6 Oct 2025 Safety in Sharing

Hello to you. I’m just back from a cool walk around the block. It’s really starting to feel and look like fall. Yesterday my Aunt and Uncle had me over for some cozy beef stew and a new episode of one of our favorite Britbox shows Sister Boniface. It was kind of sad as it seems like the show may be ending by how the episode ended.

The topic today is because I have finally, after many years, started putting to words my experiences as a Bipolar person. Specifically what has happened to me through manic episodes. I had started on it a year ago and picked it back up yesterday. It was like my brain just was dumping all kinds of memories. I could probably write a book there is so much! Anyhew I was talking about this thing I’m doing with my dear friend Tawna and she was wondering what I was going to do with it. I said I wanted to share it in my blog and she expressed concern. She suggested that may be I should get an impartial party to read it first – for safety’s sake. I just don’t know who. She suggested somebody like my Pastor Jason but he’s already got so much on his plate! What I need is an editor to read it and get it streamlined. I will continue to pray about it. I will say putting together all these things really stirred me up. Once I got started everything came back. I keep thinking that what I’ve been through wasn’t for no reason. I’ve been through so much these 57 years. It’s been about 23 years of those 57 of being Bipolar. Maybe sharing my story will help someone? How much is too much to share on social media? Your feedback is welcomed.

Matthew 24:27-31 (NIV):

“For the Son of Man will come with the glory of his Father in the company of his angels, and then he will reward everyone according to what they have done… “Then will appear the sign of the Son of Man in heaven. And then all the peoples of the earth will mourn when they see the Son of Man coming on the clouds of heaven, with power and great glory”. 

    22 Sept 2025 Follower of Christ

    Good evening to you. I wasn’t going to touch this topic but after seeing this clip I had to share it. The Jesus I know and love isn’t the same one coming out of the White House and other parts of the country.

    https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZP8SbNxTn/ – Rev Peter Preble message about wanting to be called a follower of Jesus Christ vs a Christian because the label of Christian has been co-opted by the wrong people.

    Beauty in the setting sun
    Setting sun on walk

    As the day draws to a close, I thank you dear Jesus for allowing me to walk with you tonight. With you in my life I am never truly alone. I love you and give you thanks for my life such as it is. Thank you! 🙏

    21 Sept 2025 Strength in Weakness

    Hello to you. I’m just home from church – today marks our 9th year anniversary as a church. The church has grown so much from even when I started coming. I sat with my friend Jeannie and her brother-in-law Roy who was having trouble getting around today. Pastor Keith Waggoner from the Nampa campus we came from gave a great sermon. Today’s message really resonated with me:

    2 Corinthians 12:7-10New International Version

    7 or because of these surpassingly great revelations.Therefore, in order to keep me from becoming conceited, I was given a thorn in my flesh, a messenger of Satan, to torment me. 8 Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me. 9 But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. 10 That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.

    I have been praying for God to heal me from what ails me for several years now and he has not moved. I believe that what is happening to me is similar to what Paul was talking about. If I was in perfect health I might not turn to God like I do. I might become conceited. God has walked with me through a lot – being bipolar, balance issues and chronic back pain. When I was in AA many years ago, he delivered me from alcoholism, chronic skin picking, smoking and bulemia. I have been through a lot in this life and God has been there every step of the way. Just because he hasn’t healed me completely doesn’t mean he’s absent. He has a plan!

    Next Sunday I am being baptized. They have asked me to give a testimonial so I will work on that this week! God is moving in my life!

    20 Sept 2025 Fall Is Coming

    Hello there. How are you? I’m just back from my evening walk – just one time around the big block today. My back continues to be a nuisance so I have to be careful. I have been feeling something in the air lately – fall is coming. There is an anticipation in the trees and the rest of nature. I love how cozy fall can make life seem. The warmer clothes come out. Hot cocoa with marshmallows gets made. A fire gets lit in the fireplace. Candles get lit. The days get shorter. All of these and more rituals of fall are coming. Do you like fall? The only thing I don’t like is having to take up leaves!

    It’s easier to think about changing seasons than it is about what is happening to our world right now. I pray for our country and this world every day. I pray for our leadership at all levels as they are being challenged so greatly. I pray for our fire fighters, police and first responders. The world is a very dangerous place for them. I pray for the men, women and children trying to survive in war torn regions of this world. I pray for the poor, sick and homeless. I pray for all neglected and abused animals. Jesus we lift up this broken world to you – there are some things we cannot fix without your divine intervention. Have mercy on us – please hear our prayers!

