Tag: interacting with the Holy Spirit

28 July 2026 Surrender

by saymber, posted in Art and Poetry, Bipolar life, drawing, Health, Mental Health, Spirituality and Religion, Veteran Affairs

Hello there. As I write today is another smoky and hazy day. I haven’t done any walks because of the conditions. After I write this I am going to try and do a 20 min Tai Chi session on YouTube with Don Fiore.

I had a therapy session today and we ended with Alyssa giving me a challenge. She asked me to do a drawing of what surrender looks like for me now. The last big surrender was when I was still married to Ken and lived in Florida. When I turned myself into the care of God, the doors of freedom and recovery flew open.

Here is an abbreviated version of what happened. While stationed in Colorado and then Florida I had started abusing alcohol. One day, in Florida, I met a man who was a broker, can’t remember his name, but he was striking. He was a black man with incredibly blue eyes. He asked me if I had a church home and I said no. He invited me to his mega non- denominational church. I went and the message was about the Holy Spirit being an actual person. The next day I was on my patio drunk and miserable. I simply said “I surrender.” The very next day the Holy Spirit began his work on me. I rode my bike to work and was going to go even with a hangover. As I was getting ready to go I watched the chain on my bike fall off in slow motion. I fixed the chain but was running late now to get to work. I was riding in front of where Ken used to work and all the sudden a Transam about ran me over. I was really shook up now! Had I been there a few seconds earlier I would have been hit!

When I got to work I remembered I had my annual physical exam so I left again. At the appointment there was a questionnaire and alcohol use was one of the questions. I had the courage to be honest. Because I was honest, within a couple days I was in rehab in Maryland! At first Ken and I were mad because we didn’t think I was an alcoholic. Later I realized it was to get the alcohol out of my system to see what was really going on. There is much more to my story of this surrender – let’s just say when the Holy Spirit is in charge nothing is impossible!

I feel like I’ve been doing what God wants me to do right now. My physical conditions prevent me from over doing it like I used to do. What would happen if I surrendered again? Would I be healed so I could be a worthy vessel of the Holy Spirit or how I am now is forever? This drawing is how I view Surrender right now:

Putting to crude drawing what Surrender looks like today

Spin of the World Prayer Wheel:

Let my heart be the vessel of God’s Love.

Let my thoughts be the blossom of God’s Love.

Let my words be the expression of God’s Love.

Let my actions be the fulfillment of God’s Love.

willingness – david ridge

6 March 2021 Spirit

by saymber, posted in Bipolar life, dreams, Exploring numeric value of words in English language, Mental Health, Native American Culture, Spirituality and Religion, trust, Veteran Affairs, Writing and blogging

Hello, how are you? Todays topic arises out of something I watched yesterday – a Pow Wow on Youtube. People participating in the Pow Wow talked about being filled with the Spirit while they danced. I can relate to that feeling. When I used to dance in the backyard in Texas I felt like I was full of the Spirit too. I thought it was interesting that these two are alike in the numbers!

“Jesus Christ” in the English Ordinal system equals 151

“Holy spirit” in the English Ordinal system equals 151

Holy Spirit

Holy Spirit

In Abrahamic religions, the Holy Spirit is an aspect or agent of God, by means of which God communicates with people or acts on them.

Great Spirit (slife.org) – click on this link to read more

The Great Spirit, by way of the spiritual leaders, is looked to for spiritual and cultural guidance on both an individual and community level.

Last year about this time I felt like I was full of what I thought was the Spirit. It turns out it was more like I was full of multiple spirits. I found out first hand that if you don’t have a particular path of spirituality, you can get hijacked by spirits and or energies without a form. I found out the air is just full of spirits with voices. I can remember one day a huge flock of blackbirds landed in a tree out back and I started “translating” what they were saying . Another time a spider and it’s baby landed on my arm and they had a voice. Each part of creation is a fragment of God with a voice. I know that sounds weird but that’s what happened. I think this is part of the reason my husband left me because I just wouldn’t shut up! He couldn’t get any sleep. There was always someone wanting to talk from young to old and all sorts of different languages.

What I had done was to ask God to speak to me in a way that I could understand and it turns out EVERYTHING was God and EVERYTHING had something to say! I guess I was porous and was not only surrounded by spirits but they got inside of me. There are so many sources of energy for which a spirit can obtain energy. In reflection of it all, I don’t know if that was just my mind being delusional or if it was a real phenomenon. Since I have been back on my medication this spirit business hasn’t been happening. Be careful what you ask God!

Some of the spirit business was in my dreams last night I had a vivid dream last night about a haunted house, seeing my dog Sam in his yellow hoodie and then wanting to see my husband who looked like Jesus but not being able to see him. Probably just my mind grappling with what was my reality. Before bed I had seen a preview of a Pureflix movie about Jesus and that must have been a key to unlock the dream I had.

I have been praying for a reestablishing of a relationship between me and specifically the Holy Spirit so we’ll see what God has in mind. May be it’s just dreams for now.