5 March 2021 “Get up for your family!”

Hello, how are you doing today? I hope you are well. I just got done talking with one of my old neighbors about various things to include my having trouble getting up some mornings. She said, “Get up for your family!” I hadn’t thought about it that way before as the only family I have in the house is Link! I have extended family in the area like my Aunt, Uncle, three cousins and their children. I have never thought about having the reason I should get up out of bed be for them!

These problems I have been having in the morning started ever since my husband left me. When we were together I practically jumped out of bed in the morning! I am beginning to think he was my muse about life. It was his love and our relationship that was the inspiration of what happened in my day. I got up to make us breakfast and we got up to walk the dogs together.

Sometimes I set my husband above the place of God in my life.

Now that I am alone, I am realizing the one I am getting up for isn’t any tangible being….it’s the Holy Spirit….it’s God. After all it was God that helped me write the blogs I wrote in the past, draw the pictures, do the chalk drawings and take the photographs . It was the invisible force of God that would give me a subtle nudge one way or another to do some of the most creative things I have done. I kind of forgot to give the glory to God and wasn’t specific about it. I have been praying for God to “show me” again, to re-establish the relationship we had together before everything feel apart. Show me in ways I can understand why I need to get up in the morning – to start my day. I want to be an instrument for God.

I will keep working on getting up for my family and the head of my family is God. God can be where my family cannot.

get up for your God” in the English Ordinal system equals 213 (month and day I was born!)(light and shadow process, for one, yes, no, may be)

get up for your family” in the English Ordinal system equals 253 (light and shadow process, all senses, yes, no may be existence)

4 March 2021 Stranger

Hello and good afternoon to you. How are you? I hope you are well. I have been listening to a lot of Joyce Meyer audio sermons on You Tube to try and help myself get stronger in my faith. Hearing her strong messages of “YOU CAN” instead of “YOU CAN’T” has been helping me fight some internal battles. I decided as part of helping myself was to get into the word myself. One of my favorite books is Matthew. In particular this passage that talks about how to treat people you don’t know:

Matthew 25:31-40New International Version

The Sheep and the Goats

31 “When the Son of Man comes in his glory, and all the angels with him, he will sit on his glorious throne. 32 All the nations will be gathered before him, and he will separate the people one from another as a shepherd separates the sheep from the goats. 33 He will put the sheep on his right and the goats on his left.

34 “Then the King will say to those on his right, ‘Come, you who are blessed by my Father; take your inheritance, the kingdom prepared for you since the creation of the world. 35 For I was hungry and you gave me something to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink, I was a stranger and you invited me in, 36 I needed clothes and you clothed me, I was sick and you looked after me, I was in prison and you came to visit me.’

37 “Then the righteous will answer him, ‘Lord, when did we see you hungry and feed you, or thirsty and give you something to drink? 38 When did we see you a stranger and invite you in, or needing clothes and clothe you? 39 When did we see you sick or in prison and go to visit you?’

40 “The King will reply, ‘Truly I tell you, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers and sisters of mine, you did for me.

I was a stranger and you invited me in” in the English T system equals 359 – (yes, no, may be all senses in a no existence)

When I am reading this, I began to think of my moving from Texas here to Idaho. I have been the stranger. I like this verse about this too:

Hebrews 13 NIV

13 Keep on loving one another as brothers and sisters. Do not forget to show hospitality to strangers, for by so doing some people have shown hospitality to angels without knowing it.

I’m curious to see what this comes out to in the numbers:

Lord” in the English Ordinal system equals 49

Do not forget to show hospitality to strangers, for by so doing some people have shown hospitality to angels without knowing it.” in the English Ordinal system equals 1419

Sometimes it’s hard to feel like anything more than a stranger when you move to a completely new location and don’t know anyone. I am hoping eventually my feeling like a stranger in my neighborhood will pass and I will get to know my neighbors.

3 March 2021 Messengers

Hello to you how are you? I am pretty good but man am I hungry for spirit food! I have lost track of how many spiritual and positive affirmation recordings I’ve listened to on You Tube the past couple of days. So many different messengers with similar messages all leading to the same font of all that is – God.

I have written in the past that we are all messengers with messages to carry for God. What gets tricky is there are different messengers. Each messenger has their own unique and special way in order to share their message; it may or may not resonate with everyone who receives it. No one person is a messenger for all.

One of my messengers lately has been Joyce Meyer. Her style and approach to delivering daily ways to live with God resonate with me. Not everyone might feel that way. They may have someone else they would rather listen to and learn from.