    Oh and I wanted to mention there have been a couple recent blips on the radar with regards to UAPs:

    https://www.nbcnews.com/news/amp-video/mmvo247250501553

    12 Sept 2025 Turning To God

    Hello to you. As I write to you tonight, I have a heavy heart. With the recent murders of Charlie Kirk and Iryna Zarutska and so many others that don’t make the headlines, it’s just a really sad time for America. It feels like every day we are being fed negative news. We can’t catch our collective breath! What I’m having to do is turn to God and pray for our country…for this world. I want to use my words here to lift up the spirits of those who intentionally or unintentionally visit my blog.

    I would ask you reader what are you grateful for today? I am grateful for the savior who unconditionally loves me. When everything is dark there is light in Jesus and giving thanks. What we focus on the most gains the most power. I want to focus my personal power on the good in this world even though that is so hard to do right now.

    My prayer for today:

    Dear Jesus the people of this world need to know you now more than ever. I pray that those who are casting about and are lost will be lead to your loving and merciful light. I pray for the truth of what you taught us how to love one another, your creations and you would take center stage. I pray especially for the children that are the innocent in the affairs of adults. They should be able to go to churches and schools free from fear. I also pray for all animals that you would intercede for those being needlessly abused and neglected. Thank you holy father!

    Mark 10:13-16New International Version

    The Little Children and Jesus

    13 People were bringing little children to Jesus for him to place his hands on them, but the disciples rebuked them. 14 When Jesus saw this, he was indignant. He said to them, “Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of God belongs to such as these. 15 Truly I tell you, anyone who will not receive the kingdom of God like a little child will never enter it.” 16 And he took the children in his arms,placed his hands on them and blessed them.

    11 Sept 2025 Never Forget

    Hello to you. Today is the 24th year anniversary of 9/11/01 and I still can remember how surreal that day was. I was stationed at Peterson AFB in Colorado Springs and we were in the middle of a base exercise. I was sleeping when I got a call alerting me to what had happened. I turned on the tv and couldn’t believe what I was seeing! It looked like something from a movie not real life. When I went into work we kept the lights low and I can remember how shocked everybody was. It was like the world had ended! We huddled around eachother, cried and talked in hushed tones. Security was increased and we took turns on 12 hour shifts guarding our buildings. I can remember relearning how to knit during my shifts and making a blue blanket. Do you remember where you were?

    I think, like many people did, that such a disaster would pull people together. For a time it did but gradually things went back to “normal.” It’s a little like what happened with Covid in 2020 – our country is still reeling in so many ways from that. The normal we seek has many people my age longing for the 80’s! The time before all the technology of today. Simpler and happier times.

    The story of the Tower of Babel makes me think of 9/11:

    Genesis 11:1-8New International Version

    The Tower of Babel

    11 Now the whole world had one language and a common speech. 2 As people moved eastward,[a] they found a plain in Shinar[b] and settled there.

    3 They said to each other, “Come, let’s make bricksand bake them thoroughly.” They used brick instead of stone, and tar for mortar. 4 Then they said, “Come, let us build ourselves a city, with a tower that reaches to the heavens, so that we may make a name for ourselves; otherwise we will be scattered over the face of the whole earth.”

    5 But the Lord came down to see the city and the tower the people were building. 6 The Lord said, “If as one people speaking the same language they have begun to do this, then nothing they plan to do will be impossible for them. 7 Come, let us go down and confuse their language so they will not understand each other.”

    8 So the Lord scattered them from there over all the earth, and they stopped building the city. 9 That is why it was called Babel[c]—because there the Lordconfused the language of the whole world. From there the Lord scattered them over the face of the whole earth.

    10 Sept 2025 The Abyss

    Hello there! How are you? I hope this finds you well. The back pain is back but I’m trying not to focus on it! I appreciate your prayers!

    Last night I had a good telephone call with a friend and we talked about something I haven’t talked about here for awhile. It was about the abyss that exists in all of us that we often unsuccessfully try to fill with worldly things. When I was an alcoholic, I used alcohol to try and fill myself up. When I was a fan girl for a musician or actor I filled myself up with their music and films. It was all so fleeting! It was an obsession.

