Category: Exploring numeric value of words in English language

3 March 2021 Messengers

by saymber, posted in animals, Exploring numeric value of words in English language, Leading Life by Example, Mental Health, Spirituality and Religion, trust, Veteran Affairs, Writing and blogging

Hello to you how are you? I am pretty good but man am I hungry for spirit food! I have lost track of how many spiritual and positive affirmation recordings I’ve listened to on You Tube the past couple of days. So many different messengers with similar messages all leading to the same font of all that is – God.

I have written in the past that we are all messengers with messages to carry for God. What gets tricky is there are different messengers. Each messenger has their own unique and special way in order to share their message; it may or may not resonate with everyone who receives it. No one person is a messenger for all.

One of my messengers lately has been Joyce Meyer. Her style and approach to delivering daily ways to live with God resonate with me. Not everyone might feel that way. They may have someone else they would rather listen to and learn from.

I am hoping that as I get closer to God I will again be connected like I was before. I hope there will be many messengers and I will never feel alone again.

“cat” in the English Ordinal system equals 24 (thought this was humorous as cats are often seen as half in and half out of the spirit world)

“messengers” in the English Ordinal system equals 124

2 March 2021 Reclaiming Joy

by saymber, posted in Bipolar life, Exploring numeric value of words in English language, Health, Leading Life by Example, Mental Health, Spirituality and Religion, trust, Veteran Affairs, Writing and blogging

Hello to you. How are you doing in your where and when as you visit me here? I have been having a pretty quiet day listening to some people like Joyce Meyer. One of the things she talks about a lot is how we can get robbed of our joy by “the enemy.” I don’t believe in a Satan, but I do believe for every positive force in the world there is an equal and powerful negative one. So if I am happy for whatever reason, there is an equal unhappy “something” waiting in the wings to swing the pendulum of my life.

So what I do when I feel like I am being robbed of my Joy, (my middle name)is I have to evaluate what’s going on in my life and see if there is anything I can do to “right the ship.” Some of it for me has to with something simple as routines. This morning I didn’t follow the routine of getting up, taking my medications and vitamins, making coffee and eating breakfast. Instead I decided to go and get groceries; something I dread doing. Just this minor change in routine affected my entire day and affected my “joy.”

A big part of reclaiming a sense of joy is to decide I am going to do it. I have to make a conscious decision that I want to be happy instead of dreading life. Lately I have been praying to God, the Holy Spirit in particular, for help with this because I know I can’t get out of the depression rut alone. Remembering to be thankful is a big key when I am in the process of reclaiming joy in life. Simple things like saying thank you for a meal, for a particular place and or person in my life. It’s the little things that add up to make a life worth living. It’s little things that are the building blocks to joy.

I am trying to get in the habit of writing everyday as a form of therapy. If there is anything you would like me to write about please let me know in the comments!

“Reclaiming Joy ” in the English Ordinal system equals 141

In case your curious about Joyce Meyer:

28 Feb 2021 New Doors

by saymber, posted in Exploring numeric value of words in English language, Home, Leading Life by Example, Mental Health, Spirituality and Religion, trust, Veteran Affairs, Writing and blogging

Hello to you. How is life treating you as you visit me here? I hope well! When I was thinking of a topic for todays post, New Doors came to mind. If I think about my life these past couple of years, I think of my having to walk through doors. I have had to permanently close doors behind me and get keys to unlock the door ahead of me.

I am not the only one who is having to do this. Just recently my cousin and her husband went through a door I haven’t had to yet and that is the one where you lose a parent. It is a very heavy door to both open, close and lock behind you. They have done it with love and grace. Today when I was over there they were painting the room where his Mother lived and preparing the room to be an apartment for their daughter. I could feel some of the leftover emotions; it’s so hard to move on sometimes but they are doing it!

A prayer I pray at times like these is one my Aunt and I said when they were trying to find a place for my Grandmother to live after they sold her house. It’s a simple prayer but very powerful:

“May the doors that need to open, open. May the doors that need to shut, shut. We pray this in your name, Amen.

That is my prayer for my cousins family, for my family and for anyone reading this today as we move to days of uncertainty ahead. I am hoping that the new doors that open have love, joy and comfort behind them.

“new doors” in the English Ordinal system equals 113 – two selves in a yes, no, may be existence

27 Feb 2021 “Why Now?!”

by saymber, posted in Bipolar life, Exploring numeric value of words in English language, Health, Leading Life by Example, Mental Health, Spirituality and Religion, trust, Veteran Affairs, Writing and blogging

Hello to you. How are you doing today? I am still trying to process news I got yesterday about my Dad. He and my Mom decided that in the near future my Dad will be moved into an assisted care facility. It came as kind of a shock. My initial reaction was selfish asking “Why Now?!!” I have just been through so much and am starting to get some semblance of order in my life and then this news!

“You need to Grow More!” Is the answer I heard to my question just as I was about to write this. What else could I possibly have to learn and or grow about God?! I feel like I barely catch my breath from one “learning opportunity” when another one, usually more difficult in nature, shows up. Sometimes it feels like there is no immediate reason things happen in my life. It isn’t until sometimes much later that the answers come.

