Last night I dreamt about being another Jackie who was helping to escort a dangerous psychiatric patient. The patient was carrying a needle filled with a lethal substance and the escorts were trying to keep her away from other people. The Jackie escort got too close to the patient and the patient injected her with the deadly fluid. It was like they were stabbing someone with a knife the way they did it. Someone also helping to escort the patient then said, “Now your going to die” to Jackie, but Jackie didn’t die. She got in the body of someone named Becky and was conscious of it. She knew she was in Becky’s body — how it felt and everything but her consciousness was still Jackie’s. The people Jackie worked for turned out to be douche bags. She saw them say after she died “the one that should have gone died.” Then they were in the patients house…the largest “den” they’d ever found. It was an abandoned apartment complex full of stuff they were going through. There were pieces of clothing, crude drawings etc.
What do I made of this? I think it’s my subconscious finally trying to work out my last trip to the hospital and some life issues I’ve been dealing with. When you have a break-down, it can feel like being taken over by some unseen force and you are powerless to do anything about it. It’s a lot like this dream where you are escorting somebody else around! It’s interesting how the mind sorts through the traumas we go through in life.
Anyhew……I’ve been real floaty and disconnected the past couple of days. To help myself get grounded, I’ve been making Tree of Life sun-catchers and pendants. I love making things and giving them to people if they say they like what I’ve made. The smiles and the light I see in someone’s eyes when this happens is more valuable to me than any amount of money in the world! People have told me I should try to sell the things I make. I’ve tried but have found that it takes away from the joy of the craft when money gets involved.
For me crafting is like it was when I was playing World of Warcraft and doing trade skills. I was one of those kind of crafters that just wanted to get my skill level up so I’d advertise in the Trade channels like this: “Free with your mats!” If someone wanted something made, all they had to do was provide the materials for what they wanted made and we’d make it for free. Most customers utilizing this service would tip the crafter, but it was strictly optional. We used to get on the crafters that required a tip because that kind of defeated the whole thing! It’s not a tip if you require it for the service lol.
In the real world I think, as my friend Dymoon mentioned in a recent blog, people don’t want to pay for something they can get cheaper at the Dollar Store. This “throw-away/disposable society” mentality makes it difficult for crafters to get a return on the cost of materials they use to make things and their time. I can remember a blacksmith we knew that could forge a rose out of one piece of metal. He told us about a customer wanting to pay him $10 for such a rose! WHAT?! Artists and craftsman tend to make and create for the pure joy of doing it, not for how much money they can potentially make. The truth is, as with any commodity, something is only worth what someone else is willing to pay for it. Sometimes you just have to hold out for the right “someone” who understands and appreciates the value of hand-made things.
This is probably why it seems most artists and crafters make more money after they are dead then when they are alive. It’s a shame but it kind of makes sense! When you love what you are doing, how much money you make is usually not your primary focus. This isn’t the case for all people, but it is for me.
I think when you are doing something you don’t enjoy is when you focus on the money, that’s how it was for me: “They aren’t paying me nearly enough to put up with this shit!” comes to mind lol. When I was in the Air Force, that thought did occur to me many times! It feels like to me that we live in a world where a lot of people are forced to and or “should on themselves” to do jobs that they don’t like for survivals sake at the expense of their health and overall well-being.
Sadly there is still an ancient and dysfunctional system firmly in place to make sure everyone stays in their “places!”
http://www.gainesvilleregister.com/community/blacksmith-shares-tricks-of-the-trade/image_ad97f59c-f407-11e4-9133-bbdcd8de7706.html – John Jobe, Blacksmith Alvarado TX
Blacksmith shares tricks of the trade
Jim Perry , May 6, 2015