are lost. The movie, television and book industry is a little more secure by making and selling millions of copies of their merchandise but even that is fading to live stream and online streaming . Existence is fragile in the electronic world. All it takes now is a power outage and tangible immortality is gone.

Where are we headed with all that we have created? I know it’s meant to be entertainment but sometimes it feels like I’m living in a world filled with golden calves. So much energy…so much adoration lavished on these imagined people and worlds. Giants on the big screen so we won’t be bored on our long journey to other worlds together.

To be “saved” usually means to accept Jesus Christ as your savior but what I see in our world is your image being saved on some device. If we didn’t have written copies of the Bible even Jesus would be lost in time. He said he would come back but didn’t say how. How many versions of his life have been made in television and movies?

A lot to think about here. Time keeps marching on. Technology keeps evolving. Where are we headed in out quest to survive? To not be lost in time? To not be bored?

24 October 2021 Tiny Drum

Hi there! I couldn’t wait til tomorrow to tell you about the new addition to my home! My drum arrived just a few minutes ago and boy was I surprised . My new drum is tiny!!

My tiny drum

It’s tiny but makes a great sound. I can imagine playing it shoulder to shoulder with bigger drums. It was kind of a mess when I unwrapped it – covered with dust but I was able to get most of it cleaned off.

The other exciting thing that happened today was I bit the bullet and started the Meetup group. It’s called Connect Middleton Idaho. I planted a seed and hopefully it will bear good fruit. Part of me is really nervous about it but I feel it in my heart. In my heart this feels like the path God wants me to go.

All of this is me trying to find myself again. Thank you for taking this journey with me .

23 October 2021 Patience

Good morning – least that’s what it is here. How are you? I’m sitting here with a cold cup of coffee thinking about the word that came to me on the morning walk. It was patience.

“Adopt the pace of nature; her secret is patience. “ Ralph Waldo Emerson

Patience has never been one of my strong suites! Especially when it comes to waiting for God. I will talk to God about something and more times than not expect an answer right away and that’s just not how things work . There are so many pieces that have to move to answer a prayer! Like for instance what I have been talking about with starting a meetup group in my town. Even if I pay the money to start the group there is no guarantee people will just magically appear! It could take months or even more before even one person signs up. How much patience do I have? I’m not sure if people in my town even know Meetup exists! Will anyone here want to play a drum?

All I can do is try!

Will anyone join me ?

“Little drummer girl blowing in the wind, where does this journey end when it has yet to begin? Take your drum and play a beat trust in God new souls to meet. The lonely days will soon pass away for just how long only you can say. Be patient drummer girl your on the path to new days. You will soon be shoulder to shoulder where everybody plays .”

22 October 2021 Baby Steps

Hi. It’s me again. I’ve been doing some thinking about the drum circle idea. I watched a few videos like this one that talks about how to facilitate a drum circle: https://youtu.be/aIkPn6FPpGE

A friend of mine suggested the meetup group idea again. Just invite people to show up at a local park with their instrument. I liked that idea but we would probably have to wait until spring and summer to do that unless there was some other place to meet! It gets pretty cold here!

Baby steps……. Drum ordered….check!

I also watched several videos today of actual drumming circles. When you hear the sound of drums you can’t help but want to dance. I saw one done in Garden of the Gods and wished I could be there. That was one of my favorite places to visit when I lived in Colorado Springs: https://youtu.be/DBtopjy46Mw

Gradually something is manifesting. Currently there are no meetup groups for my town. They are primarily in Boise which is our largest city. I am currently wrestling with the idea of being the first to want to try and get something going in Middleton. Do I want the responsibility?!

What I like about the idea of a drum circle is you don’t have to read music to participate. I am going to try and learn some of the patterns but no matter where I’m at I can join. What I noticed in the videos I watched is the range of ages participating. You have little kids to seniors that play. I really like this idea. It makes me warm inside to think of meeting with like minded people in one of our parks and having a jam session!

I’ll keep you posted. Like I said something is manifesting and it’s going to be good!

I would love to hear from you if you have ever been part of a drum circle or have organized one.

19 October 2021 Immortality

Hello to you. How is your day going? I got out and did a lap around the neighborhood. I’ll probably need to go a little later to get a mile in. It’s so pretty out!

The past couple of days I’ve been watching AI interpretations of what people from old times would look like today. The reference material used is photographs, paintings, statues and even mummies. Yesterday as I watched a female mummy resurrected for a moment, I found myself asking was this what she had in mind being mummified? Did she and the people of her time know they would become immortals?

