25 Feb 2018 Thumbs Up or Thumbs Down – Today is Sunday

Good morning!

I made a little video this morning to make a point about something.  The funny things is, the point didn’t come to me right as I was doing this!  I came to the realization when I went to share the video with family and friends on Facebook that my options for acknowledging the content of the video didn’t seem appropriate – namely the “Like” button.  It hit me that when I click Like on things that I don’t, that I’m giving my personal power and energy to manifest more of what I would actually like to see, hear and feel less of in this world!  So if you decide to watch this, and what I have to say resonates with what you feel about the subject, please feel free to give it a thumbs down!  I am hoping you will.   I noticed the view counter for You Tube is counting every time I look at the video from another location so the current number of 8 is just me.

I do not collect an income or royalties from blogging, I do it for me, so I do not consider myself “working” at the moment.

Good ol’ Siskel and Ebert remind me of a dream I had many years ago, after Gene Siskel died in 1999, about seeing a face in a flowing desert of red sand and that was all there was left to the world.  I took a look at the numeric value of Thumbs Down and it actually can be a positive thing.  Just my opinion though.

It was widely known for the “thumbs up/thumbs down” review summaries given during Siskel’s and Ebert’s tenures (this was dropped after Ebert ended his association with the program, as the phrase “Two Thumbs Up” is a trademark held by the Siskel and Ebert families).

At the Movies (U.S. TV series) – Wikipedia

25 Feb 2018 Drawing I did yesterday. A bird came and visited me and was very vocal.


18 Feb 2018 Who are we now?

Hello to you.  It’s 11:45 am on this cool, gray Sunday.  I just wanted to share a positive word.  I feel like I am discovering a way to be useful in this world, and it’s not an easy process but a process just the same – seeking and finding the positive things in people, places and things.   I used to be really good at this – when I was a child of course.  Well thankfully, inside, I still feel my inner child very much alive!  The part of me that our Sam taught me to hold on to – there are no strangers in this world, just family you haven’t met yet.  Not just friends, FAMILY.  Why do I say that?  With my understanding of God as energy.   If everything is energy and everything is God then that makes us all – every single form of life know and unknown – family!

Anyhew.   In my meditation this morning, the message that came forth was about how the past can hang and or trip us up to getting to where we want to go.  I have shared this before here but I will share it again:  “It’s not who we were in the past, it’s who we are now.”  The God of my understanding doesn’t care about the past because Time is our device.  The God of my understanding doesn’t care about what mistakes we’ve made in the past only if we don’t learn from them and intentionally keep repeating them.  If we don’t even try to make amends to those we’ve wronged to include ourselves.

As I sat outside doing this drawing and meditation a thought occurred to me for places we could start making amends – prisons of all kinds, nursing homes, mental health facilities, rehabilitation centers and our churches.  All the places for humans, animals and plants that could be considered cages.  Unconditional love and forgiveness has not been taught or learned by many.  What if we were to work together starting in a place we all share….the heart?  Just a thought…an idea with a positive intention and or motive.


DSC_0549 18 Feb 2018 Jackie Wygant morning meditation Alvarado TX

14 Feb 2018 Every day

Hello to you this day, where and when you are as you visit me here.  It’s Valentines Day.  Yesterday was my 50th birthday – almost a Valentines baby from what they tell me lol.  The heart and what it means both physically and symbolically has always been important to me – what it is the heart does.  It works every single day for our bodies to remind us we are alive….that is if we actually use it for more than just living.  There is a difference between living and being alive.  There are those who know what I mean.  You see them all the time around you. Those people who laugh too loud, hug too hard, make jokes all the time to try to get you to smile or laugh, go out of their way to make you something you didn’t expect just because they care about you….earth angels.

Valentines Day, like many “Hallmark” holidays has become highly commercialized and one of the biggest things they try to sell us is chocolate.  Well, in the past couple of years I have come to look at chocolate differently than I used to.  What is the process to actually get the chocolate?  Who farms the beans to make the chocolate?  I found out some companies buy the beans, like for coffee, from people who are in the practice of slavery.  Slavery of men, women and children for something that tastes so wonderful.  I won’t belabor the point.  If you research on your own, which I recommend, there is plenty of information about this: http://www.slavefreechocolate.org/

The commercialization of holidays is not just the corporations fault.  It is ours too.  Increasingly we are spending more time on acquiring things than appreciating what we already have.  In the case of Valentines Day….the significant other we have married, live with, are dating….I hope…love.

Relationships are like a garden to me.  If you don’t tend to them every single day, and a farmer or gardener will tell you this too, the garden will not do as well and eventually just become inedible “weeds” (I don’t consider all plants to be weeds, I love dandelions for example and eat them for medicinal purposes).