Part of what is giving a problem is the thought of having to go see my Dad in the condition he’s in. Ever since my last hospitalization, my relationship with my parents has been strained. We haven’t been keeping in touch much and my Dad’s health has gone downhill really fast. I am unprepared for this stage of my life. I’m not ready to grow up! Sadly I have no choice, every grown child that has parents has to face this phase of their life. Even if I am kicking and screaming along the way it’s still going to happen!

Something that comes to me about this and what I am supposed to be learning is forgiveness. There is a lot I haven’t forgiven. So I am going to do a lot of reaching out on this and pray that God gives me guidance and wisdom on how to face this new stage of life.

“Why Now? You need to grow more!” in the English Ordinal system equals 346 (34 = one 46 = body)

26 Feb 2021 What are you working on ?

by saymber, posted in books, Exploring numeric value of words in English language, Home, Mental Health, Spirituality and Religion, trust, Veteran Affairs, Writing and blogging

Hello how are you today? I am staying warm and dry. We just had a bunch of wind and then snow blow in a few minutes ago!

So I was thinking about a topic for today: “Human life consists of four levels of being – spiritual, mental emotional, and physical. The path of transformationn involves clearing, healing, developing, and integrating all four of these levels” *pg 72 The Path of Transformation How Healing Ourselves Can Change the World by Shakti Gawain. I am currently working primarily on the spiritual part of my life; my relationship with God as I understand them. The closer I get to God the more the other areas of my life seem to want to come into alignment for my greatest good.

I am feeling the hole in my spirit being filled and when I feel “full” of spirit the hunger I feel physically is more balanced. During this process I’ve been going through – namely the divorce- I have gained a lot of weight. To compensate for the emptiness I have been feeling spiritually – the loneliness – I have been eating more than I should.

I was telling one of my friends today that I noticed when I was in a committed relationship with someone, my relationship with God has taken a back seat. Then when I lost the relationship with a tangible being I felt all alone because I hadn’t kept my relationship with God alive. So this time alone is teaching me again that when I keep a strong relationship with God I don’t have to feel alone and indulge in behaviors that aren’t healthy for me.

I hope something here resonates with you. I feel like when I am going through something and share it, I am working with the God of my understanding. I am helping myself and helping someone else too! I hope you have a good day.

“body” in the English Ordinal system equals 46

“spiritual mental emotional and physical ” in the English Ordinal system equals 406


25 Feb 2021 Victory

by saymber, posted in Exploring numeric value of words in English language, Health, Leading Life by Example, Mental Health, Spirituality and Religion, trust, Veteran Affairs, Writing and blogging

Hello to you. How are you? I am doing well as I write to you. Today I had a nice visit with my Aunt and Uncle at their home. We were talking about health and how my Aunt has lost so many friends to cancer. As she talked about this I found myself thinking of positive affirmations and or prayers. The first one that came to me was “I claim victory for my family and friends over cancer.” As I said it I found that my chest got warm! I felt a “glow” inside. There is just a sense of powerlessness when it comes to cancer so it felt good to at least think/feel/say such an empowering phrase!

Lets see what Victory is in the numbers:

“victory” in the English Ordinal system equals 112 – two selves in a light and shadow existence

24 Feb 2021 Manifestation

by saymber, posted in Bipolar life, Exploring numeric value of words in English language, Leading Life by Example, Mental Health, Spirituality and Religion, Veteran Affairs, Writing and blogging

Hello and Good Morning. How are you doing today? I am doing pretty well. I had some cereal and coffee and Link has been out. It’s very cold this morning so the walk will have to wait!

Lately I have been feeling like I am back in “life school.” My Dad told me a long time ago and I believe it, that life is school and we are never out of class. In the past year I have been through some pretty heavy duty courses! I have been going through a divorce, sold a house, bought a house, got my license plates and driver’s license in another state just to name a couple things. The lions share of the course work seems to be about my figuring out how to not be codependent.

It wasn’t until I really started to grieve the lost of my marriage did I realize how codependent of a person I could be. I used to be perfectly fine being alone but that was when I knew I had someone to come back to. Now that I am alone with Link I am having to figure out how to be truly alone. I’m back in school and the class is Manifestation.

I am having to remember I have the power to manifest my reality – I’ve done it before. I did it through writing, art, and various other means to make the reality I wanted to live. When I practiced manifestation before it was trying to bring about the relationship I really wanted. I want to manifest another relationship but before that I want to be healthy in myself. I don’t know if it’s possible to be open for a new relationship and a new life at the same time. I am having to turn to God about this. A couple affirmations from yesterdays reading really stuck out:
*All difficulties between me and ______ are now being healed *The more I love myself the more I love ____.

