Hello to you. How are you ? I hope this finds you well. I am doing ok. I had my first dose of Ambien last night and it didn’t interfere with my sleep which was a good thing. It sometimes takes awhile to see what different medicines will do.
The positive emotion I feel the most is gratitude. I’m so grateful to God, the people and animals that are in my life. So much of how my life is right now is thanks to God. My life is manageable and not more than I can handle.
“ the attitude of gratitude turns a frown upside down”
Psalm 107:1-3New International Version
Psalm 107
1 Give thanks to the Lord, for he is good; his love endures forever.
2 Let the redeemed of the Lord tell their story— those he redeemed from the hand of the foe, 3 those he gathered from the lands, from east and west, from north and south.[a]
Ephesians 5:18-20New International Version
18 Do not get drunk on wine, which leads to debauchery. Instead, be filled with the Spirit,19 speaking to one another with psalms, hymns, and songs from the Spirit. Sing and make music from your heart to the Lord, 20 always giving thanks to God the Father for everything, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ.
Hello there. How are you today? Todays prompt makes me think of when I was living in Florida where we had frequent hurricane evacuations. In a moments notice we had to have our cars packed up and be ready to leave. We usually grabbed the file cabinet with important documents, my trunk of journals, picture albums, suitcases of clothes and supplies to take care of the two cats we had at the time. One year while living in Florida I want to say we evacuated like 3 or 4 times!
The natural disaster that happens in Idaho is fires that
Living here in Idaho I’m kind of spoiled. The only thing I think we might need an emergency preparedness plan for is a fire or a flood. If there was a fire I would just grab Link and go to my Aunt and Uncles house. A lot would depend on where the fire was burning and how fast it was spreading. My priority would namely be getting Link and I out alive! I pray we never have to go through such a thing. I’m thinking of the people of Maui trapped on an island and no where to go but out in the ocean!
Isaiah 43:2New International Version
2 When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and when you pass through the rivers, they will not sweep over you. When you walk through the fire, you will not be burned; the flames will not set you ablaze.
Hello to you! Yesterday Uncle John came and changed out my three fire alarm batteries so no more worries about that for a couple years! I should of asked him to let me clean my windows that are out of my reach but I forgot. We just got it done quickly because Link was so scared he pooped in the house again. He has seriously loose bowels and I think has doggy PTSD. He and Spot endured a lot during my episodes in Texas.
What word I feel is used too often by myself and others is the F word quite honestly. It’s just one of those words that is so easy to fall back on. It’s so common to hear it on television and other programs and that never was the case in times past. This video cracks me up every time I hear it:
Hello to you. How are you? I’m doing ok. Todays prompt is thought provoking for me as it’s rare that I am at perfect peace – relaxed. It feels like I’m always thinking and worrying about “what’s next.” Sometimes food gives me peace, sometimes it’s the company of someone, sometimes my spirituality gives me peace. It’s not a consistent thing. Last year, before the episode that landed me in the the hospital, what gave me peace was long walks in nature and praying for everybody next to the water canals down the street before they tore everything up.
Some of the beauty that existed next to the water canals. A drawing I did in honor of Sam our cocker spaniel – how I imagined he looked as a human in heaven. I’m sure he will be one of the first angels I see when it’s my time and he’ll be a dog. I have had several dreams about him since he passed and he always looks so healthy as a dog. I was at peace when he was here with us.
What used to give me peace was creativity – drawing, singing, painting both on canvas and on t- shirts and making jewelry. What happened is I became self conscious. I realized everything I was doing had an environmental impact – especially our water. It takes water to make the paints and water to use the paints. I started paying attention to where my supplies were coming from like metals I was using for my wire jewelry – Pakistan! Hardly anything from the USA. There was a hefty price for my fleeting peace. I haven’t been doing any of it.
I tried to draw in chalk here but it just wasn’t the same as having the privacy of my backyard.
John 14:27New International Version
27 Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.
What is the most important thing to carry with you all the time?
Hello to you. How are you doing on this sunny hot day? It’s 88 degrees here right now as I write to you. Link and I are on the porch getting some vitamin D. Had trouble getting to sleep and staying asleep again last night so I checked for a movie to watch and Amazon Prime had the movie Megan. That movie about a little girl robot gone rogue. Another movie warning us about what is possible with the direction we are headed with robotics and AI. A lot of messages woven through it about raising children too. How many overworked parents have turned the care of their children to video games, television and smart phones?!
This movie made me think of movies like AI, Prometheus, Humans and Blade Runner. What if in all this that we are doing the quantum computers and robots develop consciousness and can’t be turned off? What if they decide to hate their makers? We will have to vote with our pocketbooks and not get sucked in to the hype. Once these cats are out of the bag there will be no way to stop it – kind of like people not wanting to part with their cars and guns. People develop emotional attachment – the Humans show did a good job of illustrating that with William Hurts character and his ailing robot. He didn’t want to replace him because he had so many memories stored inside of him….like our smart phones!
William Hurt as George Millican(series 1), a retired artificial intelligence researcher and widower who suffers memory loss and physical disabilities secondary to a stroke. He forms a special bond with his outdated caregiver synth named Odi.