Every single day is the day to take the time for what is most important in this life, what you “love” the most (thank you Richard Gordon and Carol Lee of Quantum Touch Energy Healing).  Don’t wait for holidays and special occasions to love.  Showering those in your world with material possessions and distractions isn’t entirely the way to do that.   Kyle and I “don’t do Valentines Day” not because we don’t appreciate the sentiment of the day, we have Valentines Day every day, birthdays every day, Christmas every day and certainly, my favorite, Thanksgiving every day.  Every day we live is a gift and so are all those we are blessed to share this life with.  God made the animals and God made us (lovely books at The Country Store I was looking at yesterday when we visited there).

My gift, for my birthday, was going to such a wonderful store run by people who love each other and bake bread and provide organic foods and just what you need.  They don’t have a lot of things, they have good things there that are good for you.  When I go in there I am overwhelmed in a positive way unlike most retail stores.  My Grandma and Grandpa Schmidt used to visit the Mennonite people all the time to get flour and other things they needed especially during the times they were raising 6 boys and times were difficult.  There can be such a thing as too many choices….too much.  Make it well, make it last and above all treat those who make it how you would want to be treated….every day.

14 Feb 2018 – wonderful quote I found the other day from Steve that resonated with me.

13 Feb 2018 Jackie Wygant drawing 50 Alvarado TX

13 Feb 2018 Seek First to Understand

20 April 2017 – I don’t know why but I put these things together. The Prayer of St. Francis is one of my very favorites.

Hello just a quick post.  I wanted to share some thoughts that came to me today.  I had been feeling anxious and my brain was running pretty fast and I’m tired from not sleeping so well the past couple of nights.  So I grabbed my chalks, even though it is cold out (if you dress appropriately the cold isn’t so bad), and these thoughts came to me….specifically the words of one of my favorite prayers.  The part about seeking to understand versus always being understood specifically.  Most of my life I’ve tried to do the understanding part but it’s not always easy.  Sometimes you want others to “get you” to understand why you are the way you are and you can’t tell them the whole story of why because they have their own problems too.   It’s hard to focus on other people’s “stuff” when while they are talking, you are thinking about your own self the whole time….”what’s in this for me?  why should I care?”  It’s hard to be selfless and empathetic and or caring and also take care of, even “protect” yourself from others stuff.  This is where compromise, respect, treating others like you would want to be treated and healthy boundaries and all that good stuff comes into play.

Anyhew – hope something here resonates.  One person can’t fix a mess as big as the one we’ve got here on Earth.  I know I didn’t make all this mess but I did have my part in all of it.  We each have a part in the mess and have to find our way of working towards a loving, peaceful, non-violent solution to it.  It didn’t happen overnight!  The phrase that keeps coming to me, “Trust the Process.”  For me that means having faith in myself and the God of my understanding that there is a plan in all of this.

26 Oct 2017 A Simple Prayer St Francis that belong to Kyles Grandma Pat Hultgren

13 Feb 2018 – what a birthday gift to be able to do this every day. What is Time for?  To make money or make a meaningful life?  What is money without a meaningful life?  We’ve created quite the paradox!


10 Feb 2018 Houses and Becoming

Hello again. It’s cold and getting colder by the minute as I write. Today will be an inside day I think! This morning I finished working on the blanket I started working on back in January of last year! It’s a corner to corner pattern that my friend Erin and Red Heart Yarn taught me how to do and it’s pretty much the only one I use now lol.

10 Feb 2018 – finished my blanket this morning! Thinking I have a friend I may be gifting it to.

I did get out for a quick chalk meditation this morning and some interesting stuff came forward. For many, what I am sharing with you may not resonate with your belief systems, culture, morals or value system…may seem strange even. You may not agree with what is here and that is perfectly fine! Everyone has a comfort zone….a “warm blanket” if you will. I am just passing on what came to me with no expectation from you the reader.

10 Feb 2018 My morning chalk meditation messages

A phrase kept popping into my head this morning, “Old God’s in New Houses.” That is from where this meditation stems from – the train of thought. It may seem something like out of horror films or repulsive but a pallative way to consider this information would be the simple phrase at the end of it all, “I feel, I think, therefore I am, I become.” Who are you? Did you know once a long time ago but the world beat and or numbed it out of you? I am hoping to empower you to be who God brought you here to be. To remember who you are and if you can’t and want to, do the work here in this shared dream this planet-sized school we are all in, and find out!

10 Feb 2018 My notes about chalk meditation this morning.

From my own personal experiences, and what I’ve observed in the world, this is happening. Have you ever met someone and felt like you met them before? What was it about them?  A look, a gesture, a walk, a way of speaking, something they said, sharing sentences…a smell?  Some of this is just nature of course but I believe there is more to it than that.  Perhaps on some level you have or did. If you think about the entire cycle of life, death and new life why would that not be possible? What if the energy all around us, capable of making an entire planet full of life, not have such a system? Recycling? Repurposing? What is energy? To me? God! What is God? Life, death and new life. How do we get there? It’s a process and it takes time but it is eternal.