In our modern world there are so many ways for even the most poor to become immortal. In addition to all the traditional ways there are so many more now that we have AI. The problem that I see however is a lot of the new ways rely on systems that can fail. What if YouTube or Facebooks servers went down and data couldn’t be retrieved? I had an external hard drive that hit the tile one too many times. I can’t get the pictures, videos and documents unless I pay someone! What happens when you drop your cell phone and all your pictures were on it? Immortality of this age is so fragile!

As a child I wanted to be immortal. I wanted to be a famous singer, writer, dancer and artist. My stepmom said something profound about that though, she said “ Jackie you don’t have to be famous to be somebody.” Back then I was going to Catholic Church. There is a part of me that still longs for the immortality I wanted as a child. My grown up self knows those ships have sailed. The modern world of immortals is for the young even though those who are older have most of the money !

Something interesting in the world of AI and spirituality is the word SAVED. This word and concept is equally important in both worlds. It means immortality. For example there is an 8mm film I have of my family, all of them except my dad are deceased. When I watch it they live again. Through my living eyes they have life. They all believed in Jesus Christ. Without that video and other pictures of them that have been “saved” they would just be names on tombstones…..names written in bibles.

I’m at the time in my life when one starts to think of things like this. I have a trunk full of journals and drawings will they stand the test of time? Have I secured my immortality? Much of my hand written stuff is in cursive writing. In many schools they have stopped teaching cursive writing! I have no children to pass “myself” on to. Will my life just end up being a time capsule in a landfill?

What does immortality mean to you? Why do you do what you do in this life? Lately I have been questioning that a lot. It seems like our world is going through an identity crisis. Are we doing things that have meaning or just to survive? If we were able to do what we truly enjoy doing would we have so much consumerism? For some their immortality is in how many possessions they have.

“Through the veil comes a whisper,”remember me.”

8 October 2021 Gray Skies

Hello there! How are you doing today as you visit me here? I’m sitting here with a cup of coffee surrounded by gray skies. I’m hoping it will rain. We really need the water!

The past couple of days I’ve been enjoying some YouTube videos about people making electric guitars. One of my favorite instruments! Burls art did a build in the woods that turned out really good: https://youtu.be/eqkJXjr0sz8

Burls has done some really unique builds like Legos, paper, infinity mirror, epoxy resin and many more. I like watching people make things. May be one day I will get back to making things myself !

I have never learned how to play an instrument. I play by ear as I never learned to read music. I have a couple recorders I take out now and again as well as a lap harp.

I used to have a drum up until I ruined it during one of my episodes. I really like the drum! May be I need to watch some videos about how to make them. I’ll never forget the coffee can drum my mom made for me when I was a child. I would take it and drum under the stars. It was just a coffee can covered with duct tape!

Do you play an instrument ?

https://youtu.be/Svg_fIoHij8 – Andrew Huang making music with household items

Another fun video. It made me think of the show Glee. Music can chase away the feelings that gray days conjure up .

“Gray skies roll in like a blanket on my soul, my spirit a faint spark to pay the toll . Twisting and turning layers of gray, looks like the dimming and shadow are here to stay . It’s a gray skies day we wait for celestial tears to fall, to give us life giving water one and all .”

11 March 2021 Blue Sky “Wow”

Hello and good morning to you. How are you doing in your day thus far? I hope you are well. This morning I was seeking a topic and asked God about it and then almost on cue a huge formation of birds appeared in the sky! At first there were no words just the sound of the birds. Then the first word that came to my mind was “WOW!” The sky was such a clear blue so I could see the birds really clearly. I of course didn’t have any camera other than my two eyes. I guess this amazing sight was just for God and I to witness….”just for us.” Sometimes there are no words to be had just an awe inspiring sight. So much happens in the sky that if your not paying attention you will miss.

Genesis 1:8 NIV

“God called the expanse “sky” and there was evening and there was morning – the second day

“blue sky” in the English Ordinal system equals 95 (no sensory experience – this makes sense as you can’t sense the sky, the sky just is)

9 May 2020 Superman

Hello to you. How are you doing today as you visit here?  I hope this finds you well.  I’m kind of in a weird space inside.  Every time I turn on the news I feel more anxious.  I’m still waiting for the good news that this whole Covoid 19 pandemic is behind us!   Wouldn’t it be nice to have a bunch of Superhero’s and or meta humans like the The Flash to help us out?