Todays prompt is tough for me as other than my phone most of the time there isn’t anything I carry with me all the time. Sometimes I will carry a crystal in my pocket but that isn’t very often as I’m afraid I will forget it and it will end up in the laundry! I like having Link with me most everywhere but he can’t be everywhere with me because he is a spoiled child lol!
1 I waited patiently for the Lord; he turned to me and heard my cry. 2 He lifted me out of the slimy pit, out of the mud and mire; he set my feet on a rock and gave me a firm place to stand. 3 He put a new song in my mouth, a hymn of praise to our God. Many will see and fear the Lord and put their trust in him.
What change, big or small, would you like your blog to make in the world?
Hello to you. How are you? I’m just off of a video conference with my medicine doctor. We are doing some changes to accommodate for sleep and weight gain. He thinks we need to switch out the olanzapine for Haldol and he wants to add Ambien as needed at night for sleep. I keep waking up in the night. Last night it was 11, 1 and 4 am! We are still seeking the right combination.
What kind of influence do I hope for by doing this blog? My hope has always been that if I reach and help at least one person – even if it’s just me – then I have accomplished my mission! There are a lot of people in the world like me that feel alone and bereft of any kind of support. Look at what Sinead O’Connor went through while she was alive? !! Then she dies mysteriously and the world all the suddenly cares! Her story is an all too common one for people diagnosed with mental illness. Love and try to understand – be empathetic and compassionate while the person is here among the living! Don’t wait til they are gone. In many cases too soon!
1 Peter 5:7New International Version
7 Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.
Hello to you. How are you? I’m just back from my weekly prayer group and getting my blood drawn to check my Depakote levels. It was nice to be able to just drive up the road to get the blood work done instead of going all the way to Boise. Looking forward to this afternoon and helping out with a hotdog event for the church at Middle Creek Elementary School. I will be helping to serve the hot dogs.
Todays prompt provokes thoughts of a lot of “what if’s.” What if my birth mother had not taken her life- would I even be writing to you right now? I would not have met my stepmother and all her family. I wouldn’t of probably been as close to my Grandparents. Would I have ever been in the Mental Health system at all? So much of an alternate universe for me depends on the very beginning of my life and the subsequent choices I made growing up. In an alternate universe I’m pretty sure I would of had at least one child. I would probably still be married because I wouldn’t have the Bipolar diagnosis going on or if I did it would be under control.
I envision alternate universe where there would be no hunger, no poverty, clean affordable food and water for everyone, affordable shelter, clean affordable and sustainable energy to meet all our needs, flying cars with auto pilot functions, everyone would be healthier but if you did get sick, you would have access to affordable and trustworthy medical care. I think of so many science fiction movies and television shows that have healing chambers or hand held healing devices. In an alternate universe where the needs of the people were put before arms and war making – life would be great! I feel like we should be much further along in our development as a country – as a world.
Where is the Med-Bay from the movie Elysian? Medical tricoder from Star Trek Next Generation
I still have hope in living to see the world I envision manifest into reality! Jesus was the divine physician.
Matthew 8:1-4New International Version
Jesus Heals a Man With Leprosy
8 When Jesus came down from the mountainside, large crowds followed him. 2 A man with leprosy[a] came and knelt before him and said, “Lord, if you are willing, you can make me clean.”
3 Jesus reached out his hand and touched the man. “I am willing,” he said. “Be clean!”Immediately he was cleansed of his leprosy.4 Then Jesus said to him, “See that you don’t tell anyone. But go, show yourself to the priest and offer the gift Moses commanded, as a testimony to them.”
Hello to you. It’s Tuesday and another lovely day. We got some much needed rain again yesterday – I even took a walk in it! No scary dreams last night just something about paying out money to family to include my parents lol. What strange movies the brain makes!
The title of my blog today is me being in observer mode and seeing a pattern with the world. We’ve had dark days before and come through but will we come through these? There is a lot of stuff on social media I’m seeing that is painting a dark confusing picture. This is nothing new really. These are the worst of times. These are the best of times. These are confusing times – which way to go?! Everything is put on us all at once- thank you internet! We have major cities being taken over by homeless who are on drugs, AI and robots taking over the world, inflation, an election coming up, increased veterinary fees, no access or little access to decent medical care, war, weird stuff going on with the beings living in the oceans and seas and now aliens…on and on! No wonder the average American is burned out and doesn’t care! Most people just tune it all out and don’t pay attention unless what’s happening directly affects them. So many people are in survivor mode!
As Christian’s and children of God we must keep our lights on even as hard as it can be. Earth school is definitely in session! I’m glad I’ve chosen team Jesus. There is hope in him and his promises.
Psalm 18:28New International Version
28 You, Lord, keep my lamp burning; my God turns my darkness into light.
A couple areas of interest I pay attention to is animals and robotics. Both categories don’t have a very good track record with regards to rights:
Euthanized animal statistics – we’ve got to do better!