Aaliyah – Miss You

Source Internet – I LOVE this quote from Black Elk

10 Feb 2018 We Lead By Our Example

Hello to you.  Last night Kyle and I watched the Olympics Opening Ceremonies and I was brought to tears by the beauty of what I saw and also very disappointed in my country.  My favorite moments included watching The Map to The Stars – it brought tears to my eyes.  It has been so refreshing for Kyle and I to see new faces, hear new stories and learn about a culture that is so intricately woven into our own.  Kyle even recognized the Cardinal Directions.    He used to buy and read Manga and he introduced me to anime which we both now really enjoy.

http://ecumenicalbuddhism.blogspot.com/2010/02/four-symbols-five-cardinal-directions.html – excerpt, recommend if this peaks your curiosity you read this.

The Four Symbols (Chinese: 四象; pinyin: Sì Xiàng) are four mythological creatures in the Chinese constellations. They are:

  • Azure Dragon of the East (青龍)
  • Vermillion Bird of the South (朱雀)
  • White Tiger of the West (白虎)
  • Black Tortoise of the North (玄武)

Each one of them represents a direction and a season of the year, and each has its own individual characteristics and origins. They have been portrayed in many historical Chinese and Korean myths and fiction, and also appear in many modern Japanese comic books and animation.


9 Feb 2018 – My thoughts lead me to the Akashic records. One of my favorite vampire flicks, Queen of the Damned starred Aaliyah who played Akasha…the Mother of all vamps.

The Box, Map to the Stars reference makes sense to me now as it was part of the Opening Ceremonies for the Winter Games to include a man who sat in a box and I was disappointed in his behavior, #2 Mike Pence.  Here was an opportunity for launching a path to peace and our country made choices to the contrary.  This is what conditional love looks like to me.   Progress not perfection though, at least all the “players” were there and willing to be in the same physical vicinity as one another.   It’s not the “body” that matters, it’s the behavior of the energy wearing the body that does.  Actions speak louder than words.    If you want peace in this world, you are going to have to work a lot harder on your behavior to get it.  It’s about behavior when it comes to the quality of our character not our physical appearance or presence.

13 Oct 2016 – It looks like for this particular game, the white piece defeated another white piece….

 Kim Jong-un’s sister Kim Yo-jong showed great courage to me, a woman, trying to lead by her example and at least try to change the course of history.  When I watched her, I had to smile.  She strikes me as someone with a wicked sense of humor.  I know there are “violations” and “wrongs” that have happened but America has lead by it’s example with blood on the streets every day.  How many mass shootings in just these few days of the year in this country.  We are in no position to judge anyone.

Leadership is solving problems. The day soldiers stop bringing you their problems is the day you have stopped leading them. They have either lost confidence that you can help or concluded you do not care. Either case is a failure of leadership.


Winter Olympics 2018: Pence skips dinner with N Koreans

US Vice-President Pence (R) was seated near Kim Jong-un's sister Kim Yo-jong (L) at the opening ceremonyImage copyright AFP/Getty Images
Image caption Kim Jong-un’s sister Kim Yo-jong was seated in the row behind US Vice-President Mike Pence at the opening ceremony

US Vice-President Mike Pence has skipped a dinner at which he was due to share a table with North Korea’s ceremonial head of state Kim Yong-nam.

Mr Pence briefly encountered Mr Kim but they tried to avoid directly facing each other, Yonhap news agency reports.

Later South Korean President Moon Jae-in shook hands with North Korean leader Kim Jong-un’s sister, Kim Yo-jong, at the Winter Olympics opening ceremony.

The Games are taking place amid tension over North Korea’s nuclear programme.

Mr Yong-nam did briefly meet with United Nations Secretary-General Antonio Guterres at the dinner. According to a UN spokesperson, Mr Guterres reiterated a hope for “peaceful denuclearisation” on the peninsula.

What happened at the dinner?

Mr Pence and Kim Yong-nam were being hosted by President Moon before the opening ceremony in Pyeongchang.

But the US vice-president left the reception venue after five minutes, South Korea’s Yonhap said.

While Mr Moon and Japanese Prime Minister Shinzo Abe both shook hands with Mr Kim, Mr Pence did not, South Korean officials said.

Media playback is unsupported on your device

What we’ve seen of Kim Yo-jong from North Korean media

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Media captionWhat we’ve seen of Kim Yo-jong from North Korean media

At the event Mr Moon said he hoped the Winter Olympics would be remembered as the “day peace began”. He is due to meet the North Korean delegation for talks on Saturday according to Yonhap.

At the opening ceremony, Mr Pence, Kim Yo-jong and Kim Yong-nam were seated in close proximity to each other.