I love __________and _________ loves me. *Pg 132 Creative Visualization

My temptation was to put my husbands name in the blank spaces but then instead I put God. I want my husband to want me back but his every word and deed is in opposition to that. When you strip away all the possibilities it is God that still remains. When I think of the way things have been the past couple of years, I was married but was spending most of my time with an intangible God. Now is my opportunity to see what it’s like with no one in the way of that relationship. It’s been a rough start but I am coming around to the idea. I want to be complete and whole inside and these thoughts are all part of the manifestation process I’m going through again. The man I want to share my life with must believe in a power greater than himself – God.

So we’ll see what happens in the time that is before me. Lets see what manifestation is in the numbers:

“body” in the English Ordinal system equals 46

“manifestation” in the English Ordinal system equals 146

7 January 2021 Life Purpose

by saymber, posted in Art and Poetry, Bipolar life, drawing, Exploring numeric value of words in English language, Leading Life by Example, Mental Health, photography, Spirituality and Religion, trust, Veteran Affairs, Writing and blogging

Hello to you out there as you visit me here. How are you? I am trying to recover from what life has been throwing at me. I still haven’t heard from my insurance company as to whether or not they plan to total my car or repair it.

Today I had a telephone appointment with my therapist and she has given me a grand assignment. The assignment is to find my life’s purpose and I have no clue how to persue that! It feels like each time I have felt like I have found my life’s purpose, something has happened and or not happened and I am left searching again. I mean I’ve done drawing, writing, painting , photography, experiments, volunteer work . I have really tried a bunch of stuff. I feel like a blank slate now and totally clueless as to what I should be doing now. So to get such an assignment, I feel overwhelmed. Something from my past I have considered going back to is painting. How that worked best was an almost commission type arrangement. Someone would approach me to paint and the money paid would go towards supplies to make the painting.

I wonder what the numbers say about some of this:

“finding a life purpose ” in the English Ordinal system equals 206 (ironically 26 is God, game, lie in the numbers. Also process of light and shadow self with unknown all vices in check but one)

“painting ” in the English Ordinal system equals 90 (ironically spirit is also 90)

“blank slate” in the English Ordinal system equals 97 (weakness is also 97)

“reclaiming your life” in the English Ordinal system equals 202

I’m sure God has some kind of purpose for me I just don’t know what it is right now. I am hoping more human companionship will be part of it. I have found myself chronically lonely!

29 December 2020 Wrecked…Divine Timing

by saymber, posted in Bipolar life, Exploring numeric value of words in English language, Leading Life by Example, Mental Health, Spirituality and Religion, trust, Veteran Affairs, Writing and blogging

Hello to you in your here and now as you visit me here. I haven’t written in a couple of days as I have had a lot going on like getting in to a car wreck on Christmas day! Thankfully the other driver, Link and myself weren’t seriously injured.

For many years I have talked about something called divine timing. When I was with my husband we noticed that if we were going somewhere and there was a delay, there usually was a reason. Sometimes we would stop so he could go to the bathroom and when we got back on the road there would be an accident at the approximate place we would have been.

Well on Christmas day I was supposed to leave my aunt and uncles at 4pm but I decided to leave a few minutes earlier and it was in the few minutes in which I met up with a driver who failed to yield at the stop sign. When I think of those moments it’s like everything is moving in slow motion . I stepped on my brakes so hard hoping it was going to be enough to keep us from getting into an accident,

Currently my car is being tested and evaluated to see if they can repair it which is my hope. I have a rental car but am so reluctant to drive it. Yesterday I didn’t want to get out of bed. I have to drive again otherwise I will be stranded. I was just starting to get my confidence up about driving and then this happens. I find myself asking God why?? Was this just some random occurrence or what does God want to to teach me?

I find myself wanting someone to hold on to going through this. I feel so vulnerable and alone . I have family and friends that have helped me and they text, call and visit but it’s never enough. I miss having someone who supports and loves me all the time. May be this is a a test for for me to try and stand on my own which I haven’t done without being married.

“christmas car accident” in the English Ordinal system equals 191

“spirit” in the English Ordinal system equals 91

16 December 2020 – Alone or Lonely

by saymber, posted in Bipolar life, Exploring numeric value of words in English language, Leading Life by Example, Mental Health, Spirituality and Religion, Veteran Affairs, Writing and blogging

Hello! How are you in your where and when? I am sitting here with Link feeling a little lonely. Someone recently said there is a difference between being alone versus being lonely. I am with Link so therefore I am only lonely whereas if I didn’t have Link to keep me company I would be alone. I am so grateful for Link!

While I am grateful for having Links’s company, I really miss having a human someone to share this new world with. I am moved in to my new home but it doesn’t quite feel like home yet, something and or someone is missing. I guess God is working on this person for me and I just have to be patient.

My Aunt shared with me a powerful affirmation about situations like I’m in – “it’s just for now.” What I am going through is just for now and I need to learn what I can from it before I try and bring someone else into my life. If I a honest with myself, I am impatient and want God to hurry up! I have to have faith someone will come into my life right on time.

“lonely ” in the English Ordinal system equals 83 – racetrack and or eternity of a yes, no, may be existence

“alone ” in the English Ordinal system equals 47 – left brain all vices in check

“It’s just for now” in the English Ordinal system equals 209 – process of light and shadow self unknown “no” existence