## 23 May 2019 Forgiveness

Forgiveness – https://www.ridingthebeast.com/gematria-calculator/

My interpretation through this system of what forgiveness is.  It is a process within the two sides of ourselves to determine if we will let the harm someone else has caused us be set aside or whether or not we will hold on to it.  Sometimes, for me, it seems like I’ve let something go from the past but something in the present can trigger an old wound.  This has been happening to me recently in my own life.  There are a lot of “broken pieces” in my house as evidence.  I glued some of them together yesterday and made some art out it like I’ve done in the past and posted here.

I deleted all my previous posts because sometimes, without meaning to, you can hurt people with things you write.

Not many people understand this system that came to me around February of last year…..trust issues.  Gematria has been around a long time but the way I interpret it isn’t the same as other people do it.  To consider both the light and shadow aspects of ourselves.  I am split in two in most any way you can be, so this makes sense to me and may make sense to others like me.  This message is for you then.  I feel like God gave me this as a life preserver to try and help me get a grasp on reality.  It is my duty to pass it on….for free.  It doesn’t belong to me, it belongs to the God of my understanding.

Forgiveness” in the English Ordinal system equals 139/13/4/2/1 or 13 divided by 2 (light and shadow of ourselves) = 6.5 = 11/2/1 or 11 divided by 2 = 5.5 = 10/1 or 10 divided by 2 = 5 divided by 2 = 2.5 = 7 divided by 2 = 3.5 = 8/4/2/1  *My name, Jackie, is 39.   To look at this number is one person in a “yes, no, may be” situation and nine for me is nein, nein in German is No.

one three nine” in the English Ordinal system equals 132 – one person in a “yes, no may be” situation yet and now they are in the process of deciding what they will do between the two sides of themselves.

one three two” in the English Ordinal system equals 148 – one person engaged now with their brain, brain is 44 in the numbers in the racetrack or seeming infinity process that is life.

one four eight” in the English Ordinal system equals 143 – one person engaged yet with their brain in the “yes, no, may be” process of forgiveness.

one four three” in the English Ordinal system equals 150 – one person engaged in the five senses, the “sensation” of the unknown aspects of forgiveness.  What will happen if they forgive?  This number is also fifty states and communication in the numbers.

one five zero” in the English Ordinal system equals 140 – one person engaged with their brain in the unknown aspects of forgiveness.

one four zero” in the English Ordinal system equals 158 – one person engaged in the five senses, the “sensation” while living on the racetrack or seeming infinity that is life.  The number eight is the infinity symbol if you draw it.

one five eight” in the English Ordinal system equals 125 – one person engaged in the process of forgiveness and the five senses, the “sensation” and or feeling of what it is like to forgive.

one two five” in the English Ordinal system equals 134 – one person engaged in the “yes, no, may be” aspect along with their brain….”shall I continue?”

one three four” in the English Ordinal system equals 150 – one person engaged in the five senses again, the “sensation” of forgiveness and their are many unknown aspects….variables they can’t control.  It is a cycle.   I forgive but seldom can forget which can be difficult for people who would like to forget the past and I remind them of it.

## 19 Feb 2019 Thank you

Thank you” in the English Ordinal system equals 115/7 divided by 2 = 3.5 = 8/4/2/1

one one five” in the English Ordinal system equals 110/2/1

https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/thanks – I was curious about the origins of this phrase.  Couldn’t find a whole lot!

A phrase that I say quite often is thank you.  A phrase I say to someone because I want them to know I appreciate them be they a human being or any other form of life.  A phrase I express to the God of my understanding for the food I eat, having a place to live, clothes on my back, water to drink, having my health and all the other aspects that make up my simple life.

Just two words….”thank you.”

It’s sometimes easy to lose sight of what we have and focus on what we don’t have.  There are days it’s easier for me to complain, pass judgement on others and make myself miserable.  This is when is a good time to give thanks.  To pull out a mental gratitude list and find that all the positives in my life far outweigh the negatives.

“The Attitude of Gratitude”

the attitude of gratitude” in the English Ordinal system equals 259/16/7 divided by 2 = 3.5 = 8/4/2/1 or 16/8/4/2/1 (the straight path I see is seeing the world in one way or the other without discernment or questioning.)

(7 divided by 2, for me, a world divided into two parts within a person and outside of a person.  Seeing the world with both the light and shadow sides of ourselves. When 8 arrives, for me, I see the arrival of God (26) which gradually brings you back to 1 or yourself.  Not everyone believes in the same God.  Not everyone has the same concept of God.  Not everyone even believes in God.  This is just how I interpret these values for myself.  How I perceive “God” isn’t even like my family or most people I know.  I see God as the energy of all creation – the earth, all the planets and all known existence.  That’s just me and I don’t expect anyone also to adopt this concept.  I like to show, via this system, the messages and patterns that I see.  This system is a way for me to find some semblance of trust in a system I am finding so much fault with these days.)

two five nine” in the English Ordinal system equals 142

gratitude” in the English Ordinal system equals 105/6/3 cycle

one zero five” in the English Ordinal system equals 140

world” in the English Ordinal system equals 72/9 divided by 2 = 4.5 = 9 cycle

seven two” in the English Ordinal system equals 123