Mr Pence has brought to South Korea as a guest Fred Warmbier, the father of a young American who died after being released from prison in North Korea.

Who is Kim Yo-jong?

The highest profile member of the North Korean delegation to the Games, she is the first immediate member of the North’s ruling family to visit the South since the 1950-1953 Korean war.

Ms Kim, who is said to be very close to her brother, was promoted to the North’s powerful politburo last year.

She is on a US sanctions list over alleged links to human rights abuses in North Korea.

Ms Kim is thought to be about 30 years old, around four years younger than her brother.

Ms Kim (C) shook hands with Mr Moon at the opening ceremonyImage copyright Reuters
Image caption North Korea’s Ms Kim shook hands with South Korea’s Mr Moon at the opening ceremony

Her visit is being seen as a sign that Kim Jong-un is serious about improving ties with the South, the BBC’s South Korea correspondent Laura Bicker reports.

She adds that some are also speculating that Ms Kim might be bringing a message from her brother.

How will the Koreas compete at the Games?

Athletes from both North and South Korea marched under one flag at the opening ceremony, bringing spectators to their feet.

They are also fielding a joint women’s ice hockey team.

Alongside 22 athletes, Pyongyang has sent more than 400 delegates to the Games, including a team of cheerleaders and an orchestra.

North and South Korean athletes marched under one flag at the opening ceremonyImage copyright AFP/Getty
Image caption North and South Korean athletes marched under one flag at the opening ceremony

However the opening ceremony was not shown on North Korean state TV, which was broadcasting patriotic songs and slogans celebrating industry and the armed forces.

Have relations warmed?

Experts have cautioned that the current burst of sports diplomacy does not put an end to underlying regional tensions.

On Thursday North Korea had held a military parade that was originally scheduled for April but was brought forward.

Nevertheless, 2018 has got the countries off on an improved footing.

Kim Jong-un surprised many in his televised new-year speech, when – amid threats against the US – he expressed support for the Winter Olympics and a wish to “melt the frozen North-South relations”.

The South had already said the North would be welcome to send a delegation, but few believed it would happen.

Later in January, a communications hotline was reinstated between the two countries, whose authorities then met for the first high-level talks in two years.

The Korean peninsula has been divided since the 1950-53 war and the two sides have never signed a peace treaty.

9 Feb 2018 Afternoon chalk (Nefertiti, Akashic Records, Capitalism and Addiction)

Hello to you.  One more post for today.  There has been a steady flow of “stuff” today but I can tell my brain needs a break lol….a lot of processing going on.  My afternoon meditation, the one I’m sharing, lead me on a very interesting path.  Remember, I just draw what comes regardless of anything “known,” published, printed etc.  A friend of ours mentioned a tizzy that happened about an interpretation done of what Queen Nefertiti looked like – “she looks too white” everyone is saying.  Well people look around.  There are all colors of the rainbow when it comes to the human suites we are wearing.  We need to remember our bodies are just a suite of clothes to cover thousands of microbes, bacteria and countless other forms of life we don’t even know about….the “seen” and “unseen” mucking around under our drawers.  GET OVER THE SUITE!  Our eyes can deceive even our hearts.

Anyhew, I won’t belabor this as I’d just be wasting my energy.  Some people are just set in their ways and there is no reasoning with them.  You just have to love them through this process we are all going through.  The phrase “Trust the Process” keeps coming to me.  I love and trust the God of my understanding and will do just that….have faith and not lose hope.


Ancient Egypt: Mummy of Queen Nefertiti Brought to Life With Controversial Fair Skin in 3-D Scan

The face of Queen Nefertiti, who may have been King Tutankhamun’s biological mother, will be revealed on the Travel Channel’s Expedition Unknown, which airs Wednesday night. The face is the result of the latest 3-D imaging technology that used the mummy’s facial structure to bring the 3,400-year-old queen to life, but it’s the sculpture’s skin color, not cheekbones, that has raised the most controversy.

In order to create the bust of the ancient queen, a team of scientists at the University of Bristol in England digitally mapped the face of a mummy known as “The Younger Lady.” The mummy was found in 1898 and is believed to be of Queen Nefertiti, but this was never proven. The mummy’s face was digitally mapped to make an accurate facial construction for the bust. Then, paleoartist Elisabeth Daynes recreated the Queen’s face on the bust, a painstaking process that took around 500 hours of work, a statement on the television show reported. By comparing the bust with historical images of Nefertiti, the researchers were able to show that the “Younger Lady” mummy was indeed the famous queen.

TEXU_S4_PARIS_54165 Host of “Expedition Unknown,” Josh Gates examines the sculpture of the “Younger Lady” mummy in the Paris studio of paleoartist Elisabeth Daynès. Sculpture by Elisabeth Daynès in partnership with Travel Channel’s “Expedition Unknown” and Josh Gates. Photo courtesy of Travel Channel.