I am hoping that as I get closer to God I will again be connected like I was before. I hope there will be many messengers and I will never feel alone again.

cat” in the English Ordinal system equals 24 (thought this was humorous as cats are often seen as half in and half out of the spirit world)

messengers” in the English Ordinal system equals 124

2 March 2021 Reclaiming Joy

Hello to you. How are you doing in your where and when as you visit me here? I have been having a pretty quiet day listening to some people like Joyce Meyer. One of the things she talks about a lot is how we can get robbed of our joy by “the enemy.” I don’t believe in a Satan, but I do believe for every positive force in the world there is an equal and powerful negative one. So if I am happy for whatever reason, there is an equal unhappy “something” waiting in the wings to swing the pendulum of my life.

So what I do when I feel like I am being robbed of my Joy, (my middle name)is I have to evaluate what’s going on in my life and see if there is anything I can do to “right the ship.” Some of it for me has to with something simple as routines. This morning I didn’t follow the routine of getting up, taking my medications and vitamins, making coffee and eating breakfast. Instead I decided to go and get groceries; something I dread doing. Just this minor change in routine affected my entire day and affected my “joy.”

A big part of reclaiming a sense of joy is to decide I am going to do it. I have to make a conscious decision that I want to be happy instead of dreading life. Lately I have been praying to God, the Holy Spirit in particular, for help with this because I know I can’t get out of the depression rut alone. Remembering to be thankful is a big key when I am in the process of reclaiming joy in life. Simple things like saying thank you for a meal, for a particular place and or person in my life. It’s the little things that add up to make a life worth living. It’s little things that are the building blocks to joy.

I am trying to get in the habit of writing everyday as a form of therapy. If there is anything you would like me to write about please let me know in the comments!

Reclaiming Joy ” in the English Ordinal system equals 141

In case your curious about Joyce Meyer:

1 March 2021 Where Two or Three are Gathered….

Hello to you. How are you doing today? I am doing pretty good. My Aunt and I went over to a new friends house today to learn how to crochet. This woman lives alone with her little dog named Grace and like me welcomes having someone besides her own company to visit with. This came to mind thinking about our gathering together:

Matthew 18:20 – For where two or three are gathered together in my name, there am I in the midst of them.

Something else I figured out about this type of gathering what I call a power pyramid. There is just something powerful about having a triangle formation. May be it is because God is “in there.” I hadn’t been crocheting for quite some time but sitting in that power pyramid I felt I could! It just felt good!

I feel like we are social beings and called to community with each other. God wants to be “in there” right in the middle! I am trying to figure out how I fit into the community I find myself in now. One of the things that holds me back the most from truly immersing myself is driving. For most gatherings you have to drive somewhere to participate. I am going to have to pray about this obstacle and see what paths God opens up for me.

28 Feb 2021 New Doors

Hello to you. How is life treating you as you visit me here? I hope well! When I was thinking of a topic for todays post, New Doors came to mind. If I think about my life these past couple of years, I think of my having to walk through doors. I have had to permanently close doors behind me and get keys to unlock the door ahead of me.

I am not the only one who is having to do this. Just recently my cousin and her husband went through a door I haven’t had to yet and that is the one where you lose a parent. It is a very heavy door to both open, close and lock behind you. They have done it with love and grace. Today when I was over there they were painting the room where his Mother lived and preparing the room to be an apartment for their daughter. I could feel some of the leftover emotions; it’s so hard to move on sometimes but they are doing it!

A prayer I pray at times like these is one my Aunt and I said when they were trying to find a place for my Grandmother to live after they sold her house. It’s a simple prayer but very powerful:

“May the doors that need to open, open. May the doors that need to shut, shut. We pray this in your name, Amen.

That is my prayer for my cousins family, for my family and for anyone reading this today as we move to days of uncertainty ahead. I am hoping that the new doors that open have love, joy and comfort behind them.

new doors” in the English Ordinal system equals 113 – two selves in a yes, no, may be existence

27 Feb 2021 “Why Now?!”

Hello to you. How are you doing today? I am still trying to process news I got yesterday about my Dad. He and my Mom decided that in the near future my Dad will be moved into an assisted care facility. It came as kind of a shock. My initial reaction was selfish asking “Why Now?!!” I have just been through so much and am starting to get some semblance of order in my life and then this news!

“You need to Grow More!” Is the answer I heard to my question just as I was about to write this. What else could I possibly have to learn and or grow about God?! I feel like I barely catch my breath from one “learning opportunity” when another one, usually more difficult in nature, shows up. Sometimes it feels like there is no immediate reason things happen in my life. It isn’t until sometimes much later that the answers come.

Part of what is giving a problem is the thought of having to go see my Dad in the condition he’s in. Ever since my last hospitalization, my relationship with my parents has been strained. We haven’t been keeping in touch much and my Dad’s health has gone downhill really fast. I am unprepared for this stage of my life. I’m not ready to grow up! Sadly I have no choice, every grown child that has parents has to face this phase of their life. Even if I am kicking and screaming along the way it’s still going to happen!