My superman

I’m finding comfort in telling stories.  I hope they are they are enjoyable to you too.  The inspiration for what I’m writing today came from the time before finding my current husband.  I can remember looking up to the stars and asking, “where are you?”  One of my husbands and my favorite superhero’s is Superman.   I know there are a bazillion different renditions of how Superman came to be – mine cuts through the chase of all the baby stuff lol.

———————————————————–

It was a long long time ago, well may be not that long ago, a lonely woman was standing out in the darkness.  Her weary eyes scanned the dark night sky.  She whispered under her breath, “Where are you?!  I am lost.  God can you hear me?”  The vast sea of stars seemed to respond to her words.  A single star stood out from all the others and twinkled at her extra special brightly.  Speaking in star speak so to speak!

Many moons, stars and suns passed and the lonely woman began to wonder if she had been forgotten.  Again she found herself standing out under the night sky and just as she began to speak, a familiar star shot out across the sky!  She exclaimed  to the darkness, “Is that you?!”

Now star time and human time are not the same.  A single day for a human is light years for a star.  It takes a long time for messages to travel back and forth but they do get exchanged.  Little did that woman know that many miles away from where she was standing that shooting star landed on earth.  The surprising thing was it was no longer a star but had transformed into a man.  The man knew why he was there and knew either he had many miles to travel or the one who had summoned him to earth did!

There were many rotations of earth.  There were many risings and settings of the sun and moon.  There were many rotations of the constellations  before the man from the stars and the woman would meet.  When they did finally meet she had one word for him, “Superman.”


“Superman” in the English Ordinal system equals 107

“starman” in the English Ordinal system equals 86

So it’s Saturday.   It’s looking like the weather is going to be really nice out.  Tomorrow is Mother’s Day in case you forgot.  I hope you have a wonderful day.  I’ll probably be back later.  Writing seems to be helping me adjust to what I’m going through right now.

Love the blue guitar he uses!

 

 

 

 

 

 

5 May 2020 Uncomfortable Silence

Hello to you.  How are you doing today?  Hopefully you are doing well.

Something that comes to mind this morning is the phrase uncomfortable silence.  As I write, I’ve got an alternative station I found that I like, 103.7 fm on as background noise.  I’m getting to be one of those kind of people that has to have the sound on in my world.   That thing called comfortable silence is uncomfortable for me and it never used to be.

 

This radio used to belong to my brother-in-law Todd – still useful!

My mother-in-law used to follow ratings for television shows.  I seem to remember her talking about CSI was one that always had high ratings.  What was behind that a certain demographic, usually older Americans, put the show on as background noise even if they weren’t watching it.  I though that was funny at the time until this situation of having to stay home alone more!  I’m becoming one of those people!

So today I give thanks for local programming and the radio stations that keep the world interesting for me.  Right now I don’t have access to streaming services without paying for it.  I’m trying Amazon Prime video and took a look at Patrick Melrose yesterday.  I couldn’t get through the first episode.  It was hard to see Benedict Cumberbatch being such a convincing addict.  I much prefer seeing him as Sherlock Holmes (minus the addict part) and Dr. Strange!  There are some other interesting shows to check out whilst I work on my afghan.

I find myself going a bit stir crazy staying in the house so I’ll meander out for a walk.  This isn’t such a bad thing as I gained some weight during my hospital stay.  I’m starting to remember why one can lose your mind a bit being trapped in the house.  In the past, it was just because of extremes of weather.  I can remember being in a shelter in Mississippi  during a hurricane and how tough that was.  I was in a shelter with a bunch of other people and it was dark and even smelly at times.  We ate peanut butter and crackers in the dark.  As tough as that was,  there was an end in sight.  With this virus and containment,  there doesn’t seem to be a definitive end.  I understand better why there are protesters in different placing demanding things get opened back up.  We are social creatures and are made to do stuff besides staying at home.

I wonder if this is the plants way of healing itself?  For all the bad things that have happened and tragedy, good things have been happening for the planet.   The biggest thing is a reduction in air pollution!  I wonder how can we keep that going once life starts to resume it’s course?

https://nypost.com/2020/04/07/3-ways-the-coronavirus-is-a-boon-to-the-environment/

ITOE6561 4 May 2020 Breaking through marker picture Jackie Wygant Alvarado TX

First drawing with markers – thinking of breaking through barriers in my life.

“a uncomfortable silence” in the English Ordinal system equals 213 – (ironically month and day I was born!)