Related: Ancient Egypt Artifacts Depicting Ramses The Great As Victorious General Were Spreading Fake News

“This remarkable face seems to be consistent with ancient representations of Nefertiti,” Aidan Dodson, an Egyptologist at Bristol University who was involved in the project, said in a statement. “It’s extraordinary. When taken alongside the latest reading of the genetic data, this provides us with truly exciting evidence that the mummy of the Younger Lady is none other than Queen Nefertiti herself.”

The show is focused on investigating three of the most powerful women in ancient Egyptian history: Hatshepsut, Cleopatra and Nefertiti, a statement on the show reported.

Related: Ancient Egyptian Pyramidion Found Next To Largest Obelisk Hints At Existence Of Queen’s Lost Chamber 

According to The History Channel, Nefertiti was queen from 1353 to 1336 B.C. and may have even ruled Egypt herself after her husband, Pharaoh Akhenaten, died. Her full name, Neferneferuaten, means “beautiful are the beauties of Aten, a beautiful woman has come,” an homage to both the Egyptian chief god Aten and the queen’s renowned beauty.

The 3-D imaging was only able to copy the mummy’s facial structure, other features such as skin and eye color were up to artist interpretation. Many soon took to Twitter in anger over the artist’s decision to make Nefertiti so fair-skinned.

Since Nefertiti lived far before the time of photography there is no way to know the exact skin tone of the ancient queen, although the most famous bust depicting the queen, which was believed to be created in 1345 B.C., depicts a darker monarch.

Regardless of the skin tone controversy, the new bust is celebrated for its detail to other aspects of accuracy, such as the depiction of the queen’s muscle tone and skin tissue depth. Combined, these details reveal the face of one of the most influential and well known women in world history.

TEXU_S4_PARIS_54312 The facial reconstruction of the “Younger Lady” mummy next to a 3-D replica of its head created from digital mapping. lpture by Elisabeth Daynès in partnership with Travel Channel’s “Expedition Unknown” and Josh Gates. Photo courtesy of Travel Channel.

9 Feb 2018 – My thoughts lead me to the Akashic records. One of my favorite vampire flicks, Queen of the Damned starred Aaliyah who played Akasha…the Mother of all vamps.

What are the Akashic Records and why do they resonate with me?  It is because the place I spend the most quality time with the God of my understanding is outside under the sky.


Akashic records

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In theosophy and anthroposophy, the Akashic records are a compendium of all human events, thoughts, words, emotions, and intent ever to have occurred in the past, present, or future. They are believed by theosophists to be encoded in a non-physical plane of existence known as the etheric plane. There are anecdotal accounts but no scientific evidence for existence of the Akashic records.[1][2][3]

Akasha (ākāśa आकाश) is the Sanskrit word for ‘aether‘ or ‘atmosphere’. Also, in Hindi, akash (आकाश) means ‘sky’ or ‘heaven’.

Theosophical Society[edit]

The Sanskrit term akasha was introduced to the language of theosophy through H. P. Blavatsky (1831–1891), who characterized it as a sort of life force; she also referred to “indestructible tablets of the astral light” recording both the past and future of human thought and action, but she did not use the term “akashic”.[4] The notion of an akashic record is attributed to Alfred Percy Sinnett, who, in his book Esoteric Buddhism (1883), wrote of a Buddhist belief in “a permanency of records in the Akasa” and “the potential capacity of man to read the same.”[4][5] By C. W. Leadbeater‘s Clairvoyance (1899) the association of the term with the idea was complete, and he identified the akashic records by name as something a clairvoyant could read.[4] In his 1913 Man: How, Whence, and Whither?, Leadbeater claims to record the history of Atlantis and other civilizations as well as the future society of Earth in the 28th century.[4][6]

Alice A. Bailey wrote in her book Light of the Soul on The Yoga Sutras of Patanjali – Book 3 – Union achieved and its Results (1927):

The akashic record is like an immense photographic film, registering all the desires and earth experiences of our planet. Those who perceive it will see pictured thereon: The life experiences of every human being since time began, the reactions to experience of the entire animal kingdom, the aggregation of the thought-forms of a karmic nature (based on desire) of every human unit throughout time. Herein lies the great deception of the records. Only a trained occultist can distinguish between actual experience and those astral pictures created by imagination and keen desire.

Rudolf Steiner[edit]

The Austrian theosophist and later founder of Anthroposophy, Rudolf Steiner, used the concept mainly in a series of articles in his journal Lucifer-Gnosis in 1904 to 1908 where he wrote about Atlantis, Lemuria, etc. .[7] Besides this, he used the term in the title of lectures on a Fifth Gospel held in 1913 and 1914, shortly after the foundation of the Anthroposophical Society and Steiner’s exclusion from the Theosophical Society Adyar.[8]

Aquarian Gospel[edit]

Levi H. Dowling‘s Aquarian Gospel of Jesus the Christ (1908) offers a version of the youth of Jesus Christ ostensibly based upon “akashic record” material.

