Hello. I know I’m writing again so soon, it’s helping me process Amber’s tangible absence. I have no expectations of anyone besides myself reading this or anything else I write here. This blog is a therapeutic tool for me to process things I’m going through in words and pictures and in the process of helping myself, may be I can help at least one other person! Grief is one of those things that everybody gets through in their own way with the God of their understanding. My “energy God” uses words, music and imagery….symbolism.
I believe every single person who has a concept of spirituality and divinity has their own version of the God of their understanding. Just like with everything about our existence, because of our biologically diverse perceptions, I believe the same holds true in the spiritual realm. What I’m about to share with you will help illustrate what I mean. What I experienced, in my unique perception, was having a conversation whereas others with different perceptions might read what follows and blow it off as superstition, coincidence or chance.
Have you ever really understood, consistently, how the God of your understanding is trying to talk to you? To reach you?
For those with Jesus as the God of their understanding, this book I read many years ago explores what I’m trying to explain in a humorous way:
Imaginary Jesus is an hilarious, fast-paced, not-quite-fictional story that’s unlike anything you’ve ever read before. When Matt Mikalatos realizes that his longtime buddy in the robe and sandals isn’t the real Jesus at all, but an imaginary one, he embarks on a mission to find the real thing. On his wild ride through time, space, and Portland, Oregon, he encounters hundreds of other Imaginary Jesuses determined to stand in his way (like Legalistic Jesus, Perpetually Angry Jesus, and Magic 8 Ball Jesus). But Matt won’t stop until he finds the real Jesus—and finally gets an answer to the question that’s haunted him for years. Be warned: Imaginary Jesus may bring you face-to-face with an imposter in your own life.
So on the way home from walking with Kyle, Link and Spot, I found 2 more pieces of the clear, round decorative glass….they weren’t there yesterday when I took Spot for a walk alone in the afternoon and actively looked for them! The point is not to be actively looking and looking with more than just your eyes! So now there are 10 pieces of glass that shine with prisms and rainbows in the sunlight…like I imagine Amber is looking now without her body….a shiny, prismatic orb of light.
I added those two pieces to my sanctuary and was listening to the song Why, by Annie Lennox and what happens? All the sudden from my neighbors yard a bag floats over the fence and lands on the baby oak tree by my sanctuary. I went over and it was a plastic grocery bag from our local grocery store called David’s. It said on the bag, “Celebrate at David’s!” What clicked in my mind seeing that? It was like a message from one of the most influential David’s in my life, David Bowie. This is how “conversations” with the God (pure light energy – no labels for identity) typically go lol. Someone else might interpret what happened completely different, as just a random and insignificant sequence of events. I don’t live my life that way and because of that, I have a lot of talks with my God about everything! Yes I have a rich and vibrant imagination some might say, but where does our imagination come from?
During one of our visits with my Dad, we were sitting on our swing seat we have out back and talking about our spirituality. My Dad and Mom are devoted, practicing Catholics, something we used to share, but I have decided to go on in my life without religion. This said, we agreed on something he said and that is “God is in everything.” Whatever the identity or vision you have of divinity or even if you don’t believe in such things, there is energy, what people like me think of as God, and there is energy in every thing and every person. I think this might be something we could all agree on?
Anyhew….to anyone purposefully or accidentally bumbling into my dimension here….thank you and I hope you found something you may have been looking for on a conscious or subconscious level.