    Millions of people are rabid fans of people like Yungblud, Lady Gaga, Ozzie Osbourne, and Taylor Swift. Back in the day for me it was Prince, David Bowie, Benedict Cumberbatch and Jonathan Rhys Meyers. I drew their images and followed everything they did. There works temporarily filled the void inside me. When David and Prince died it left a huge void in me and was part of one of my manic episodes. Davids music got me through so many hard times especially my teens. It was a couple years ago that I realized my fandom was akin to idol worship and I pulled the plug on all of it. There is only one king worthy of worship! Once I completely surrendered to Jesus nothing else mattered. I realized these celebrities were almost acting like they were Gods – trying to be immortal , omnipresent and making a lot of money off of their worshippers! They are famous because we give them our time and lots of money. So many young people worship these performers and when times get tough they fall back on worshipping these celebrities instead of God. The celebrities are tangible to them whereas God doesn’t seem to be.

    Only one thing fits into the void inside of me and that is God….things of the Spirit. I’ve known this for quite some time but I wandered off several times. As human beings we want a tangible “Jesus”. Like with The Chosens Jonathan Roumies Jesus. He is currently bringing a tangible Jesus to us. It’s tempting to fall into the idol trap. No matter how many times he emphasizes that he’s an actor portraying Jesus there will be those who think he’s the second coming! It must be so hard to be him right now in a world that so wants and needs Jesus to return.

    Since I have put Jesus in the abyss that is inside me I know that I am never completely alone. I can talk to him anytime. A tangible Jesus lives and breathes through the people he has surrounded me with. My family and friends are the body of Jesus in my life.

    Exodus 20:3-6New International Version

    3 “You shall have no other gods before[a] me.

    4 “You shall not make for yourself an image in the form of anything in heaven above or on the earth beneath or in the waters below. 5 You shall not bow down to them or worship them; for I, the Lord your God, am a jealous God,punishing the children for the sin of the parents to the third and fourth generation of those who hate me, 6 but showing love to a thousand generations of those who love me and keep my commandments.

    Matthew 25:34-40New International Version

    34 “Then the King will say to those on his right, ‘Come, you who are blessed by my Father; take your inheritance, the kingdom prepared for you since the creation of the world. 35 For I was hungry and you gave me something to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink, I was a stranger and you invited me in, 36 I needed clothes and you clothed me,I was sick and you looked after me, I was in prison and you came to visit me.’

    37 “Then the righteous will answer him, ‘Lord, when did we see you hungry and feed you, or thirsty and give you something to drink? 38 When did we see you a stranger and invite you in, or needing clothes and clothe you? 39 When did we see you sick or in prison and go to visit you?’

    40 “The King will reply, ‘Truly I tell you, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers and sisters of mine, you did for me.’

    3 July 2025 The Chosen Season 5

    Hello to you. I just got back from another walk. It’s overcast so it was cooler. I am trying to get more laps in each day in my quest to lose weight. I haven’t been taking Link as he’s been having trouble with his back left leg. He’s starting to show his age! Ugh! I hate it but it’s just the way it is having fur babies.

    Today I binge watched Season 5 of The Chosen. It was really heavy! So much sorrow! It must have been hard for the cast especially Jonathan Roumie who plays Jesus. I found myself feeling anxious and sad through most of the episodes. They left the season off with a Judas kiss – next season is going to be even tougher to watch but I will!

    Luke 22:7-20New International Version

    The Last Supper

    7 Then came the day of Unleavened Bread on which the Passover lamb had to be sacrificed. 8 Jesus sent Peter and John, saying, “Go and make preparations for us to eat the Passover.”

    9 “Where do you want us to prepare for it?” they asked.

    10 He replied, “As you enter the city, a man carrying a jar of water will meet you. Follow him to the house that he enters, 11 and say to the owner of the house, ‘The Teacher asks: Where is the guest room, where I may eat the Passover with my disciples?’ 12 He will show you a large room upstairs, all furnished. Make preparations there.”

    13 They left and found things just as Jesus had told them. So they prepared the Passover.

    14 When the hour came, Jesus and his apostlesreclined at the table. 15 And he said to them, “I have eagerly desired to eat this Passover with you before I suffer. 16 For I tell you, I will not eat it again until it finds fulfillment in the kingdom of God.”

    17 After taking the cup, he gave thanks and said, “Take this and divide it among you. 18 For I tell you I will not drink again from the fruit of the vine until the kingdom of God comes.”

    19 And he took bread, gave thanks and broke it, and gave it to them, saying, “This is my body given for you; do this in remembrance of me.”

    20 In the same way, after the supper he took the cup, saying, “This cup is the new covenant in my blood, which is poured out for you.[a]

    29 June 2025 Who To Believe In

    Hello to you. It’s a balmy 83 degree Sunday as I write to you. I got my walk in before it got too hot!