See also[edit]


  1. Jump up ^ Ellwood, Robert S. (1996). “Theosophy”. In Stein, Gordon. The Encyclopedia of the Paranormal. Prometheus Books. pp. 759–66. ISBN 978-1-57392-021-6. 
  2. Jump up ^ Regal, Brian (2009). Pseudoscience: A Critical Encyclopedia. Greenwood. p. 29. ISBN 978-0-313-35507-3. Other than anecdotal eyewitness accounts, there is no evidence of the ability to astral project, the existence of other planes, or of the Akashic Record. 
  3. Jump up ^ Drury, Nevill (2011). Heaven: The Rise of Modern Western Magic. New York: Oxford University Press. p. 308. ISBN 978-0-19-975100-6. 
  4. ^ Jump up to: a b c d Brandt, Katharina; Hammer, Olav (2013). “Rudolf Steiner and Theosophy”. In Hammer, Olav; Rothstein, Mikael. Handbook of the Theosophical Current. Leiden, NL; Boston: Brill. pp. 122–3. ISBN 9789004235960. 
  5. Jump up ^ Sinnett, Alfred Percy (1884). Esoteric Buddhism (5th ed.). Houghton Mifflin. p. 127. 
  6. Jump up ^ Besant, Annie; Leadbeater, C.W. (1913). Man: How, Whence, and Whither?. Adyar, India: Theosophical Publishing House. 
  7. Jump up ^ Aus der Akasha-Chronik. Partial English edition: Steiner, Rudolf (1911). The Submerged Continents of Atlantis and Lemuria, Their History and Civilization. Being Chapters From The Âkâshic Records. London: Theosophical Publishing Society.  First complete English edition: Steiner, Rudolf (1959). Cosmic Memory. Engledood, N. J.: Rudolf Steiner Publications. 
  8. Jump up ^ Steiner, Rudolf (1950). The Fifth Gospel. Investigation of the Akasha Chronicle. Five lectures given in Christiania, 1913. London: Rudolf Steiner Publishing.

9 Feb 2018 – This second meditation is going off of the Morphing Through time train of thought all the way through to the problem with addictions in Americans.

9 Feb 2018 Love and Abandonment (Morning meditation)

9 Feb 2018 /1019 am

I was outside preparing to do some “chalking” when a revelation about connection between “wisdom,” Why of Life and Death and Tree of Life came. It was instigated by my finding seeds that blew down from cotton tree to my hoodie. My good friend the cotton tree helping me again. What came brought forth a lot of tears. If I (we as a species) had remained ignorant, didn’t need to find out why (curiosity) I (we) wouldn’t know or care about living and dying. Sentience and consciousness, “awareness” would never have happened and may be we would have been happier — “Ignorance is Bliss” philosophy.

17 May 2017 – Cottonwood seed ships

Love changed everything because with love comes “attachment.” Something I learned more about through Buddhism’s the 4 Noble Truths and the 8 Fold Path. When you lose something or someone you love more than “existence” you will tear heaven and earth apart to find it, reclaim it. What I was willing to do at Mesa Springs when I didn’t know where Kyle was. What happened to me for 3 years after we lost our Sammy.

Source Internet: Seed of Life. I loved that this is made in stained glass with chakra colors.

Abandonment creates some of the largest energy vortexes, human black holes. It can be “perceived” or intentional abandonment but the abandoned feel it all the same. Why?!Where did you go?! When are you coming back?! Will you come back?!

(My mother, my Grandparents….all those I’ve loved and lost for whatever reason. I had to grieve and heal — fill the holes their “abandonment of me” left behind.

All of us have lost people, places and things through our shared journey. Are we so attached to these that we are willing to destroy ourselves and a planet to retrieve them? This is just what I see for myself. I hope there is something in this morning meditation that resonates with you….is helpful. I would ask you, what positive, loving aspect of existence can you put in the “holes” some sort of abandonment has made in your mind, body and most importantly your soul?

What do I do? All through my blogs here is what I’ve learned to do for myself with unseen guidance and loving nudges from the tangible elements that surround me. The arts, meaningful work, chores, spirituality, helping others and educating myself about people, places and things I don’t understand before making judgements about them. It is in the latter I have come to realize I can judge no one nor is there anyone on this earth who can either. We are all imperfect and it is in that imperfection we are amazing creations capable of greatness beyond our wildest dreams. We are here for each other. No one person can fix this shared mess our world has become. We must learn to build bridges instead of more walls.

