3 Oct 2016 Transformation of a shard of glass and Witnessing the sins of our past (wire wrap glass pendant and Roots 2016 Ep 2)

Hello to you….it’s about 2:18 pm and I would be outside trying to process things but our neighbor is having some yard work of some kind done that involves a concrete truck so….writing therapy it is!  My thanks to anyone who decides to visit and read what I’ve written here.  I know you, like me,  have nearly been beaten into apathy about such matters as the cruelty of human slavery.  I am forcing myself to step through this conditioned response to such matters….reinforcing my heart that seems to be made of glass sometimes….so easy to break!

So at 12:02 pm I decided I was strong enough inside to watch the second episode of the Roots 2015 television miniseries and while I watched, I wire wrapped that beautiful piece of glass I shared with you on Sunday into a pendant.   The piece of glass, like my friend Easy said about finding such things, like it was put there just for me to find.

The best way to describe how I’m feeling right now is “scrambled eggs.”  I just feel turned inside out at witnessing a revisiting to the sins of my country’s past!  Every single member of this cast evoked such strong feelings inside of me….pulling my heart and soul in all different directions.  I can’t imagine how hard it must have been to put yourself into these amazing people that tell this story and still have something of yourself left afterwards.   I can’t single out one performance as better than another….every single one, for better or worse is phenomenal!  WOW!

What is hard for me is that unlike in Dracula, where Jon was cast as a monster in human form I enjoyed watching,  his character Tom Lea is a human that is just a monster!  At least from what I’ve seen so far!  I think human beings that act like monsters are far more frightening than those of fiction!  When Kyle came home from class and saw that I was watching this he said, “so you decided to watch a horror film after all….”   Jon, as I’ve mentioned before, seems to be one of those actors destined to be the manifestation onscreen of what we fear most in our own natures.  He’s just so damn good at it!  I’m really looking forward to seeing him as a Joe Strummer in London Town!

So much of what I saw today in the first two episodes of this show are resonate in what’s happening every day in our country!  Namely the almost daily reports of black men and women in my country being harassed, abused and shot as they run in fear from  authority figures that do not seem to understand them and seem to still carry out their official duties from a place of fear….shoot first, ask questions later.  Not all cops are this way, but far too many are.

A rotten “code” has been embedded in the blood memory of an entire people and their culture…black, white, brown, red…all of us!  It is was so hard-wired into all of us, whatever side, that it’s still going on right now….different faces, places an circumstances but still nearly a rerun of history.   Every single day a struggle for so many, not knowing if sitting on your porch, going to work, driving your car, using the rights given to them in our Constitution, trying to get an education, buying your food…just daily things will mean you get to go home and stay safely at home that day.   Not just blacks either….all walks of life considered “minorities” are being subjected to this type of existence.

Things are slightly better in our time than it was then, but as I say so often….push and pull….a step is made forward for the better and 20 steps are taken back to this barbaric and embarrassing shared past.

This drawing I did on 25 May 2016 before bed makes sense to me now.   This is Jon as character the Tom Lea and Kizzy, the newly acquired slave woman he rapes just after she is brought to his farm and gives birth to a son. Kizzy is the daughter of Kunta and Bell.  I hadn’t seen the show yet when I drew this.

25 May 2016 - creepy drawing I did before bed!  I was compelled to grab my sketch pad and this is what came up.

25 May 2016 – creepy drawing I did before bed! I was compelled to grab my sketch pad and this is what came up.

http://www.hulu.com/watch/297394 – Tree with Deep Roots (Ep 2 of 4 part series Roots)

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt3315386/?ref_=fn_al_tt_1 – IMDB info on series

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt3315386/fullcredits?ref_=tt_ov_st_sm – complete list of cast and crew involved with this production

http://www.gradesaver.com/roots/study-guide/summary-chapters-68-83 – summary from book

https://saymber.com/2016/09/05/5-sept-2016-intergenerational-trauma-revisited-history-repeating-itself-yet-again-and-the-insanity-of-doing-the-same-things-expecting-different-results-the-oil-pipeline-protests-at-the-standing-ro/ – my blog post about intergenerational trauma that is currently being experienced by both sides of the fight against the Dakota Access “Black Snake” oil pipeline

One of the happier scenes:


We know better, we can do better, we can be better…..we can’t stop trying.


5 comments on “3 Oct 2016 Transformation of a shard of glass and Witnessing the sins of our past (wire wrap glass pendant and Roots 2016 Ep 2)

    • I agree – saw the original version as well. It’s a paradox I think we are in when it comes to things like this. If we don’t “record” it we forget and because we “record it” we don’t forget and as with all pain and shameful things, slavery is something we’d like to forget or deny happened…is still happening. We want to forget but mustn’t forget and the ways to not forget hurt and make us want to forget! Does this make sense? It’s a paradox loop!

      • Yes. Not all of us require the same level of reminding, Jackie. So the remembrance does have to be at the level of the least aware. Painful. 😉 xoM

  1. it’s so sad that color makes a difference… it’s like judging a book by it’s cover… and normally we all know that this way makes NO sense… and nevertheless… we do it again&again…

    • You are so right my friend! People are afraid of who and what they don’t understand….what’s not like them. That’s why I try to find all the things we have in common….how we are alike more than unalike which leads to empathy and compassion….walking in someone else’s shoes instead of immediately judging someone or being afraid. We need more “dog-mind” and “child-mind” when it comes to living with each other – everyone is a friend…family…pack member for better or worse because no one is perfect. Love to you!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s