Something that comes to me about this and what I am supposed to be learning is forgiveness. There is a lot I haven’t forgiven. So I am going to do a lot of reaching out on this and pray that God gives me guidance and wisdom on how to face this new stage of life.

Why Now? You need to grow more!” in the English Ordinal system equals 346 (34 = one 46 = body)

26 Feb 2021 What are you working on ?

Hello how are you today? I am staying warm and dry. We just had a bunch of wind and then snow blow in a few minutes ago!

So I was thinking about a topic for today: “Human life consists of four levels of being – spiritual, mental emotional, and physical. The path of transformationn involves clearing, healing, developing, and integrating all four of these levels” *pg 72 The Path of Transformation How Healing Ourselves Can Change the World by Shakti Gawain. I am currently working primarily on the spiritual part of my life; my relationship with God as I understand them. The closer I get to God the more the other areas of my life seem to want to come into alignment for my greatest good.

I am feeling the hole in my spirit being filled and when I feel “full” of spirit the hunger I feel physically is more balanced. During this process I’ve been going through – namely the divorce- I have gained a lot of weight. To compensate for the emptiness I have been feeling spiritually – the loneliness – I have been eating more than I should.

I was telling one of my friends today that I noticed when I was in a committed relationship with someone, my relationship with God has taken a back seat. Then when I lost the relationship with a tangible being I felt all alone because I hadn’t kept my relationship with God alive. So this time alone is teaching me again that when I keep a strong relationship with God I don’t have to feel alone and indulge in behaviors that aren’t healthy for me.

I hope something here resonates with you. I feel like when I am going through something and share it, I am working with the God of my understanding. I am helping myself and helping someone else too! I hope you have a good day.

body” in the English Ordinal system equals 46

spiritual mental emotional and physical ” in the English Ordinal system equals 406


25 Feb 2021 Victory

Hello to you. How are you? I am doing well as I write to you. Today I had a nice visit with my Aunt and Uncle at their home. We were talking about health and how my Aunt has lost so many friends to cancer. As she talked about this I found myself thinking of positive affirmations and or prayers. The first one that came to me was “I claim victory for my family and friends over cancer.” As I said it I found that my chest got warm! I felt a “glow” inside. There is just a sense of powerlessness when it comes to cancer so it felt good to at least think/feel/say such an empowering phrase!

Lets see what Victory is in the numbers:

victory” in the English Ordinal system equals 112 – two selves in a light and shadow existence

24 Feb 2021 Manifestation

Hello and Good Morning. How are you doing today? I am doing pretty well. I had some cereal and coffee and Link has been out. It’s very cold this morning so the walk will have to wait!

Lately I have been feeling like I am back in “life school.” My Dad told me a long time ago and I believe it, that life is school and we are never out of class. In the past year I have been through some pretty heavy duty courses! I have been going through a divorce, sold a house, bought a house, got my license plates and driver’s license in another state just to name a couple things. The lions share of the course work seems to be about my figuring out how to not be codependent.

It wasn’t until I really started to grieve the lost of my marriage did I realize how codependent of a person I could be. I used to be perfectly fine being alone but that was when I knew I had someone to come back to. Now that I am alone with Link I am having to figure out how to be truly alone. I’m back in school and the class is Manifestation.

I am having to remember I have the power to manifest my reality – I’ve done it before. I did it through writing, art, and various other means to make the reality I wanted to live. When I practiced manifestation before it was trying to bring about the relationship I really wanted. I want to manifest another relationship but before that I want to be healthy in myself. I don’t know if it’s possible to be open for a new relationship and a new life at the same time. I am having to turn to God about this. A couple affirmations from yesterdays reading really stuck out:
*All difficulties between me and ______ are now being healed *The more I love myself the more I love ____.

I love __________and _________ loves me. *Pg 132 Creative Visualization

My temptation was to put my husbands name in the blank spaces but then instead I put God. I want my husband to want me back but his every word and deed is in opposition to that. When you strip away all the possibilities it is God that still remains. When I think of the way things have been the past couple of years, I was married but was spending most of my time with an intangible God. Now is my opportunity to see what it’s like with no one in the way of that relationship. It’s been a rough start but I am coming around to the idea. I want to be complete and whole inside and these thoughts are all part of the manifestation process I’m going through again. The man I want to share my life with must believe in a power greater than himself – God.

So we’ll see what happens in the time that is before me. Lets see what manifestation is in the numbers:

body” in the English Ordinal system equals 46

manifestation” in the English Ordinal system equals 146