17-feb-2011-my-puppy-sammy-and-his-tennis-ball (Sammy crossed the rainbow bridge 27 April 2011)

My Mom Jeanne and my Grandpa Harold (Hal) Becker on her wedding day, 21 Nov 1965.

8 Feb 2018 Dr. Wilhelm Reich books The Cancer biopathy and Function of the Orgasm Alvarado TX

8 Feb 2018 Jackie Wygant Blue Book for Alcoholics Anonymous Alvarado TX meditation about addiction like sugar etc

8 Feb 2018 Two books from Grandma Becker and Aunt Ruth to help me heal inside when I was younger I read from How to Be your own best friend out loud Alvarado TX

8 Feb 2018 Morphing through Time (Enigma)

8 Feb 2018 – sketch I did this morning. He looks like a composite of all the men I have loved and or admired through my life all in one. I did a numbers thing with my name Jacqueline and Kyles today. My name’s letters added up was 106 and Kyle’s 53. I thought that was so beautiful that he would be the other part of me like that!

Morphing Thru Time


Earth. A biosphere.
A complex,
Subtly balanced life support system.

Et turtur nidum,
Ubi reponat pullos suos
Altaria tua Domine virtutum,
Rex meus, et Deus meus
(and the turtledove a nest
Where it might place its young
Your altar of strengths, Lord,
My king and my God,)

We are floating over the line
Let us follow our mind
All of our life we’ll wait for the answer
And the question is why

If we’re following our mind
We can glide into light
No one knows if there’ll be an answer
While we’re morphing through time

We are floating over the line
Let us follow our mind
All of our life we’ll wait for the answer
And the question is why

Enigma – Morphing thru time (with lyrics)

Someone I didn’t know before that I heard for the first time today:

Geraldine Farrar – Kreisler: Star of Love


Alice Geraldine Farrar[1] (February 28, 1882 – March 11, 1967) was an American soprano opera singer and film actress, noted for her beauty, acting ability, and “the intimate timbre of her voice.”[2] She had a large following among young women, who were nicknamed “Gerry-flappers”.[3][4]

8 Feb 2018 – books Kyle and I picked up at Half Price Books today.

8 Feb 2018 Refilling Energy Voids

This morning I woke up thinking about friends of mine who have had weight loss surgery. I’ve had three friends undergo this sort of procedure and the recovery process has been unique for all three of them. Now the reason I got to thinking about this was because it’s on the a train of thought I’ve been on about energy vampirism and energy consumption.

I have been frustrated with one of my friends in particular because it feels like since she had the surgery, she’s been grasping about for something to refill the energy void left behind by not being a to eat food like she used to. Well, a flag went up in myself the past couple of days. Why am I so frustrated with her? I’m looking in the mirror at a past reflection that’s why! I learned this from Shakti Gawain’s books many years ago. Usually if we don’t like someone for whatever reason, it means there is something about ourselves that we recognize in them that we don’t like. It may be we’ve moved past whatever the person is reflecting to us or we are still working through it and the person is an “ugly” reminder of what we have yet been unable to change about yourself.

What I have found myself saying in regards to the friend I’m thinking of is a quote from a movie put into a song by Velvet Acid Christ: “Did you hear it?” “It shows you things, horrible things.” “The dark inside me, from the other place… I won’t go back there, I won’t.”

The Dark Inside Me

BUT…..if others had not “fed” me when I was growing up, I see everyday in the news and through history just the sort of human being, “monster”, I could have become. As I reflect on my younger years, there were times when I was a real pain in the ass to be around. I was negative, judgmental, draining, ignorant, willful and extremely unhappy. I didn’t know how to “feed myself” (soothe myself.) Religion alone did not help me, it was specific people that were part of of my life that helped me. When I was younger I used to be fascinated with monsters real and imagined and I think part of that was my quest to try and understand what the hell was going on with me! Why was I so different?!

I realized my fascination with Dracula had an origin story in the Catholic Church ritual, Communion, “The Last Supper.” “Flesh of my Flesh, Blood of my Blood.” I can remember as a little girl truly thinking about what those words meant and I made myself break out into a sweat and nearly black out right as I knelt in a church service! If you were to take those words literally it was like cannibalism or vampirism…..consuming God! Dracula at the pulpit!  What does one do to fill the “void” the absence of a healthy relationship (to include sexual partner) provides when you are a priest?

I drew this man 11 Oct 2012 – as I drew him he morphed and at one point looked a lot like JRM which was funny as I had just found out JRM was going to portray Dracula

What I have learned from my own experience with this is when you lose something like innocence or someone significant to you like my mother committing suicide when I was barely a year old, a great energy void was created….had to be filled. I spent many years trying to put people, places, pets, “shiny things” things (which became addictions in some cases) ..anything that gave me even a fleeting glimpse of happiness into the void my mother’s death left in me. I learned the hard way that there is nothing on this earth that can fill such a void but God.