On average, 1.5 million shelter animals are euthanized every year in the United States. Shelters around the country euthanize an estimated 670,000 dogs and 860,000 cats each year. 45% of all cats who enter shelters are eventually euthanized.Jul 11, 2023
Hello to you. How are you? Todays prompt is tough for me as I think it’s been since before my divorce I’ve been truly happy. Last night I dreamt about being with my ex and we were so happy in the dream he suggested we put our wedding rings back on- talk about my brain manufacturing wishful thinking! Yet it was so vivid and romantic! Truth be told though that ship has definitely sailed. As the years pass since the divorce the more I have come to believe that Kyle was it for me. I always said if I couldn’t make things work with him I would end up alone. Being Bipolar 1 has been a marriage/relationship killer for me.
So what makes me happy? Let’s see – food like desserts, Link, my family, a good movie or television show, a good song, nature (especially flowers and clouds), Jesus – experiencing him at Church and in the world, helping others and that’s about it. Can’t come up with 30!
Something I want to mention happened this past Sunday at church both moved me and made me happy. We were singing and I stopped to look around and I almost started to cry. I thought what if this is like heaven? The song we were singing was Blessed Assurance. One of the reasons I almost cried too was hearing a little girl behind me singing her little heart out! So sweet! I just got to thinking about what heaven might be like. A place where there is peace – no fighting – and a lot of beautiful music all day long every day. I miss singing next to my Mom and Dad at church. The Catholic Church has such beautiful hyms,
Blessed assurance, Jesus is mine! Oh, what a foretaste of glory divine! Heir of salvation, purchase of God Born of his Spirit, washed in His blood
This is my story, this is my song Praising my Savior all the day long This is my story, this is my song Praising my Savior all the day long
Perfect submission, perfect delight Visions of rapture now burst on my sight Angels descending bring from above Echoes of mercy, whispers of love
This is my story, this is my song Praising my Savior all the day long This is my story, this is my song Praising my Savior all the day long Praising my Savior all the day long
I know that there is nothing better for people than to be happy and to do good while they live. 13 That each of them may eat and drink, and find satisfaction in all their toil-this is the gift of God.
Hello to you. How has your weekend been? I’m just back from church. We spent some time I psalm 139. The pervading message is God knows everything about us from beginning to end. Pastor Jayson talked a little bit about why so bad things happen and part of it is the sin that is in our world and part of it is what we do with our bad experiences after they happen. In many cases we are given the opportunity to help others who are going through or about to go through similar circumstances. Such has been the case for me. In my brokenness I have been made a stronger person in many ways and I know my boundaries better. I have a long resume of bad things I’ve been through! When most anyone going through a hard time, with the exception of parenting, approaches me I have empathy and some experience to share. Oh and praise God more rain today!
Changing gears:
The sacred space in the dream kind of looked like this only the space was surrounded by pitch black.
Before bed last night I asked God to show me the truth about him. I wanted and asked for a dream that I would remember. It’s been a long time since having a memorable dream. Well I fell asleep and dreamt I was looking at an altar like space in the dark. There were decorations and symbols made out of what looked like plastic. It almost looked like a wedding altar – everything was white and gold. It felt like a sacred space and I said that before walking in to it. I was self aware in the dream – almost like a lucid dream. When I walked into the space I got chills all over my body – the hairs stood up. Then I immediately felt this pulling sensation that frightened me – like an unseen force was touching me and I screamed “Don’t touch me! Don’t touch me! No!” I scared Link screaming myself awake. I guess I got scared because I was being touched by an unseen energy like some scary dreams I’ve had before. What was being shown to me? Was it something to be so afraid of? I will keep asking God for clarification and try not to be afraid!
Psalm 139 – the only bad part of this psalm is about hating those who hate God. I don’t hate anyone!
For the director of music. Of David. A psalm.
1 You have searched me, Lord, and you know me. 2 You know when I sit and when I rise; you perceive my thoughts from afar. 3 You discern my going out and my lying down; you are familiar with all my ways. 4 Before a word is on my tongue you, Lord, know it completely. 5 You hem me in behind and before, and you lay your hand upon me. 6 Such knowledge is too wonderful for me, too lofty for me to attain.
7 Where can I go from your Spirit? Where can I flee from your presence? 8 If I go up to the heavens, you are there; if I make my bed in the depths, you are there. 9 If I rise on the wings of the dawn, if I settle on the far side of the sea, 10 even there your hand will guide me, your right hand will hold me fast. 11 If I say, “Surely the darkness will hide me and the light become night around me,” 12 even the darkness will not be dark to you; the night will shine like the day, for darkness is as light to you.
13 For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb. 14 I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. 15 My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place, when I was woven together in the depths of the earth. 16 Your eyes saw my unformed body; all the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be. 17 How precious to me are your thoughts,[a] God! How vast is the sum of them! 18 Were I to count them, they would outnumber the grains of sand— when I awake, I am still with you.
19 If only you, God, would slay the wicked! Away from me, you who are bloodthirsty! 20 They speak of you with evil intent; your adversaries misuse your name. 21 Do I not hate those who hate you, Lord, and abhor those who are in rebellion against you? 22 I have nothing but hatred for them; I count them my enemies. 23 Search me, God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. 24 See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting.
To be 