    Went to church today and it was interesting. I was greeted by little Dorothy who I think she said she’s 6 years old. She is a hugger and always hugs me when she sees me. Such a sweetheart. The message today came from Brad out of Revelations. We learned more about the end times – specifically the Antichrist and the beasts- false prophets. What I liked was hearing about who we should believe in. Not a political party or government but Jesus Christ. Back when Revelations was first relevant it was the Roman Empire now in our time it’s the MAGA movement and United States government. Don’t follow them – get into the Bible and the teachings of Jesus – follow him! I am happy the leaders of our church brought this up today!

    Revelation 13New International Version

    The Beast out of the Sea

    13 The dragon[a] stood on the shore of the sea. And I saw a beast coming out of the sea. It had ten horns and seven heads, with ten crowns on its horns, and on each head a blasphemous name. 2 The beast I saw resembled a leopard, but had feet like those of a bearand a mouth like that of a lion. The dragon gave the beast his power and his throne and great authority.3 One of the heads of the beast seemed to have had a fatal wound, but the fatal wound had been healed.The whole world was filled with wonder and followed the beast. 4 People worshiped the dragon because he had given authority to the beast, and they also worshiped the beast and asked, “Who is like the beast? Who can wage war against it?”

    5 The beast was given a mouth to utter proud words and blasphemies and to exercise its authority for forty-two months. 6 It opened its mouth to blaspheme God, and to slander his name and his dwelling place and those who live in heaven. 7 It was given power to wage war against God’s holy people and to conquer them. And it was given authority over every tribe, people, language and nation. 8 All inhabitants of the earth will worship the beast—all whose names have not been written in the Lamb’s book of life, the Lambwho was slain from the creation of the world.[b]

    9 Whoever has ears, let them hear.

    10 “If anyone is to go into captivity,
        into captivity they will go.
    If anyone is to be killed[c] with the sword,
        with the sword they will be killed.”[d]

    This calls for patient endurance and faithfulness on the part of God’s people.

    The Beast out of the Earth

    11 Then I saw a second beast, coming out of the earth.It had two horns like a lamb, but it spoke like a dragon. 12 It exercised all the authority of the first beast on its behalf, and made the earth and its inhabitants worship the first beast, whose fatal wound had been healed. 13 And it performed great signs,even causing fire to come down from heaven to the earth in full view of the people. 14 Because of the signs it was given power to perform on behalf of the first beast, it deceived the inhabitants of the earth. It ordered them to set up an image in honor of the beast who was wounded by the sword and yet lived. 15 The second beast was given power to give breath to the image of the first beast, so that the image could speak and cause all who refused to worship the image to be killed. 16 It also forced all people, great and small, rich and poor, free and slave, to receive a mark on their right hands or on their foreheads, 17 so that they could not buy or sell unless they had the mark,which is the name of the beast or the number of its name.

    18 This calls for wisdom. Let the person who has insight calculate the number of the beast, for it is the number of a man.[e] That number is 666.

    22 June 2025 Tribulation

    Hello to you. Today began with church and the message was kind of heavy. We are working our way through the end times in Thessalonians and other scripture – specifically the book of Mark and the tribulation today. Pastor Jason has been trying to break down things so we can understand. With the recent bombing of Iran and events in Israel it’s very timely! What is the purpose of the tribulation? To prepare Israel for its savior and Gods pouring out judgement on unbelieving nations and individuals. The length of the tribulation is 3.5 year cycles. The first 3.5 cycle will see prosperity and peace and the second 3.5 cycle will see destruction and devastation. It feels like we are in a cycle of destruction and devastation but only God truly knows!

    I left with a heavy heart. In light of everything that is going on – feeling like so many bad things are happening at once. We have had bad things happen before – it’s how we get our news that makes it seem worse than times before. It used to take months, even years to find out what we find out now in an instant. In an instant we look at our phones and we are inundated with this crime here, storm here, this conflict there. It can feel overwhelming! I have to remind myself that what matters most is my personal relationship with Jesus. As long as I hold fast to my belief in him and how I am in the world I have nothing to worry about. My nightly prayers always include the whole world – especially the children in war torn regions like Gaza. In all the wars around the world it is the children who suffer the most!

    Mark 13:19-23New International Version

    19 because those will be days of distress unequaled from the beginning, when God created the world, until now—and never to be equaled again.

    20 “If the Lord had not cut short those days, no one would survive. But for the sake of the elect, whom he has chosen, he has shortened them. 21 At that time if anyone says to you, ‘Look, here is the Messiah!’ or, ‘Look, there he is!’ do not believe it. 22 For false messiahs and false prophets will appear and perform signs and wonders to deceive, if possible, even the elect. 23 So be on your guard; I have told you everything ahead of time.