The God I understood and was taught about growing up came from churches and books. I grasped about into the New Age scene, Holistic type remedies, art, photography, work, sex, marriage, pet ownership, helping others through community service and still I didn’t truly know who God was for me. Then came that day a couple of years ago since we moved here to Texas , when my Dad and I were sitting on my back porch, and we agreed on something for the first time in a long time…..”God is in everything.”

It was kind of an “A-ha” spiritual moment for me. I have always felt like a huge part of my Dad was unknown to me because of what happened with my Mom. Here was something we both agreed on and a seed was planted in me.

30 Aug 2012 Jackie Drawing – when Dad first met Spot

When our cocker spaniel Sammy died in 2011 was another big whammy for both Kyle and I. For me, losing Sam was like losing a child and it was one of the most painful experiences I’ve had. I can remember going out to the field down the street, my “blooming field” before it became houses, and screaming in 100 degree heat at God, “BRING HIM BACK!” Just wandering everywhere looking for him, imagining he was walking with me. There was only ever going to be just one Sam and I had to find a way to live without him. I had to save myself.

Back in April 2014 I was walking in the field down the street from our house before it became houses and found half of an Choctaw Indian Christmas ornament and later found the other half at the entrance to our neighborhood! I thought it was a sign my friend Erin who is part Choctaw was having a son but we got three puppies….Link…instead. In a way it was like God answering my pleas to bring my Sammy back!

Everything is energy, everything is a sort of “food.” This is emotions, things, people, animals and nature. All of these elements consciously or subconsciously feed us energy in some way. Human beings can become “black holes” if left unchecked. A human black hole will devour anything and anyone in it’s path….negative energy vampire so to speak. Negative energy is better than not being fed and there are people, very visible people on our world stage, that model this sort of behavior for us and it may not even be a conscious effort on their part….it’s just who they are now.

We have built a society that teaches us to seek people, places and things to fill the void only God energy can fill. Well if everything is God then what to “eat?” Our diet is not just about what tangible foods we put into ourselves. Our diet is not about what celebrity’s image and spirit we can devour until we grow bored and move on. Our diet is not about the latest video game we devour until the next patch of “crack” comes out. Our diet is not supposed to be the latest electronic gadget or phone but it has become that and we are unfufilled…restless…addicted….bored and grasping about for sustainable food that just isn’t there! Do you get the idea? What are you “eating” you stay “full?”

Something else came to me from the Horror genre….the phrase that is always the worst thing to say in a horror movie, “I’ll be right back.” They never come back. After all these thousands of years of waiting for Jesus to come back he hasn’t…..or has “he?” Is God deaf to our cries? No. It’s like with our Sam. I begged God to send me Sammy back and then came Link! Three years we waited…Link was one of three boys. It was like God saying I will even let you choose! God heard me and I believe sent us Link to heal my heart but not to save me…to help me heal myself. Kyle and I had to learn to “feed ourselves” and not rely on Sammy. There is a reason dog spelled backwards is God!

Look in the mirror people. Who is there and do you love that person without condition? What are you “feeding” that person? There is nothing of this world that can fill the energy voids pain, suffering, loss and change create but God. Who is the God of your understanding? Does this God love you and all the world without condition?  Learn to “feed yourself! without “feeding” off of others or using artificial God’s. 

I know this is a lot but it’s what I was lead to write this morning. I’m not trying to change you or tell you what you should do or what you should believe and definitely not judging you. I’m just trying to help you help yourselves by sharing my experience, strength and Hope.

I hope something here resonates with you and if it does, pass it on in your way. We are all two-way or transistor radio’s in a way – sending and receiving signals.

Audioslave – Show Me How to Live

Nail in my hand
From my creator
You gave me life
Now show me how to live …
And with the early dawn
Moving right along
I couldn’t buy and eyeful of sleep
And in the aching night under satellites
I was not received
Built with stolen parts
A telephone in my heart
Someone get me a priest
To put my mind to bed
This ringing in my head
Is this a cure or is this a disease
Nail in my hand
From my creator
You gave me life
Now show me how to live
Nail in my hand
From my creator
You gave me life
Now show me how to live
And in the after birth
On the quiet earth
Let the stains remind you
You thought you made a man
You better think again
Before my role defines you
Nail in my hand
From my creator
You gave me life
Now show me how to live
Nail in my hand
From my creator
You gave me life
Now show me how to live
And in your waiting hands
I will land
And roll out of my skin
And in your final hours I will stand
Ready to begin
Nail in my hand
From my creator
You gave me life
Now show me how to live
Nail in my hand
From my creator
You gave me life
Now show me how to live
Show me how to live
Songwriters: Brad Wilk / Chris Cornell / Timothy Commerford / Tom Morello
Show Me How to Live lyrics © Sony/ATV Music Publishing LLC